CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

“I’m in that dream again where I’m dating Colton Hawk…” - Gia

 

“There's something wrong with him!” Snapped the petite woman wringing her hands together, her whole-body language was curled in on herself. Today marked the thirteenth consecutive week for Beth and Skip Minksky marriage therapy. Sitting beside her on the soft cotton couch was Beth’s husband of eleven years looking resigned to his wife's outburst.

It wasn’t the first time this kind of explosion occurred within moments of their session beginning but after a break through when Gia explained what theory of mind was. In psychology terms it was to hear someone else’s point of view, not to just listen and wait for your turn to talk, it felt as though the pair were finally hearing each other.

“Try it the way we said, Beth, and not to lay blame.”

“Fine.” She huffed. “I feel,” she stressed the word, “that there's something wrong with him. Why does he need sex four or five times a week? It's too much, I'm not a machine.”

Skip dropped his blond head over his hands and sighed really long.

It was the same argument they'd been having for weeks now having moved on from their initial need for therapy being that Beth had her mother living with them and Skip considered it an intrusion to their marriage being that mom in law interfered in every decision within their house.

Listening to their back and forth discussion with the tools she'd aided them with in their first sessions she saw the husband's barriers go up at first, as was his default setting, but over time he'd learned Gia's office was a safe space for him to confess his opinions, even if they were against his wife. Slowly his shoulders lowered, and he looked her directly in the eye. “I love you Bethie. That love means I want to fuck you. Excuse my language, doc.” He said to Gia offhandedly and she smiled. She'd heard worse in her time as a therapist.

She'd seen much worse when she’d trained in drug counselling for eight months. Oh boy. That had been the most taxing time in her professional career. She'd hated every moment of that internship, knowing in the first month it wasn't the area of psychology she wanted to aim her career towards.

She wanted to help people in love.

The proof of her successes was pictures in a folder of her couples she’d helped over the years. Their relationships healed resulting in children sometimes.

It gave her the sense of accomplishment.

She might not have had that kind of partnership in her life yet, but she could claim a hand in mending broken hearts.

It was enough.

Until the object of her crush strode back into her life and all Gia wanted now was her own happily ever after.

If only she could marriage-counsel whammy Hawk so easily.

But he was a stubborn one.

 “How does that make you feel, Beth, hearing Skip express his feelings regarding your sex life?” Rather than let the couple descend into arguments months old as was the usual way with frustrated people, she guided the conversation.

Gia saw a great amount of love in this couple. Somehow along their years together they'd lost their way to each other. Watching them unlock their hearts these months was both frustrating and rewarding. Sometimes it was one step forward and ten million back. Other days she just wanted to bang their heads together like that internet meme 'now kiss.'

“I feel like...” Beth looked directly at her husband and Gia watched his features change, downshifting into something softer, open and expectant. “I can't live up to what he wants.”

Skip swore. “That's bullshit, Bethie. I want you. Only you. I wish you wanted me instead of making me feel like a fucking predator for needing to hug you or god forbid to have sex with my woman.”

Wow. Breakthrough. She watched on. Her notebook across her lap.

“I do! God. I do. I just—I just hate to disappoint you.”

“Beth …” exhaled Skip and as one they reached for the other’s hand, clasping tightly it was a long few minutes before Gia broke their silence and rallied the conversation again.

By the end of their session she thought they’d taken a great step forward in reconnecting with each other. She showed them out and pencilled them in for next week. The Minksky’s were one of her couples who opted not to be transferred to Leo’s practice, but to have long distance video sessions with Gia instead.

It was well after six when she finally closed her laptop after transferring her notes to hard copy. Gia rubbed at her forehead, a tiny ache behind her eyes building as she placed her reading glasses back in their case and tossed into her purse.

She’d officially seen her last clients in Austin.

It was bittersweet.

On one hand she was so excited to be heading back to Colorado. She missed her big brother and his sweet baby-chops that was her darling and most favorite niece. But she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little sad to be leaving behind the practice she’d grown the last few years. She’d be leaving it in good hands, but still, she had an ache in her chest.

