Chapter 27 – Marino
Fucking Dante. He’s always been so stubborn. He always has to be right.
But I’m not going to let him be right this time. Because that wouldn’t be good for him. I have to remember what’s important, and the good things we’ve found with Jessica. For my sake as well as Dante’s.
There are certain things in life that one never forgets. I will never forget when child protective services came to take Dante and me from the house we shared with our roommate mothers. I was so fucking scared, and Dante was all I had.
He held onto my hand and told me, “Don’t worry, I’m here with you.” And he kept his word, from then until now.
I will never forget the first time my mom went to jail, because she wrote me letters every day, apologizing for not being there for me in the past and promising to make it up to me in the future.
I believed her, but when she got out all she cared about was scoring and getting high. So I forget all the other times she went to jail and started the cycle all over again.
But I can’t forget the day my foster parents told me my mom had died of a drug overdose. I was thirteen and Dante had just gotten out of juvie. He was supposed to run some stolen goods to a connection he had made while he was in there, but he told me he wasn’t going to do it so that he could make sure he’d be able to come to my mom’s funeral with me.
And he kept his word. Because he was more of a parent than any I’d ever had. I don’t remember what color dress my mom was buried in. Or what kind of bullshit the minister spewed. I’m sure it had something to do with her being a loving but struggling young single mother, and about her finding peace and forgiveness in the afterlife.
All of that is a blur. But I do remember Dante’s presence by my side, just like always.
“Don’t worry, I’m here with you.”
He had his arm around me the whole time. He came up to her casket with me and then to her gravesite.
I hated her at the time. But since then I made my own peace with it. I forgave her. I went back to the gravesite without him and told her so.
Dante didn’t approve. But he had given me the strength to do it and he still doesn’t know to this day how good of a decision it was, how much it freed me.
I don’t think he’s ever forgiven his own mother or made peace with her, and as far as I know she’s still alive. But that is his decision to make, whereas I had to make what little decision I could when it came to what to do about my mom, who wasn’t even alive anymore. So I forgave her.
That was the first thing I’d done in my life that he didn’t approve of, but I’m glad I did it. And this is going to be the second.
Another thing I won’t forget is the first time I saw Jessica. How I was blown away by her unique mix of innocence and sexiness. Even now, knowing what she had come for, I still feel amazed when I look back at that night.
I guess part of me had known it was too good to be true. And yet I had wanted it to be true so badly that I ignored any warning signs. The funny thing is, it really has come true. And I don’t want it to end.
I can’t forget the look on Jessica’s face as she comes for me. For us. Her beautiful brown eyes and her sexy curves. Her happy laugh and her lovely seductive dance.
There’s no way I can let her out of my life. That would just be letting Samantha win. I thought I loved Samantha but now I fucking know what true love is, and it’s Jessica.
Jessica didn’t have to write that letter. She didn’t have to come tell us what was going on and what she had decided to do to make it right. She could have escaped back into her regular life and probably taken us down as well.
She would have really advanced her political career. But she’d sacrificed it for me. And for Dante. For the three of us all together. It couldn’t have been an easy choice to make, knowing how different Jessica’s background is from ours. And yet she still chose us.
I know what I’m going to do to make things right. To be back with Jessica. I just hope that Dante will get on board with it.
It’s about time he started listening to what his “little brother” decides to do. Just like he told me he would when I was mad at him and he wanted me to forgive him. And I did, because true love forgives.
True love starts fresh and builds anew, even after mistakes have left near destruction in its path. True love can fucking conquer any obstacle. And I have some fucking conquering to do.