Chapter 18
‡
He was alive. He was home. He was with Kenzie.
That was all that mattered.
Tonight’s events were still whirling in Eli’s mind as he and Kenzie walked up the steps of his front porch. He’d never thought a day would come that he’d deliver a baby with a gun pointed at him and he had no desire to do it again.
Things had worked out, thankfully. Both mother and child were safe and in the hospital. When the baby first came out, Eli was scared it was stillborn. The baby was blue. But after unwrapping the umbilical cord from the infant’s neck and stimulating his back, he cried.
That’s when the father of the baby decided that the baby didn’t “look like him” and raised his gun to shoot either the mother or the baby or both. Gabe tackled him. The gun discharged, but thankfully the round hit the far wall.
Gabe was the true the hero of the night. If not for him, Eli was sure that one or more of them would be dead or injured.
Eli opened the front door and stood to the side to let Kenzie go in front of him. He followed her inside. After shutting the door and clicking the lock in place, Eli’s muscles relaxed for the first time that night. When they did, exhaustion pulled at him as he crashed from the adrenaline that had spiked through him.
But he was not about to give into it, not before he talked with Kenzie.
One good thing that had come out of tonight was that he was done tiptoeing around things with the only girl he’d ever loved. He might not be able to tell her everything, but he was going to tell her that he’d never wanted to hurt her and that it had killed him to walk away from her all those years ago. He was going to tell her that he loved her and that he would do anything to protect her.
He had a lot that he wanted to say, that he needed to say to Kenzie, but he wasn’t sure how receptive she’d be. She hadn’t spoken a word to him the entire ride home. Since they left the station, he’d asked a dozen times or more if she was okay and he hadn’t even gotten a mmmhmm. She’d barely nodded her head in response.
“Kenzie,” he said her name softly. “We need to talk.”
Her blonde hair swayed against her shoulders as she shook her head no. “I don’t want to talk.”
She turned to face him, and when their eyes met, the energy that sparked between them was overwhelming. Undeniable. More intense than a thousand forest fires.
As she stared up at him, a single tear ran down her face. Eli reached out and used his thumb to wipe it off her cheek. His chest expanded with love as she leaned into his touch and he cradled her jaw in his palm.
“I was so scared,” she whispered as she sucked in a shaky breath. “I was so scared I was going to lose you. I can’t lose you.”
“I’m here,” he rushed to assure her. “I’m here.”
She nodded as more tears stained her face. Leaning down, he softly kissed her forehead. His intent had been to comfort her but when she tilted her head up and pressed her mouth to his, that changed.
He’d thought that he was completely physically exhausted. Spent. He would’ve sworn that he’d already expended every last ounce of energy that his body had to give. He was wrong.
Adrenaline shot through him like speed in his veins. He was more than awake and aware—he was hyper-awake and hyperaware. Sounds were sharper, colors brighter. Time seemed like it was speeding up and slowing down all once.
In short, he felt more alive than he ever had. During the standoff, all he’d thought about was Kenzie. He was desperate to touch her, to hold her, to be with her.
She might’ve felt the same thing because her lips devoured his with urgency. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him as tightly as he could. Everything about the kiss, from the way that their lips moved against each other to the way that he held her against him with all the strength in his arms, was driven by pure desperation. There was no other word for it.
She sucked his tongue as her trembling fingers traced up and down his neck, and the sensation caused his cock to stiffen uncontrollably. He vibrated with that need as he slipped his hand underneath her shirt and caressed the soft skin of her waist. He was going to touch and lick every single inch of her skin that night. He was going to show her how alive he was, how solid and real.
He pushed her shirt up over her head and then slid it off entirely. It took every ounce of restraint he had not to just rip every stitch of clothing off of her in two seconds flat. To not let his animal instincts take over and ravage her the way he wanted to. But, he wasn’t going to do that. That wasn’t what she needed right now. She was too emotional, too raw. It tore at his heart.
Taking his time, he moved his head and began peppering kisses down her neck and across her collarbone. His lips grazed slowly, taking care to be gentle against her quivering body. He fought the urge to open his mouth wide and taste the sweetness of her skin. Instead, he forced himself to press his mouth softly against her delicate chest.
When he reached the lace of her bra, he trailed his attentions across the tops of her gorgeous mounds, searing a path of pleasure with his heated lips as he unhooked her clasp from behind and pulled the straps off her shoulders and down her arms in one smooth motion.
It fell to the ground.
Seeing Kenzie stand in front of him with her breasts bared and her stomach quivering, ignited a ferocious need in him.
