Chapter Eighteen
Jax
Emilia was late for work the next day, and Emilia was never late. When she walked in she seemed withdrawn and irritable. She barely spoke to me the entire day, she just typed emails and made phone calls. I didn’t really mind that she didn’t seem to want to interact. I was annoyed with her for lying to me. I wanted to call her out, but Rider hadn’t wanted me to make matters worse. I didn’t agree with him, but I gave into his request simply so he didn’t have any extra stress. He was guilty enough about the fire damage, even though I’d reassured him I was just glad he was okay. The restoration company was able to clean away all of the smoke smell, and I reminded Rider he’d wanted to redo the master bedroom anyway. I told him to pick new carpet and a different paint color for the walls, and then the master bedroom would be even better than before the fire.
The thing I wanted to concentrate on was our new relationship. At times I almost couldn’t believe it was real. When we’d first met, I’d been positive I’d never love again. But from our first meeting, I’d been drawn to him. I’d wanted him to be my omega and husband, even as I’d told myself it was only for convenience sake. Slowly but surely it had become clear to me that I’d needed him, and craved his company. Claiming Rider had been the most exciting moment of my life, and I just wanted him near me always. Maybe that was why I’d almost believed Emilia’s lies at first, because this thing with Rider had seemed too good to be true.
But it was true.
As the weeks passed, Emilia continued to withdraw more. She didn’t even try to hide her disdain for Rider anymore. In the beginning, she’d at least faked politeness. But now? Now she left the room if Rider came in, and she avoided any contact with him. I found myself wishing she’d retire. Before, Emilia had been invaluable to me, probably because work had been all I’d cared about. Now, her cold attitude toward Rider pissed me off, and I wished there was a way to not have to spend so much time with her.
One afternoon Emilia and I were just finishing up our work when Rider arrived home. He came into the office, and Emilia immediately stood with that pinched expression she always wore around him. He smiled at her hesitantly, but she ignored him.
“I’ll be back in just a moment, Mr. Hamilton.” She left the room quickly.
Rider shook his head, watching her leave. “Was it something I said?”
I sighed. “Sorry. She’s getting worse.”
He patted his rounded belly. “The bigger my stomach gets, the more she seems to loathe me. Once I reach my second trimester she’ll probably quit just so she doesn’t have to see me pregnant with your baby.” He scowled. “The baby you should have had with Thomas.”
I frowned. “Hey, stop that. Come here.”
He approached. “You know it’s true.”
I wrapped my arms around him. “She can think what she wants. I’m happy you’re carrying my baby.” I kissed him, tasting mint on his mouth. Once the kiss ended, I held him. “I love you. Emilia has no say in that.”
“Okay.”
“How was work?”
He shrugged. “Long. Tiring. My feet hurt and my ankles are swollen.”
“Did the students behave?”
He chuffed. “No. Why would they do that when they could torment me instead?”
I laughed. “You should go take a nap.”
He frowned. “I don’t want to take a nap.”
“Liar.”
He licked his lips, a salacious gleam in his eyes. “You should come up there and take a nap with me.”
“Maybe I will.” I glanced at my desk. “I just have a few more things to finish up. Then I’ll come tuck you in.”
He smiled. “Awesome. I’ll be expecting you shortly.”
He turned to leave and I smacked his firm ass. “Be naked when I get there.”
“Yes, sir.” He moved to the door. “If I see Emilia, I’ll tell her the coast is clear and she can come back in here.”
I laughed.
Once he was gone, Emilia returned a moment later. She went straight to her desk and started working on her laptop. I stuffed down my irritation, and instead concentrated on finishing my work so I could go join Rider upstairs. It took about fifteen minutes for me to wrap up my emails, then I stood. “I think that’s enough for today.”
She looked startled. “I’m sorry?”
“I think we can be done for the day.”
Scowling, she said, “Oh.”
I closed my laptop, and moved toward the door.
“Where are you going?” She sounded strained.
I frowned. “To see Rider.”
Her jaw clenched. “So soon? I thought we’d work longer.”
“Well, I guess you were wrong. I’m going to spend some quality time with Rider.” Since when did she dictate my work hours? “You seem tense, Emilia. I think you could use a short day.”
Her cheeks flushed. “Hopefully soon we can go back to the way things were.”
I had no idea what she was getting at, so I just frowned. “I like things the way they are now.”
