Ethan

Except for the low hum of the fan, the apartment is silent.

Vi must be asleep.

It's nearly four a.m. Of course she's asleep.

Even though my entire body is begging me to wake her, I stay quiet as I make my way to our bedroom.

She's lying on top of the black comforter, in some gorgeous see through bra and panty set. Her kindle is resting on her chest. Her eyes and lips are dark with makeup.

It's not exactly unusual seeing Violet asleep in a full face of makeup, but this—

She was waiting up for me.

My chest warms. I'm so fucking lucky to have her. I need to have her right away. Well, as soon as she's awake.

I can wait until morning to fuck her.

But I can't wait another fucking minute to get my arms around her. I strip to my boxers then I climb into bed behind Violet.

She stirs. Her lips part with a soft sigh.

"Ethan," she murmurs. "Is that you?"

"Yeah." I place my body behind hers, my crotch against her ass, my chest against her back. "Go back to sleep, honey."

She shakes her head and nestles into my body.

Fuck, she feels good. Warm. Soft. Mine.

"I should shower." It's an empty threat. There isn't a single part of me that wants to be somewhere else.

"No." She reaches back to grab my wrist then she's pulling my hand over her waist. "You should stay here. Forever."

"Forever?"

"Mhmm."

"What about breakfast?"

"Overrated."

"What if I'm going to make you a dozen matcha lattes?"

"Hmmm." Her voice is a soft mumble. She's still half asleep. "Maybe for two dozen-"

I pull her closer. "That can be arranged."

She murmurs a yes. Her chest rises with her inhale and falls with her exhale. Her eyelids stay pressed together.

Fuck, it's adorable watching her try to stay awake.

"I…" She talks through a yawn. "I was waiting up."

I trace the outline of her sheer black bra. "I can see that."

"Oh. Yeah. It's new. I, um… Do you like it?" She turns so we're face to face. There's a nervousness in her eyes.

It's hard to believe that Vi gets nervous about anyone's opinion, especially mine, especially after all this time. We've been living together a year now.

We've been engaged for months.

Fuck, we're getting married in three fucking days.

And she's nervous I won't like the scraps of fabric barely covering her tits and ass.

God damn, I can't stop staring. The sheer fabric does nothing to hide her hard nipples. And there's this corset lacing between her breasts.

My fingers tug the lacing undone. "I fucking love it." I can't help myself. I push the straps off her shoulders one at a time. "But I still need to get rid of it."

Okay, I can't wait to have her.

Not another fucking minute.

"Ethan…" She arches her back, pressing her crotch against mine.

Fuck, those panties are just as sheer. They have that same lacing going over her hip.

There's barely any fabric between my cock and her cunt.

My hands are greedy. One undoes the lacing of her bra and tosses the garment aside.

The other goes to her ass, and pulls her crotch into mine.

She groans as she rubs herself against my hard-on. "I missed you."

"I missed you too." I cup her breast and play with her nipple with my thumb. Thoughts flee my brain at an alarming rate. I need to get this out now, before the only thing I can do is demand her orgasm. "Fuck, Vi…"

Fuck. Too late.

I let my eyelids flutter closed and I bring my lips to hers.

She tugs at my hair as she slides her tongue into my mouth. Her kiss is hard and hungry. Every bit of her need pours into me.

Ten fucking days.

How was this only ten fucking days…

It felt like an eternity.

And in another ten fucking days, we have to do this all over again.

I'm asking her to squeeze our wedding and honeymoon into a break in our tour schedule.

That's not it, not exactly. There are all sorta of venue details that are way too fuzzy with my cock this hard—

There are life details too.

After everything with Mom, we wanted to do it fast.

Carpe diem. Memento mori. All that fucking shit.

But still.

Ten fucking days.

Then we're apart again.

And again.

It goes on for fucking ever.

Violet groans as she pulls back. "Did I already say I missed you?"

"Yeah."

"I really did." She pushes my boxers off my hips. "Tell me it gets easier."

"It doesn't."

"I know. Tell me anyway."

"You know I can't lie to you."

"Tell me something good."

"I love you."

"I love you too." She presses her palm flat against my stomach. "God, Ethan…" Her eyelids flutter closed.

She leans in and kisses me, hard.

Then she's wrapping her hand around my cock.

Fuck—

Need pours from her lips to mine.

From my lips to hers.

I can't explain this. I can't put it into words. At the moment, it's a struggle finding any coherent words.

I love Vi more than anything.

More than the band.

More than touring.

More than fucking music.

She'd never ask me to give it up.

Which is good. Cause I'm not sure I could fucking do it.

And here we are, three days from getting married, and she's dealing with the weight of that on her own.

She deserves more than that.

She deserves fucking everything.

But, fuck, I need her.

And right now—

She groans into my mouth.

She rubs my tip with her thumb.

I push her panties off her hips, then help her get them off her feet.

We're naked in our bed in our apartment. This is our fucking life, and it's a good fucking life.

But I still have to ask myself—

Fuck.

That last coherent thought leaves my brain as she climbs on top of me. She straddles me and presses her palms against my shoulders.

Slowly, she lowers her body onto mine.

My cock strains against her.

Then it's one delicious inch at a time.

"Vi…"

"Fuck, Ethan…" Her green eyes are heavy with desire.

She rocks her hips against me. The friction is fucking divine, and she feels so fucking good.

