Chapter 36
Vanessa
Tuesday
“What do you think about having some chairs over here?” I asked.
Meghan glanced over from setting up her new reception desk, looking over to the space where I was pointing. A thoughtful expression came across her face as she formulated a response, “Yeah, I like that idea a lot. It’s light and open; it doesn’t feel like an uncomfortable waiting room. We should probably get a coffee table, too, and some magazines.”
I nodded, trying to picture the adjustments in my head. “Cool, we’ll have to pick some out them and get them ordered.”
The new office space we had rented still smelled like new paint and was receiving the finishing touches before I opened shop next week. It wasn’t big and fancy as Frank Howell, but I was proud of it. Over the last week, we’d picked out everything from the carpet to the lighting fixtures. I’d spent a lot of time at Home Depot and filling out paperwork to get a business license. When I wasn’t doing that, I was here, trying to ease into the space.
Every now and then I would have these moments where excitement would boil over into a fit of giggles; I couldn’t believe this was happening. I’d been so busy, in fact, that I hadn’t had much time to think about Adam or feel sorry for myself about what happened. At the end of the day though, when it would be quiet, I would miss him.
It ended between us so suddenly, that I never got the closure, or answers, that I needed.
Meghan sighed, looking out across the lobby with a quizzical expression. Her eyes rested on the blank walls, contemplating what to do with them. I came up beside her and shoved my hands into my pockets asking, “What are you thinking?”
Her lips pursed together into a line like she had tasted something bitter. “I’m thinking we need to get some artwork to hang in here. Maybe we could blow up some of your pictures and frame them; that would be cool.”
I nodded in agreement. “We should probably display a price list, too; that could be useful. How about the reception desk over here; do you need anything else?”
She shook her head. “No, I’ve got everything I need. It’s all down to ambiance at this point. It’s clean and professional, but still kinda feels like a stuffy office building.”
“I agree. Should we make a trip to the store and get some accents?”
She nodded. “I think that might be a good idea, just to make the space feel more welcoming.”
We started tossing around ideas of ways to decorate when I saw Max’s car pull up in the parking lot outside. His distinctive dirty blond hair poked out of the driver’s side door as he locked up and started coming toward the entrance.
It was the first time I had seen him in weeks. The last time we spoke was briefly on his way out the door with Adam to their Men’s Club meeting. Before that, it had been pretty spacey, both of us involved with other things.
Meghan followed my gaze and scoffed. “What is your brother doing here?”
I shrugged, waving at him through the glass door and said, “I don’t know.”
I wished I did; there were a lot of complicated emotions about seeing him, knowing that he and Adam were still friends. Truthfully, I didn’t even know how he knew that we were here; Mom or Dad must have given him the address without me knowing.
Max came strolling in from outside and met me with a smile in the doorway. “Wow, this place looks great,” he complimented.
“Hey, Max,” I told him with a smile. “Nice of you to stop by.”
He gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek, saying, “Of course! I had to see what all the hubbub was about and what you girls are up to.”
I grinned. “Well, what do you think?”
He glanced around the lobby and smiled. “I think it looks great. You’re definitely pulling it off, sis. I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks! Do you want to see my new business cards that Dad designed for me?”
“Sure.”
I skipped over to the reception desk and pulled one out of the holder, handing it to him. It had clean black lettering and a metallic finish that made our logo pop; I was very proud of it. “See, it’s got my name and phone number, the address here…”
“Yeah, everything looks great,” he agreed.
I grinned, folding my arms in front of my chest so that I looked professional and serious while smiling at him goofily. “I even have flyers and some fancy pens, so you know I mean business.”
He laughed indulgently, brushing his hand against the wooden finish of the reception desk and admiring the subtle changes we had made. “Do you want to give me a tour around back?”
“Sure.”
I led him through the back office, black room, and studio, showing him how everything was laid out exactly the way I wanted it. He nodded encouragingly as we talked about what my plans from this point onward now that I actually had a business to work from. We made it all the way back around front and sat down in the lobby.
“You know, Adam misses you,” he told me suddenly.
I turned to him surprised and asked, “What?”
