I don't really breathe until I'm parked in front of Lacey's building. I'm late. I have enough time to do all this before the funeral, but I'm cutting it close.

My next breath is just as shallow. This must be what stage fright feels like for everyone else. My body is buzzing with nervous energy. My stomach is light. My entire fucking head is light.

A breeze could blow me away.

I force myself to take a slow inhale as I step out of the car. Then it's a slow exhale.

This is a time for a fucking declaration in the sky, but all I have is myself. My words. My body. My heart.

That has to be enough.

I trip over the first stair. And the fourth. It's not like me. Even though all that heavy shit is hanging high in the sky, I don't feel weighed down. It hurts that Mom is gone, that she chose not to spend more time with us.

It hurts that Dad is falling apart.

That he's still leaving to finish Mom's work.

But there's a lightness to letting go of that particular flavor of I need my family together. The Strong family hasn't included Mom and Dad for a long time. This is a shit way for it to happen, but I'm glad I'm finally over the idea of the family being anything but me, Piper, and Ethan.

With Kit, Joel, Violet, and even Bella, and maybe Lacey… we have all the family anyone could ever want.

There. Both feet plant on the balcony. It's a few steps to Lacey's door. I take a deep breath then exhale slowly. This is terrifying, but I'm not running from terrifying anymore.

I knock on her door.

"Coming." There's a sound of someone standing. Kicking stuff back in place. Lacey pulls the door open. She stands there in the frame looking up at me. "Mal?"

"Yeah."

"I thought Kit and Piper were picking me up on their way."

"Someone must have asked them not to."

Her lip corner turns up on one side. "Someone…"

"I want to show you something." Two things, actually, but they're at the same place.

"I've already seen you naked."

"You wouldn't want to see it again."

She presses her lips together. Her brown eyes fix on mine. She looks tired. Hurt.

She's been crying. Over me. Because of me. It guts me knowing I'm the one causing her all that pain, but I get it now. That's what happens when you let yourself love someone.

You give them the power to hurt you.

"Mal, I… I don't know." She hugs her chest. "Is it something important?"

"Yeah."

Her fingers brush the sleeves of her black dress. This is a hell of a time to appeal to her feelings for me, but I can't afford to play fair. I need her coming with me.

I need her.

"You trust me?" I ask.

She nods but her expression screams I haven't forgotten how you hurt me.

"Give me one hour."

"Isn't the funeral in an hour?"

"It's at three. We have time." I offer her my hand.

"Time for…"

"For this."

She looks up at me. Something sparks in her eyes, like she believes there's a chance. "Do you really need to be this oblique?"

"Yeah."

"Bullshit."

"Maybe. But I want it to be a surprise."

She takes my hand. "Okay, but if it's not a surprise—"

"You want a lunch full of carbs?"

"I was going to say I want the ten orgasms Ethan promised, but I guess I'll settle for lunch."

Her touch lights up my body. It pushes away the storm clouds in my mind.

It makes it feel like this is fucking possible.

Like anything is possible.

* * *

With anticipation eating at my insides, it feels like the drive takes a million years. The entire time Lacey's hand stays glued to mine. She sits back in the passenger seat, her eyes flitting from me to the scenery.

Our surroundings give nothing away. We're in front of an unassuming West LA office building. It's a beautiful day. The blue sky is shining high. The air is moving with a light breeze, carrying the hum of traffic on the nearby freeways.

And Lacey is sitting next to me, her brown eyes filled with curiosity, her lips in a tiny hint of a smile.

I park in the lot and turn the car off. Lacey looks around as she slides out of the car. She takes an unsteady step. She's wearing those black heels. They do amazing things to her long legs, but she can't walk for shit in them.

I slide my arm around her waist and guide her to the office complex. She watches with rapt attention as I pull out the key to the suite and unlock the door.

There. We're on the left.

It's another lock.

I turn the handle and hold the door open for her. "After you?"

"Let me guess. You're surprising me by doing my taxes?" She looks up at me. "You do know it's September."

"I do."

"Okay, so it's not taxes. General accounting?"

"Go inside."

She turns to the room and takes a step inside.

Her eyes go wide.

A sigh falls off her lips. "No fucking way." She practically jumps into the Herman Miller chair.

She runs her fingers over the desk and stares at every piece of machinery.

This is a hell of an editing suite. At least that's what the guy who owns the place claimed. I asked around, and everyone agreed—this is as good as any editing suite gets.

Lacey spins in her chair. Once she's slowed, she pulls her knees into her chest and looks up at me. "This is an office."

"An editing suite."

"I can't take an editing suite."

"It's yours for six months. If you don't want it, don't use it."

She turns back to the computer. A whine of a sigh falls off her lips. She can't stand the thought of not using it.

She needs one more push.

"It would be a shame for all this equipment to go to waste," I say.

"True. But… Mal, I know how much this place must cost. I can't—"

"It's done."

She looks up at me. "You, um… you rented me an office for half a year?"

I nod.

"Because…"

"I want to see you blossom."

"But, we're… are you… does this mean…"

"Let me talk for a minute?"

"A whole minute? Are you capable?"

I laugh.

"That's an entire sixty seconds."

"Only if you stop talking."

"That seems unlikely. You're going to have to power through my blabbering. You did buy me an office. That's not exactly chocolate and roses."

"Do you even like chocolate?"

"Who doesn't?"

"Roses?"

"Ditto."

"Should I run out and get some?"