“God…you’re beautiful,” passion threaded Eli’s voice as he bent his head and took her nipples into his mouth, sucking them between his lips and swirling his tongue around them.
With one hand his fingers splayed across her hip and gripped tightly, anchoring her in place. The other hand he ran roughly up and down her back and along the sides of her torso. He was consumed with making her feel surrounded by him. He wanted to touch her everywhere at once. He wanted her to feel completely wrapped up in him.
With fingers still shaking with lust, he unzipped her jeans and pushed them down over her hips and legs with an urgency that drew a groan from his throat and a gasp from hers.
She wriggled beneath his attention as he nipped her hardened peaks before licking and sucking them as he moved from one breast to the other and back again. He understood the feeling. Staying still under the weight of tingling arousal was nearly impossible. It was a sensation that demanded action.
Her body’s response only added fuel to the fire of his desire. “I want you naked, Mackenzie. Now.”
“Yes, sir, Captain Bossy,” she teased breathlessly, drawing a smile to his lips.
Kenzie had always had a way of bringing a special light that was all her own into any situation. Even as a teen, he’d sometimes felt like he’d had the weight of the world on his shoulders but she’d always been able to make it disappear. All it took was a smile from her, and everything in his world was better.
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, the amber windows to her soul staring up at him as she heeded his request. Slowly, she stepped out of her pants and panties, keeping her eyes locked with his as she kicked them off her legs.
When she was finally, gloriously naked, she spun in a slow circle and the energy shifted with heated intensity. “Is this what you wanted?”
Eli was used to hot. When he was fighting fires, the temperature reached suffocating levels. That was what he felt now. The only difference was that the heat from a fire came from outside his body, and this heat came from deep in his belly.
“Yes.” His jaw clenched as he reached for her, but she swatted his hands away.
Her hands shook as she moved them to his shirt, pulling it up his chest and then off over his head the same way that he’d done with hers. “I want you naked, Eli. Now.”
He ducked out of it and when he straightened, he saw that her eyes were dark with hunger and her breath suddenly shallow as she stared at his chest.
Her eyes raked over him, and he felt her stare like a touch. He moved to pull her to him, but she put her hand in the center of his chest, stopping his advance.
“I just want to look at you. I want to touch you.”
She was telling him that she wanted to take the wheel and drive this encounter. Being in the passenger seat was not a position he was used to taking. But for Kenzie, he’d try.
Using just the tip of her fingers, she ran her hand over his chest, shoulders, arms, and abs in unhurried exploration. Each pass she made over his body grew bolder and more aggressive. His chest was rising and falling at the erotic sensations her touch was arousing in him.
When she leaned forward and added her lips and mouth to the mix, he had to lock his knees to stay standing. She covered his upper body with open-mouthed kisses and just as he was about to snap from the building tension, Kenzie dropped to her knees in front of him.
Eli groaned. This was the stuff of his fantasies. Plenty of his idle hours had been filled with memories of Kenzie, naked and on her knees in front of him. It was hot as hell just to imagine, but to look down and see it again in living color put those fantasies to shame.
He looked down the length of his body and watched her unbutton and unzip his pants then push them down with his boxer briefs just far enough to pull out his raging erection.
As soon as he sprang free from the prison that his jeans had been, the powerful pulse of blood coursing through it overtook his entire body, like a strong baseline of a drumbeat. He could feel it pounding in his heart, in his ears, in every single one of his muscles.
She slipped her silky lips down the length of his shaft and back up again. He wove his fingers through her hair and pulled it off her face. It gave him the perfect view as she sucked his length into the velvety warmth of her mouth. She took her time, paying particular attention to the swollen head, swirling her tongue around and around his engorged tip. She added her hand and began to stroke up and down his shaft. At first, she alternated plunging him into her mouth and teasing the crown of his dick, but soon she concentrated all her energy and attention on sucking him off, taking more and more of him into her mouth.
When he felt the tip of his throbbing erection hitting the back of her throat his jaw clenched as he hissed through his teeth at the pleasure that shot straight down to his balls, causing them to tighten against his body. He tried to roll his hips back, not wanting to choke her. But instead of relishing the release from the intense pressure, she increased the intensity that she was using as she moved her mouth up and down in tight suction on his shaft.
Her hunger served to make him even harder. Seeing how eager she was, feeling the same intensity that was overwhelming him resonating inside her, driving her motion, heightened his arousal tenfold.
She wrapped her hand around the base of his shaft and then followed her lips up so that either her mouth or her hand was covering every inch of him all the time. Her palm quickly became slick with the saliva that was coating him.
