Chapter Eighteen
The next time, she awoke she felt a warm hand touching her. Opening her eyes, she saw Reno sitting upright in a chair beside her, his eyes glazed, his breathing slightly erratic. Shock. But a good shock, after all.
“You are not allowed to say I told you so,” he said when he noticed she was awake.
“I told you so.” She tried for a faint grin. “You can’t hit me when I’m sick.”
He bowed his head, rubbing his temples with the tips of his fingers. “I can’t believe this. All these months, I’ve been so miserable to her, shutting her out, withholding love. What a bastard I am. I don’t deserve her. Or you. Either of you.”
“Stop that.” Sarah summoned what strength she had. “You had no way of knowing the test was flawed. You could only go on the information that was given to you.”
“You don’t know how terrified I’ve been, watching them take care of her.” He wiped his hand over his face as if brushing cobwebs away. “I looked at her lying there, so panicked at the sight of her still, little form, and realized, in the end, it didn’t matter what any of these tests show. You’ve been right all along. Biology has little to do with it.”
Sarah blinked her eyes against the tears crowding her lids. “You’ve always loved her. I sensed it, but you were just in too much pain to show it.”
“Selfish pain, Sarah.” He gently squeezed her hand, holding it as afraid to break the contact. “I took out my own damaged ego on a child who was the innocent bystander in this little melodrama. She’s my daughter—our daughter—and just the way it happened with you, it took a near disaster to show me what a damn fool I’ve been.” He leaned back in the chair, eyes closed, lines of anguish scoring his face. “God, what if something goes wrong, and I never get to tell her how much I love her?”
“She’ll be fine,” Sarah reassured him. “You heard the doctor. You got her here in plenty of time. She’s got a full medical team taking care of her. Please stop beating yourself up. Children survive worse things.”
“I love her, Sarah.” His eyes were bright with unshed tears, and the hand holding hers shook. “I love both of you. I’m going to spend the rest of my life showing you just how much.”
She’d waited so long to hear those words she almost couldn’t take them in.
“Loving us is all we ever asked of you, you know.” Her voice was soft, and she squeezed the hand holding hers with what strength she had.
He reached into his pocket and drew out a small box.
“I, uh, ran out for a bit while you were still knocked out. I wanted to give you something that would make up for being such a dickhead all these months.”
“You didn’t need to get me anything,” she protested.
“Yes, I did. For the mother of my child.”
His child. Pleasure flooded through her and warmed her at his words. She watched, holding her breath as he opened the box.
He leaned over to give her a kiss filled with both desire and promise. Then he handed the box to her. “This is my heart,” he said solemnly. “I give it to you willingly with all my love.”
Sarah gasped when she opened the jeweler’s box. Inside were tiny gold earrings in the shape of hearts, outlined in pearls and diamonds. Tears welled in her eyes as she lifted them out.
“I will always keep your heart safe,” she said, her voice husky. She closed her fingers around the box and pressed it to her chest.
“I love you,” he said again. “I plan to say it so much you’ll get sick of hearing it.”
“Never.” She shook her head.
“What agony that woman put us all through.”
Even in her weakened condition, Sarah found the strength to silently curse Maggie. She heard the traces of residual anger in his voice. She’d work on getting him past that.
“She wanted to strike back at you, hurt you the only way she knew how. She saw how much you loved Molly and knew that was where she could strike at you to cause the most pain.”
“How can I ever make it up to Molly?” He visibly fought the tears now, his throat muscle working reflexively.
“Children know things, Reno. They sense things. It will be fine. I promise you.”
Sarah wanted to say something else, but she couldn’t make herself think straight any more. The nausea was coming in waves, swamping her and receding. She wished someone would come back with her test results so they could give her something to keep it at bay.
Reno, fidgeting in the chair, glanced through the curtain toward the door. “Can I leave you for a minute, sweetheart? Are you okay here? I’m sorry. I just have to know how she’s doing.”
“She’s doing fine.” Dr. Moreland came through the curtain before Reno could move. “She’s out of surgery and doing very nicely.” He made some notes on one of the charts he held. “She had no adverse reaction to the anesthetic, but she’s got quite a lot of stitches in that arm. I’d prefer to keep her for a couple of nights, just to monitor her and give her some IV antibiotics.”
“Of course,” Reno said, standing up. “Whatever’s best. Can we see her?”
“As soon as they get her set up. Right now, she’s in pediatric recovery, and I need to discuss with you where we’re going to put her.”
“I don’t understand.” Reno was instantly alert, ready to take command. “Is there some problem?”
“No. There are just a few other things we need to address.” He made one last note on the second chart, then flipped it closed.
“What things? And what about my wife? What have you found out about her? Can’t you do something for her?” His voice rose as the worry he’d been battling surged to the forefront. “She’s had this virus or whatever you want to call it for five days now and doesn’t seem to be getting much better.”
The doctor nodded and opened the chart again. “Mrs. Sullivan, have you ever been told you have a major hormonal imbalance?”
