Chapter 9
‡
A sharp stab of pain hit Eli in his ribs and his eyes shot open.
“Look alive, Bishop.” Jake Maguire’s voice boomed.
It took Eli a second to acclimate himself. Through his bleary vision, he made out the chief standing at the end of the common table. When he glanced to his left, he saw Marco sitting beside him. His friend elbowed him once more and lifted his chin, signaling Eli to sit up. He straightened from a slouched position and stretched his arms in front of him.
“I know we’re all tired but the faster I can get through this the faster you guys can be dismissed.” The chief directed his comment in Eli’s direction.
Eli did his best to keep his eyes open and listen as he continued debriefing the crew who had been on the line fighting a twenty-seven-acre fire for the past three days. He wasn’t the only one that was struggling to stay awake. The rest of the guys seated at the table looked to be having a hard time, too.
Jobs like this one always took their toll on him and every other firefighter. Being on a hose for hours on end with your only rest coming from short cat naps on cots at base camp was physically taxing. Add to that the volatile conditions, where every time you think you’ve gained ground you get pushed back, were equally emotionally draining. But that was the job and he loved it. However, this particular job had been especially difficult.
He’d been distracted. For most people, being distracted on the job could end up with mistakes that could cost them their jobs. For Eli, being distracted could cost people their lives. So he’d worked hard to keep his focus on the blaze.
His mind kept drifting back to Mackenzie. She was not a married woman. She was divorced. He’d turned that tidbit of information over and over again in his mind and concluded that as happy as he’d been initially, he still wasn’t sure if that changed anything. And that was depressing as shit. Still, he knew that he wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders and wasn’t about to throw in the towel until he’d had some sleep and decent food.
The door opened and Audrey entered with coffees and pastries. The entire room exploded in cheers, applause, and whistles. Eli noticed that her eyes found him and a faint blush rushed up her cheeks as she grinned and set down the refreshments.
As the rest of the animals around the table jumped to devour the coffee and croissants like a pride of lions attacking fresh kill, Eli remained in his chair. He needed to sleep when he got home. He had to get his head on straight so he could figure out his next move with Kenzie. Intuitively he knew that this was a once in a lifetime chance to either make things right or put the final nail in the coffin of their relationship. One misstep, one mistake, one misunderstanding and he could kiss any chance of a future goodbye, with the only woman he’d ever seen a future with.
Audrey rounded the table with a lidded white paper cup and handed it to Eli. “I made a half caff, just in case.”
“Thanks.” Eli smiled as he took it from her.
“Hey, where’s my special delivery?” Marco chimed in.
“I’ve got your special delivery right here!” Randy, the engine driver, called out from across the room.
She grinned, and he watched her blush deepen. “I’m glad you guys are back safe and sound.”
He wasn’t sure if she was blushing because Marco put her on the spot or because of Randy’s crass comment or something completely unrelated.
“It’s a good day,” Marco said as he leaned back in his chair, its front legs lifted off the ground.
“It is,” Eli seconded.
She lifted her hand in a small wave before she headed back out.
Marco leaned over and lowered his voice as he watched Audrey leave. “Why didn’t you ever close that deal? I thought you two were going to hook up after the Fire and Ice Ball last year.”
“We’re friends.” Eli wasn’t big on talking about his personal life, not that there’d ever been much to discuss.
“I think she wants to be more than friends.” Marco tilted his head toward the cup of coffee that Eli held.
Eli ignored the insinuation.
He’d danced all night with Audrey at the annual fundraiser, he’d even driven her home, but when she’d asked him if he’d wanted to come in for a drink, he’d told her that he was tired. For a split second her face had dropped in disappointment, but she’d quickly recovered. As much as Eli liked Audrey, he knew that there was no future there and there was no way he wanted to waste her time or hurt her by leading her on.