“Do you?” She looked confused. “I find that very hard to believe.”
“I don’t know why.”
“That boy, he’s ruined everything.”
Irritation prickled my neck. “Are you referring to Rider?”
Her lip curled. “Yes.”
“You need to show him more respect, Emilia. I’ve been way too patient with you.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yes.”
She stood, her eyes hard. “I’m not going to just stand by and see Thomas’s memory disrespected.”
I blew out an impatient breath. “Why are you so damn obsessed with Thomas? He was my lover, not yours. If I can move on, surely you can, Emilia.”
Her eyes widened. “Move on? Oh, there’s no moving on, Mr. Hamilton. Surely you realize that by now?”
I clamped my teeth so I didn’t say something I’d regret. When I felt calmer I walked to the door, and said, “I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a nice night.”
She scowled at me as I left the room.
I made my way upstairs, anger simmering in my gut. Maybe I needed to send her on a forced vacation. Her insolence was becoming too much to put up with. Rider was my husband, and I wasn’t going to accept anymore of her rudeness toward him. She either needed to change her attitude, or she needed to retire.
I tried to stamped down my frustration. I didn’t want to get Rider all worked up about her. I pushed open the door, expecting to find Rider snuggled in the bed. But to my horror, I saw him lying prone on the floor, not moving. Panic slammed through me and I crouched beside him. There was a glass of iced tea spilled on the floor next to him.
“Rider?” My voice shook as I gently rolled him onto his back. His face was ashen, and he was unresponsive. I pulled my cell from my pocket and immediately dialed 911. When the operator came on the line, I explained what was happening, and she told me to stay calm, and that help was on the way. She wanted to keep talking to me, but I didn’t care. I tossed my phone onto the floor, and pulled Rider into my arms, kissing his face. “Rider? Can you hear me?”
He moaned but didn’t open his eyes.
I stroked his hair off his face, feeling terrified. I wasn’t sure if it would be faster for me to drive him to the ER myself, but I didn’t want to make the wrong decision and cost Rider his life. “Baby, open your eyes.” My voice shook, and I kissed his slack mouth. “God, Rider. Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me.”
There was a sound behind me, and when I glanced over my shoulder, Emilia stood there. Her eyes were black and she had a funny smile.
“He passed out,” I said, stroking his cheek. “Go get Mrs. Lane.”
“Mrs. Lane can’t help him.” She sounded matter fact.
“What?” I frowned at her.
“No one can help him.”
I scowled. “Go get Mrs. Lane. What the hell is the matter with you?”
She gave a strangled laugh. “I hope this is painful for him.”
Her cold voice and words sank in as I stared at her. “You did this.” It wasn’t a question.
“This is Thomas’s house. You belong to Thomas.” She pointed at Rider with her eyes frigid. “He didn’t belong here. Things need to go back to the way they were. We need a fresh start.”
“You stupid bitch,” I growled. I wanted to jump up and strangle her, but I didn’t want to leave Rider’s side. “You fucking crazy old bat.”
She widened her eyes. “I did what you were too weak to do!”
I glanced at the spilled tea staining the carpet, and then I thought of the fire. “This isn’t your first try, is it?”
Shrugging, she hissed, “He won’t get out of it this time.”
The sound of an emergency vehicle siren reached my ears. I prayed it wasn’t too late. “You better pray Rider lives, or I’ll personally put you in the ground.”
She recoiled as if shocked at my anger. “I did this for you.”
Behind her there was the heavy stomp of feet coming up the stairs. Two paramedics appeared behind her, and they brushed past her to kneel over Rider.
“She poisoned him,” I said curtly.
“What?” The older paramedic glanced at me in shock.
“She gave him something.” I let go of Rider, and I jumped up and advanced on Emilia. Her eyes widened and she backed up against the wall. “What did you give him?”
“Why do you care?” she wailed. “Let him die, and it can all go back to the way it should be.”
I grabbed her and dug my fingers into her bony arms. “What did you give him?”
Her bottom lip trembled. “He needs to die. Why don’t you understand that?”
I shook her, feeling panicked. “Tell me. What did you give him?” I wanted to bang her head against the wall, but I controlled myself. “Please, Emilia, tell me what you gave him so they can help him.”
“I don’t want to.”
A sob almost tore from my throat, but I managed to stifle it. “Please. I love him. I can’t lose him too.” My voice shook and my eyes stung with unshed tears.
