Chapter Four
CAM
Cam hounded Zak daily about meeting with the Dominion League. He wanted to get Thea partnered with him as soon as possible and avoid her being partnered with anyone else, someone less worthy. However, the Dominion League kept putting Zak off. They threw assignment after assignment at Cam, telling Zak they would meet soon. Cam ended up spending weeks in the human world, seeking out budding demon rings and higher-level demons on dark pursuits. Cam didn’t mind the assignments, but it meant he didn’t have time to find and speak to Thea. He considered sending a message through another angel but that was too risky if they needed to keep their relationship secret, and anyway, he wanted to look in her eyes and judge her reaction. He thought about her every day. Every moment, he wondered what she was doing, how she was getting on with her training. An agitation hung over him at the fact he wasn’t with her.
On the assignments, he fought brutally each time, aware he was growing more aggressive. He struggled against it, managing to hold off his rage, but it was always there.
Zak cautioned Cam regularly about his conduct, reminding him to take the emotion out of his fighting and make it clean, quick and painless. He even offered to spar with him in an effort to adjust his habits. Cam always refused. It was an insult to have to return to training with your Commander, and no matter how much Zak claimed that wasn’t the case—it obviously was.
After about six weeks in human time, a break came in his assignments. Zak said he was having a briefing with the Dominion League in a few days and to wait until after then to see if he got an answer about a meeting.
Cam visited the Stream, like he was supposed to do during some of his free time, even though he knew it was pointless. He wasn’t connecting to it, only keeping up appearances. So after he’d spent a little while in the garden, he abandoned it to focus on looking for Thea.
He couldn’t take it anymore. He told Zak he’d wait a full week but fuck it. Six days was long enough; he had to speak to her. There was too much between them that had gone unsaid, and the longer he went without speaking to her, the crazier it drove him.
It took him a while to find her. He searched all of the different training centers, asking questions and visiting their training halls. He eventually located her at a higher-level center that trained angels who already had significant training. It was impressive she had been placed in that level, but of course, he would expect nothing less of his little Nephilim.
He was not allowed to interrupt her training, so he waited on a bench outside the hall for a few hours for her session to finish.
Finally, he saw her and his heart soared. Her rich brown hair had been drawn up in a ponytail and her fitted clothes outlined that amazing body. She walked with another female angel and they talked and laughed as they headed away from training. Just the sight of Thea’s smile caused Cam’s heart to flip in his chest.
He stood slowly and she caught sight of him; her eyes locked on his and her lips parted. He wanted to kiss her right there, to gather her into his arms and hold her against him. One thing that stopped him was the look on Thea’s face. While pleasantly surprised, there was a reservation in her eyes. The closer he came, the more she fidgeted, unsure of his approach. He could only hope that she would be willing to hear what he had to say.
Cam slowed to a stop in front of her, holding her eye for a long moment. He drank in her beauty and basked in her presence. She blinked and opened and closed her mouth as if she didn’t know what to say.
“Elithea,” he said slowly, almost whispering, gazing at her face. “I need to talk to you. Would you come over here for a moment, please?”
Thea didn’t know what to do with herself. “I.. Maybe it’s not…”
“It will only take two minutes. I won’t keep you from your training.
Thea turned and spoke to the angel with her. Cam didn’t even try to listen to what she was saying. Her scent awakened something in him he had been missing so much and between the sight of her and her scent, he was slipping into mild euphoria. He held fast to his intentions; this was not the time to fuck up.
Thea turned back to him as the other angel wandered away. He led her over to the benches where he had been waiting.
They stood in front of the benches, Cam unable to tear his eyes away from her beautiful face. “Thea. Forgive me.”
She smiled, and Cam’s heart lifted. He had the urge to reach over and take her hand, to stroke her soft skin with his fingers. Just to touch her would be enough.
“That sounds like an order, Cam.”
