Chapter 6
Sophia was not sure how to act around either brother, for fear they might be angry that she had slept with the other. She wondered if Adam knew about Blake. Blake certainly knew about her night with Adam.
But things continued as before. Adam invited her to a party that night, after she met with Marcy. And the next day, she met Blake for coffee after they both finished work.
Blake held the elevator door open for Sophia as they came home. She giggled at some joke he made as she stepped through, her heels clacking on the floor. They had had their usual jog and coffee in Central Park. Now she felt exhilarated and ready for an afternoon making love to him on her couch. It seemed implied that they would make love, right? After all, he was stepping out of the elevator with her, without even asking if he could come in. Surely they would….
Just then, she froze. Standing in the hall were her mother, Angela Garcia, and…Tony. They all glared at her, and her mother’s mouth was open. What was she doing with a white guy? She could see them all thinking that.
“It’s OK they are waiting for me. I’ll call you tomorrow. Good night, honey,” she said hastily, kissing him good night. She glanced at Tony, and noticed how his face hardened. He was a severe-looking man, with piercing dark eyes. He used the look he currently wore to wrench confessions in the courtroom. But it did not work on her after all of these years.
“Come in,” she told her family briskly. Blake lingered by the elevator, clearly confused and put off by Tony’s glare.
“What is going on?” she demanded as soon as the door shut behind her. Her family gathered around her, clearly ready to pounce and make her do their bidding. She had never seen them look so determined. The tension in the room was as thick and hot as stew and she just wanted to make them all leave. She didn’t even want to meet Tony’s eyes, but she was secretly proud that he had seen her with his old neighbor. How jealous he would probably be! It was always him having affairs, but now the tables have turned.
“I am so disappointed in you,” Lupe started off. Her face was lived, her eyes shiny with anger. “What have you been thinking? We are family! And you run off with some gringo?”
Sophia groaned. “That’s just not any gringo. He’s a very successful businessman – much richer than Tony even.”
Tony stiffened and his mother clasped his arm. He was not used to being insulted.
“You have made a terrible mistake, leaving my son,” Angela began. Her voice trembled slightly. “You two were bound by destiny. You were meant to be!”
“Really? That’s funny because that’s actually what he told his mistress on one of his recordings. I heard it all.” Now she fixed Tony with a glare and he just stood tall, clear unperturbed by her anger.
“You are overreacting,” he informed her. “I need you to calm down and think about things.”
“Tony, you even agreed to the divorce. We have signed the papers. What are you even doing here? Is this an intervention?”
“We are worried about you, mija. And we want to stop you from making the biggest mistake of your life,” her mother pleaded. She looked as if she were on the verge of tears.
“I forgive you for leaving me and I am ready to give you another chance,” Tony added.
Sophia wheeled on him. She wished that Angela was not here so that she could slap him across the face. “You forgive me for leaving you?”
“You have a womanly duty to me. You vowed to be my wife till death do us part,” he replied coldly. There was that tone she hated, the tone that meant he would never budge or apologize for anything. He pretended to be as perfect as his dry-cleaned Armani suits and Italian leather shoes and perfectly gelled hair.
“You forgive me. But you can’t say sorry?” Sophia felt herself getting hysterical. She was even shaking. Tony’s coldness always made her want to scream. If anything, that attitude was more responsible for their divorce than the cheating. He never admitted to any wrongdoing and framed everything to be her fault somehow. She spent most of the marriage feeling low and slighted, like a terrible person who was wrong for everything.
“And you vowed to do the same. But you are the one who stepped out on me. You are the one who left me.” Sophia had to fight to hold back tears. She was shaking with rage. Her vision was narrowing into a tunnel, as she began to develop a stress headache.
“You need to stop this foolishness and return to the man who loves you. Look at him. He loves you!” Angela raised her voice. She was gesturing eagerly to her son. Like most Hispanic mothers, she had a special affection for her successful first son, and in her eyes, Tony could do no wrong.
Their tight relationship was another source of unresolvable conflict in their marriage. Tony was always telling his mom personal things about Sophia – embarrassing things! Like her trouble conceiving and her female problems. It often felt as if everything she told him ended up in Angela’s ears, and subsequently her mother’s. She learned early on not to tell Tony things. So much for a loving, trusting marriage.
“I want you to be happy, mija, and you are lying to yourself right now. This is not God’s way. You need a man, a happy family. A woman should not be alone in this city.” Lupe gazed around the penthouse, her face wrinkled in sadness. “You are throwing something wonderful away and we mothers have had it. We are here to bring you back to Tony.”
“You can stop being stubborn now, Sophia,” Tony added.
“Stubborn?” She gasped with shock. “Is that what you are calling it?” Then she whipped on her mother. “And how is this not God’s way? Tony lived here. He worked. Now I am in his place. I think this is God’s way. It’s my way. I paved my way and I am successful, even if you can’t see it.”