Once he realized that sleeping his way into forgetting about Kenzie was about as effective as putting out a fire with spit, his social life had come to a screeching halt. Apart from the occasional one-night stand with a tourist, he’d been celibate.
“All right!” Jake clapped his hands together, regaining everyone’s attention after the momentary interruption. “Last order of business, we’re going to have some new faces around here. You all know that we’ve been spread thin lately, and you’ve all been doing a great job picking up the slack and working overtime, but things are only going to get busier over the next few months.
“So this week we have a few new guys coming on. One volunteer and two new hires. The new hires are both transfers. One from Reno and the other is coming from Bakersfield.”
The door opened again. This time the woman that walked through it woke him up a lot more than caffeine ever could. Gabe Maguire entered the common area followed by Theo and Kenzie. Eli’s eyes immediately locked on her.
It had only been a few days since he’d left her staring after him in confusion, but it felt like years. And since he’d gone years without seeing her he knew he had a reference to base that comparison on. Every muscle in his body tensed at the sight of her. A tension that only she’d ever inspired coiled in his chest and gut. When he was a teenager, he’d naively thought that reaction was typical. But he’d learned now that it wasn’t.
He’d never taken for granted that what they’d had was special, but he hadn’t known how uncommon it was. Now he knew. What he felt for Kenzie, what they’d shared, wasn’t something that came around twice. It was once in a lifetime. She was his once in a lifetime.
Kenzie’s eyes scanned the room, a polite smile in place. When her gaze met his, he saw her breath halt, and he grinned. Color blushed on her porcelain cheeks as her smile transformed from sociable to private. Seeing that he could still affect her felt like a victory in a battle he’d been waging for over a decade. He may not have won the war, but he’d take a win where he could.
“Right on time.” Jake slapped his cousin on the shoulder, drawing Eli’s attention. Pride filled the chief’s voice and expression. “This is my little cousin Gabe Maguire. Some of you might know that he’s in town training with Lucky. You all probably know him as a badass MMA fighter, but for the past four years, he’s been a firefighter/paramedic out in Boston. During the time he’s here in Hope Falls, he’s graciously agreed to volunteer to help us out until we can bring on new people.”
Jake motioned behind him to Kenzie and Theo. “Gabe is also the subject of a documentary that’s following his return to the cage. This is Mackenzie Sutton and Theo Billings. We just got approval from the city that they can include Station 8 in the film. It’s up to each of you individually if you want to participate in the film or not. If you do, there are releases that need to be filled out.”
The chief continued talking, but Eli zoned out when he glanced back at Kenzie. Her attention was focused on Jake, which allowed him to study her in a way he hadn’t been able to since she’d come back into his life.
Her blonde hair was down and falling in soft waves over her shoulders. Her large, amber eyes and plump, red lips were so seductive he had to shift in his seat because his jeans were growing tighter. If he didn’t get himself under control before this meeting wrapped, the walk out was going to be embarrassing, to say the least.
*
As Theo made his way around the room handing out releases, Mackenzie couldn’t help the smile that had spread across her face from seeing Eli in the flesh. She was doing her best not to stare as Jake introduced her and Theo to the crew seated at the conference table but that task was turning out to be more challenging than The New York Times Sunday crossword.
He was alive. He was safe. He was home. She knew all of those things before she walked in this morning, but seeing them verified with her own eyes was a relief.
The past few days had been torture, not just because of the strange conversation she and Eli had had right before he left. Also because in all the years that they’d been apart, she’d worried about him, but it’d been in the abstract. The danger had been conceptual. Seeing him drive away and knowing that he was headed toward a threat that could kill him was a very different beast.
Luckily, she’d been privy to constant updates because all the firefighters at Station 8 worked out at Lucky’s Gym and green shift had been holding things down here while blue and yellow shift worked with Cal Fire. There was a steady flow of news about the crew that was on the Highway 89 fire. There’d been several setbacks and even with aerial support it had been a monster to get contained. Deanna and the rest of green shift had been out to the base camp several times with equipment and supply deliveries.