And another large reason for her twitching excitement was the man waiting outside for her.

She knew this because he’d texted her “I’m here.” Forty minutes ago.

A man of few words was Hawk and each one thrilled her.  

There he was.

Man spreading his gorgeous self on the gray seats along the far wall facing her door. One arm along the back of the chairs, the other dangling on his thigh. His blues lifted the moment she opened the door and the bloom of love in her belly was immense as their gazes clashed, though he didn’t smile, she felt his strong stare all the same licking over her. When Gia managed to drag her gaze from him she noticed her secretary’s eyes nearly bugged out of her head.

She suppressed her giggle.

No wonder he was scowling if he’d had to deal with Caroline’s scrutiny all this time, and god forbid if she tried to talk to him.

“Hi, sorry to keep you waiting.” She offered as he stood to his towering height and once again swept the air out of her lungs with just how big he was. In his usual biker uniform, his shirt today was off gray with the collar of the white tee showing underneath. His jeans were well worn and softly cast to his long legs along with his biker boots, her biker was looking sexy as hell.

It was four days into Hawk's new 'look' and that first sight of him still made her heart thump out of her chest and her pelvis to clench tightly.

Seems he was having the same effect on Caroline who appeared half frozen in place behind her desk as she mouthed to Gia; Oh my god, Gia! Oh, my god, who’s the hottie? While Gia suppressed a grin, Hawk took her book laden satchel out of her hands, swinging it onto his shoulder, next he took her briefcase like he thought that was too heavy for her to carry.

“I could get used to you meeting me at work.” She smiled and wished he’d lean in and kiss her.

Since their talk he’d been … she’d class it as different around her. Not odd or distance just different. Attentive was a good way to describe Hawk. He took watching her seriously, they’d practically been glued at the hip the last few days and she wasn’t complaining one bit.

But as considerate as he’d been when she’d wanted transporting all over town to finish last minute errands, he hadn’t made any kind of sexual move towards her and she was in a word going hornily-crazy. Not to mention he’d insisted on waiting outside her parent’s house last night even though she’d wanted him to come inside. He’d nodded to her mom at the door and stayed by his bike.

So, would a kiss be so out of the question? She understood his reasons for not taking their relationship … whatever they labelled it … to the next level, he was thinking of her and Gia, horny and desperate could still respect him for it, but she missed his mouth and fingers between her legs.

She leaned in and brushed her lips to his cheek. “Thank you for waiting.”

He grunted a response.

“Caroline, this is my good friend Hawk. Hawk, my right arm and best assistant who I’ll miss terribly unless I can convince her to move to Colorado.”

Hawk shifted his gaze and nodded, otherwise that was the best kind of greeting her PA would get. Gia bit back a grin, he really was a socially inept creature and she adored him just how he was.

Call her jealous, but she didn’t want to see him smiling at another woman or being charming. She liked that he paid attention only to her.

After she’d said her goodbyes to Caroline and let her go, a knock on the waiting room doorjamb had both her and Hawk turning.

A growl from Hawk’s throat first alerted Gia to danger, assuming it was one of the Russian gentlemen back again.

But no. It was only Leo.

Tall, dark muddy, messy hair, wearing his rectangle black specs today and his tailored suit jacket open at the waist with light gray pants and an open necked white shirt. Leo Montague was a well put together man, funny in a dry wit kind of a way. A native of New Hampshire he’d moved to Austin several years ago with a girlfriend who sadly didn’t remain as such for very long and he’d set up his practice in the same building as Gia.

They’d become colleagues who lunched several times a week and discussed difficult cases.

It was Leo who bought Gia’s practice, taking on 60% of her clientele. There were five other therapists in their building and Leo was going to be the principal psychiatrist.

“Hey.” He grinned brushing a hand through his disordered hair that could be classed as well-fucked hair by the female population, unaware of the man at Gia’s side who was radiating cold thunder glaring at Leo stepping into her office. “I’m glad I caught you before you left.” Height wise he was about the same as Hawk, but whereas Hawk was wide in the shoulders and lean in the hips, Leo was the rangy kind of lanky.

