One year ago

Maddy and I sipped daintily on Cristal champagne as we wandered around the lush garden estates of our accounting firm's head partner. The soft music from a string quartet drifted among the roses as guests sipped champagne and nibbled on hors d'oeuvres while waiting for the reception to start.

The wedding of the mayor's daughter to the son of Chicago's most successful accountant was dubbed the biggest social event of the year. Everyone who was anyone was going. I hadn't known that Maddy and I were considered to be anyone until the day the invitation arrived. It felt good to be someone.

We had been invited because our accountant happened to be one of the rising stars at that particular accounting firm, as well as the fact that our little business was making waves in the travel industry. We were starting to receive recognition for our innovative approach to travel and there was no way Maddy and I were going to say no to a wedding predicted to cost well over a million dollars, even if we had no idea what to get them as a gift.

“Did you hear who is here?” Maddy whispered as we walked through an archway covered in roses.

“Who isn't here? I saw that actor you like,” I whispered back. I felt like we were sneaking around the property. Despite having rented two designer dresses and getting our hair and makeup done professionally, I still felt like we didn't belong. I had this horrible premonition that security was going to find out we were there at any moment and throw us out. I had the invitation with our names on it in my purse, ready to whip out and show anyone who asked.

“I saw him, but I'm talking about Logan Hayes,” Maddy said as we headed to the top of a grassy hill overlooking the main courtyard.

“I guess I'm not terribly surprised,” I replied, trying to sound nonchalant. Just his name made my heart start to pound. It had been a year since I had slept with him. Not even a phone call... the bastard. He was mysteriously “out on a business trip” every time I called his office. Luckily, with Maddy around, I had moved on to other, more important things. He wasn't worth my anxiety or heartache. I was completely over him. Totally.

“I thought you hated him and were going to punch his lights out the next time you saw him?” Maddy quipped.

“Oh come on, Maddy, that was months ago,” I said, waving a dismissive hand. “Eons, really.”

“It was last week.” She paused between two bushes covered with yellow flowers and gave me a very knowing look that I did not appreciate.

So maybe I wasn't completely over him.

“Okay, so maybe I still have some issues,” I conceded. “But, this is a wedding. I can behave. Besides, I've had a year to cool off. He's not worth the effort of being angry. Besides, what are the odds that we'll even run into him? There are hundreds of guests here!”

“Right.” Maddy gave me a skeptical look and downed the last of her champagne. “I'm going to get some more of this liquid gold goodness. You want some more?”

I held up my still mostly full glass. I didn't see what she found so special about it. It just tasted like plain old champagne to me. Dom Perignon tasted better anyway. “I'm good, thanks. I'll just wait here for you.”

Maddy nodded and headed off toward the main house where the bar was set up. I sipped on my champagne again and looked out at the house and gardens. Below me in the main courtyard, the happy bride and groom were walking onto the stage. They looked so blissfully in love.

“Enjoying the champagne?” a deep voice from my dreams asked from behind me. I shivered with simultaneous want and anger. I knew that voice. I turned slowly, almost afraid that I was dreaming, but there stood Logan Hayes.

The first thing I noticed wasn't the dark blue designer suit that fit him like a glove, or the way all his hair but one stray curl was smoothed back, or even the scent of his cologne; no, it was that he looked tired. His eyes didn't have quite the luster I remembered and he looked thinner. For one whole second, I hoped he wasn't sick, but then I remembered that I'd sooner have wished him dead.

“Better than Dom,” I lied. My heart was pounding like that of a petrified rabbit. I had envisioned this moment constantly for the past year, but now that it was here, I had no idea what I wanted to do. I wanted to hit him for what he did and kiss him because I wanted more. “What are you doing here?”

“I know the bride. She and I went to high school together once upon a time, and we even tried our hand at dating one another,” he replied. “We decided we were much better off as friends.”

“Do you know the groom, then?” I asked courteously, sipping mechanically on my champagne and trying not to panic. Slowly, though not without a fight, my anger toward him was giving way to my desire to kiss him, to run my fingers through his hair, to trace the words in his tattoo. I wanted him to not look so damn tired.

“I introduced them. Poor guy never thought he would get a girl like her, but they're perfect for each another. I get to claim matchmaker. It took a little time, but they're very happy they worked it out. It's really a sweet love story,” he said with a genuinely happy smile. He stepped back and looked me up and down. “You look fantastic, by the way. Stunning, really.”

“Thank you.” I could be polite. I wasn't even thinking of punching him. Maddy would be shocked. “Is the rest of your family here too?”

“My brother is around here somewhere. He almost wasn't invited,” he replied, glancing over toward where the music was coming from. “But Aiden knows how to apologize when he screws up. My father doesn't and as such wasn't invited.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.” I was secretly glad. Logan's old man could stuff it where the sun don't shine.

“Don't be. He is prone to doing things that make him very unpopular.” Logan shrugged. There was a back story I knew I was missing, but I didn't want to ask. I hoped Maddy would hurry up and get back so I could leave. Being this close to him was hard. Especially when he smiled.

