I lift Caitlin back into my arms, but this time I scoop her up and hold her against me tight. Her head rests against my chest. It reminds me of all those old movies where the guy carries his virgin bride over the threshold, eager to claim what’s his.

Except she ain’t your wife and you’re keeping your dick in your pants, remember?

Yeah, except for that. I force myself to look away from her distracting beauty and walk her into Razor’s room where she’s been camping out since we saved her. The bed has Caitlin’s suitcase on it, so Razor shuffles ahead of me and clears it off so I can lay her down. Placing her head carefully on the pillow, I gently tug my arms out from under her and tuck her under the blankets.

“I’m gonna take a look in the medicine cabinet,” Razor calls over his shoulder as he walks out.

I sit down next to her and test her forehead again with my hand. She’s definitely feeling cooler now, but still running a bit warm. I lean my head back against the headboard and close my eyes. I’m not the praying kind, I gave up on it a long time ago when every time I talked to the big man in the sky my life seemed to just get worse. Still, the idea of losing Caitlin is enough to humble me. I don’t slide off the bed onto my knees or anything, but I do fold my hands together and plead with God.

“Hey, it’s me. Adam.” I clear my throat. Adam Schiffer,” I clarify. I’m not sure how these prayers work, so I want to make sure he knows who the message is from. “Um, I need your help. It’s not for me, so I don’t know if that bumps me up in line, or whatever, but this isn’t some kind of request for winning lotto numbers or anything. We’ve got a situation here.” I keep my eyes squeezed shut and nod toward Caitlin. “This woman crashed into our lives, literally, and now she’s sick. There’s no help coming for almost a week and if we lose her… if she dies…” My voice cracks and even though my eyes are shut, tears fall from them. “Well, please don’t let her die. I know we’ve been through a lot, God. Razor and I, oops, I mean Derek and I, we’ve been through a lot, but if she doesn’t make it, that might just be the thing that breaks us. Please, she’s young, she’s got her whole life ahead of her. Please.”

I hear Razor thumping back down the hall toward the room and I open my eyes, wiping my cheeks off with my fingertips, I give a loud sniff and push the emotions away. I can’t even remember the last time I shed a tear about anything. After we were pushed out of the SEALs I kind of shut everything off. I guess you could say I lost my faith in more ways than one. Not only in prayer, but in humanity, decency, even hope.

Now all those things are flooding back and along with it are the emotions I thought I’d long ago lost. I guess they never really went away after all. They just needed something truly special to bring them back.

They needed her.

“I’ve got some Ibuprofen that should drop her temperature back down. Can you help me try to get her to take them?” Razor walks in with a bottle of pills and a glass of water.

“Sure.” I glance over at Caitlin and she’s out like a light. “How?”

“Well, we’ve got to try to wake her up enough to swallow them. If I just give them to her now, she’ll choke.” He sits on the other side of her. “Hey, Caitlin? You gotta wake up.” He nudges her softly but she doesn’t stir.

“Caitlin! Rise and shine! Time to get your ass up!” I yell like a drill sergeant trying to make the new recruits tremble in their boots.

“Huh?” She props herself up on her elbow. “What’s happening?” She slurs her words like she’s had a few too many.

“Well, that’s one way of doing it.” Razor smiles and holds a couple pills to Caitlin’s lips. “Here, take these. You’ve got a fever, this will help break it.”

“I need more cowbell.” She laughs at her joke but swallows the pills. Razor guides the glass of water to her lips and as soon as she swallows some down, she plops back on the bed and is completely passed out again.

Razor places the glass on the end table and leans back against the headboard. I do the same. Somehow, this feels right. And the exhaustion sweeping over me is making the walk back to my bed feel really far and unnecessary. I blink a few times, each time my eyelids open slower and feel heavier. Until I don’t open them at all, I just sink back and drift off.

* * *

The next thing I know the room isn’t so dark. It’s still storming outside and, even when there’s no snowfall, we don’t get a ton of light this time of year up here, so the room is still shrouded in shadows. However, it’s definitely daytime now.

I look down from where I’m sitting and see my fingers are threaded in with Caitlin’s. We’re holding hands. A quick glance over at Razor and I see she’s holding his hand on the other side of her too. I can’t help but smile. I know how I feel about her, but does he feel that way too? I check out the content, peaceful look on his face as he sleeps and am willing to bet he does.

The real question is: how does she feel about us?

Does it matter?

I know it shouldn’t. These aren’t the kind of things that should be occupying my mind. Yet, it nags at me. Even if she does feel something for us, for both of us, does that change anything?