“Hi. I was just heading out. What’s up?” She asked with a smile.

Leo’s eyes flickered toward Hawk and she watched his instant greeting falter. Was it a wonder when Hawk had a glare only a serial killer could appreciate “Hi,” he offered tentatively with his hand outstretched. Oh, boy, she thought. “I’m Leo, a friend and pain in Gia’s ass when I come calling for coffee every other day when I run out.”

“This is Hawk,” she input the introduction since the man himself was glowering like steel covered fury.

God, he was magnificent when he was jealous.

Unwarranted yet still delicious.

After a long thirty seconds of dead silence and Gia’s brain firing out so much lust for Hawk she put her hand on his arm to let him know he could stand down and not paint the walls with Leo’s blood.

The victim … eh, her colleague was looking perplexed probably never having received such cold dismissive treatment before and though it was against every bad manners lesson she received from her now deceased Yaya, there wasn’t a part of Gia that wanted to correct Hawk or to encourage him to behave a certain way.

“So…” Leo cleared his throat, rocking back on his heels, two hands slipped into his pants pockets. He was your typical hot geek. Or so Caroline liked to inform Gia most every day. Even Grace Kelly had chimed her opinion of why Gia wasn’t banging his brains out when he was young, free, rich and single. “How do you know our Gia?” Asked Leo placing his hand on her shoulder platonically. He was tactile, and she’d always been comfortable with him.

Hawk however, was not.  

Was it possible to feel someone vibrate when you weren’t touching them? It was either the earth shaking underneath her Valentino pumps or Hawk truly was pulsating an angry sociopath soundwave from his gorgeous body.

“Oh, we go way back. He’s my brother’s best friend.” Chewing on the inside of her cheek, Gia found herself on the verge of laughing gleefully.

To get any reaction from Hawk was amazing.

To observe him posturing possessive tendencies with his great big chest inflating hard inhales because another guy happened to walk through her door, she was practically vibrating herself, but for a whole other reason.

That reason being she wanted to dry-hump all over him.

Hawk swerved his blond head towards her and she was branded by his eyes in an instant, washed all over by the possession he refused to put into words, but it was there, shining like the first snowfall. “Do you have your keys? I’ll drop your bags off in the car.”

She fished them out and their fingers brushed together. He clasped them for a second before sending Leo a stare worthy of death and he strode out carrying her things.

Oh my. Was she swooning? She felt like her legs were less steady.

“What the hell was that?” Leo chuckled and blew out a breath. “Did I kill that guy’s pet dog or something? I was sure he was about to punch me.”

Gia didn’t feel the urge to make excuses for Hawk. She loved every goddamn inch of his surly self and wouldn’t want to change him nor try to explain his behavior to anyone.

She grinned and rolled a shoulder. “He doesn’t have a dog. Now what can I do for you? I’m just out the door and I’m ready to eat my leg I’m that hungry.”

She spent a moment talking about one of her case notes she’d transferred to him then went to meet Hawk outside.

His bike was parked at the side of her car and his eyes came at her instantly when she stepped outside.

It would be nice to relax with a glass of wine and Hawk’s company tonight. She was brain tired and a tad emotional. “Are you following me home?”

 

 

******

 

Seven minutes. That’s how long he’d left her alone for with that charming dickhead in there with his glasses, movie star looks and his well-spoken voice. Hawk was ready to tear the building down brick by brick and piss his ownership around Gia so no more idiots with smiles a mile wide would dare come around her. Of course, the little bit of thing wouldn’t thank him for hulking out, so he’d parked himself by his bike and brooded through a series of misfortunate accidents that guy could get into. It made him feel better.

But then she strode out like a runway model, looking so incredibly beautiful his skin hurt and all he could think about was mounting her in the dirt. “I need to kiss you right now.” He all but growled with his teeth crushed together when she was in touching distance.

The sound was a cobra hiss.

Rather than look fearful, Gia smiled her dreamy smile.

She stopped by the side of her car, hand on the door before she opened it and all but leaned into his hard, unforgiving body.