Blood raced faster and faster through his veins. His heart pounded like a runaway horse, and his body temperature was through the roof. He felt his arousal building to an inevitable climax.
Knowing that he only wanted to come if it was with her, he reached down and pulled her up.
“What are you doing?” she asked with an edge of defensiveness as she stood.
“Taking you to the shower,” he explained. “You have no idea how hard it was, literally, for me to walk away last night when you were wet and naked—”
“Okay,” she cut in, her lips turning up in a wickedly naughty smile. “Less talk, more action.”
“Action, huh?” He playfully swatted her backside, and she giggled as she ran away.
He easily caught her in the hallway and hauled her up against him. When he did, she squirmed in his arms and twisted around, so she was facing him, then her arms and legs wrapped around him. His erection pulsed as it was pinned to his body by the wet heat of her sex. Filling his hands with her ass cheeks, Eli pivoted and pressed her back against the wall.
She lifted her head and confusion filled her brownish-gold stare. “What are you doing? I thought we were going to the…”
Her words trailed off, and her head fell back in a gasp as he rolled his hips, sliding his rock-hard arousal along the seam of her wet center. He looked down at where their bodies connected as he stimulated her without ever entering, rubbing against her most sensitive area. Her fingers dug into his shoulders as he continued rocking against her, over and over again. After several passes, he was coated with her arousal, and he could feel her sex pulsing along his shaft.
“Come for me,” he demanded roughly. “Come on me.”
He saw the muscles of her stomach clench as her hips jerked and her thighs trembled. She clung onto him, and he continued the intimate motion until the final tremor rolled through her.
“Wow,” she breathed as her head fell back against the wall.
“Shower?” he asked.
She nodded, her eyes still closed. “Shower.”
*
Steam billowed from the shower as Eli adjusted the temperature. Mackenzie stood behind him, and her entire body shook. She didn’t know if it was from her last orgasm or her anticipation for the next one.
She couldn’t wait to get him into the shower. Last night when she’d showered solo, she’d pictured him joining her. She’d imagined squeezing fragrant soap into her hands rubbing them together until the gel formed a soft lather, and then moving them all over his body.
She wanted to do that now. Even after the horrific night he’d had, he’d still been the one to pleasure her. She’d tried to make tonight all about him and failed. But failing had never felt quite so amazing. Still, she was back to her original plan. She wanted to take care of him and his needs. She wanted to wash away the tension and tightness in his muscles that tonight had brought.
She stepped around him into the shower and dangled her fingers under the stream before immersing herself in the pounding waterfall until every inch of her skin that had been touched by the water.
When she opened her eyes she saw that Eli was watching her, his stare devouring her with a ravenous gaze. He was eyeing her hungrily like he was a wolf and she was a piece of fresh meat. She felt a low throbbing start between her legs as she took in that predatory look in his eye.
She loved it. She knew that her skin must have been pink from the heat and shining like a mirror from the water. And she knew that her lips were plump from kissing and that her nipples were standing proudly at attention from arousal.
“Eli,” she said softly, and his eyes slowly came back into focus as he looked up and met her gaze.
“I’m getting a little lonely in here,” she said in a suggestive tone.
He sprang into action, entering the shower with speed and agility.
He wrapped her up in his arms and kissed her with power and passion that stole her breath away. His hands roamed all over her body, sliding neatly over her wet skin, like a figure skater with freshly sharpened blades skimming the surface of the ice.
His mouth moved to her neck, kissing his way down to her breasts and licking off the water droplets that had condensed there. As the hard muscle of his tongue swirled around her sensitive, hard nipples, he slid his hand smoothly up her inner thigh until he reached the pulsing V where her legs met. He ran his fingers up and down her seam, trailing barely-there touches over her outer lips and sending thrills jolting through her entire body.
“Mmm…” he murmured against her nipples as he continued to suckle them.
The vibration she felt through his mouth caused her to whimper with pleasure. She could feel another release build in her. It baffled her mind that her body recovered so quickly with Eli. Maybe it was the years of pent-up frustration from being without his touch.
He used his masterful fingers to part her lips and increased the speed and pressure that he rubbed her with. It seemed like her entire body, every single cell, was vibrating with an electric hum now. She felt like she was nothing more than the conductor between two points of contact, that electricity was zooming through her body and filling it with life and energy.
She moved her hips back and forth against his hand, increasing the rhythm and the pressure on her sensitive flesh and speeding the buildup of pressure in her body so that she wasn’t just moving toward climax, she was barreling toward it like a runaway train.
