Chapter Twenty-one: Jinxed

Nathaniel

 

 

I follow Harmony through a whirlwind of nonsense. One landscape blends into another and scene after scene flashes before us. China is crowded. A street market sells every imaginable vegetable and seafood while eager buyers squawk over prices with the merchants. Then we're traveling again. Our next stop is a cobbled lane lined with stone buildings. The passersby speak German. There’s a medieval castle on a hill above town. Harmony shakes her head and appears disappointed.

She says, “Not here, either.” She lays her hand on my arm and we move through space with only her will power driving us.

“What is this place?” I ask as we stand at the edge of a clearing in the darkest, greenest forest I’ve ever seen. Leafy vines climb the trunks of trees so tall the tops can’t be seen. In the center of the clearing is an odd assortment of booths and wagons. It’s a carnival, but all of the amusements have the appearance of being from another century. There’s nothing modern in sight and it’s captivating, somewhat charming, and not a little bizarre.

“We’re here to find someone,” she says in a hushed tone.

We stay out of sight, which makes me wonder who this group of colorful people are.

“Who is it?”

“You’ll know him when you see him.” She keeps her eyes trained on the miniature carnival twenty-five yards away.

“I’m going back to Jules,” I say. “It’s been fun, but I’ve had enough.”

“Not yet, Nathaniel.” She places her long graceful fingers on my sleeve. “Please, stay.”

“I don’t see the point.” I pull my arm back.

“You will shortly.” She points at a canvas tent and two men standing in front of it.

The strong man. The sign over his booth is a painting of him lifting a man over his head. The man being lifted is also a sword swallower, and apparently a snake charmer, as the painting has a snake on the sword, which is halfway down the horizontal man’s throat. There’s a snake curled around the leg of the strong man as well, slithering up his side.

Then I see him performing. He’s not bench pressing the sword swallowing snake charmer, but he is wrestling a red and black giant of a man. They’re in the open lot next to his tent, wrestling on top of a large rug. The snake charmer is standing at the corner of the booth, an enormous boa constrictor wrapped around his shoulders and both man and snake appear to be eyeballing the competition. The giant wears a black diaper, similar to what a sumo wrestler might wear, and nothing else. His body appears to be painted all over, but since the paint isn’t coming off with the groping of skin, I decide the giant must be tattooed all over with red and black ink. The giant is at least seven or eight inches taller and far wider than the strong man, but he is clearly losing the match.

The strong man is unearthly fast as he grabs the giant’s leg, muscles his shoulder into the man’s solar plexus, and lands on top of him as they crash backward.

“Recognize him?” Harmony asks.

“Never seen him before.”

“Remind you of anyone?”

I keep staring. The strong man attempts to pin the giant’s shoulders, but the giant hasn’t given up yet. He lurches upward and manages to throw our man off, but again, the strong man is too fast for someone his size. He’s a blur as he rises, turns, and wraps an arm around the giant’s neck. Already on his knees and now in a strangle hold, the giant throws his weight backward in an attempt to smash the strong man to the ground, but the man holds on and keeps squeezing. The crowd gasps and moves a collective step backward as the giant’s eyes bulge from strangulation. Without air, the giant man passes out and collapses to the rug. The strong man gives a last squeeze and rises to his feet in triumph. Without acknowledging his audience, he peers disgusted at his opponent for a long second, then walks over to his tent and booth.

“Who are these people?” I ask.

“They’re mostly misfits. A few of them enjoy this lifestyle and they are the reason the circus stays together. Many of them are hiding from society and others are rejected from society. Do you recognize him now?”

I listen to Harmony’s explanation, but my attention is quickly brought back to the spectacle. The show isn’t over as I assumed. I thought the strong man was going to retreat behind the flap of his tent, but he reappears. He moves to the corner of the rug and lifts the corner. He folds the carpet over the inert giant until the man is hidden within. The strong man steps onto the mounded rug. He still doesn’t acknowledge his audience. It’s as if we’re watching something private.

The strong man raises clenched fists to the clouds above.

“I call the Gods of the sky to take this intruder from my sight. Take him from this place and let him not return! Do it now!” he yells.

