Justin got home a few days ago, everything has gone back to normal. After a few days of adjusting to living together again, it's just like old times, as if we were never separated. He gives me crap about school, asks about boys, and rags on the shows I watch. I’m so glad he’s home.

I haven’t told him about Javier. Frankly, I’m too scared. I’m sure he knows something went down while he was gone, but he hasn’t asked. I hate the disappointed look on his face when I have to tell him I screwed up yet again. More than even my parents, all I have ever wanted to do was make him proud, he’s my hero.

“Hey, Emma,” Justin hollers from the kitchen.

“What?”

“Why didn’t you ever write to me while I was gone?” He’s leaning against the wall, arms crossed.

Heat flashes up my neck, I wanted to write to him and have that connection to my big brother. I tried once, and Javier gave me the beating of a lifetime, ended up breaking a few fingers so I wasn’t able to hold a pen but I don’t want Justin to know that.

“Uh, because it's the 21st century? No one hand writes letters anymore.” I snark, trying to hide my embarrassment.

“Really? Charlie and Logan got handwritten letters from home all the time.”

“Seriously? Logan and Charlie also had girls waiting for their dicks when they got home. What's the deal, it's a letter,” I snap back.

“We didn’t usually have internet access, so mail was the only communication in and out. Knowing that you’re going to come back from a mission to letters from home helps keep morale up.” He recites to me like he’s memorized from a textbook.

“If you’re that lonely, sign up for a pen pal before you leave next time. There are websites that will hook up deployed soldiers with lonely women stateside.” Why won’t he just drop this? Javier made it clear that I was not to send letters to my brother, deployed or not.

He’s staring at me, obviously seeing through my attitude. He always could.

“What kind of trouble did you get into this time?” He makes it seem like I go looking to screw up my life.

“It doesn’t matter, it's over now.” My voice is quiet, defeated.

Walking toward the living room and taking a seat on the couch, he slings an arm around me and pulls me into his side.

“Talk to me, Em. Tell me what happened.” I hate that tone, the ‘tell me all your secrets and I’ll fix them’ tone. It breaks me every time.

“I met a guy.” My eyes fill with tears, but I don’t look up at him.

“Go on.”

“He was nice, charming, cute. He made me feel special, beautiful. We met at school, he told me he was working while taking classes to support his family. Neither of his parents spoke English so they couldn’t find work.”

I stand up and begin pacing the room. I can’t look at him as I recount what happened while he was gone. The disappointing tone in his voice is enough, but that look a pity, that will throw me over the edge.

“He would come to my place, or we would meet up in town, he said his family lived together so if we wanted privacy we couldn't go there. One night, he said he needed to meet a friend, turns out that meeting with his friend was actually a drug deal.”

I begin sobbing, wrapping my arms around my center in an attempt to hold it together. Suddenly, I’m wrapped in my brother’s arms as he pulls me in tight to his chest, rubbing my back. I cry even harder, soaking Justin’s shirt in the process, this is the part I don’t want to tell him.

“After that, I wasn’t allowed to go home. He took me back to his house, there was no family. It was all a lie. He lived in a disgusting, run-down shack with some of his ‘friends’. When we got there, some of his ‘friends’ where high, all of them had guns. They all looked at me like fresh meat, they treated me like it too. I was terrified.”

Justin’s grip on me tightens, as he fights for control. I’m not sure if he’s angry at me or the situation, but I know if I look into his eyes I will see nothing but anger.

“After that, I was allowed to exist to make Javier look better. If I stepped out of line, did something he didn’t like, I was punched. He would hit me, kick me, rape me.” My voice dropped to a whisper, hoping he didn’t hear what I said, but I know he did.

I’m embarrassed, ashamed. I should never have believed the lies, I should have been smarter.

“Is there more? How did you get out?” I can hear the anger in his voice.

“He told me I was his until I die. He wasn’t some low-level drug dealer, there are people under him and working for him. After a really bad day, I couldn’t take it anymore, and I found my cell phone while he was passed out. I called Jimmy, and he came and got me.”

Justin lets out a deep sigh. “I owe him a huge thank you.”

At that, my phone starts ringing. Walking across the room, I see it’s Katie calling.

“Hey Katie, what's up?”

“Hey! Avery and Amber just got back with Charlie, so we are going to have the baby shower this weekend and combine it into a welcome home BBQ for the guys, you and Justin are coming!”

“If we don’t get a choice, why did you call?” I can’t help but laugh at her.

“So you know when to be here. I’ll text you the details later. See you soon!”

Hanging up, I turn to find Justin watching me. I can see the gears turning in his head, making plans.

“Katie and Logan are having a BBQ this weekend, we’re going.”

If she didn’t give me a choice, he doesn’t get one either.

“Seems like not only bad things happened while I was gone,” Justin says with a smile.

“Oh really, what might those be?”

“You made friends, good ones for the first time in a long time. I feel better leaving knowing you have good people around to take care of you.”

I shake my head. “I don’t need people to take care of me, but it’ll be good to get together and have some fun.”