“You know as well as I that anything I felt before is irrelevant to our relationship,” Cam said, jumping straight to the point.
Thea lowered her eyes. “I know.”
A moment of silence hung. “So why are you upset?” Cam asked, as softly as he could. “You know I love you.”
“I’m not upset, Cam. I’m just…”
Cam stepped closer to her, forcing her to look up at him. “What?”
She searched his eyes. “Disappointed… doubtful…”
Cam’s heart constricted. “About what?”
“About us.”
Cam tried not to let the panic rising in his throat show on his face.
“I know I shouldn’t let it affect me,” she said, quickly. “I know you love me. I just can’t help the way it feels to know you tried to get rid of me after our first fight.”
“It wasn’t a little argument, Thea. We practically broke up. I was hurt and angry. You cannot say you weren’t either.”
Thea nodded, her expression thoughtful. “But if they had removed you from my protection, that would’ve been permanent. You would have been removed from me permanently.”
The panic coiled in him. “I would have still seen you and made things right. I was planning to when I found you battling the Asmos demon.”
“You’re impulsive,” she said. “And that just makes me a little uncomfortable, that’s all.” She sighed. “I’ll be okay, I was just surprised by it and I wasn’t expecting to hear it. I’ll get over it.”
Cam’s heart sank. He had never thought about how it might look that he had tried to be switched from her protection. She would definitely struggle to trust him now. “My feelings for you are not casual, Thea.”
Thea sighed. “I don’t…” She squeezed her eyes closed and shook her head.
Every muscle in Cam’s body tensed. “Say it. Say whatever you need to say. ”
She looked up at him and smiled. “It’s fine, Cam.”
That gorgeous smile almost made Cam pull her to him in that instant, but he resisted. “What can I do?”
“I just need time, that’s all.”
Cam exhaled harshly. Time away from him? She’d had that. Surely she hadn’t enjoyed being separated from him? “Thea,” he said, reaching forward to touch her cheek. He pulled his hand away at the last minute, clenching it into a fist and lowering it back into his side. “How is your training going?”
Her expression lightened. “Good. My flight training is going slow, but I’ve just started learning about different energy formations.”
Cam frowned. “You’re not flying yet?”
Thea shook her head.
“Where are your quarters?”
Thea gestured to the flightway. “Half way down.”
“How do you get up here then?”
“Asteroth brings me up and—”
“What?” Anger surged through him. “He touches you?”
She looked at him surprised. “Well, he just carries me up—”
Cam growled, his fists clenching. “That is unacceptable. I will escort you from now on.”
Thea stared at him for a moment and then laughed. “Cam. Are you jealous?”
“You’re my mate,” he said, unable to prevent the snarl in his tone. “No one should touch you, except me.”
Thea pressed her lips together, trying not to laugh. “Cam, that’s very caveman of you.”
He stepped even closer to her and leaned in, until his mouth was inches from hers, and whispered, “I don’t give a fuck. That body, that pussy, those nipples are mine to lick and fuck and suck. I don’t want anyone else touching you. For any reason. Ever.” As he spoke his cock stiffened and his whole body responded to the level of proximity to her. He’d missed her so much, her scent and her touch, the way she moaned for him when he was inside of her and the way she sometimes took control, commanding what she wanted. It wasn’t just about the sex, but sex was such a big part of who they were, of how they were together, that it was impossible to separate his urges from his feelings for her.
She sobered, and her blue eyes softened with desire. Cam held onto his self-control and backed away. If he could, he would strip her right there. “When do you finish?”
“In four hours.”
Cam nodded. “I’ll be waiting.”
“Okay,” Thea smiled, turning away. “See you then, Cam.”
Cam watched her rejoin her friend, wondering what it would take for her to trust him again. He had once promised himself he would do whatever it took to win her trust and to keep trying for eternity. That was still true. Only now, he’d made things worse for himself.
He stood by the benches watching Thea until she disappeared into the common room, and then sat down to wait.