Chapter Nine
Lia
It’s been three days since Lucian’s last nightmare—that I know of—and my discovery of his addiction to cocaine. By unspoken agreement, we’ve both avoided talking about anything stressful and have just been content to spend some quiet, uninterrupted time together. We’ve watched movies, ordered in most of our meals, and mostly made love leisurely with the occasional round of hard fucking thrown in for good measure. I’m looking forward to starting my day with the hard variety of his loving when he walks out of the bathroom with a towel riding low on his hips, causing me to almost swallow my tongue. Holy mother¸ will the sight of him, especially half-dressed, ever not affect me like this? No matter how many thoughts or concerns are churning in my head, my body still tingles with awareness. I go to him, wrapping my arms around his still-damp body. He smells like soap, aftershave, and sexy male. God, I just want to lick his hard chest. His hands settle on my hips, pulling me snug against him, and I feel his cock stir. Obviously, I’m not the only one wishing we were still in bed this morning. “Good morning, baby,” he says in his sexy, husky morning voice I love so much.
“Morning,” I reply absently as my hands wander of their own accord up and down his back. As I reach the crease of his ass, I hear his breath hitch and smile. I’m tired, but I would love to feel his tongue between my legs this morning. It seems to be the magic cure for helping me keep the blues at bay.
He pushes his morning erection into me before pulling away. “You don’t know how much I hate to say this, but you have your doctor’s appointment in less than an hour, so don’t start anything we can’t finish.”
My mouth drops open in disappointment as I sputter, “What? But, I want to—”
“Yeah, me, too,” he interrupts as he smacks my ass. I follow his gaze down to the tent he’s pitching in the front of his towel.
“Babies, kittens, and bunnies.”
He looks at me as if I’ve lost my mind. “Just repeat babies, kittens, and bunnies over and over and it’ll help you with that,” I say, pointing downwards.
He chuckles before dropping his towel suddenly and palming his length. “Thanks for the suggestion, but I think I know a faster and much more pleasurable way to handle my problem.” Wiggling his brows, he adds, “Emphasis on handle, of course.” I stand rooted in place as he walks back into the bathroom, not bothering to shut the door. “Be right back.”
“Er…um…okay,” I manage to croak out. As I shift uncertainly, squeezing my legs together, I try to tell myself that he doesn’t want me to watch, but the devil on my shoulder keeps shouting, ‘he left the door open!’ Finally, I can resist no longer, and I creep to the open door. He’s sitting on the shower seat, leaning against the wall as he works his cock in his fisted hand. His moan fills the bathroom and I freeze. Oh, shit, it wasn’t him, it was me! My face is bright red when he opens his eyes and sees me standing there gawking at him.
He gives me a sexy grin as if he’d been expecting me all along. Pumping his hips in my direction, he growls, “Screw the hand job. Come fuck me, baby.” I’m so wet and horny that I don’t need to be asked twice. I go to him, taking his hand as he helps me into the shower. I stand hesitantly before him until he takes me by the waist and lifts me over his hips and impaling me onto his shaft. We both shout as he penetrates me deeply before lifting and dropping me repeatedly. My body struggles to adjust to his girth, but the pleasure far outweighs the discomfort I feel from his size.
When he leaves me seated deeply on him to take my nipple in his mouth, I moan, “Luc! Oh, God, Luc, please…” Ignoring my pleas to move again, he insists on sucking and licking both nipples before moving on to my neck and earlobe. I never knew an ear could be an erogenous zone until Lucian’s tongue and teeth first showed me it was a direct link to my clit. I begin bouncing my hips against his, needing the friction of his cock, prompting him to take command once again. Instead of lifting me, he pulls me down while grinding his hips upwards. He’s so deep inside me that twinges of pain mingle with the pleasure, causing me to spiral quickly toward my release.
“More,” I pant, so close to the edge. My nails are raking his back as I reach for the pinnacle that he is keeping just out of range with shallow thrusts of his hips. Taking handfuls of his hair, I tug it sharply, snapping, “Dammit, Luc, fuck me!” His growl of approval fills the shower as he surges upward, rubbing against my magic trigger spot, causing me to spasm around him without warning. “Ahhh, too much!” I cry as my orgasm seems to go on and on.
“Lia, fuck!” he shouts as I feel him release into me. “Fucking hell,” he groans as we both collapse against each other. “I can never get enough of you,” he murmurs absently as he rubs soothing circles against my sweaty skin.
“Me, either,” I admit, not really knowing if he expected an answer, but helpless to deny it. We sit still joined for a while before he gently pulls my body off his. I groan, feeling my swollen tissue clinging to his semi-hard length. No part of me ever wants to be apart from him, it seems.
He turns the shower on, causing us both to gasp before the water turns from cold to hot. Shivering, he laughs. “I think we both needed that blast.” I hold my arm with the cast to the side as he washes me quickly and helps me from the shower before turning to wash himself. I remove my soaked bandages and dry off. The tape holding the splint on my nose is wet as well, but I just pat it dry knowing the doctor will be removing it today. When he steps out, he makes quick work of reapplying fresh bandages before walking once again toward the closet. I wrap a towel around myself before following him.