I sipped on my champagne and smiled politely. If this was how the rest of our interactions were going to go, I could live with that. I knew that we would be running into one another, given our similar businesses and social obligations. Maybe, if we kept having these nondescript encounters, I would forget the ache in my heart. Maybe I would stop searching for his picture in the paper every morning just to find out what he was doing. Maybe I would stop missing the something we almost had.

“I also hear that your business is taking off,” he continued, taking a step closer. “I knew it would. Congratulations.”

Now I wanted to punch him. He had to bring that up and rub it in. I found my anger again and hated that I had lost it for even a moment. Damn him and his stupid smile making me forget how he never called. Damn him and his father for making me scramble to save my livelihood.

“No thanks to you or Travel, Inc.,” I replied with just a touch more venom than necessary.

“It was just business,” he said with a frown, as if he didn't understand what my issue was with him.

“Travel, Inc.'s portion of it perhaps, but what about yours? Or did you just forget about our little car ride?” I was a little afraid I was going to crush the delicate stemware in my fist and spill champagne and glass all over the garden.

He had the good grace to blush slightly. “I wanted to apologize about that...”

“Then why didn't you?” I demanded, my temper starting to boil over. “Why did you never call me?”

“Olivia, I wanted to-- I really did-- but I couldn't,” he explained. He ran a hand through his hair and dislodged another curl from his slick hairstyle. A few more passes and he would look like himself again.

“Because it is so hard to pick up a phone.” I took a step toward him and glanced around to make sure no one was nearby. “I'm not usually that kind of girl, but I did think I at least merited a phone call. The business part I could probably have forgiven as 'just business', but the fact that you led me on is inexcusable. You let me think I was... You could have at least told me that I meant nothing to you.”

He paled as my accusation hit its mark. “Olivia, it's complicated.” He started to reach out as if he wanted to touch me but thought better of it and put his hands in his pockets. “I wanted to, but my father made it very clear that I wasn't to contact you. I'm sorry.”

“Unbelievable.” I shook my head in disgust. “I'm so glad you do everything your father says. Do you still get an allowance for doing your homework and feeding the dog?”

“You're right. I should have called,” he said softly, retreating further. “I should have done things differently.”

“You're damn right you should have.” I stepped back from him, wanting to put as much distance as possible between us. For all his good looks, swagger and charm, he was still a little boy under his father's influence. “You missed out on a good thing, both me and Dream Vacations.”

He held me in his eyes for a moment. His expression was bleak, as if he was calculating the extent of his mistake and finding it bigger than he had first imagined. “Believe me, I know.”

We stood there in silence for a moment, the two of us just staring at one another and trying to figure out how to get out of this very awkward conversation.

“Olivia, I'm back,” Maddy announced, strolling up beside me and breaking the strange silence. “Who is this handsome young man you've found?”

“Maddy, this is Logan Hayes,” I said flatly. “Logan, this is Maddy Sawyer, the co-owner of Dream Vacations.”

“Oh my,” Maddy replied with a blush. “You are even better looking in person. I can totally see why Olivia follows you in the paper, on myFace, and won't stop talking about you.”

I closed my eyes and counted to five. That was the last thing I wanted Logan to know. I wanted him to think I cared even less for him than he did for me. I didn't need him knowing he had broken my heart in just one night. “No more champagne for you, Maddy.”

“Why? I'm enjoying myself,” Maddy asked, puzzled. I took a big breath before I opened my eyes and glared at her. “Oh. You're that Logan Hayes. Travel-Inc-broke-your-heart-and-scared-off-all-your-investors Logan Hayes. Got it. Shutting up now.”

Logan frowned. “What do you mean, 'broke-your-heart-and-scared-off-your-investors?'”

I purposefully ignored the first part of the question. “When word got out that Travel, Inc.'s Logan Hayes had taken me out for drinks and then dumped my business to the curb the next day, everyone thought there had to be a reason. Most of them assumed it was because you learned some terrible secret about my business. I could barely get a small business loan from the bank thanks to you.” The last part was a bit of an exaggeration, but I didn't care. It got the point across.

Logan's face fell. “I had no idea. No one ever said anything to me. I'm sorry,” he stammered, losing his usual calm confidence.

“Apology not accepted,” I replied tartly. I was still pissed.

“Yeah,” Maddy chimed in, her voice slurring. “She still cries about it sometimes.”

There was an awkward pause during which the three of us just stared at the ground for a moment. No one seemed to know what to say. The celebratory sounds of the wedding drifted up and provided a strange contrast to our uncomfortable lack of festivity. Logan was silent and then shook himself awake as if he came to some sort of conclusion in his head. Hopefully, it was to leave me alone.

“Well, it was delightful to meet you, Maddy.” Logan held out his hand to shake hers. She reciprocated firmly, and pulled him in close to her.

“If you could forget the fact that I mentioned you broke Liv's heart, that would be great,” she whispered, thinking I wouldn't hear. Except I could hear every cringe-inducing word. “She wouldn't want you to know that, especially because I don't think she's over you.”

