Transparent
Keelie
I watch the recording of a student I’m not familiar with use a master key to get into Levi’s locker while, of all people, Maggie Stockton, stood as lookout. The boy who tossed the drugs and paraphernalia inside looked much older than the freshman girl I made a visit to on Friday. My instincts last week were right on, but what she’s into or how deep? I have no idea.
“I knew it.” I put my hands to my hips and let out the breath I’ve been holding. I’m not sure who I was more nervous for—Levi because I didn’t want to believe he would compromise his future, Asa, because for the first time in forever a man is making my insides churn and I didn’t want him to go through this, or relief for myself professionally since I demanded to see the video. “Levi’s a good kid. It just didn’t add up.”
“Can you ID those students?” the officer asks.
“The girl is Maggie Stockton,” I offer.
“Unfortunately, I’d recognize him a mile away. That’s Terry Mosher.” Brett exhales and sounds exhausted even though it’s only lunchtime. “He spent plenty of time in my office over the past two years. He’s skated the line, but we’ve never caught him stepping over it like this.”
“We’re going to need a copy of the video. I assume you’ll keep a copy, for their records?” the officer asked Brett.
“Yes.” My principal leans back in his chair. “This is a mess. Not only have we had five hits this morning, but now we have students setting up other students.”
“Levi seems to get along with everyone. I wonder what he did to be targeted?” I ask.
“I don’t know, but we’ll do everything we can to figure it out. I’ll pull Terry from class. Maggie is Tom’s student, he can get her and we’ll question them separately.” Brett stands and looks to me. “Hollingsworth should stay put in case we have any questions for him, but do you want to deliver the news that he’s clear?”
I smile. “That’s news I’d love to deliver.”
I go back to the conference room where I’m sure Asa and Levi are stressed to the gills. When I open the door, my thoughts are confirmed. Two sets of deep, dark hazel eyes snap to me before I step through the door and close it.
“Well?” Levi’s tone is insistent and demanding.
I try to give him a reassuring smile, but I’m not sure anything can make up for what he’s had to go through all morning. “You’re good, Levi. Video surveillance doesn’t lie. Someone got into your locker.”
The poor guy. His eyes immediately fall right before his head does. He quickly recovers, hiding any emotion, even though he’s justly deserving of it. He nods and looks to his father—his voice thick and laced with conviction. “I told you.”
“You did.” Asa stands and grasps his son’s shoulder and I can tell he’s relieved as well. That is, until he crosses his arms and the air surrounding him becomes so thick, I’d need a machete to break through. His eyes narrow, his beautiful jaw covered in his clipped beard clenches, and it feels as if he’s towering over me when he demands, “Who the fuck did this to my son?”
Wow. Just witnessing Asa Hollingsworth angry and leap into protection mode for his son sends my insides into a flurry of tornadic activity.
Shit, shit, shit.
*****
Asa
Keelie’s eyes get big and she shifts her weight uncomfortably. “Mr. White said he’d like you to wait here so he can speak to you.”
“Tell me who did it,” I demand. Someone just tried to fuck with my son’s future. No way does that happen without consequences. I can’t even try to hide how fucking angry I am.
She shakes her head. “I can’t. Mr. White wants Levi to stay here in case he has any questions. Maybe he’ll divulge who it—”
“I know,” I interrupt. “You’ve said that before—you can’t speak about other students. I get that. But this isn’t girls being mean. Levi’s eighteen. He could’ve been charged, fucking up his future. He has a right to know who it is.”
She lowers her voice, trying to calm me. “I agree.”
“I want to talk to the principal. Now.”
“He’s questioning other students as we speak. I’m not sure how long it will take—”
She’s interrupted when the door opens and the principal is back, this time much friendlier since he knows my son isn’t either doing drugs or dealing them, and offers me his hand again. “Mr. Hollingsworth, I’m glad we got it all cleared up. Levi, sorry you had to go through that.” He takes a seat across from Levi, but there’s no way I can calm down enough to sit right now. “While the police are processing information, I wanted to ask you a few questions. Have you had any issues, disagreements, or problems lately? Anything that would spur something like this on?”
Levi doesn’t even take a moment to think. “No. Not at all. Look, I’m just as sick of high school as the next guy. I want to graduate and move on to college. I hang with my friends and Carissa, that’s it.”
“No one’s holding a grudge against you? In school or even lacrosse?”
Levi shakes his head. “I don’t know why they would.”
The questions continue and Levi has no answers.
Finally, when the principal seems convinced my son has no helpful information, I interrupt, “I want to know who was on that video.”
“I’m sorry.” Brett gets up to leave. “It’s school policy. I can’t discuss other students with you. I need to get back. Ms. Lockhart will see you out.”
I watch the guy leave, shutting the door behind him, and turn to Keelie. Before I open my mouth to demand it, she looks away from me and to Levi when she asks, “Do you know Terry Mosher?”
Levi looks confused. “I think I might’ve had a class with him a couple years ago, but other than that, no. We don’t hang in the same groups.”
“That’s who did it?” I ask, pissed yet surprised, Keelie gave that up.