The carpet collapses flat beneath the strong man. The spectators look equally horrified and in awe at the strange show. The man wearing the snake walks into the crowd, holding out a large glass jar. The audience members turn out their pockets to leave a tip.

“Don’t miss the night performance,” he calls to the scattering crowd. “Seven o’clock folks. Do come back now. Our strong man and my vipers will be ready to amaze and dazzle you with feats of strength you will never find anywhere else in the world.”

“I don’t know him,” I say again. “Should I?” But my words are not completely true. The way the man moves as if he’s superhuman or has unnatural powers fueling him. And the disappearing act is hard to tell if it was real or not. The demonstration reminds me too much of Liam O’Flannagain and his wizardry.

“He’s one of us. Or he was, but he refuses to follow his calling,” Harmony says, and steps forward out of the cover of the trees.

“What are we doing here, Harmony?” I ask as my suspicions at her true motives grow.

Harmony keeps her gaze on my face. “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. Do you know who said those words?”

“Abe Lincoln,” I answer.

“That’s correct. And our man over there, his character has failed him miserably. For thirty years now, he’s been abusing it. He earns money by deceiving people. He uses others for his own gain. I watch over him to make sure he doesn’t destroy anyone fully.”

“I’ve never heard a thing about him,” I say with doubt.

“We don’t want the world knowing our every mistake. He turned from his position in the afterlife and is an irresponsible blowhard.”

“Has he fallen?” I ask. “Like Liam?”

“Yes, he is fallen, but different from Liam. He did not trade with another soul like Liam did.”

“How did he do it?” I ask, having never heard of this man. “And what about the man inside the carpet? Did he kill him? Or was it part of the illusion?”

“You’ve witnessed a trick. He is well practiced in magical ways.”

“Are you telling me you’re a regulator for fallen angels?”

“I think of myself more as a quiet supervisor for the misguided.”

“I am not misguided,” I say and take a step back.

“I never said you were,” she says, and looks back at the strong man.

He unrolls the rug. His expression is hard and distant. He finishes laying out the carpet, looks over, and sees us.

“And Liam? Do you visit him in Ireland?”

“I have,” she admits. “He’s a tricky old bugger. His use of magic hinders my work.”

I shake my head in disbelief. She tricked me into coming with her so I could see this?

“I don’t enjoy this part of my job, Nathaniel, so don’t look at me that way.”

“Like you’re using me to prove some point which has nothing to do with me.”

“It does and you know it,” she says calmly.

With her back to the strong man, she doesn’t see him head this way. I’m so furious, I ignore the hulking man stalking over to us and continue arguing with my friend.

“There’s nothing wrong with choosing love. Why can’t you and Marcus leave me alone? This is my fate and you don’t get a say in it. I haven’t even done anything!”

“Haven’t you? Haven’t you been seeking answers and wishing for your replacement? Weren’t you tempted to place Steven in your shoes and be off with your pretty girlfriend?”

“Of course, I thought of it, but I didn’t do it.”

“Your fate is entwined with many, Nathaniel Evans. You know it, and you know you can’t control destiny.”

Her face is fierce with the heat of her passion.

“I’m going to pretend you haven’t been keeping me hostage and delaying me all day just to show me your twisted idea of my future. I will never be like these people.” I wave a hand at the misfit carnival.

“Never is a long time and a faraway vision. I’m talking about now. You have no idea how miserable he is and what an abomination he’s become. I’m trying to save your soul from grief and desolation, Nathaniel.”

“I have a pretty good idea I’ll never be like him. Goodbye, Harmony.”

I nod over her shoulder as the strong man comes up behind Harmony, a belt clenched in his fists. He’s about to wrap it around her neck, but she leaps forward to reach out to me. If she gets a hand on me, I won’t be able to leave. She’ll be able to drag me anywhere she wants. The beast of a man is almost as quick as we are. He must possess magic or supernatural talents, because he’s able to see us and touch Harmony. Out of self-preservation, she switches directions and lashes out with a fist to the strong man’s face. The slap of knuckles to cheekbone is cringe-worthy, but the distraction gives me enough time to slip away.

