CHAPTER SIX

HAZEL

I tossed and turned restlessly until sunlight streamed through the window. The exact opposite of how I slept in Liam's bed, with his arm wrapped protectively around me and his soft breath in my hair. 

Why did I leave again? Why did I jump to the conclusion that he was a cheater just from some random sleeptalking? 

Because it's the obvious explanation. A one-night stand isn't rocket science, Hazel. 

Giving up on sleep, I kicked the covers away and stretched, wincing at the popping sounds in my back. 

The futon in my brother's guest bedroom made my back horribly stiff. Thank God I was only staying here temporarily. 

His wife Dahlia offered me their bed, bless her heart but Ash put his foot down on that suggestion. She was pregnant and needed a more comfortable bed than his sister who had just come to crash briefly. 

Ash was already gone for work by the time I got up and followed the smell of coffee to the kitchen like a zombie. 

The tenderness between my legs amplified the vivid memories of last night. I could still feel Liam's hands all over me and inside me, drawing the sweetest and most intense sensations out of me like an exorcism.

I still wobbled a little on jello-like legs and leaned one hand on the wall for support. 

How unfair that one night with a strange, deceptive man would ruin all of my sexual experiences from here on out. Whoever I ended up with, someone probably safe and boring, would always be compared to my single, exhilarating one-night stand.

With a man who would probably forget my name and call me "Katie" in the heat of the moment if I had stayed for another round.   

As I rounded the corner down the hallway from the guest room, Dahlia and her adorable baby bump stood at the kitchen counter buttering slices of toast.

"Morning, Haze!" she greeted cheerily then shot me an apologetic look. "The coffee is decaf, sorry." 

"Ah, I should have known," I muttered, trying to hide my disappointment. 

"I think Ash left some cold brew in the fridge. He makes a ton so help yourself to it. Do you want me to heat it up for you?" 

"No!" I stopped her on the way to the fridge. "For fuck's sake, Dahlia. You don't have to be such an accommodating host. I can get it myself." 

She laughed as she returned to the counter. "You know me, I always have to be doing something. I'm going crazy now that I'm not at the flower shop all day." 

"Well, you gotta take it easy with my little niece or nephew in there." 

I located Ash's giant pitcher of cold brew and helped myself to a tall glass with milk and sugar. I could already feel how hot it was going to be today. Even though it was only spring in the Central Valley, it would feel like a long, blistering desert summer. 

That was one thing I missed about San Francisco. The bay area would never get above 75 degrees even in the middle of summer and it was glorious. 

"So what are you up to today?" Dahlia asked me. 

"Job hunting, most likely," I replied. 

Or more like trying to job hunt while I daydream about Liam's cock filling me up again.

"Your phone's been going off all morning." Dahlia nodded toward my purse where I hung it up next to the front door. "I heard you come in pretty late. Fun night?" 

"Uh, something like that," I stammered, feeling my face get hot as I practically ran across the kitchen to my bag. 

A mixture of excitement and confusion filled me. I was sure I didn't give him my number. Did I? Was I that drunk and it just slipped from my memory? No, I was definitely sober enough to drive over there and back home. 

"Well, who is it?" Dahlia giggled. 

My face fell when I looked at the screen, my excitement deflating like a balloon. 

"It's my wonderful, adoring mother," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm. 

"Oh, yay." Dahlia's tone oozed even more sarcasm. I couldn't blame her. I wouldn't want my own mother as an in-law either. "Well, at least she's lasered in on you today instead of putting her paws all over my stomach again." 

"This can't be good," I muttered. My mom's texts indicated she wanted to meet up for a girl's lunch. Apparently her friend's daughter, who I went to school with, was also in town and wanted to catch up. 

It sounded innocent enough but that in itself was suspicious. My mother always had some ulterior motive. 

"She's going to auction off my virginity or something," I told Dahlia after reading her texts. "To the bidder with the most money and the most virile sperm." 

"Oh God, stop!" she shrieked with laughter. "That is exactly something your mother would do! I swear she convinced herself I was a virgin until we announced the pregnancy. Even though my due date makes it obvious we conceived before we got married." 

"This woman tried to petition for removing biological science classes from our school district," I said. "Because children need more teaching from God and less bodily obscenity." 

"You're fucking with me." Dahlia's jaw dropped. 

"I wish I was," I said apologetically. "She and modern science are not friends." 

"My God, did she convince herself that the stork delivered you and Ash too?" 

"Probably. She must've gotten high on Ambien before having carnal relations with Dad." 

Dahlia and I howled with laughter over the next few minutes while my phone continued to buzz insistently.

"Damn, she's really not going to let me say no," I sighed. 

"If I've learned anything from marrying into your family, it's to set clear and firm boundaries," Dahlia said. "But also to pick your battles. You haven't seen her since you got back into town and she probably misses you." She ran a light hand across her belly. "I'd miss my daughter too if I hadn’t seen her in months." 

She was right, as much as I hated to admit it. 

"Guess I'll freshen up and get ready," I said, slowly rising from the kitchen table. "Too bad my virginity isn't worth shit anymore."  