Mackenzie had asked about “the crew” each time, but not about Eli specifically. It was obvious that Deanna had questions about what had happened between Mackenzie and Eli, but she hadn’t outright asked her about it. Mackenzie hoped she never would.
In the three days since she’d seen Eli, Kenzie had replayed their conversation over in her head about a million times. It was on a constant loop in her mind. She’d dissected every word he’d said and how he’d said it. She was, after all, an observer of people.
She still hadn’t been able to puzzle together how he’d known that she was married. Deanna seemed to have no idea, so it couldn’t have been through her. They’d been out of touch for a long time, so that wasn’t surprising. But it still left the “how did Eli know that she’d been married” question unanswered.
“Does anyone have any questions?” Jake asked before he quickly followed up with, “No? Good. Sign the paper and get out of here. Blue shift, get some rest. I want you fresh as daisies when you get back here. Green shift, your assignments are on the board. Dismissed.”
A rumble of talking proceeded. Jake walked around with his cousin and introduced him to the guys that he hadn’t met yet and Theo was collecting the releases as they were signed. Kenzie stayed where she was.
Gabe Maguire was a very attractive and sexy man who was known for his magnetism. He had charisma in spades. Besides being in peak physical form, his striking green eyes, easy smile, and deep voice, he had a way of connecting with whomever he was talking to, making them feel like they were the center of his universe. When he was in a room, he was the flame that drew people in like a moth. Mackenzie had watched this phenomenon happen at least a hundred times over the last year. Women wanted to be with him and men wanted to be his best friend.
When Jake and Gabe got to Eli, he stood and shook the fighter’s hand. She covertly watched the two men interact. Even in the face of Gabe’s undeniable appeal, and surrounded by a room filled with alpha males, Eli dominated the space he inhabited. He had an air of masculinity and security that other men recognized and respected. Women noticed it too, but she tried not to think about that.
She watched as Gabe stood taller as the two met. It was a minuscule change in his body language, but it made Kenzie grin. It was the same reaction that adults had had to Eli even when they were kids. Teachers, principals, and coaches alike had always straightened their posture and given Eli direct eye contact.
Growing up around politics, she’d known people that had “respect” but hadn’t earned it. At a very early age, she could spot fake people whose agendas were selfishly motivated and who gained power through scheming, lying, and hurting others. Her father was a prime example. Eli, on the other hand, was always honest and had a compulsion to be in service to others. She liked to tease him about being cocky, but the truth was, he had an innate confidence that shined like a beacon on a foggy night.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jake and Gabe move on and Eli started walking in her direction. Her cheeks warmed from his stare, but she didn’t dare allow herself even a glance his way. If she did, she was scared she’d be reduced to a puddle on the ground. As he stalked toward her, she felt something she hadn’t felt since she was a teenager. Butterflies. Her palms dampened and she wiped them as inconspicuously as she possibly could on her jeans.
She’d known that there was a good chance that she’d see Eli today so she’d put on a few coats of mascara, some lipstick, and she’d blown out her hair. Generally, during shoot days she wore a hat or had her hair in braids, a ponytail, or up in a bun. It was so baby fine that the fly away situation was out of control if she didn’t blow it out properly and use products, and who had time for that during production? No one, that’s who.
When he stopped directly in front of her, she looked up into his crystal-blue stare and all of the nerves that had been building inside of her like a volcano about to erupt evaporated.
She hadn’t allowed herself more than a quick glance in his direction since she’d arrived and even that had been from across the room. Now that he was up close and personal and she was really seeing him, every nurturing cell in her was flashing with alarm. It’d only been a few days since she’d seen him last but he looked noticeably thinner. His dark hair stood out in sharp contrast to his complexion that was usually a natural tan but now looked sallow and pale. The blue of his eyes appeared even more vibrant with the bloodshot red surrounding them. He’d obviously showered, but he still smelt faintly of smoke.