She scrunched her face, and started to cry. “I don’t want to hurt you, but this has to happen.”
“Why? Why don’t you want me happy?”
“But… I do. I do want you happy.” She looked confused, her face wet with tears. “Thomas makes you happy.”
“Thomas is gone,” I hissed. “I love Rider. I need him. Don’t take him away from me, Emilia. I’m begging you.”
She glanced at Rider, and she moaned. “I hate him. I hate him.”
“But you don’t hate me.”
She winced. “No. I… I don’t hate you.”
I leaned toward her, panic shivering through me. “I’m asking you to save him. For me. Please. Please, Emilia.”
“It’s probably too late,” she whispered.
“But maybe it's not. Please, tell me. Tell me what you gave him, so they can save him,” I said hoarsely.
“Meth… Methotrexate.” Her tone was hushed.
The younger paramedic met the gaze of his partner. “Don’t they prescribe that for rheumatoid arthritis?”
“Among other things.” The older man began working on Rider, inserting an IV and rolling him onto his side. “How long has he been like this?”
“I don’t know. Maybe twenty minutes?” I let go of Emilia, and stood uselessly to the side.
Emilia started humming softly under her breath, and I met her befuddled gaze. She seemed out of it, and not sure what was happening. I found it impossible to believe this mumbling, distracted woman was the same person I’d known since I was a child. She’d always just been there, working tirelessly, quietly in the background getting things done. It would never have occurred to me that stoic, unflappable woman would one day lose her mind and try to kill someone I loved.
Sick to my stomach with fear, all I could do was watch as the paramedics worked on Rider. He was so pale, all I could think about was how empty life would be if he died. I could barely breathe just thinking about him dying. Mrs. Lane came into the room at one point looking horrified, and I asked her to call the police so they could come and arrest Emilia for attempted murder.
The paramedics wouldn’t let me ride to the hospital with Rider because his condition was so unstable. I was going to drive myself, but Mrs. Lane took one look at me and she insisted on driving me instead. It was probably a good thing. I was distraught and could easily have ended up wrapped around a telephone pole. Once I got to the ER, they wouldn’t let me see Rider. I was stuck out in the waiting room like everyone else, praying for good news.
Mrs. Lane had to leave at one point, so I called my parents because I couldn’t handle being alone with my terrifying thoughts. Mom rushed into the ER looking pale and shaken. My dad was more reserved seeming, his mouth a grim line, but he kept squeezing my shoulder every few minutes. Hours passed and there was no news. I sat in silence with Mom holding my hand, telling me to think positive thoughts. I wanted to do that. I wanted to believe that the universe wouldn’t be cruel enough to rip Rider away from me. But I was so scared it was almost impossible to believe things would be okay. To have found Rider after decades of being alone and heartbroken, had given me a glimpse of a happy life. But now I felt cursed and hopeless. I didn’t want to live if Rider was gone. I couldn’t see any point in going on. If this was how life was, finding love and then losing it, what was the fucking point? I wanted to scream with rage. I wanted to punch something, or someone. I just wanted to disappear, so I didn’t have to hear the bad news I feared was coming. But instead I sat in the waiting room, praying for a miracle I didn’t believe I’d get.
By the time the exhausted looking doctor came to talk to me, I was so frazzled I was on the verge of crying. I tried to read his expression, but there was no information there for me. He stopped in front of me, and I stood on shaking legs, wanting to cover my ears and run. He blew out a long breath and he said, “Rider’s going to be okay.”
His words almost didn’t register, and then hot tears started rolling down my cheeks. I couldn’t speak, the lump in my throat was too big, but my mom gripped my arm, and spoke to the doctor for me. I barely registered their words because all that kept rolling around in my head was “Rider’s going to be okay.” Over and over, that sentence circled my brain, slowly breathing life back into my tattered soul.
The doctor patted my back, his eyes kind. “Time was on our side. Another hour and this might be a different outcome. But Rider should make a full recovery.”
“And… and the baby?” My voice shook.
“I believe the baby is okay. We’ll know more later in the pregnancy, but Rider hasn’t miscarried, so I have hope.”
My legs gave out, and I sank back onto my seat. I almost couldn’t believe his words. “Can I see him?”
“Soon. Give us some time to move him to a room.” The doctor shook his head. “Somebody upstairs must like you, Jax. This is a bit of a miracle.”