An involuntary cry escaped her, sounding alien even to her own ears. It was so high and desperate, not like her usual voice at all. For some reason that turned her on more than anything else, and her orgasm crashed through her at that moment with a ferocity she hadn’t been expecting.
She realized that she hadn’t been moving toward climax with the speed and power of a runaway train—it was her climax that had been bearing down on her with that unstoppable force, and it then smashed into her, breaking her apart into a million tiny, satisfied pieces.
Mackenzie trembled against Eli’s chest as he moved his fingers in slower and gentler movements until finally, his touches were as light and ephemeral as the brush of butterfly wings on her skin. Her breaths slowed to a shuddering halt, and she had to gasp to get her breathing started up again. Her heartbeat, which just moments before had been racing out of control, was now a contented and steady thump in her chest.
If Eli had not been holding her up, she would’ve collapsed into a trembling pile of goo on the floor of the shower. Her muscles felt like they were melting as easily as a stick of butter left out in the hot sun.
It seemed like she couldn’t trust herself to do anything around Eli, even something as basic as standing on her own two feet. Literally and metaphorically.
Which was fine when, like now, he was there to hold her up with his strong arms. But what was she going to do if she lost him?
She pushed that thought down in her mind and buried it under a thousand layers of denial and arousal. In Eli’s arms, it wasn’t hard to forget about all the harsher realities of life and just revel in the fact that he was holding her, so that’s what she decided to do. Just completely and totally give into the temptation to forget about everything but his arms. And his chest. And his lips. And the pulsing vein in his neck, that she couldn’t resist kissing.
All thoughts receded to the back of her mind as she ran her hands over his bulging muscles and following her instincts she kissed that vein in his neck. She felt his heartbeat throbbing under her lips, and it brought her back from the luxurious afterglow that she had sunk into. She was suddenly full of life. All of the electricity that had just moments before been animating her muscles sprang back into her body, and her hands and lips took on a new frenetic pace as they explored every peak and valley of his body.
She remembered, then, what her intention had been in the first place. What she’d pictured doing with him last night. She reached for the shower gel and lathered it up in her hands and began to massage his tense muscles, covering every inch of him with Irish Spring-scented suds.
When her slippery hands reached his protruding erection, she grasped it firmly and moved her fist up and down his shaft, the sudsy shower gel acting as the perfect lubricant. After a few strokes, she increased her speed, Eli’s breath sped up, matching the rapid pace of her movements.
He was so hard and strong under her grip. It not only turned her on but also made her feel safe and secure in a strange way. It was like a metaphor for his strength, his virility. It was a physical manifestation of how powerful and capable he was.
She was an independent, intelligent, creative woman. She was more than capable of standing on her own two feet, and she’d been doing exactly that for years—but, damn. She had no choice but to admit it to herself: the thought of Eli taking charge, taking care of her…it sent a thrill running through the length of her body that couldn’t be replicated by any other feeling in the world.
Just as she felt his shaft engorge larger than she’d ever imagined he could get, he grabbed her wrist abruptly, disentangling himself from her and stepping back into the heated spray to rinse all of the soapy residue from his body. After rinsing himself off, he pushed the glass door open and reached outside of the shower. When he brought it back in, he was grasping a condom wrapper between two of his fingers.
She watched as he tore open the wrapper and rolled it on and gasped when he grabbed her by the upper arms and spun her around to face the wall. The power in his hands as he manipulated her body like a ragdoll caused a gush of wetness between her legs that had absolutely nothing to do with the water pouring down on both of them from the shower head.
He grasped her hips and tilted her up, causing her to lift onto her tiptoes. When she did, she felt his thick head parting her inner walls with force and power that took her breath away.
He thrust in and out of her over and over, each stroke containing more authority and ferocity than the one that came before.
As his powerful strokes grew stronger and closer together, his fingers dug into the flesh of her hips, guiding the speed of their joint rhythm. Faster than she would’ve thought possible, she felt another raging orgasm build deep within her belly. It was all-consuming, like a tidal wave crashing over her.
Eli’s arm snaked around her belly and pulled her to his chest as she came, and the tension in his rock-hard pecs and the way that he grunted in her ear told her that she wasn’t alone in cresting that mountain. She had brought Eli right along with her.
She sank into his strength and let herself revel in the feeling of being completely cared for, loved, and protected. She banished all thoughts of the future and the past from her mind. Tonight she was surrendering to this. Surrendering to Eli.