 

∞

 

Inside the car with Juliana, I stare at her with longing and even more determination to be a part of her life, forever. She doesn’t jump or scream at my appearance and a small zing of pride races through me that she’s learning to handle her abilities.

I lay my hand over hers. The pressure I’ve been putting on myself to be with her in a real body again simmers at the edges and is ready to explode. Harmony should not have approached me that way.

“Maybe we could put a bell on you,” she says in an attempt to lighten the mood. I know she senses my agitation.

I’m not ready to speak and need a moment to calm down.

“What’s going on? Was it another suicide?” Juliana asks as she intertwines her fingers with mine.

“No.”

I’m about to confide the reason for Harmony’s distraction when the car hits something in the road. There’s a loud thunk and I instantly know the tire is flat.

“It’s me,” I groan, as I run my hand over my scalp. “This is my fault.”

“What? No. That was a rock in the road,” Juliana says, confused. “I didn’t see it in time to swerve and miss it.”

“Pull over someplace safe and I’ll change your tire for you.”

“I’m already driving on my spare tire.”

“Damn!”

Juliana flinches and takes her hand back.

“Sorry,” I apologize. “Have you noticed how you keep getting delayed by bad things today?”

“This is number three,” she says.

“It’s more than that,” I point out.

“No,” she disagrees. “The hair clip argument, Officer Suarez, and now the tire. That’s three.”

“I would include the forest fire yesterday, your mom walking in on us, and your grandmother’s announcement, but I don’t want to argue anymore. I know they’re trying to keep me away from you. There’s more going on here than I realized. I’m sorry about your tire. I’ll pay for a tow truck to come fix it.”

“We’re almost there. I’m going to keep driving to the parking lot.”

“I don’t know, Jules. You’ll have to replace the wheel, too, if you drive much farther.”

“I don’t care. And don’t you dare leave me again. We’re in this together from here on out. Bad juju or not.”

Determination in her eyes as she drives the last mile to the entrance of Red Rocks Park and Amphitheater and the repetitive sound of rubber flapping against pavement makes me hold my silence. Inside the gate, she pulls the car over into the first spot she sees, turns off the key, sets the emergency brake, and lets out a deep breath.

“We’ll hike up to the amphitheater from here. It’s far but not too far,” she says.

Raindrops begin to spatter against the windshield. Juliana and I glance skyward through the windshield.

“It can’t rain,” she says as if commanding the clouds to obey her will.

“Will they cancel the concert?”

“I don’t think so. Besides, it wasn’t raining in my vision.”

We glance outside again. More raindrops sprinkle across the glass. Juliana shudders and closes her eyes for an extra-long blink.

“What aren’t you telling me?” I ask.

She begins to collect her bag and pretends to be looking for something.

“It wasn’t raining. I’m not lying about that.”

“The way you’re acting right now makes me think you’re not telling me something.”

She bristles and physically puts space between us by leaning toward the door. “Don’t tell me how I’m acting.”

“It’s obvious something isn’t right — besides the obvious problems coming from my end.”

I reach for the door handle and step outside. Today isn’t turning out the way I wanted at all. Everything is happening exactly the opposite of how it should be. And every damn time I try to talk or do something for Jules, we end up fighting. I don’t want to fight with her, or argue, or have any friction between us, but it’s like I can’t get anything right today.

I take a seat on the hillside next to the car. The sprinkling rain lightens and only an occasional drop moistens the red dirt at my feet.

Standing aside while my girlfriend packs her backpack and prepares to hike the mile up to the amphitheater is a challenge. My manners scream at me to assist her, be courteous and helpful, but sheer pigheadedness won’t let me forget I keep screwing everything up today. It’s a convincing enough argument that I continue to brood while Juliana slams doors and grits her teeth. She finally approaches and I don’t miss the direct impatient look on her face.

“Have Jared and the band arrived yet?”

It’s evening and the concert doesn’t start until eight p.m. We made it on time, but I know Juliana wanted to be here for the sound check.

“They’re backstage. I talked to Jared right before you came back. Sound check is over and they were eating dinner.”

“I’m ready whenever you are.” I gather my feet beneath me and stand.

