Charlie

The way that Merle was acting, I was worried that I was right and this was going to turn into a disaster. I had a feeling that she knew who it was, but for one reason or another she was keeping it from me. She didn’t owe me an explanation, not really. We weren’t together and we hadn’t even talked about what we had done the night before. I claimed her in my mind, but that didn’t always mean that it was translated to her.

There was no more time though. We were there and walking in before I could get anything else out. What was I supposed to say anyways? How could I tell her that I wanted her, needed her and even though we didn’t know each other that well, I was sure that she was here in Nome for me? It wasn’t something that I could just bust out whenever I wanted to and it was hard for me to even try and figure out what it was that I needed to say.

Molly exclaimed when Merle came through the door.

“Oh honey, I’m glad you are finally here. We’ve been waiting around for a while now. I thought you were already on the water for the day.”

“No Molly, I was just rolling out of bed. Someone told me that there was someone here to see me?”

Molly pointed to a table and I could see a young man, not much older than Merle sitting there, but his attention was still out the window and he hadn’t realized that the woman he sought was finally here.

“Doug? What are you doing here?”

Merle obviously knew who it was very well because she didn’t even remember that I was next to her as she walked towards the man at the booth. He was standing up and then they were embracing in a hug. I hadn’t walked up with her, so I could see that they were saying something to each other as they hugged. I didn’t like the touch at all and I could feel my rankles getting riled up and I started towards them like I was going to be able to stop the madness.

“I can’t believe that Doug.”

“Well I’m sorry that I had to come up here with that sort of news, but I couldn’t get ahold of you. Did you change your number?”

“No, but service is a joke up here and I just started turning it off. There is no signal but from a few places I have found.”

“Well now you see why I had to come.”

“Yeah, no, thanks. I just don’t know what to say.”

It was all a mystery to me and I was getting frustrated with being out in the cold and having no information. I wanted her to tell me what was going on, but she wasn’t thinking about me at the moment. She was thinking about something else and when she asked him when he was leaving, all of the worry that I had was at the forefront of my mind. All this time I had been so worried about what would happen if she left and now she was.

“Can I talk to you for a minute Merle?”

“Oh Charlie, I am so sorry. I forgot for a moment that you were here with me.”

That wasn’t a good sign. I don’t know what it meant, but I knew that it wasn’t a good sign that she had forgotten that I existed. How could that be good? Why the hell was Merle so much different than the other women I had met in my life, that were dying to be with me and made everything so easy? Women from the lower 48 were just different and she had me feeling some sort of way.

“What’s going on? You’re leaving?”

I hated the sound in my voice. It was too close to desperation as far as I was concerned and I didn’t like the way she made me feel. I felt like I was messing everything up and I didn’t know how to change it. One minute she was here and changing everything and now she was just going to leave? That didn’t seem fair at all to me and I didn’t know how I was supposed to change it.

“Yeah, I have to Charlie. I didn’t see this coming and I don’t know what to say. I won’t be able to dive for you anymore.”

Now I was panicking because she was talking like she was never coming back. Where did she have to go that was going to take her away from me so suddenly?

I wasn’t even thinking about the business and the fact that I had let my two guys go and they were already snapped up by another. I had screwed myself and I at least wanted to know why this was happening.

“Where are you going?”

“I have to go back home.”

The guy was walking back from paying for his bill at the till and I was finally told who he was.

“This is my brother Dougie. Dougie this is Charlie. He is the man I’ve been diving for the last couple of weeks.”

Had it been only a couple of weeks? It felt like longer.

I stuck my hand out and shook his when he did the same. I was happy that it wasn’t an ex-boyfriend, but it didn’t seem to matter who it was because either way she was leaving and it was because of the blonde-haired man in front of me. To me, that was all that mattered and the more I thought about it, the harder I squeezed on his hand before he pulled it away and gave me a dirty look.

“I don’t understand, you aren’t coming back?”

“No, not for a while. My parents got in a wreck and they are going to need me for a while.”

There was nothing I could say to that and all I could do was help her pack and offer my place for her brother to stay the night. They were leaving in the morning and I didn’t even get another taste before she left. With Merle gone, a piece of me was gone with her and I didn’t know if I was going to get it back or not.

Nothing was the same with her leaving. I knew that it wasn’t going to be the same again and every day it got worse and I missed her even more.