“Did you hear the news?” Giovanni says, mouth full of cereal. He takes a swig of orange juice before finishing swallowing. I grimace at him.

Dad drinks his coffee and holds the paper in front of his face. He’s reading the sports section like he always does in the morning and I know he’s barely even there. “No, what happened?”

Giovanni smiles. “There was a shooting at some strip club. They think it’s gang related,” he says. It’s almost like he’s happy that so much turmoil surrounds us. Perhaps if the violence grows, he can finally be a soldier in their stupid war.

“Interesting,” Dad mutters, not really listening. “What gangs?”

He shrugs. “Who knows,” he says. “But I heard they’re close to catching that guy. You know, whoever killed Michael Tucciano and Tony.”

My dad puts down the paper and takes off his glasses. “They’re connected?”

“That’s what Ricky thinks,” my brother says. I sip my coffee and watch him intently. “He’s saying we should gear up for war.”

My father drops his glasses and stands up from the table. “I won’t stay around to listen to this bullshit,” his face grows red with anger.

“We’re just defending our family,” Giovanni says, knowing full well he’s antagonizing everyone in the room right now. “If you don’t give a shit about the family, then I’ll understand you leaving.”

My dad, full of rage, pounds his fist on the table. Everything flies up. My coffee spills everywhere. I stand up and back away. “That is not what our family is about! I did not raise you to be an instigator,” he growls. “I raised you to have pride in yourself and to never fight, unless you absolutely have to.”

“We have to, dad!” my brother jumps up, eager to display his manhood. “This is self-defense. The bastard killed Tony. He killed Michael Tucciano. And he’ll kill us too if we don’t do something about!”

“Shut up!” I find myself screaming, almost instinctively. “Just shut up. Both of you. You both make me sick, you know that?” I run out of the house, unable to look either one in the eye.

How did I end up in such a family? Why did I ever come back? It’s like everyone from this damn city is trying to let me down. I call up Teresa right away. “Hey, Bianca!” she answers, shouting cheerfully into the receiver.

“Can you pick me up at my place?” I ask her. “I need someone to talk to. Like ASAP.”

When she responds, her voice has grown serious. “Sure. Of course I can. Is everything alright?”

“I’ll tell you in a second. Just come soon,” I say, out of breath.

She arrives in less than fifteen minutes and she takes me over to her house. “My parents are out, so we can just relax here. You look like a ghost, Bianca,” she says. “What’s going on?”

“It’s my brother,” I say. “He thinks he’s some warrior or something. I think he’s going to die. I think he’s going to end up killing himself.”

“Giovanni?” she asks, surprised. “He’s suicidal? Jesus. I never thought he would threaten something like that.”

I shake my head, still out of breath. “No, it’s not like that,” I say. “He’s itching to go to war. It’s Ricky too. They want to start another war or something. At least, that’s what it’s looking like.”

“Shit,” she sighs, looking down at her feet. I can tell something is on her mind, but she’s staying silent about whatever it is.

“Yeah, I don’t know what to do,” I tell her, rubbing my fingers against my temple. “It’s taking its toll on me, you know? Like, I was okay with coming back here, but now I’m not so sure this place is good for me. Every time I come back, things are crazier than before.”

“Yeah, well. You wouldn’t really know how things are. Would you?” she asks. “You’ve been gone for a long time now. The city is much safer now that Ricky is in charge of things.”

Fuck. Not her too. It’s like this whole neighborhood is brainwashed. “In what way?” I ask, trying to remain calm.

“I just mean, we’re protected now. At least that’s what my dad always says,” she shrugs. “He’s loving things now that he’s being taken seriously by Ricky.”

“Jesus, Teresa. Did he get a promotion or something? Did he make captain?” I ask her.

“Yeah, but I don’t see how that’s relevant,” she says with a straight face. “It’s not about that.”

“Sure it is!” I exclaim. “You’re all benefiting from the deaths of innocent people! No wonder you’re all complacent. Daddy can take you on a nice shopping spree and you sit here and think the world is all sugar and gumdrops. Well, I have news for you. People are dying and your father could be next.”

“Is that a threat or something?” she asks me.

“No,” I sigh. “No, of course not, Teresa. I’m just trying to get you to see outside the box a little. This is my brother. We grew up together. We experienced life together, for God’s sake. He’s my flesh and blood. I don’t want him to die. As much as he annoys me, deep down he’s a good guy.”

“I get it,” she nods. “But people grow up sometimes and they’re allowed to make their own decisions. It’s either he works for Ricky or some fucked up Automobile Corporation. If you ask me, he’s taking the safer route.”

“He’s worth more than a bullet to the head,” I say. “Look, let’s just drop it before we start to argue.”

“Fine,” she says. She puts both her hands on the table and taps her fingernails against the wood. After about a minute of silence, she scoots her chair out and exhales. “I know you’re seeing that guy,” she says.

“I’m not seeing anyone,” I say. It’s not exactly a lie. We broke it off a few days ago. “But you can think whatever you want. I don’t care anymore.”

“I think you should go,” she says, looking at the door. “And by the way, maybe if you weren’t fucking a known traitor, you could get your head out of your ass and realize just how much Ricky has your side in this.”

“Oh my God,” I say, completely shocked by her response. I thought we were friends. We had always gotten along so well in the past. I guess when people grow up, their fucked up politics start to take over. “Fuck this. Goodbye, Teresa.”

I walk out the door and I don’t look back. Only, she has to get the last word in. She runs to her porch yelling. “I’m telling Ricky you came by this morning!” Bitch.

“Go ahead,” I tell her, walking onto the sidewalk. I have a short route home, but I’m happy to walk it if that means getting away from everyone. “Like I give a shit anyway.”

It’s only four more days until I’m gone. Just four more days. I feel so God damn alone. I wish I had never told Hunter off. Then again, I wish we had never even met. Maybe then life would be a little simpler.