She shakes her head. "No. I… Okay. I think I've only got sixty seconds of silence in me right now."

My lips curl into a smile. "I know." I move to the spot in front of her chair and lower myself onto my knees.

I need to look up at her when I say this. I need to show her that she's the one with my heart in my hands.

That I'm okay being at her mercy.

I stare into her brown eyes. "I love you, Lacey."

Her eyes go wide. She stares back at me, her mouth agape, her entire body turned towards mine. "You love me?"

"Yeah. I did the other day. When I asked you to leave. I knew it as soon as you walked out the door, but I kept trying to convince myself it was something else." I pull my t-shirt down my chest, low enough to show off my fresh ink.

"Mal…"

"Sixty seconds," I remind her.

She shakes her head. "Mal… That's…"

"Your name."

"It is?"

I nod.

She drags her fingertips over my chest, tracing the outlines of the tattoo. It's only a day old. It's still sore. But it's fucking perfect—a broken heart being stitched together, her name on the needle.

"That's forever."

"Yeah."

"What if I tell you to get lost? That I don't forgive you for hurting me?"

"You'll still be the person who stitched my heart back together."

"Then tore it apart?"

"Yeah."

She traces the lines again and again. Slowly, her eyes meet mine. "Mal, I can't do this again. Not if you're going to run off the next time you get scared."

"I know. I fucking hate that I hurt you, Lacey. It's been eating me up inside. But knowing that you exist and you're okay… You've been my silver lining since everything with Mom started." I slide my arms around her waist. "I'm sorry it took me so long to get this figured out. I love you, and that means I'm handing you my heart, and that means you have the power to destroy me."

"I won't."

"I know. But I get it now. All that warmth in my chest, that feeling lighting up my entire body—that's love. It always comes with giving someone the power to tear you in half. It means you trust them not to."

She blinks back a tear. "Mal…"

"You're crying, baby."

She shakes her head.

I reach up and wipe a tear from her eye. "You are."

"I'm happy."

I wipe another tear from her eye. "I love you so much, Lacey."

"I love you too." She stares back at me. "You're not scared anymore?"

"I'm terrified. But I'm getting there."

She nods. "You promise you won't run off?"

"Yeah."

"Swear on something."

"I swear on everything."

"Something specific."

I plant a kiss on the inside of her knee. "I swear on my desire to make you come."

She laughs. Her hands go to her eyes. She wipes away the happy tears. "I can't lose that."

"You won't." I plant another kiss on her soft skin. "Let me prove it to you."

Her lips curl into a smile. "I can live with that."

I slide my arms to her ass and pull her to the edge of the chair. She lifts her hips and pushes her panties to her knees.

I slide them off, one foot at a time.

Lacey is already melting under my touch. She's already soft and pliable.

She's already mine, but I need to feel it everywhere.

She leans back as she spreads her legs.

I push her dress to her waist and I drag my lips up her thigh. I don't have it in me to tease today. I bring my hand to her ass and I hold her in place while I taste every inch of her.

She squirms in my hands, pressing her thighs against my cheeks as she groans my name.

She tugs at my hair. "Mal… Please…"

I hold her in place and I lick her just how she needs me to. Each flick of my tongue makes her shudder. Each gets her groaning louder. Each gets her tugging at my hair like it's the only way she can take it.

She shifts her hips.

Her thighs shake.

She's almost there.

I look up to watch the pleasure spread over her face.

One more.

There.

"Fuck, Mal." She groans my name again and again as she comes on my face.

I hold her shaking thighs in place as I lick her through her orgasm. It feels so fucking right, Lacey trusting me with her body.

This is more intimate than any sex we've ever had.

Now, she's really mine.

And I'm really hers.

She tugs at my hair, pulling me from between her legs. "Sex. Couch. Now."

I push myself to my feet. Then her. I undo my jeans and step out of them. Then the boxers.

Lacey pulls my t-shirt over my head.

She kicks off her shoes.

I do the same with mine.

My arms slide to her ass. I lift her and set her on the couch under me. It's messy. Our foreheads bump together. Then our noses.

Then my lips are on hers and everything else is fading away.

She tastes so fucking good.

I spread her legs and bring her body onto mine.

She shudders as my tip strains against her.

One delicious inch at a time, I enter her.

We both sigh loudly enough to get the sound echoing around the room. This is where we belong. Together. As one. Holding each other up. Helping each other face the world.

She tugs at my hair as she kisses back.

She rakes her nails across my back.

She arches her hips, moving with me, pushing me deeper.

She groans against my lips.

I get lost in the movements of her body. In the sounds of her pleasure. In the feeling of driving into her.

Being one with her.

We stay locked like that until she's there. She breaks our kiss to stare into my eyes.

Then her eyelids flutter together.

Her lips part with a sigh of pleasure.

And she moans my name again and again as she comes.

Fuck, I love the way she pulses around me. The way she sighs with ecstasy. The way she digs her nails into my skin.

Watching her come pushes me over the edge. A few more thrusts and I'm there. I groan her name, tugging at her hair as I rock through my orgasm.

I wait until I've spilled every drop to untangle our bodies.

I shift next to her, on one elbow. It's cozy, both of us on the couch, a sticky mess, but it's perfect.

She looks up at me with all the love in the world. "You got my office messy."

My lips curl into a smile. "I'll have it cleaned."

She traces the lines of my tattoo. "You promise?"

"I promise everything."