“Are we still fighting?”

“Juliana, I never want to fight with you. I mean that to the very core of my being. But you can’t expect me to not speak my mind. I want to know what’s going on with you. Whether I like what you have to say or not. We’re not always going to agree and we’re going to misunderstand each other at some point. That never makes me love you less.”

“Fine,” she says and starts walking.

Obviously still pissed off for reasons I can’t begin to fathom, I follow close behind, sticking to the edge of the road that leads to the amphitheater. After a long silence, I decide to get an aerial view of the park. I want to know the layout and I’d like to see if there’s a faster way to get to the stage rather than following the narrow road with cars zipping by perilously close to Juliana. The roads lead to a couple of massive parking lots for easier access to the theater, but there are also foot trails wandering throughout the grounds. The view from the air of the enormous shelves of red sandstone rising out of the rolling hills west of Denver showcases the nearly one thousand acres of park. The aerial view isn’t quite as impressive as approaching these monolithic rocks on foot, where you can really experience how small human beings are.

Juliana must have been riding a similar thought train because she’s studying a large board with a map of the grounds. I know she’s aware of me at her side, but she says nothing. She leaves the signboard behind and takes the next trail.

Fifty feet from the road, following along the packed red dirt path and surrounded by the grasses and shrubs, we approach our first red rock sticking out of the ground. It’s a towering column with bands of color through the prehistoric ocean floor. I can’t help but stare at the geologic wonder and I notice Juliana concentrating on it as well.

Not wanting to keep stalling, we continue onward and hear the rattling sound too late. In a flash, I find the source and see Juliana’s foot coming down onto the irritated rattlesnake. Without a moment to think, I push Juliana out of the way and throw my body in front of hers.

The bite happens so fast I’m unsure as to whether or not it even happened. But I am sure I knocked Juliana over. Scooping her into my arms, I speed away from the defensive rattler and don’t look back.

“Stop,” she eventually says.

I look into her face and slow my frantic steps. I think I’m heading toward people, toward medical attention, but I’m not fully conscious of my direction.

My shirt is clenched in her fists. “Nathaniel, are you bit?”

“Yes,” I mutter.

“Put me down,” she urges.

Stopping, Juliana regains her feet but stumbles slightly. “Where does it hurt?” I ask, thinking about my plan to get her to a medic.

She holds her side and flinches.

“Did the snake bite you, too?” I ask, as panic floods my system for a second round.

She shakes her head and gently stretches her leg. “I landed funny, but I’m okay.”

“Crap. I can’t do anything right today.”

“We’re not standing here because of me, you nincompoop,” she says.

I glance at my leg. There’s an unpleasant stinging sensation spreading through my calf but it’s mild. The more I ponder the idea of an angel being bit by a rattlesnake the more acute my awareness of the bite becomes.

“This may take me a minute,” I say.

The fear on her face increases and tears threaten to spill from her beautiful green eyes.

“Don’t do that. I need a few seconds. Then I’ll be fine.”

She manages a slight nod before I let go of my body and disappear into the ether.

“How long was I gone?” I ask as I return to her side, leg as good as new.

“A couple minutes,” she says.

She stands in the same place from when I left. Something was odd about the snakebite and I needed to leave the physical realm for a complete restoration of my spirit. It worked, but leaving Juliana wasn’t the greatest plan. I wrap my arms around her.

“I’m fine now. Snakes can’t hurt me, love. And you’re fine, right? It’s far down the trail now.” I mutter the reassurances as her entire body trembles against mine.

“Snakes aren’t my favorite animals,” she says into my shirt. “Especially after… well, after…”

Her ordeal with being possessed and exorcised of a nasty succubus. I hadn’t thought of that. Of course, she’s shaken up. I run my hands over her back, attempting to sooth and calm her nerves.

“Breathe, Jules. It’s okay now. Snakes are misunderstood. They represent transmutation and alchemy. They’re a good sign. A sign of the cycles of life and death. They can transmute poison, physical, mental, emotional, and turn it into something good and pure and worthy. Snakes are the ultimate symbol of rebirth and healing. I know they can be frightening, but it’s because their power is misunderstood.” I utter the attributes of snake medicine without thinking about what I’m saying. I need to keep her calm as much as I need to keep my mind busy so I don’t lose my cool and go ballistic with worry and regret. I know this is still my doing somehow, like she’s become the unlucky recipient of my twisted karma.