“Adam. He misses you,” Max repeated, looking back at me in earnest. “He told me so the other day.”
My cheeks felt hot, and I looked away from him in embarrassment. It felt weird talking to my brother about this; he and Adam were friends, and they had been for a long time. Still, I couldn’t help but feel betrayed, even though I had no right to be so. It was a difficult situation for him to being in choosing sides. “I don’t know why you’re friend with him; that guy’s a jerk.”
Max sighed, putting his hands up on the armrest and said, “He’s not a jerk—”
“He kicked me out, Max! For no good reason, I might add. I don’t want to play mind games and go back and forth while he figures all this out. I want stability,” I choked out sadly. “I thought we had it.”
“Adam didn’t really have a choice,” he informed me slowly, choosing his words as carefully as he could. “He was trying to protect you.”
Something in his tone caught my attention, and I turned to him for clarification. “Protect me? Protect me from what?”
“Someone broke into the apartment when you weren’t there; that’s who left the flowers. They threatened to hurt you if Adam didn’t play ball and do what they were asking.”
“Wait, what?”
“One of the guys he was prosecuting threatened to hurt you if Adam wouldn’t help him stay out of jail. He’s too much of a pussy to tell you what was going on, but he also didn’t want the guy to get off without fair jail time.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying Adam still wants to be with you, he always did. Life just sucks sometimes and you gotta roll with it. I think you should go to him and talk about it.”
“What about the guy?”
Max smiled, giving me a little wink and gesturing a sense of closure. “The trial’s over; there’s nothing keeping him away now. Adam’s just too chicken shit to come back and tell you about what happened.”
“Oh my God…”
Meghan was listening to our conversation wide-eyed. “Vanessa, you have to go to him!”
“We were about to go to the store…” I argued feebly.
“I can take care of that myself!” she laughed in exuberance.
I exhaled a laugh, looking back at both of them. “What time is it?”
“It was a little after five when I got here,” Max responded with a smile.
Meghan nodded eagerly. “Go! I can finish up here; we’ll get together in the morning and talk it out. Go and figure things out with Adam and made sense out of everything.”
With a laugh, I grabbed my purse and went running out the door. I couldn’t get in the driver’s seat fast enough. If what Max was saying was true, then I wanted to see Adam as soon as possible. I wanted to kiss him; I wanted to punch him; I wanted to roll around naked with him in his sheets until we were both too exhausted to move.
It gave me back the hope that I thought was lost, Adam still wanting me. Why would he just push me away like that instead of telling me what happened?
Stupid, stubborn ass.
As I was driving toward his condo, my mind went over a hundred different scenarios of what could happen when I got there. It couldn’t be one of those situations where I fell into his arms and we declared our love for each other; those sorts of things don’t happen. What I did want to happen was to talk things out with him for real and see if there was any chance for us in the future.
I pulled into the parking lot outside and put the car in park, briefly making an assessment of my appearance before going to the door. My hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail, and I had little to no makeup on. In an attempt to bring some color to my cheeks, I pinched them hard to get blood flowing near the surface.
Shit, I’ve been at work all day. I probably look awful.
That was just my luck. I never ran into someone that I wanted to impress when I actually looked good. I sighed, climbing out of the driver’s seat and slowly walking toward the door.
My heart was pounding in my chest as I stood on the step outside and knocked on Adam’s door. It seemed to echo in the late afternoon air, and I felt my nerves come alive. My palms were getting sweaty, and I was breathing heavily through my nose, knowing that he was just behind on the other side of the door.
All the things he said when he was telling me to leave felt too real; it broke my heart to think that maybe he had meant them. Would he want to see me again? I had no idea what his reaction would be after the abrupt end to our…whatever it was. I didn’t want him to think I was crawling back to him, begging him to give us another chance, like some hopeless romantic. I just wanted answers, and after everything we’d been through, I felt like I deserved it.
What is Max was lying? What if he was just trying to be helpful and wildly optimistic? I thought to myself nervously.
For a second, I thought about turning around and walking away, acting like this never happened to hide my shame.
Behind the door, I could hear movement as he undid the locks and then the door swung open.