“You don’t need to do all of this. You can go back to the house in Long Island and let me take care of you. I know you preferred that. You could go get your nails done every week at that salon you liked and go out with your friends,” Tony went on.
He spoke as if Sophia had led a life of leisure and luxury with him, when in reality she slaved away cleaning the house without a maid and she never went out with friends because Tony was too jealous. Sometimes she got her nails done, as a way to unwind after a long week of cleaning toilets and keeping the house in the immaculate condition that Tony expected. He had nearly lost his mind when she had decided to go to school but he decided to humor her. He had even footed the bill and smirked when she talked about her classes. She was expected to still have the housework done by the time he returned from work if he even came home. Sophia decided to say so. “I gave everything to you. I didn’t go get my nails every week and I certainly didn’t go out with friends. I was trapped in your home it felt like, working away, cleaning up your messes and cooking. I couldn’t even go out while you were always gone.”
“That is what a wife is expected to do,” Angela snapped.
“You act so spoiled! Mi Dios!” her mother cried. “I raised you better than this, my child.”
“You would rather work than clean?” Angela tsked. “What is wrong with you? My son works hard. He is a good man. He will give you everything and he has given you everything. Why must you keep taking from him and being so stubborn? You have hurt him. Look at his eyes!”
When Sophia looked at him, she did not see any hurt. Only coldness. He was a chiseled man, handsome, but also hard as stone. He pretended to be perfect and could do no wrong. And that included ever expressing any emotion. To him, emotion made him weak. He clung to his masculine pride with an infuriatingly tight grip. Perhaps if he had broken down and pledge his love for her, swore to be faithful, and begged her to come back, perhaps then she might have reconsidered. But he never did any of that, not even once since she had left him. And now it was too late.
She steeled herself as she looked away from his stony face. If he would be cold, then she would be the same. “I am sorry if I have hurt Tony, but he has hurt me more,” she replied with coldness.
Tony snorted. “You are very stubborn, Sophia. That is a fault you need to work on if you want to be happy in life.”
“Do you think I care how you feel?” Angela spat. “This is my son! You are his wife!”
“Not for much longer,” Sophia replied.
“Mom,” she snapped, then she took a deep breath and shut her eyes as she felt the relaxation filter through her body from her deep inhalation. “Mom. I have had enough. I have had enough of all of you.” Then she opened her eyes and fixed them on Tony. “Especially you. You are…you are something else. And I want all of you out. I am done with this marriage and I am done being told what to do and who to be. I know you don’t understand me, but this is the life I want. And I don’t care if it is not my womanly duty or God’s way. It is what I want. I am a modern American woman. So please leave.” She opened the door and indicated for them to leave.
They all gasped and exchanged looks. Tony was the first to regain his composure. Without even a backward glance, he stormed out, unwilling to lower his pride any more for Sophia. He was not the kind of man to chase a woman. He only cared about himself. Angela and Lupe shuffled out after him, refusing to look at Sophia and muttering to themselves in shock about what a horrible and cold-hearted person she was. They did not even say good-bye to her. But her mother did yell one last thing about how she was a fallen woman and a bad daughter as Sophia closed the door and triggered the alarm system.
She was sure it would be weeks before they would even speak to her again. And maybe longer before she would be willing to speak to them.
Relieved to have the place to herself now, she collapsed on the couch and inhaled deeply. She couldn’t even really feel right now because she had experienced such a storm of emotion just moments before. Then she crossed to the kitchen to get some wine. As the red Merlot filled the glass and the scent filled her nostrils, she heard a knock. She groaned. “What now!” She was pleasantly surprised to look through the peephole and find both Franklin brothers waiting for her on the other side.
“Are you OK?” they asked, as she opened the door.
The brother exchanged odd looks. Then they asked if they come in.
Sophia groaned internally. Was this going to be another confrontation? Seeing Tony’s cold face and his unapologetic attitude had already hurt her enough, not to mention dealing with the combined forces of her mother and mother-in-law. Ex-mother-in-law, that is. She did not think she could handle another ugly ordeal. The expressions that both brothers wore did not bode well, either.
“Take a seat,” she said crisply. Then she began gulping down the wine. She was going to need it to get through this.
“Adam and I heard everything,” Blake began.
“And we know how you’re probably feeling right now,” Adam added.
“I couldn’t believe what Tony said to you. I thought he was a better man than that,” Blake apologized. His eyes were full of genuine empathy.
“I mean, what a pompous prick,” Adam blurted out.
Sophia stared at Adam, unable to believe he had spoken about Tony that way, and then she began to laugh. “That’s so true. He is such a prick. And I can’t believe I let him make me feel so bad.” It was a rush, calling him a prick. Never before had she actually spoken about him with anything but civility and respect. Even when she was furious with him over his mistress, she did not call him names. But it felt good to finally let all her pent-up anger out and blaspheme him for the prick that he really was. That simple word truly summed up everything about Tony!