“Luc,” I call to him, knowing I’m going to have a battle on my hands. When he steps out holding jeans and a button-down shirt, I prepare to present my case. “I want you to go to the office today after my appointment.”
He looks at me as if I’m speaking a foreign language. “Pardon?”
I walk past him to select a loose-fitting T-shirt and jeans from my side of the closet and then return to his side to select one of his expensive power suits. When I hand it to him, he takes it, still looking puzzled. “I want you to get back to your normal routine. You’ve been away from your office for weeks now.”
He is already shaking his head before I finish my last sentence. “No, I’ve got things under control. Aidan is in the office, and we talk several times a day. I can handle things from here fine.”
When he turns with the obvious intention of hanging the suit back up, I grab his arm. “I need for you to do this. I have to try to get my life back, and that’s not going to happen as long as I cower in this apartment.”
“Then we’ll spend the day doing something. What would you like to do?” His handsome face is so eager and sincere that I feel horrible for trying to push him away for a few hours. Not only do I need to attempt to stand on my own two feet again, but Lucian needs it, as well. If I continue to stay behind the safety of these walls with him every day, then I’ll never want to leave his side. He has already given me more security than I’ve ever had before, and I can’t continue to depend on him for my wellbeing. I need to return to a few weeks ago, when he was one of the best parts of my life but not my entire world. We both need to have our own independence again.
I take the jeans and shirt from his hand, leaving him only the suit. Looking up at him, I implore him to understand. “I love you, Luc, but I have to try to shake off the fear and self-pity that have taken over since my attack. If I can’t be alone for a few hours, then how will I ever be able to leave this apartment again by myself? My last semester of school starts soon, and I have to be able to return to my life by then.” He looks so torn by my words. He’s no more ready to leave me than I am for him to go, but I can also see that he understands what I’m trying to say. I know I’ve won, and he’ll leave me for the first time this afternoon. I also know it’ll tear him apart to do so, which makes me love him even more—if that is possible. If I’m being completely honest with myself, I’ll also admit that my bid for freedom today is about helping Lucian return to level ground, as well. Being trapped in this apartment can’t be good for him mentally; he has too much time to think about the past.
He pulls me close, dropping his forehead onto mine. “I don’t want to do this.”
“I know, but thank you. I promise I’ll be fine.”
He curses once under his breath before sighing. “You promise to call me if you need anything at all? Even if you’re just lonely.” I nod, blinking back tears.
“Fuck, Lia, I mean it. I want to hear the words.”
“I promise,” I manage to say, even as I’m choking back the urge to beg him to stay with me. At this point, it seems to be a toss-up as to who will have a panic attack first when we part. I know one thing: if we’re both this emotional already, I need to make our actual goodbye very quick or I’ll break down and he won’t consider leaving me again anytime soon. In an attempt at self-preservation, I pull away and dress before drying my hair and securing it in one of the ponytail holders Lucian has provided. I need to cut up another pair of his underwear and use the waistband as a holder again; I bet that would bring a smile to his face. Maybe tonight, if I’m still holding it together by the time he gets home.
Lucian
I stand next to Lia patiently waiting for her to finish the hug marathon she seems to have going with Sam. This is the first time they’ve seen each other since he drove us home from the hospital. Of course, he has called to check on her daily, as have Cindy, Aidan, and my aunt. “It’s so good to see you, Miss Lia,” he says, clearly doting on her. “You look just beautiful.”
“Thank you, Sam,” she says in that shy way she has. Lia always has a tough time accepting compliments, probably because her bitch of a mother never did anything but tear her down. She has finally gotten somewhat used to my compliments, even though I wonder sometimes if she believes them or just tries to humor me and accept them gracefully now. “I’ve really missed you,” she adds, making Sam literally crumble at her feet. There is little doubt that my driver, and longtime family friend, is completely enamored with her. Her mixture of sweetness and innocence, especially considering what she has survived in her life, is hard to resist. She draws people like a moth to a flame, especially my friends, it seems. I am quite aware that some of them, or maybe all, like her more than me right now.
He opens the door, ushering her in before turning finally to me. “Good morning, Luc. It’s good to see you, as well.”
Giving him a sarcastic smile, I say, “Yeah, I’m sure.” He grins in return, seeming completely unrepentant. He’s been with me long enough to know when I’m kidding. Truthfully, I love the fact that my inner circle is so taken with her. I would never tolerate them being less than courteous to her, so it makes things easier for all concerned. He and I had discussed the agenda for the day earlier. I thought he was going to throw a fit when he found out that he would be dropping me at the office and returning Lia to the apartment…alone. I’m certain he thought I was an insensitive bastard before I assured him that I was only honoring her wishes and didn’t like it any more than he did. I’ve also arranged for a couple of security guards from Quinn Software to screen any visitors to our home. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Sam sits on the street in front of our building until he picks me up later.