“You look…” Mackenzie was struck speechless.
“You look—”
“Like shit?” he finished.
“Exhausted,” she said pointedly. “I was going to say exhausted.”
The right side of his mouth turned up in a lopsided grin. “You look beautiful.”
“I’m serious,” she countered.
“So am I.”
A feeling of déjà vu washed over her at the same time the other side of his lips turned up into a full-fledged smile. It was the cocky one that she’d always pretended that she didn’t like, but in truth she’d always found it sexy and endearing.
They’d had this exact conversation more times than she could count. Verbatim.
During their teen years, Eli went a thousand miles an hour and never slowed down. She was always worried about him because he wasn’t getting enough sleep between his part-time job, football, baseball, or whatever sport he was playing, and his active school schedule, and she’d say he looked tired, or exhausted, or sick and he’d say she looked beautiful. Then she’d say she was serious and he’d say so am I.
“Hey, neighbor. I told you I’d see you around.” Marco appeared beside Eli.
Mackenzie wasn’t sure how long they would have stood like this, staring at each other in silence, if they hadn’t been interrupted. But now all of the warmth that had been in Eli’s crystal blue eyes turned cold as his gaze cut to Marco.
“You two know each other?” Eli’s tone was as icy as his stare.
Marco’s brow furrowed slightly in confusion before his expression morphed into amusement. “I think the question is, how do you two know each other?”
“Eli was my neighbor growing up,” she explained as a knee jerk reaction, from back when they were teenagers and people would ask if they were more than friends.
It struck her then that it didn’t matter how many years had passed, it was so easy to slip back into old patterns.
“Ah, I see.” Marco nodded in understanding as his eyes darted between them and added, “So you two are neighbors. Got it.”
She was about to argue that they weren’t neighbors anymore but the truth was, she was staying in a bungalow on his property.
“It was nice seeing you again.” Marco’s tone was formal as he bent at the waist and bowed slightly, then he pursed his lips and whistled as he walked past her.
“Is that…?” Mackenzie searched the hard drive of her memory to place the familiar tune.
Eli solved the mystery. “The Mr. Rodgers’ theme song.”
Mackenzie couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Marco thinks he’s a comedian,” Eli remarked dryly.
“Maybe he missed his calling.”
“No.” Eli shook his head. “He didn’t.”
That made Mackenzie laugh harder. She was enjoying the easy rhythm of conversation that they were having when everything shifted. One moment they were talking casually and the next, the intensity between them rocketed up to the stratosphere.
Eli’s knuckles brushed along her forearm leaving a trail of tingles as he gritted out, “Damn, I’ve missed hearing you laugh. I’ve missed you.”
Feeling his touch and hearing the words she’d dreamed of hearing him say for so long caused her knees to buckle slightly.
“Kenz!” Theo called out.
She blinked out of her trance and turned to see her friend waving her over. They were supposed to be meeting with Jake to go over the logistics of what they would be allowed to shoot when Gabe was on the job.
Her arm was still prickling from where he’d touched her when Mackenzie looked back at Eli. “I’ve got a meeting.”
Eli nodded, and Mackenzie had to stop herself from throwing her arms around him and hugging him goodbye. She rushed away before she gave into her inappropriate and ill-advised urge.
“So that’s who all this is for, huh?” Theo asked under his breath as they followed Gabe and Jake into the offices.
“What this? Who?” Playing dumb didn’t suit her, and normally Mackenzie did her best to avoid it but desperate times and all that.
Theo lifted three fingers in succession as he said, “The makeup. The hair. Eli.”
Playing dumb was one thing. Outright lying was another. So instead of addressing his observation that bordered on accusation, she just ignored it completely and walked ahead of her friend. She knew that she was only prolonging the inevitable talk that she and Theo would be having, but maybe by then, she’d know how to explain what was going on between herself and Eli…of course that meant she’d have to figure it out first.