“A girl was with him,” she adds carefully and her eyes come to me. “Maggie Stockton.”
I tense and she gives me barely a nod. When I look to Levi, I ask, “You have a beef with either one of them?”
Levi frowns. “No. I don’t even talk to them.”
“There’s no denying what’s been done, especially by Mosher,” Keelie says. “Video doesn’t lie and there’s a clear view of the drugs as he tossed them in Levi’s locker. Mosher’s eighteen—my guess is the police will take it from here. His consequences here at school will be the least of his worries.” She gives Levi a reassuring smile. “You’re all good, Levi.”
It’s well after lunch and I’m sure Levi wants to get out of here. “I’m gonna pull Emma from class and take them both home. The day’s almost over. Levi can come back for practice.”
Keelie looks at her watch. “I’m behind on everything, but I’ll walk you out while you wait on Emma.”
Levi doesn’t argue and is up and out of the room before I can say another word. When we all get to the office, Maggie exits another door with her parents filing out behind her. She’s red in the face with swollen eyes from crying and her parents look like they could wring her neck.
“What’s going on?”
I turn when I hear Emma’s voice. She’s got her backpack slung over her shoulder, white knuckling the strap. That’s when I realize she and Maggie have made eye contact. This only makes Maggie hightail it out of the office even faster.
I move next to Emma and pull her into my side. “It’s been a crap day and I’m taking you both home early. I’ll explain when we get out of here.”
We start to leave, but we’re stopped again when from the back hall of the main office, two police officers exit and one is holding a kid by the bicep with his hands cuffed behind his back who looks to be about Levi’s age. The kid doesn’t look happy. I assume this is the asshole, Terry Mosher, who tried to fuck with my son.
Just thinking about the possibility that Levi could be in that position is infuriating. But this thought barely crosses my mind when I realize Mosher is glaring at my kid—but not Levi. I feel Emma tense under my arm as the cops escort Mosher, the whole time his eyes never leave my daughter. Right before they pass us, his glare transforms into a sneer.
When they clear the door, I mutter under my breath, “What the fuck was that?”
Levi looks just as confused and Keelie is staring at Emma. When I look down at my daughter, her expression is laced with fear and panic—but panic wins.
Emma looks quickly between Levi and me. “What’s going on?”
I don’t answer. “Do you know that guy?”
She pulls away from me, close to tears. Desperately, she shakes her head, whispering, “No.”
Keelie asks, “Are you okay, Emma?”
Levi steps closer and lowers his voice. “Em, that guy is bad news. What was that about?”
Forgetting where she is, she takes another step away from all of us and raises her voice. “I don’t know him, I don’t know what that was about—I don’t know anything, all right? I don’t even know why you’re here!”
I notice the ladies behind the desk watching the show we’re putting on, so I decide to put a stop to this. “We’ll talk when we get home.” I still can’t believe the way the day has unfolded, so I turn to Keelie. “I’ll call you.”
She gives me a small nod and I direct Emma to leave with Levi following. How I’m going to get to the bottom of this, I have no idea.
*****
I cross my arms and lean back against the counter in my brand-new but very plain kitchen as I watch the tears well in my daughter’s eyes once again. This time, they’re tears of pure frustration.
She throws her arms out to the side and yells at me, “I don’t understand why I’m the one being interrogated when they found drugs in Levi’s locker!”
“You think I wasn’t interrogated? I fucking was, Em. By the police and Mr. White!” Levi blurts from where he’s standing off to the side.
“Enough.” I look to Levi and half-heartedly add, “And stop with the fucks.”
Levi rolls his eyes and I can’t blame him. After filling Emma in on what happened, she was shocked, as she should’ve been. Over the last few months, aside from being quiet and pulling away from us, I’ve never seen her like this. Now she’s agitated—almost in a frenzy—and bordering on hysteria. When I started asking her about Terry Mosher, she was more insistent than necessary she knew nothing about him.
If I hadn’t seen her hide out in her room every minute of the day she wasn’t in school, I’d seriously be worried she’d gotten herself into some bad shit. But there’s been no time for her to get into anything. Basically, she’s transparent but she’s not.
This is making her lash out. “You’re not a cop anymore, Dad. You’re not working with the CIA, or even Crew and Grady. I have nothing to tell you, and even if you want to stand there and ask me all day, I know nothing!”
“Emma.” I lower my voice. “Drop the attitude. Something happened in that office. I saw it, your brother saw it, and I’m pretty sure Keelie saw it. That kid was caught with a master key to the lockers and your ex-best friend was playing lookout for him when he was setting your brother up to be arrested for possession of drugs and paraphernalia. Yet when he walked by us today, he didn’t give your brother the time of day, but instead glared at you like you were expected to read his mind. I wanna know why that is.”
“Of course, you do.” The tears fall from her face. “You’re used to demanding all kinds of things and getting them, aren’t you? Well, guess what? I have nothing to offer. I don’t know why that guy glared daggers at me. He’s obviously a drug dealer—I doubt anything he does makes sense. But here you are, yelling at me because of the way some slimeball looked at me.”