Funny, how any touch from Gia never resulted in his flinching away and wanting to scrape his skin off. In fact, he was a goddamn addict for her fingers inching up his chest and playing with the shorter hairs of his beard.

It was a nothing touch, really. Fingertips moving down barely brushed the inside of his upper arm and yet Hawk could have sworn it was the same reaction he’d have if Gia were unzipping his jeans.

He shuddered, letting his head hang down, eyes penetrating, hardly able to contain the obsessed growl lurking in his throat.

“I can't watch another man with his hands on you.” The urge to snap that jerk’s fingers off one at a time and shove them down his smiling throat and growl how much of a mistake it was to touch Hawk's woman had been a strong one.

She grinned wider, all but bouncing on the spot. “Ohhh. Look at you, mister possessive.”

She looked thrilled.

Hawk was miserable.

The tick in his jaw was his only answer.

“Fine then, go ahead and kiss me.” And didn't she just lift her sassy little chin in the air and present her lips.

He crashed them under his, tasting her sweetness and swallowing her purr and in the process, he tied himself a little tighter to Gia.

The thread made of steel was becoming so tangled in her he didn’t know where she started, and he ended.

Her lips were wet and pouty when he lifted away.

His voice eroded with the unspent lust he wanted to sate on her neat little body.

He was taking her home tomorrow. Was he strong enough to leave her to her new life that wasn’t stained with a monster?

Or would he go through with what she wanted by having him in her life?

Dating.

He didn’t know how to do that.

But Hawk knew he could satisfy every hunger the little bit had or would ever have.

She didn’t have to know his demons.

“Let’s get you home,” he husked and opened the door for her.

“Ride safe.” She told him, smiling.

His gut hurt to love her.

All he wanted to do was love her with every inch of his sickness.

On the slow ride back to her almost empty house, his phone vibrated at the last count seven times with calls.

Once he was parked behind her, he sent Gia inside and called the unrecognizable number back. “Who the hell is this?” He barked low.

And he shouldn’t have been surprised at the voice equally pissed off on the other end. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing mauling my daughter in fuckin’ public, you bastard!” Yelled Ajax. “Seems you’re deaf as well as fuckin’ sick.”

“You’re having me watched?”

The angry hissing continued. “My son informs me Gia is in danger from the Russians, of fuckin’ course I’m having her guarded and guess what he reported he saw! You were fuckin’ kissing outside her work.”

Irritation stung Hawk’s chest, halting his steps, he deviated and let his eyes scan the street for any sign Ajax’s man was around.

“I told you to stay away from—”

Hawk did some of his own snarling, his fingers almost breaking the phone.

Panic swelling.

It was only a matter of time before Ajax did some talking to his daughter, wasn’t it?

“Your constant drone is boring me, old man.” He hung up.

Feet slower as he made his way to the front door, left open for him.

Gia welcoming him inside.

It could go so many ways. It would take nothing to retrace his steps and just ride off. Give Ajax what he wanted. Not get caught up in old mess that made acid burn in his gut. Because he’d rather face surgery with a rusty knife and no anaesthetic than have any of his old life put back in his face. Worse; in Gia’s face.

He could call any number of Renegade Souls and have them take Gia home. He pictured Ajax’s neck between his hands. Though Hawk knew he couldn’t kill the man, he so fucking wanted to.

But there was only one outcome as he let the door close with him inside her house.

Maybe he didn’t deserve her. Hell, he was the one person on this goddamn earth who knew for a fact he didn’t deserve the sweet woman inside.

If he were any sort of a moral man he’d leave her well alone and far away from the filth swirling through his mind on a constant loop.

“Hawk?” He heard her call from upstairs.

His heart started to pound.

That. He thought.

That unimaginable sensation right there in the middle of his breastbone was the reason he wasn’t turning around and making tracks.

She made him feel.

His drug called to him and he licked his bottom lip in anticipation of a hit.

No matter what Ajax threatened, nothing would make him leave her now. He’d soon find out just how much of a prick Hawk could turn into if he continued to vomit out his veiled intimidations.

“Yeah, little bit. It’s me.”

Hawk was where he wanted to be.