I was never letting her drink again. She couldn't hold onto a secret with duct tape and super glue. I half-expected her to give him my Social Security number and bank PIN while she was at it.

“Consider it forgotten,” he assured her with an all-too-confident smile. I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to convince myself that killing them both would be too much work.

Logan cleared his throat, and I looked up and into his eyes. They were big pools of brown velvet that, despite my best efforts to resist them, sucked me in. My heart pounded in my chest as I struggled to look away. He smiled, and I realized he didn't look quite as tired as he had before. “It was wonderful to see you, Olivia. I hope to run into you again soon.”

“I wish I could say the same.” I plastered an obviously fake smile on my face and blinked demurely. He grinned and stepped forward, leaning in so he could whisper in my ear. Maddy's betrayal had given him back his usual cockiness in spades. He now knew he could drive me crazy, and that I wouldn't be able to stop him.

“I'll take that as a challenge,” he said, his breath tickling my hair. He smelled amazing; like soap and testosterone goodness. My stomach tightened as heat surged through me. I was so mad at him, but my body craved his like a drug. Dear Lord, I had forgotten just how good he smelled. It wasn't fair that he could twist my mind and body up so easily just by standing close to me. “Someday, you'll look forward to seeing me again.”

“It will be a cold day in hell,” I replied sweetly, stepping back and away from his intoxicating scent. I was torn between hot lust and cold fury. He had deceived me and almost ruined my company. I had every reason to hate his stinking guts. But I found myself wanting to touch him and forgive him for everything.

His brown eyes flashed with self-assured optimism. With a polite nod to Maddy, he turned and walked down a green path toward the dance floor with the bride and groom. I stared after him, trying and failing not to check out his butt, until he disappeared into the mass of guests below.

I felt like a deflated balloon. I was still so angry and hurt by what he'd done, but for whatever reason, as soon as he got close my body forgot everything except the way he felt. It was like he had cast a spell that would cause my body to find him sexually attractive no matter what my mind thought. I understood that a ruling from his father would be difficult to break, but I had thought we had shared a connection. It couldn't have been that hard to make a single phone call? To write an email?

I chugged the last bit of my champagne. I could hear laughter coming from the wedding, but instead of feeling happy, I was jealous and bitter. I had never thought that Logan and I were going to get married or grow old together, but that night we had together was special. I had thought it was at least going to go somewhere. I never expected to be left hanging without so much as a phone call. I certainly hadn't expected it to hurt so much.

“You okay? You want mine?” Maddy asked, offering me her glass. I glanced down at my empty one and nodded. She switched glasses with me, and I chugged down the bubbly liquid.

“I hate him,” I said softly, looking into the empty glass.

“No you don't,” Maddy gently contradicted me. “You want to hate him. You should hate him. But, you hate that you don't hate him.”

“You're drunk.” I watched as she wobbled slightly on her designer heels.

“Doesn't mean I'm not right,” she said with an all-too-knowing smile. “If you hated him, you wouldn't follow him on Twitter. You wouldn't know his social events, and you wouldn't blush every time someone says his name.”

“I only follow him to know how to make sure I don't get caught in his web again,” I explained. The champagne was finally starting to go to my head. I needed another glass. Maybe seven.

“And the blushing?” Maddy asked, eyebrows raised. It was very obvious she didn't believe me.

“He embarrassed me.” I sighed and put my hand on my hip. “And I do not blush at his name.”

Maddy held me in her gaze for a full beat before slowly shaking her head. “You've got some sort of torch for that man. Given the delightful way he fills out that suit, I can imagine part of it, but there's something else there.” She frowned, her eyes trying to focus through the alcohol. “But you need to be careful. That man hurt you once, and I saw the aftermath of just one night with him. You can't let him do that to you again. I don't know if you'd survive a storm like Logan again.”

“I have no intention of ever spending another night with that man,” I said solemnly. “He may drive me crazy, but I won't let him destroy what I've worked for.”

“Good.” Maddy nodded emphatically. “Now, we need some more champagne. Tyler's with his grandma, neither one of us needs to drive, and there is more free booze than we can drink. Let's get our party on and get that boy out of your head!”

I glanced toward the wedding party, wondering if Logan was down there. He was in my head. He had sneaked in there with his charm and warm brown eyes the night I met him and, unfortunately, hadn't found his way out. I needed to forget the way his hands felt on my skin and the way he made my heart skip. It had only been one night. I should be able to forget him and move on.

A dark blue suit stepped out into an open space on the dance floor below us and I felt my heart flutter, as I recognized Logan's shape. The bride stepped into his arms with a smile and he danced with her as her husband watched, spinning her in flawless circles. She laughed and kissed his cheek as the song ended. A stab of envy hit my stomach. She had it all.

“I really need another drink,” I mumbled. I wanted to forget Logan Hayes and his brown eyes and soft laugh entirely. I wanted to prove him wrong, that I would never look forward to seeing him, but I already knew I had failed.