“Listen, we don’t want you suffering. Especially by yourself,” Blake went on. “We are here for you.”
“Wow. You guys are…amazing.” Sophia sighed. “I guess it’s time to talk about, well, you know, about us.”
They exchanged looks again, which made Sophia nervous for what was to come next. Then Adam started. “That is indeed something we need to discuss.”
Sophia flopped onto an armchair across from them. “I know it has been unfair of me to keep you both on the line. The thing is, I like both of you so much. And I don’t want to have to make a choice.”
“We know that you are going through a rough time and we don’t want to add any more stress. So instead of making you choose between us, we have chosen,” Adam said.
Sophia was taken aback. “Really? And what have you chosen?” What on earth could this be? Who did they settle on? She had an idea that Blake was probably the nice one, conceding her to Adam. But she also hated the idea of them making this choice for her. It was a bit Tonyish of them, to assume what was best for her without asking her first. Wasn’t this her life and her choice?
What they said next blew her away.
“We want to propose something…something pretty unprecedented,” Adam continued.
“Something really unorthodox,” Blake volunteered.
“And if you say no, we understand. No hard feelings. But it is something that we would like to suggest. And it would make things, well, great for all of us. If you are down.”
“What is it?” Sophia demanded. She didn’t have patience for all this hemming and hawing.
“We propose that the three of us enter a relationship,” Blake stated bluntly.
“Not an incestuous one or anything. Blake and I won’t be dating,” Adam added with a nervous laugh. “Just wanted to make that clear that we’re not weird freaks like that. But the two of us will continue dating you. And you will get to be with both of us, at your choosing.”
“No drama. No fighting. You let us know if you want one of us and we will share you. And,” Blake hesitated, “we might be open to all three of us getting together at the, you know, same time. I mean it’s not like we haven’t seen each other naked or anything.”
Sophia sat there in shock. She couldn’t process. Could her dirtiest fantasy, her most forbidden and secret desire, be coming true in real life? Or was she dreaming? This had to be a dream to follow the nightmare of earlier. She almost pinched herself to check if she was really awake. Had her family and Tony finally made her snap, sending her into a delusional psychotic break?
“What say you?” Adam said with another nervous laugh. Both brothers sat on the very edge of her couch, rubbing their hands together in the exact same gesture. Though they looked different and were two years apart in age, they might as well have been twins at that moment. They were both tense with anticipation, like coils ready to snap.
“I don’t know what to say,” she managed finally. “I think I need time to think about this.”
“Sure, sure.” They both nodded and jumped up, heading toward the door.
“I like the idea, don’t get me wrong,” Sophia added, making them both pause. “But…I was raised Catholic. This type of thing just goes against everything I believe in. I…I feel that is so wrong. It’s already been wrong, what we have been doing. This isn’t like me.”
“Sophia, you’re a grown woman and you’re living on your own. You can do what you want. Don’t let the Church or your family or society tell you what to do,” Blake said frankly. “If you want this, let’s do it. It is entirely up to you.”
“I just have to think.” Now she desperately wanted to be alone to process. Having the brothers here was too distracting.
“OK.” Both brothers glanced at each other awkwardly before leaving. It appeared to have taken all of their guts to propose this ménage to her. “You know where we live if you want to talk about this more,” Adam added as a weak joke before shutting the door.
Sophia leaned back in her seat. Her mind was spinning. How could she do this? Wouldn’t she burn in Hell? She glanced at the cross by her door and felt ashamed for all the depravity that it had already been witness to.
And then she thought about her talk the other day with Marcy. “If only you could have both. That would be the life.” She thought back to her filthy fantasies with both men fucking her at once. She thought about the difficulty of choosing one brother when both were so wonderful and perfect for her. She thought about the nuns at school and Tony and her mother, all recoiling and gasping in horror at what was going on in her life.
Too confused to think straight, she decided to go for a run. The pulse of the run, the feeling of her feet slapping the ground, and the brisk air stinging her face helped her focus. She didn’t really think about things as she ran. She just ran, feeling the world around her, feeling her heart rate elevating. She felt the friction of her jogging pants on her legs, and longed for the touch of not just Adam or Blake, but both of them.
When she stopped for breath, she felt rather than thought. And it became clear to her what she was going to do. She knew it rather than decided it. It was crazy and it was bizarre. It was even depraved and horrible in the eyes of the Lord.
She had already broken with tradition in the past. She had taken a huge leap of faith and had not fallen and died as her mother had predicted. Maybe everything else she clung to was also bogus that she could safely discard.
It couldn’t hurt to at least try it, right? No one had to know. This was her personal life.
Maybe Marcy would know, but no one else would. Marcy would be thrilled. She would cheer Sophia on, secretly wishing that she had this experience for herself.
She was going to do something that she had never imagined herself doing.