“Well, who is this on my phone?” I had to hold back laughter at the absurdly dramatic, confused voice I used once Jos’ face appeared on screen.

“Bitch, don’t act like you don’t know, you called me!”

I dissolved into giggles at her indignant tone. “I just miss your pretty face. You’ve been MIA. I don’t like it, especially when I can’t just drop in on you to make sure you’re still alive.”

“Ugh, I know, I know. I’m sorry, babe. It’s been crazy at the studio. Tracey quit and Melina’s on maternity leave, which means I’m running their classes along with all the office work. I need a vacation.”

I looked at the screen intently, and while she was as beautiful as ever, dark circles under her eyes were barely masked with makeup and her shoulders drooped in exhaustion.

“I have a solution!” I exclaimed, knowing she would never take me up on my offer.

“I can’t come take a vacation. You know I would be on the first plane out there.” She took a sip of what I guessed was green tea before turning her tired smile on me. “You look happy, Ros. Has Dan been home more?”

I couldn’t help the frown that took over my face at her question. It hit me then that I couldn’t talk about Archer with her, not yet, at least. Not until I found a way to explain his presence that didn’t sound like I had gone off the deep end out here. Keeping this from her was going to be like walking on eggshells. We almost never kept secrets from each other, we knew each other too well. “No, he hasn’t. He hasn’t called much, either. He’s so caught up with this project.”

“Hmmm. You look much more content than you did during our last conversation. What’s going on over there?”

“Nothing much, really. I’ve just been exploring, getting used to the place and spending time with Marie and some of her friends. I love it here, Jos. I don’t know why this place feels like home, but it does.”

That made me think back to my conversation with Archer a few nights ago. That feeling of rightness that came over me when I got here was so similar to what he described, it shook me a little. We both belong here. The thought flitted through my mind before I could stop it.

“What’s that look for, Ros?”

Dammit.

Maybe a FaceTime call had been a bad idea. I sat for a minute considering how I could spin this to satisfy the curiosity I had piqued in my best friend. “I was just thinking about a realization I had the other day. About my career, or lack thereof.”

“Oh, have you found inspiration yet? Are you creating pieces again?”

The change of subject perked her up. Jos was always encouraging me to just start working at my own stuff again, convinced that I would find my way once I lost myself in the creative process. I still wasn’t sure.

“No, not yet. And that’s the problem. I’ve been thinking that maybe I’m being my own worst enemy about this whole thing.”

“I can see that. How do you think this happened?”

I’d been thinking about this for a while, trying to find answers, so my response came easier than I expected. “I got so stuck in my routine I stopped looking for the magic of everyday life. All those little things that used to inspire me in college? I think I stopped seeing them because I stopped looking for them.”

Could it really be that simple? The words Archer and I had exchanged were on a loop in my mind, playing over and over again. Could it really be as easy as opening my eyes?

“Now that you know your truth, what are you going to do to change it?”

That one question kept screaming at me. The realization that I had all the control in this situation was a revelation.

“So, are you going to start seeing the magic again?” Jos asked, breaking through my thoughts.

“Yeah, I think I am.” I straightened up my spine and looked her dead on through the lens of my phone’s camera. “I’ve been letting life just happen to me for far too long. I think this is one area I can take back control. I have to take control of at least this.”

A huge, breathtaking smile broke out over Jos’ face. “That’s my girl,” she said. Heat rose in my cheeks and I couldn’t help the blush her words, her love had brought out. “So, I hate to change the subject—”

I interrupted her with a groan. I knew I wasn’t going to like the next words out of her mouth. “Is there anything I can do to keep you from finishing that? I see that look on your face, Jos, I have a feeling I’m not going to like whatever it is you have to say.” I lay back and got ready for whatever it was she wanted to talk about.

“Nope, not a chance. Anyway, have you talked to your dad lately?” She almost sounded timid. Almost. The question hit me like a punch in my gut and I sat up quickly, making my head swim with dizziness in the process.

“No, I haven’t talked to him since… damn, since the going-away party, I guess. Why?”

I thought back to the party.

The minute my eyes met a familiar pair of hazel eyes that were almost a mirror of my own, I openly sobbed, pulling away from Dan and running to throw my arms around my father.

“Oh, Daddy, I’ve missed you so much.”

I pulled away slightly, trying to wipe away the tears now coursing down my face.

“I wouldn’t have missed this for anything, baby girl.”

His deep voice with just a hint of a Southern twang left over from his youth washed over me, soothing something in my heart I hadn’t known needed soothing. While he didn’t live far away, the nine-hour drive to Tahoe City always seemed like oceans away, and we didn’t get to see each other as much as I would have liked.

The fact that he was missing the birth of his stepson, Marco’s, first child made my heart ache in an unfamiliar way. His response when I asked him why he would miss the arrival of his first grandchild? “When is the last time I got to see you?” He was right, it had been far too long, and I couldn’t deny how grateful I was to see him, even if I couldn’t bring myself to say the words.

“I saw him the other day. He was in town with Maria, Marco, and his family. He asked how you were. Ros, he looked so sad. I know you guys suck at communication, I do. But he’s not going to be around forever either.”

She let her words trail off, but I knew what she was thinking. What she was always urging me to do gently, in her way: Fix this. Fix things with your father.

And I wanted to, I really did, but I didn’t have the first clue how to go about doing it. We didn’t suck at communication, we just didn’t do it at all. It had always been that way, and as I considered that it became apparent that my issues with Dan stemmed from somewhere.

“Joooosss. I don’t even know what to say to him. How do I fix this with one phone call, with a single conversation? How do I repair a lifetime of dysfunction?” I finally gave voice to the question on constant repeat in my head. In all these years, I’d yet to find an answer.

Jos looked at me like the answer was so obvious that she was disappointed I hadn’t figured it out for myself already. “You don’t, Rosalind. You don’t fix it all with one conversation. You take that first step. And then you take another. Most changes in life don’t happen overnight. They are little things you do every day until you wake up and realize your life has changed in a significant way. That’s how life works. Little by little, piece by piece until you’ve created the world you want.”

Long after our call ended, I thought about what she said, replaying her words over and over again. While so simple, it was a revelation to me. How could I have been so blind as to never figure this out on my own? The longer I thought about it, the more I wondered why she had never said this to me before.

A few days later it finally hit me. Until that day, I hadn’t been ready to really hear the truth behind her words. Once I had, I knew I had to find a way to make them my truth.