I sigh and shake my head. She has no idea what yelling is. “I’m not yelling at you, baby.”
“I’m going to my room. Leave me alone!” She swipes the tears from her face and runs from the kitchen.
I drop my head and close my eyes. Either Danielle’s been hiding the dramatic shit from me for years or I suck at parenting worse than I thought.
“She’s probably on her period.”
I look up and Levi isn’t amused, but looks as drained as I feel. I shake my head and mutter, “We can only hope that’s all it is.”
Levi stands and grabs his backpack, starting out of the kitchen. “I’ve got homework to do before practice.”
The next thing I know, I’m alone. Alone in my new kitchen that looks as desolate as the rest of the house. I bought enough furniture to sit on and eat at, but besides letting the kids go crazy and outfit their rooms, that’s it. This house is nowhere close to being a home despite me trying to provide one for my kids.
I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket and when I pull it out, it’s Crew. I rushed out in the middle of a training session with the men when I got the call from Levi.
Crew – Everything okay?
I shake my head as I respond, filling him in on what happened. Okay is a strong word these days and I’d say we’re far from it. Fuck, I’d give one of my offshore accounts for everything to be okay.
Crew – Grady and I have things covered. Take care of your kids.
I slide my phone into my pocket, wishing I knew how to do that before I open the fridge. Staring at the contents wondering what I can put together to make a meal, I pause.
I shut the fridge and go straight to my office where the file is sitting on top of a pile of papers. Opening it, I sit and start to read through. I don’t even know what I’m looking for—I’ve memorized the contents after reading it five times already.
Rereading her background isn’t going to make her divorced instead of a widow. Or change the fact Knox and Saylor—who seem like good kids—have been left without a dad. And reading it a sixth time isn’t going to change what I now know about her financial situation, which isn’t terrible, but it isn’t what it should be had her now dead husband not left her in a pile of debt she had to pay off with his insurance policy. Now she’s living with no savings on a counselor’s salary, which isn’t enough to maintain a property worth as much as hers, which is a fucking lot. It should be with the views, that land, and the size of her house.
Learning all this didn’t satisfy my curiosity of Keelie Lockhart. If I had a hundred questions before, learning all this only multiplied that tenfold.
I have enough issues. I already have two kids of my own I hope not to fuck up on a daily basis, though right now, I’m pretty sure I’m fucking something up.
Last night when I read the report for the first time, it surprised me, but I thought I could handle it.
Today?
I’m not sure what I can handle today.
I finish reading her file for the sixth time before putting it back in the folder and tossing it in the bottom drawer of my new desk.
I need to feed my kids and figure out what the fuck is going on with Emma. It’s all I have the mind-space for right now.
*****
Keelie
Standing at the end of my lane waiting for the kids to get off the bus, my phone beeps. Just when I hear the big yellow beast coming through the trees, I look down at my screen and my insides do that thing again that I’m getting used to. It was so foreign at first, I wonder how I could ever be used to it. It seems all it takes is a text from Asa to make my organs flip and flop like an Olympic gymnast.
I open his text just as the bus comes to a rest in front of me. But instead of flipping and flopping with a whoosh of air, my insides sink.
“Mommy!”
“Hey, mom.”
I look up from my phone and, just like I’ve perfected in the past few years, I put a fake smile on my face for my kids. They deserve a happy mom, even if they don’t know it’s not genuine. “Hi, babies. Come give me a Monday hug.”
They hug me, but at the same time Knox complains, “Mo-om, don’t call me baby.”
I take a deep breath and smile down at my dark-haired son. “Sorry. What can I say? Habit.”
Saylor tears out of my arms and drops her bag as she skips down the drive. “I wanna play with the babies before a-ny-thing!”
Knox runs after her as he yells over his shoulder, “Is Aunt Stephie still coming tonight?”
I smile again, but this one’s harder. And faking it makes me feel all kinds of selfish because I should understand more than anyone. Of all people, I should get it. “Change of plans. I’m staying home. How about we order in Chinese?”
My sweet boy. He doesn’t have to fake anything and shows me how happy this makes him. “Cool.”
I pick up Saylor’s backpack and pull my phone back out of my pocket as I slowly make my way back to the house. Just because I need it to sink in and be over, I torture myself and read his text again.
Asa – Keelie, I’m sorry. I need to focus on my kids without distraction. I made a move with you I shouldn’t have. I appreciate your help today with Levi more than you know. I hope you can understand.
I’m not sure why it stings. I was the one who didn’t want any attention and we weren’t anything anyway. We went to dinner once with our kids. This shouldn’t be a disappointment.
I stop on the lane to text him back—no reason to drag it out.
Me – No problem. I’ll be in touch with you about Emma’s situation.
As I stand here staring at my phone, I see the bubbles and wait for a response, but then they disappear.
They come back, making my breath catch, only to disappear once again.
And that’s it.
Only when I hear Jasmine and the goats greeting the kids am I pulled out of my trance. Well, I can’t spend my life waiting on bubbles. If anyone knows that, it’s me.