Knowing that I'm bringing her all that pleasure…

That it's our bodies joining…

God damn, I'm so fucking cheesy now.

But I don't care.

I bring one hand to her hair and pull her into a deep, slow kiss.

I bring the other to her hips and use it to guide her.

And we stay locked like that, bodies moving together, tongues dancing, all that need and affection pouring between us.

We stay locked together as she comes on my cock.

As her cunt pulses around me.

As her groans vibrate over my skin, all the way to my fingers and toes.

I flip her over and pin her to the bed.

She wraps her legs around my hips and pulls my body into hers.

She tugs at my hair.

It's like she can't take a single hint of space between us.

Fuck knows I can't.

I thrust into her with soft, slow strokes until I'm there.

I groan against her lips, tugging at her hair as I come.

My cock pulses. Pleasure spreads out to my fingers and toes.

Once I've spilled every drop, I collapse next to her.

We're both a sweaty, stick mess.

But she still nestles into my body.

She still falls asleep in my arms.

* * *

In the morning, we shower together. We stay in the tiny space until we're prunes. I can't get enough of her body against mine. Of her groans. Of her nails on my skin, my hands in her hair, my teeth on her neck.

I can't get enough of her. Period.

Reality is right outside the door. We’re about to get married, and the thought of a single one of her relatives watching me walk down the aisle, that why isn't she marrying a nice, stable guy look on their faces makes my stomach tie up in knots.

I know I want to be with Violet forever. I knew that when I marked my body for her.

Usually, I'm good with an audience…

But not that audience.

It's terrifying.

I want my thoughts gone.

I want the world making sense, the way it does when it's just our bodies aligned.

I make Violet come until she's begging me to stop.

We get out of the shower and wrap ourselves in towels. Violet goes to get dressed. I fix scrambled eggs with avocado, coffee for me, a matcha latte for her.

She steps out of our bedroom in a tight black dress and patterned black tights. She's already all made up, her hair in that perfect straight line.

"Your mom coming today?" I ask.

"Not until our hair and makeup run through. She has work." Her eyes fix on me. "Can I convince you to adopt this wardrobe permanently?"

"You know how to persuade me."

She makes a show of checking out my bare torso as I bring our breakfast to the table.

Her lips curl into a smile as her eyes meet mine. She wraps her hand around my wrist and pulls me into a soft, slow kiss.

"How many times have I said 'I really missed you,' now?" she asks.

"I missed you too." I slide into the seat across from hers. There aren't enough words to explain how much I missed Violet, how much I always miss Violet when I'm away.

Her eyes go to the table. She traces the outline of her mug with her pointer finger.

She's thinking something.

Something she doesn't want to say.

She stares at her drink. Then at her twisting amethyst ring.

Slowly, she meets my gaze. "Are you as nervous as I am?"

I nod.

"Good." She brings her mug to her lips and takes a sip. Her eyelids flutter closed as she lets out a soft moan. "Fuck Ethan, you're too good at this."

"Never stop saying that."

Her laugh dissolves the tension in the room. "You didn't get enough positive feedback?" She nods to the master bedroom/bathroom. "I definitely lost track of how many times I said 'Fuck, Ethan.'"

"It was at least a dozen."

"Braggart."

My smile spreads over my cheeks. God, it feels so good sitting across from her at breakfast. It feels so good talking about nothing with Violet.

She takes another long sip of her drink. "Thank you. For breakfast. And this."

"Anytime."

She nods, but there's something in her eyes. It's not anytime. It's anytime I'm here.

Which is barely half the time.

No, I'm projecting. Right now, the only thing in Violet's eyes is satisfaction.

She downs half her drink then moves to her plate of eggs. She chews, swallows, takes another bite, talks with her mouth full. "These too." She swallows. "You're multi-talented, Ethan Strong."

I cock a brow. "Yeah?"

"Well, if you're right about a dozen…" She takes another bite. Her eyes go to the clock on the wall, the one with guitars for numbers. "Fuck, is that right?"

I check the time on the microwave behind us. "Yeah."

"I better hurry." She takes a quick sip. "Are you coming? I know it's not really the most exciting decision in the world, which cake we're getting, but we were supposed to decide two weeks ago."

"You want me there?"

She nods. "Otherwise, it's just me and Piper."

"You sure you want me there? There will be much left for me and you after Piper has her way."

"She's not that bad."

I nod. "She's worse." My little sister has quite the fondness for desserts. And she has quite the affection for Violet. She was over the moon when Violet asked her to be maid of honor.

No doubt, she's been pulling my weight with wedding planning.

Not that it will stop me from teasing her about her sweet tooth.

"How soon do we have to leave?" I ask.

She looks to the clock then back to me. "Twenty minutes."

I nod. "Done."

"I, uh…" Her eyes flare with something I can't place. "I'm going to find my shoes."

I watch her walk away.

Violet has to go through so much of her life alone. Because of me. Because of my choices.

Maybe her family is right. Maybe she deserves some stable guy, an accountant who's by her side night and day.

Maybe she deserves a guy who won't show up late when she's wearing the hottest lingerie in the history of the world.

It's not like I could help the flight delay.

But it's always something.

Violet and I are the same— we love what we do. We need work. It keeps us going.

It's not like before. She does come first. When she needs me, I'm there. Period.

But what if that isn't enough?