Shep

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“I can’t fucking believe I was so stupid. I let my dick do the thinking.”

I was stalking in the kitchen, with Axle and Kade putting a buffer between me and any sharp objects that might be in reach.

“Go in there, talk like we do in meetings,” I told Kade.

JJ had already admitted she was a goddamn rat, but I wanted to hear the rest of it. I wanted to see if you could hear everything from the kitchen.

“Hey! Axle, Shep, this is my normal voice.”

“FUCK!”

We could hear Kade perfectly with him in Church and us in the kitchen.

“Look, you need to get your shit together. We got two Great Wolves out there. We have half the plan done. You look insane. If you want this to work, we go out there and make a deal with them.”

Axle was right. I had to get it together. I wanted to chase after JJ and at the same time I also never wanted to fucking see her again. I had rage, and hurt, and it had to go somewhere. But it had to be later.

“Shep, you listening? Put it away for a minute until we get the Great Wolves in place and until we here from Benz. We didn’t come this far with this plan to give up now.”

I took a breath. My head was pounding. My heart – well, it must have been what a heart attack felt like.

Axle was right. I had to get my shit together. Now. I had to do what Mama Bear told me. I had to think about the MC first and then my personal bullshit. Even though my personal bullshit had nearly brought this club down.

I ran my hand through my hair. I took another breath.

“Right, right.”

I was doing my best to calm the fuck down. Kade came back in the kitchen to find us.

“Hey, Benz is here, let’s go,” Kade said.

“I know this hurts brother, but let’s deal with it after,” Axle said, and he was right. He was right. I needed to be Bear right now, not some fucking son of.

“I’m fine. Tell Deacon to bring the Wolves into Church, Kade.”

“We might not know about why JJ—” Kade began.

“—Forget it. That’s a problem for after we get this problem done. And it’s mine to deal with.”

I pushed down every shitty emotion that I felt about JJ. I would have to look at it later. I would have to harden myself about just how easily I’d let a pretty girl into the heart of my club. But I’d already let them down once today. I needed to stop the fucking bleeding.

I had planned to keep Bear’s chair open but when I walked into Church, Deacon gestured to it. I didn’t deserve to sit in Bear’s chair. But that wasn’t the fucking point.

The point was to show the Great Wolves that we were worthy of the deal we’d just fucking put in place with them.

Benz was already there. I may be sitting in the chair right now, but I was not going to pound the gavel. The Great Wolves may be our allies right now but they weren’t Saints. Only Saints could be in an official meeting.

“Benz, you want to tell us what’s up?” I said.

“Gun and Hammer split with The Hawks, as arranged, and let them know where they’d secured another vehicle to transfer the stolen cargo.”

The two Great Wolves nodded and acknowledged their part in tonight’s plan.

“The authorities were tipped off about the entire thing. In fact, Sebastian Wright, our favorite ATF agent, was practically drooling. According to my source, over a dozen Hawks were intercepted by the ATF at the county line. The truck, as you know, was full.”

That was good, that was exactly to plan.

“And based on a tip—” Benz looked at the Great Wolves and we all knew this was their doing too “—They’ve seen exactly what the Hawks were hiding and where. Another thirteen Hawks were busted just outside of the county with guns, more illegal contraband, and underage girls. I heard from my source that they’ll probably also get popped for sex trafficking when all the charges are filed.”

“In one sweep, we got rid of our bird problem,” Axle said.

“Yes, except Moss. He ran when the ATF stopped the truck. So he’s out there. But we’ve cut out his support. He’s powerless.”

I turned to the Great Wolves.

“Thank you. I hope this works toward building a new partnership.”

“When Bear called, we couldn’t say no. He has a lot of respect in a lot of our chapters.”

“We’re going to collect, soon, if that works for you,” Hammer said.

“With a gym near the downtown? Yes, here’s the deed.”

We’d signed over a huge warehouse property that Bo had renovated. The Great Wolves were mostly legit and one of their businesses was MMA gyms. To make The Wolves’ help worthwhile, The Saints had voted to open Port Az, for the first time, to another MC.

The Wolves would open a gym, train fighters, and nothing more, unless agreed upon by the Saints. In return, they strung The Hawks along, made them think we were cornered, and helped us put a noose around their necks.

“If we hear rumblings from other Hawk Chapters, remember, the Great Wolves have your back. This town draws a lot of interest. It’s a pretty nice setup.”

“It is. I think this is a great beginning between our two MCs.”

I stood up and we all shook hands and bumped shoulders.

“Whatever you need for the trail. Gas? Food?” I said.

“We’re good. We’re going to say hey to Bear before we leave. We’ll let you all finish your meeting,” Gun said, and he and Hammer walked out, leaving the core ten of us.

“Shit, we did it,” Maddox said, and he pounded the table.

“We fucking did, goddamn Hawks. I had the DiSalvo’s locked and loaded and we didn’t even NEED my damned in-laws. Thank god,” Zig said.

My brothers congratulated each other. They congratulated me. I put on a brave face. It was true: thanks to Bear’s contacts and good reputation we’d been able to forge an alliance with the Great Wolves and set a bird trap.

It was good to know that the immediate incursion was over. We’d spent a lot of coin getting the drugs but not only were they out of The Hawks’ hands; they were off the streets thanks to the Great Wolves tipping off the ATF. We knew no one in the ATF would believe it if a Saint played canary. That was another reason the Wolves were the perfect partners.

And the world was getting smaller. We had to accept that. We’d need the Great Wolves to keep an eye out if we were going to fend off more attacks from The Hawks, or the Cartel, or whoever the fuck wanted to mess with Port Az.

I stood up from Church and walked out to the MC.

My brothers were cracking open beers and starting to throw back shots. They were calling their old ladies and arranging to get them back into town. It was good. It was…

“Ow!”

There was a crack to the back of my head.

“What the fuck did you say to JJ?”

“Mom, Jesus. I know you liked her. But she admitted she’s A.J. Moss’s fucking niece. She was telling them everything!”

“No shit. I TOLD her to tell them shit. How do you think they knew where you were headed with that truck? SOMEONE had to let them know. And she was the perfect person for that.”

“She’s a liar.”

“She’s the best thing, that ever happened to this family, well, other than me. And you better damn well go tell her that and thank her for putting herself in danger for this club.”

I tried to let it all sink in. JJ, my Mom, and the words I said to her.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“If you haven’t blown this, she’ll tell you all about it herself. But her Uncle put her in prison and he got her out. She had no choice and she still chose us, the MC.”

“What?”

“You know that shiner she had? It was because she didn’t tell The Hawks about the raid.”

It was almost too much to process. I thought she was the traitor, but it was me. I’d fucking bailed at the first sign of trouble without listening to her.

“If I were you, I’d head to the bus stop and be quick about it.”

“You shouldn’t have kept this from me, you should have told me. She should have told me.”

“I told her to stay out of the way tonight, to protect her while it all went down. I thought we’d all talk it out in the morning. Plus I figured you’d believe her over any lowlife Hawk who happened to recognize her.”

“I need to find her.”

“Yeah, you do.”

I was pretty sure there was no going back with JJ. But I had to try. I found my bike and gunned it.

The bus stop was my only lead.