The drive passes quickly as we were lucky to miss the normal Asheville downtown rush-hour traffic. I help Lia from the car, settling my hand into the small of her back as we walk toward the modern structure that houses Dr. Patricia Kay’s practice. She has been my physician since I was a child, although I rarely see her more than once per year at my physical. As we approach the reception desk, the bored-looking attendant hands Lia a stack of forms on a clipboard that looks like they will take hours to complete. She seems overwhelmed, but determined, as she takes a seat and squares her shoulders. I see her pen pause when she reaches the section on insurance. I calmly take the pen from her fingers and cross the section out, writing ‘cash’ below it. “Maybe I should have gone somewhere…cheaper,” she mumbles as she looks at the expensive décor surrounding us.
I chuckle as I tweak her nose. “It’s fine, baby. Don’t worry about it.” She’ll be trying to clean the damned toilets in the apartment again to pay for the appointment. I’m going to have to hire a housekeeper before she gets any ideas. She is so fucking adorable sometimes that I wonder how I ever lived before her. The answer there is simple: I didn’t; I existed. Each day for the last ten years of my life was a repeat of the day before. The only thing that really changed on a regular basis was the woman I was screwing. The thought has no more than left my mind when a perfectly-manicured hand lands on my shoulder, causing both Lia and I to look up.
“Luc! How wonderful to see you… at a doctor’s office of all places.” I inwardly wince as my past collides once again with my present. I get politely to my feet and kiss Laurie’s proffered cheek before quickly pulling away. Her blonde hair is carefully styled in the usual sleek bob. She is immaculately dressed in tailored cream slacks and a silk top. Her jewelry is understated but expensive. I recognize the diamond bracelet encircling her wrist and am surprised she hasn’t managed to solicit a new one from someone else by now.
“Laurie, you’re looking well,” I say as I attempt to block her view of Lia. Like most of the women I’ve dated or slept with in recent years, Laurie is a jealous and petty person, and I don’t want her anywhere around Lia.
“Thank you, darling,” she gushes as her nails curl into my arm. I’d love nothing better than to tell her to fuck off. I abhor small talk, especially when it’s with someone who I’d be happy to never see again. She is doing her best to dart her eyes behind me at Lia. The office is almost empty, so it seems obvious that she and I are here together. “I hope everything is okay,” she says in a voice full of false concern. I feel the crazy urge to tell her that I’m here about my genital herpes but figure instead of having a little fun at her expense, she’d go screaming it in the streets at the top of her lungs. Damn, it would be fun to see her go off the rails for a bit, though.
With a perfectly blank expression that doesn’t encourage questions, I say, “I’m fine.” The irony of that answer isn’t lost on me. Of course, she didn’t specifically ask me if I was messed up in the head or snorting coke like fucking Pez lately, so it’s not technically a lie. She has now given up all pretense of being discrete and has moved to the side to look directly at Lia, who I see as I turn around is also looking at her with rapt curiosity. No doubt, she remembers Laurie’s name as the person I last dated before I met her. When Lia starts smoothing her hands over her ponytail and looking down at the stack of papers on her lap, I know I’ve hurt her feelings by not making the introductions. She thinks that I’m ashamed of her, which couldn’t be further from the truth. The expensively coifed woman on my other side could never hold a candle to the beauty who owns me body and soul. Therefore, I try to control my protective instincts as I extend a hand to Lia and pull her to her feet. I drop my arm around her shoulders and pull her possessively into my body, wanting Laurie to have no question as to our relationship.
“Laurie, this is my girlfriend, Lia.” I see the other woman’s eyes bulge at the title before she manages to get herself under control. Again, I hate the fucking juvenile word ‘girlfriend,’ but if nothing else, it scores a direct hit to Laurie because she knows she was never anything close to that, nor did I address her as such. “Lia, this is an old friend, Laurie.” As Laurie draws up even further, I decide that I’m just an evil bastard today. Maybe Lia’s right, and I have been in the apartment for too long, which is very unfortunate for Laurie.
Lia extends a polite hand to Laurie, who just looks at it as if it’s a snake while sputtering, “Girlfriend? Since when?”
Ah, the fake veneer is off now, and she’s insulted to have been replaced. As she takes in Lia’s appearance, I know the fact that she is younger is the real kick in the ass here. Before I can answer, the door to our right opens and a voice calls out, “Lia Adams.”
I turn my back on Laurie and grab Lia’s purse for her. “I’ll walk you back, baby,” I say before turning back to Laurie briefly. “Take care.” I don’t bother telling her it was nice to see her because we both know it would be a lie. I do get a small bit of satisfaction from seeing her still standing where I left her, looking like someone who just found out her trust fund was empty. Wait…wasn’t this almost a replay of our first date? And they say there is no justice in the world.