“I started to think you were hurt. For real. Like when the demon slashed your side. Nathaniel,” She pauses and barely tips her head up. “I didn’t tell you one part of my vision this morning. It’s not because I was keeping it from you. It’s because I don’t know how to explain what I saw. Jared's passing was clear, but other parts were blurry and confusing.”

I brush the back of my knuckles along the side of her face and push back the fine hairs that have escaped her braids.

“You don’t have to tell me right now. You hold my heart and my soul and I trust you. The delays are my fault. And with the distractions, I keep forgetting how you must feel today. You have only one Jared and I know how much he means to you. Come on, you need to get up to the stage if you’re going to see him before they go on tonight.”

She glances at the last half mile of hill and rocks separating us from the stage and seating area.

“Right.” She steps out of my arms.

Her repressed whimper as she shifts her weight kills me. She must be sorer than she admitted.

I squat down and offer my back. “Get on.”

She starts to, but stops herself. “That feels worse.”

“I’ll carry you.”

“No. I’ll be fine. I can walk it off. Once the blood starts flowing, it will feel better.”

“I don’t think so.” I place my hands on her hips. “This will fix you up faster than walking on sore joints.”

Channeling my energy is as easy as moving. It takes so little thought that I find myself distracted with Juliana’s smooth waistline and the curve of her body as I let the energy flow through me and into her injury. With every challenging experience that has happened to me since I met Juliana, I can’t believe how easy it is to be an angel now. Before, I had to rest after a little physical exertion, and I would be gone for ten to twenty hours at a time recuperating my strength. Since I died, and since I brought Jared back to life, my powers have increased exponentially with each incident. Maybe Marcus and Harmony are only worried about losing someone who is almost as powerful as they are.

After a short moment, I ask, “Any different?”

“Much better,” she says, and I notice the darkening of her eyes and the subtle flush to her cheeks.

I take her hand to begin the last part of our short trek. She pulls me in close to her and tips her face to mine. Unable to resist the invitation, I lay my lips against hers and let my hands roam over the curves of hip and low back that I was yearning to touch only seconds before.

“I love you,” she says as we part from our kiss. “Thank you for saving me from the snake. Spending the night in the hospital is the last place I want to be.”

“It isn’t my idea of a perfect date, either. And you’re welcome.”

“And for putting up with my crabby side.”

“You can be a crab whenever you want,” I assure her.

Leading the way so I can watch for snakes and any other unforeseen calamities, I hold tight to her hand and try not to think about what we’re in for during the next few hours.

Juliana’s certain her vision showed the end of Jared’s life happening tonight, but how? She didn’t give exact details. All I know is that I’m going to need to stay with her after it happens. Could that be the reason I haven’t been assigned a new client? Maybe the higher powers are showing mercy on my situation and will let me comfort the family, even though Marcus is assigned to Jared. I can speculate all I want, but there’s really no way of knowing the truth.

The central rocks near the stage loom in front of us like towering ships of stone voyaging away from the prairie to the east. Juliana’s hand tightens in mine. Magnificent doesn’t do this place justice. A swell of pride expands through my chest as I realize Jared has reached a level of success others dream of. He may be in the opening act, but I have no doubt Mostly Mayhem will continue on after Jared leaves. Their fill-in guitarist, now keyboard player, Alex, will help hold things together.

Juliana stops our hurried march to stare at the wall of red stones. “There was so much darkness and a blinding light. Then a lot of confusion. I don’t know what it means, Nathaniel. That’s the best I can do to explain what I saw before I woke up.”

“I think you weren’t meant to see that part. Whatever happens tonight, I’ll be with you. Let’s hope this abysmal jinx I’m under has passed.”

She starts walking, heading for the long concrete staircase, which is the final part of our climb before entering the amphitheater. Raindrops begin falling again. I get the distinct impression they’re landing only on our heads.