I’m not sure.

Opening my fingers wide, I free my hand from hers and check her forehead for a fever. It’s passed and she feels “cool as a cucumber” as my gramps would say. I breathe a sigh of relief and watch her for a few moments before deciding it’s time to get out of bed. Sitting here staring at Caitlin isn’t going to do a damned thing for this swirling turmoil in my gut. I need a distraction.

I ease across the floor quietly and Gunnar rushes to my side, happy to see me.

“Hey, boy, how about we get some wood to make a fire?” I scratch him behind the ears and he wags his tail like he’s trying to shake the damned thing off. It only takes a moment to get my outdoor stuff on and we tromp out into the glistening, freshly fallen snow toward the big pile of logs.

The snowfall still hasn’t let up any, but I can feel a change in the air. I feel like maybe my prayers were answered. Caitlin looks like she’s on the mend now, so that’s a big change from where we were last night.

“Thank you.” I look up at the drab, gray sky.

Gunnar tilts his head at me and I laugh. “Wanna play fetch?” I pick up a smaller piece of kindling and whip it across the yard. He barrels after it enthusiastically and returns a moment later, but instead of dropping it so I can toss it again, he lies in the snow and starts chewing. “Suit yourself.” I shrug and go back to pulling wood from the pile.

“Need a hand?”

I turn to face Razor. I didn’t even hear him come out here.

“Sure, I figure we should stock up in case this gets worse.”

“Yeah, good idea.” He joins me next to the pile and begins grabbing a bunch of wood. “Caitlin looks like her fever has broken. She’s still asleep right now, so we’ll have to explain what happened with her when she wakes up.”

“Except for the kissing stuff,” I answer.

“Yeah, except for that,” he agrees.

We finish grabbing stock from the pile in silence, each of us lost in thought. Making our way inside, Razor and I drop off a couple armfuls of wood. “We should probably check the generator.” I don’t wait for him to answer, I head back out. Gunnar is still munching away happily on his stick.

“Sure, you check that and I’ll make sure the snow mobiles are good to go,” he offers, walking past me to the back of the cabin.

Ninety percent of the time they don’t get used. But we still keep the maintenance checks on them. Normally we walk and Gunnar pulls our sled when we’ve got short distances to travel. However, the snow mobiles are there in case we ever need to get somewhere quicker.

I pull the ripcord on the generator and she starts up like a dream. In the background, I can hear Razor making the snow mobiles sing as their engines roar to life. I shut everything back down and join him out back.

“Gonna start the truck!” I yell over the noise and point to Bessie, our big blue Chevy. He nods with understanding and I tug the key free from my pants and open her squeaky door. Somehow it feels even colder inside the cab. I turn the key, but she just protests and sputters at me.

I turn it again and she roars like a pissed off lion as she comes to life. Bessie doesn’t like having her sleep interrupted in the winter. She’s kind of like a bear, she likes to hibernate when the temperatures plunge. I let her run for a bit and then let her go back to sleep. Slipping free from the truck, Razor is waiting for me outside.

“Hey, man.” He tilts his head and looks straight into my eyes. I can see he’s got something he wants to ask. Something he’s been working out in his mind.

“What’s up?”

“Uh, last night when I said Caitlin was hot you said you knew and all that, right?”

“Yeah.”

“So, were you just making a joke? Or, well, I know that you know she’s beautiful. But I mean, do you think about her more than that?”

“Spit it out, Razor. What are you getting at?”

“I guess I feel like I’m starting to care about her, you know? And, I need to ask… are you into her too?” He holds me steady in his stare, waiting for my face to give me away.

“I am,” I finally answer, admitting out loud what I’ve known this whole time.

“Figures.” He scowls darkly for a moment, but then his eyes brighten as I see an idea forming in his mind. “The thing is, I feel like she might be into both of us too, do you get that vibe?”

“I don’t know.” I shake my head slowly. “I haven’t talked to her as much as you have, but even if she is, what are we gonna do about that? That’s not our style, man.”

“I know, I’m just talking.” He looks back up. “Okay, then it’s settled, neither of us will make a move, right? Just leave well enough alone.” He holds out his hand and I would laugh if he didn’t look so serious. He wants to make sure that I don’t move in on a girl he’s interested in. I can respect that. The truth is, I don’t want him making a move on her either.

“Deal.” I shake his hand firmly.

“All right, let’s get back inside before we freeze our nuts off out here.” Razor smirks.

“Sounds good.”