"Uh-huh," Dahlia said, eyeballing my wobbly sex gait. "But I bet last night's fun was priceless." 

"Shut uuuup!" I groaned as I shut the door to the bathroom. 

***

Mom told me to meet her at the cute little cafe downtown, Cafe Soledad, just a block from Dahlia's flower shop. I arrived right on time. She was late, of course. 

I perused the brunch menu, my stomach growling. I only had coffee at home that morning and barely ate at all the previous night before I went to the bar.

And then found myself on my hands and knees getting deliciously fucked by the hottest man I'd ever seen. 

Maybe that was why I felt so hollow, so emptied out inside. It'd been at least a year since I had good, satisfying sex and would likely be many more until I had anything resembling what Liam did to me. 

A cute, young waitress, probably a student at the local high school, came up to me with a smile and asked if I'd like to order. Glancing at my watch and then down the sidewalk, there was no sign of my mom so I didn't see the harm in getting started. 

I ordered a savory crepe filled with cheese, spinach and bacon, plus my second cup of coffee for the day.

The food came swiftly, still hot from the griddle, and I was halfway through my plate when my mom finally came through the cafe door with her friend Beatrice in tow. 

And a young man following behind them. 

Fuck. I should have fucking known this would have been a chaperoned date. 

"Hi mom," I greeted with a straight face as I stood to give her a hug. 

"Hazel, did you forget your manners?" she said tensely while eyeing my half-eaten crepe. "Eating before the whole party is here?"

"You told me noon." I glanced at my watch again, which read 12:30 pm. "And I was starving." 

"Well, it doesn't make a very good impression..." 

Only in my mother's world would something as benign as a crepe cause drama. 

"Oh, Phyllis! It's not Hazel's fault we're late." Beatrice swooped in to hug me and save the day. "So good to see you, dear!"

"Do you remember Bea's son, Timothy?" Mom gestured to the young man who followed them in like an obedient puppy. "You two went to school together, didn't you?" 

"I don't recall but, hi! Nice to meet you." I held out my hand for him to shake. He was tall and clean-cut, but rail thin like he hadn't filled out from his growth spurt yet. I had a hunch he was a bit young for us to be in school at the same time. 

"Hazel, I'm Timothy. It's a pleasure." 

Rather than shake my hand like a normal person, he took a light hold of my fingertips and bent stiffly at the waist to kiss the back of my palm. 

Mom and Bea looked on proudly at this display of perfect, chaste gentlemanliness while other patrons openly stared as if we were actors on a stage. 

Horrified, but desperate not to show it, I plastered a huge, fake smile on my face as I retrieved my hand from his grasp and held it close to my chest. 

Dear God, please kill me now. 

I sat my ass back down in my chair despite wanting nothing more than to run out the door. Timothy scurried around the table to pull out chairs for our mothers before seating himself next to me.  

After getting an eyeful of our comedic shitshow, the waitress walked over as casually as could be to take everyone else’s orders. I wanted to ask for a mimosa, or better yet, a whole bottle of champagne to drown in but couldn’t bring myself to make eye contact with her. 

Just after she took their menus and left, Bea stood with Timothy right behind her. 

“We’re going to wash our hands,” she chirped, both of them heading straight for the bathrooms. I wondered if she was going to change his diaper too. 

“Slick Phyllis does it again,” I muttered as soon as Mom and I were alone. 

“Do you have to be so rude, Hazel?” she chided. “This is why I told you she had a daughter, so you’d at least make an effort but you managed to set this off on the wrong foot already.”

“What can I say. I always outdo myself.” 

“Timothy is a perfectly suitable match for you, as long as you don’t spoil your chances. Honestly dear, you don’t have much time left.” 

“Really? Based on what, I wonder? And secondly, I’m twenty-five, not forty!”

My blood was starting to boil. My mother knew exactly how to get under my skin and drive me insane. And the older I got without a ring on my finger and a bun in my oven, the further she drove me to that edge.

“He will be a good husband and provider. Plus he has five siblings so fertility shouldn’t be an issue.” 

Jesus fucking christ…

“But.” Mom leaned in close to me and spoke in a hushed whisper. “You must never breathe a word of cohabiting with another man. Bea knows you were engaged but to protect your virtue, I never told her of your living in sin. Keep it that way or he won’t find you suitable to marry. No one will.”

Speechless, I rested my forehead in my palm and wondered if I was really living in the year 2017. Mom sat up and beamed at Timothy and Bea’s return while I sat mostly silent through lunch, trying not to let her words bother me.

I sat for as long as I could before it became too uncomfortable to bear. With a curt “bye, nice to meet you,” I left the cafe and walked home, trying not to cry. After being cheated on and losing everything, the only thing more demoralizing was hearing my own mother tell me no one would want to marry me. 

Squinting in the sunlight, it looked like someone was sitting on the front porch of Ash and Dahlia’s house. A man in crisp, hipster-style clothes with sandy blond hair. 

As I approached closer enough to recognize him, my stomach did a flip-flop of roiling, mixed emotions. 

“Johnny?”