Given the ungodly early hour, I knew only one person could be the cause of my buzzing phone. Blindly, I reached for it and cracked open one eye to see the screen. Yep. My mom. And she wanted to video chat.

I looked over at Avi, making sure the sheet was covering all his bits before I pushed “accept,” then I set the phone down so I could pull on a T-shirt.

“I can’t see you, Laurel! Is this thing broken?”

I picked up the phone again, laughing. “Hey, Ma. I had to set the phone down for a minute. You do realize it’s seven in the morning, right?”

“Of course. We have clocks in New Jersey. Not that you’d know this since you never visit.”

I laughed. She was good with the guilt trips. “Soon, Mom. How about in two weeks?”

She arched an eyebrow. “Can you bring the boyfriend?”

I pinched my bottom lip between my fingers. “Maybe. I’ll ask. But you have to promise to try to be normal.”

“I’ll come,” a sleepy Avi said from behind me.

My mom perked up. “Is he there?”

“Of course, he lives here!”

She gasped. “He lives in your room?”

I snorted. “No, Ma. We had a sleepover.”

“She won’t let me out. Help!” Avi cried.

I slapped his naked chest. “Shush, prisoner!”

My mom sighed. “Oh, you two are so cute. Can’t wait to see you.”

“Maybe Avi and I will make those cookies I promised Lucia and Antonella and I’ll drop them in the mail first thing tomorrow.”

“Oh yes! They would be thrilled. They’re going to croak when I tell them the prince is coming to visit.”

I giggled. Every time I talked to my nieces, they asked about Avi. He’d even made an appearance in a few more video chats. They were as enamored with him as I was. Okay, maybe not quite, but still. They thought he was the absolute shit.

“Okay, well did you have a specific reason for calling this early, or can I go back to sleep?”

She rolled her damn eyes. “No reason, other than to tell you to wake up and enjoy this beautiful day. Get your roly-poly booty out of bed and go for a walk! Spring is almost in the air.”

“Thank you, Mother. I will definitely go for a walk when I’m actually awake.”

“Fine. Be lazy. If I had a man like that, I’d stay in bed too.” In the background, I heard my dad yell, “Hey!”

I hung up the phone and flopped back in bed. Avi wrapped himself around me, and I snuggled into his arms.

“I can’t believe you are bringing me to meet your parents. You must really like me.”

I kissed the underside of his chin. “You’re all right.”

We lay there for a while, falling in and out of sleep, before the sound of my mother’s voice in my head had me rolling out of bed to take a shower to get the day started.

Before I left the room, I turned back to take one last look at Avi. He was stretched across the bed, one arm slung over his head. The sheet rode low, just barely covering him. I was tempted to crawl up his long body and lick my way up his torso. Really tempted. But then he smiled, and I had to hold onto the doorframe for support.

“I feel your eyes on me.”

“You’re really quite the beautiful feast.”

He propped himself up on his elbows and took me in. “I like how you see me.”

I walked over to the bed and ran my fingers through his messy hair. “Who wouldn’t see you like that?”

He sat the rest of the way up and nuzzled his face against my belly. “Not everyone.”

One of his jagged edges was showing. I couldn’t say if it was from Mara, or just life, but I would make it my mission to always let him know I saw him for who he was. Physically, he was breathtaking to me. But it was a lot more than that. I’d say he was beautiful if he lost every ounce of his physical attractiveness. I’d think he was beautiful even if I lost my sight.

“I’m not everyone,” I said.

He tilted his head back to meet my eyes. “No, you’re fucking not.”

Leaning down, I pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. “Come shower with me.”

We finally left the house two hours later, after shower sex, then sink sex. I wanted to keep him locked up with me. I had this strange feeling of dread in my gut, but that was probably those feelings I’d pushed down wearing a hole in my stomach lining. They would have to be dealt with soon. Maybe later. But I wanted to take the next couple hours before he headed to work to be uncomplicatedly in love.

We took a walk to the store. Shockingly, I’d run out of chocolate chips, which I needed for my nieces’ cookies. Strolling through the aisles of the grocery store, kissing every few feet and making each other laugh, we probably made the other shoppers gag. We could have been the only two people left in the world for all I knew. I didn’t notice anyone else.

Once we checked out, we started for the exit when I heard someone say my name. My spine went rigid and every bit of blood drained from my face. I didn’t want to turn around. I wanted to keep going, keep pretending Avi was my world. But he stopped and looked over his shoulder. He’d heard too.

“Yeah, that’s right. I’m talking to you, whore.”

I closed my eyes, bowing my head. No more pretending.

I turned to face her. The words streaming from her mouth didn’t match her pristine appearance. She looked as though she could have been teaching Sunday school in her floral skirt, cardigan, and headband. And Tom stood right behind her, looking like a schoolboy who’d just been dragged by his ear after being caught cheating on a test. Or cheating on his wife.

“I know my husband’s been texting you. I saw it. I told you to stay the fuck away from Tom.”

Monica’s eyes were bloodshot, and the skin around her nose was raw. Her voice sounded hoarse, like she’d been screaming all night. Tom laid a hand on her arm, but she shrugged him off.

“I haven’t—” I started to defend myself, but I couldn’t.

“You haven’t what? Speak, whore!”

I felt Avi next to me, looking back and forth between us, but I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t speak. This was a nightmare—one I caused.

Monica sneered at me. “Have you been ignoring Tom because you moved on to another man to whore with? Where’s this guy’s wife? Home taking care of his kids while he fucks his slut?”

Tears spilled down my cheeks. My feet were planted to the ground, rooted in misery. All I could do was take whatever vitriol Monica wanted to throw at me.

But then Avi moved. He stood in front of me, completely blocking my view of them, and theirs of me.

In a low voice, he said, “You need to go. You will never speak to Laurel again. She may have wronged you in the past, but this is done. No more texting. No contact. Go.”

“She doesn’t deserve your defense. She’s a piece of shit on the ground.” And then she brushed by Avi, hissing as she passed. “You’re nothing.” Tom met my eyes briefly as he followed quickly behind her, but he never said a single word.

I stood there, staring at Avi’s back for a long time. Because he didn’t turn. He didn’t look at me. He’d gotten between us, defended me, but he couldn’t meet my eyes.

My feet finally started working, so I ran. I pushed out of the store and ran as fast as my legs would take me. I was panicked. I couldn’t move fast enough. Flashes went through my mind of Lucy working at the factory, the conveyor belt speeding up, throwing chocolate at her so quickly she had to stuff pieces in her mouth just to keep up. This was my Lucy moment. Only it wasn’t funny. Not at all.

I had to get the fuck out. There was no way I’d survive seeing Avi. He’d want to leave. I knew he would. So I’d leave first. I’d go, and then he could move out without seeing me.

I made it to my car and drove without thought. When I reached I-95 North, I knew where I was going. I needed my mom. I needed my family. They were the people who would love me, even though I’d fucked up badly. They’d still love me.

My phone buzzed in my purse, so I reached in and shut it down. I couldn’t bear to face whatever was waiting for me. I would have to. I knew that. But right then, my mouth and throat felt like they were so stuffed with conveyor belt chocolate, I could hardly breathe.

If I could just slow everything down. If someone would help me. Then maybe, just maybe, I could take a breath. Maybe it would be okay.