I nodded, feeling numb.
Once he’d gone, my mom and dad hugged me, and each other. I still felt uneasy because the last I’d seen of Rider he’d been almost blue and lifeless. I was afraid to trust he’d be okay until I could touch him and talk to him. When they finally said we could see him, they’d only let one of us go in at a time. I followed the nurse down the brightly lit hallways, my heart pounding. She led me to a private room, and I found Rider lying in the bed with IV’s and sensors attached to his arms.
He opened his eyes the minute I entered the room, almost as if he sensed my presence. His cheeks were pink, but he had lines under his eyes. He held out his hand, and I rushed to him, grabbing his hand in mine. His skin was warm, and reassuring. “I was so scared,” I said quietly.
“What happened?” He looked confused, and his voice was faint. “I drank the tea Mrs. Lane left in my room, and the next thing I knew I was in agony and on the floor.”
It hadn’t occurred to me he had no idea what had Emilia had done. I winced. “Well, Emilia, she… she tried to poison you.”
He widened his eyes. “What?” His voice was almost a whisper.
“She put something in your drink.” I squeezed his hand. “She’s already confessed.”
“But… why?” He wrinkled his forehead.
“She wanted it to go back to how it was before you arrived.” I let go of his hand so I could lower the railing. Then I perched on the edge of his bed, and reclaimed his hand. “She tried to poison you once before.”
He stared at me as if he couldn’t believe his ears. “When?”
“That night you were so sick.”
“She… she did that to me?”
“Yes. She confessed to all of this.”
Shock radiated across his weary features. “Jesus.”
“This time she gave you more. She wanted to be sure you and the baby didn’t make it.” I scowled. “But I quit work early, and I found you sooner than she’d planned.”
He blanched, looking shaken.
“The fire. That was her too. She took the candle you lit and started the fire. She said she wedged a piece of wood in the door frame to jam it closed. I didn’t see it, so I don’t know if it burned or what, but because I didn’t see it, I didn’t suspect anything.”
“Of course we didn’t suspect anything. Why would we?”
“I knew she was acting weird, but this level of malevolence never occurred to me.”
“I can hardly take this all in.” His lips parted, and he looked bewildered. “Killing me wouldn’t bring Thomas back.”
“She’s insane. She’s lost her mind.” I swallowed hard, and leaned in to kiss him.
His lips were soft, and when the kiss ended, his expression was vulnerable. “I knew she didn’t like me but…”
“Yeah.” I kissed his hand. “God, I’m so sorry.”
“You’re sorry?” He looked muddled.
“It’s because of me she was able to hurt you.” I bit my lip. “I grieved for Thomas for so long, I fed her obsession.”
“Still, it’s not your fault she’s nuts.”
“I guess not, but I feel responsible.”
“No. That’s not logical.”
“I was so close to losing you… and the baby.”
“I know.” He touched his stomach. “The doctors think the baby is okay.”
“Yes.” I hardened my jaw. “We’ll know for sure later.”
His mouth turned down at the corners. “God, how could she hurt a baby?”
“It was all about her pain. I can’t believe she’s the same woman I’ve known my whole life.” I shivered at the memory of her cold eyes and chilling confession.
“It’s okay.” His voice was soft and he squeezed my fingers.
My eyes stung as I took in his fragile appearance. “Yeah, amazingly enough, it is.”
“She didn’t win.”
“No. She didn’t.” I sighed. “I can’t wait to get you home so I can hold you in my arms.”
His gaze warmed, and he scooted slowly to the side of his bed with a grunt. “Get up here.”
I laughed. “What?”
He patted his chest weakly. “Come cuddle me.”
I glanced at the door. “But, I don’t think that’s allowed.”
“You’re Jax Hamilton. Do you mean to tell me you’re afraid of a little ol’ nurse?”
I bit my lip. “There’s not much room.”
“There’s enough.”
After giving one more uneasy glance toward the doorway, I crawled clumsily onto the small bed. I had to watch out for all the wires attached to his arm, but somehow I managed to slide in beside him.
He folded into my side, resting his head on my shoulder. “Awww, yeah. This is better,” he whispered.
I kissed his head, inhaling his shampoo scented hair. “Don’t ever scare me like that again.”
“I’ll do my best.” He sighed. “I like the sound of your heartbeat under my ear.” He sounded drowsy. “It’s soothing.”
“Go to sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”