“Yes, I know about that. I had a miscarriage several years ago, and my hormones haven’t been right since then. I used to take a low dose of birth control to try and straighten it out, but the pills made me sick. Why?”
“I’m sure that’s the reason you’re having such severe nausea. You don’t have the flu, my dear. You’re pregnant.”
Sarah and Reno stared at him as if he’d grown an extra head.
“Pregnant?” Sarah managed to croak. She had a sudden urge to laugh hysterically.
“Yes, your lab tests confirm it. About two months, I’d say. I always run the test before we medicate, just in case. Don’t want any problems, you know. But the hormone imbalance has exacerbated what we usually call morning sickness and also made you drowsier than normal. So.” He closed the chart and smiled at them. “I’m assuming this is good news.”
Sarah was the first to find her voice. “Yes, doctor, thank you.” She clung to Reno’s hand with a fierce grip. “It’s very good news.”
“You’ll need to see your own obstetrician as soon as possible. With your condition and history, you should be monitored carefully. Meanwhile, I’m going to keep you for a couple of nights, too. You’re severely dehydrated from all the vomiting, and your blood pressure’s a little low. We discussed it and thought you might want your daughter set up in the room with you.”
Reno swallowed several times before he finally managed to speak, although his voice was barely recognizable. “Yes, we’d appreciate that very much. Thank you.”
“All right, then. The nurse will give you something for that nausea now, Mrs. Sullivan, and set up an IV. Then they’ll come and get you as soon as the room is ready.” He shook hands with Reno and left the room.
Reno lowered himself back into the chair beside the bed, still clutching Sarah’s hand, still unbelieving. The tears he’d been trying to hold back were now rolling down his face, and his throat was so tight he couldn’t say anything. The look on his face made Sarah’s heart ache.
“A baby.” He was having trouble taking everything in. First the news about Molly. Now this. “I don’t deserve all this good fortune.” His voice was thick with emotion.
“I think everything was meant to happen the way it did.” Sarah managed to summon a smile. “We are truly blessed.”
He raised his head, and they looked at each other, stunned by it all.
They were still trying to absorb it all when the nurse came in carrying a tray with several items on it.
“These shots should make you feel better real quick. And I’m going to start an IV drip, so we can get some fluids into your body. That will help a lot, too.”
Reno moved out of the way until the nurse was finished, then he was back at Sarah’s side in an instant. He laid his hand over her lower abdomen.
“That night right before our anniversary.” His voice was quiet, loving. “I knew there was something different when we made love. I swear that’s when it happened.”
“I think so, too. My periods have never been regular since the miscarriage so I didn’t suspect anything unusual. I just thought this was the flu,” Sarah told him. “Everything happens for a purpose, you know. We can put the past behind us now, once and for all. Life is good.” She grinned weakly. “And I’m even starting to feel a little better.”
“I love you so much, Sarah.”
He leaned over to kiss her, wanting to hold her but afraid of dislodging something.
“Mr. Sullivan?” The nurse was at the curtain again. “Your daughter’s doing fine. It will be just a few minutes now, and we’ll get both her and your wife upstairs. There’s a young lady out here in great distress, though, who wants to see you. Is it all right to bring her back here?”
“It must be Nicki,” Reno said. “Yes, please. Go and get her.”
It was a tear-stained and shaken Nicki, who appeared, with her mother behind her.
“I told her everything would be all right, but she’s been a wreck,” Mrs. Vanetta said.
Reno went to her and took her hands in his. “Nicki, if it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I was right there and wasn’t paying attention.”
Sarah wished she could hug the unhappy, scared teenager. “Molly’s fine,” she told her. “Accidents happen. Please don’t keep blaming yourself. You take such good care of her. We trust you, honestly. And she’s doing fine. They’ve already finished stitching her up. They’ll keep her a couple of nights as a precaution, but I promise you she’s okay.”
Nicki burst into tears again. Reno looked at Sarah helplessly, then put his arm around Nicki and moved her over closer to his wife.
“You’d better pull yourself together because we’re really going to need you now,” Sarah smiled, reaching for Nicki’s hand. “We’re going to have a baby.”
Nicki looked up through her tears. “Honest? A baby?”
“Yes and we need your help before it comes and afterward. You’d better get in shape for this.”
“She was so worried you wouldn’t want her to sit anymore,” Mrs. Vanetta said. “I told her it’s all right. She should know about accidents. She and her brothers and sisters kept the emergency room in business when they were younger.”
When the orderly came to get Sarah, Reno sent Nicki and her mother home. He walked along beside his wife, still clutching her hand, as they rolled her toward the elevator.
In minutes, Sarah was settled in the hospital room, her IV checked and her vitals taken once more. When the nurse had finished with her, they rolled in a hospital crib with Molly in it. She looked so white and still that both Sarah and Reno panicked.
“She’s fine,” the nurse assured them. “She woke up from the anesthetic with no problem. She’s sleeping normally now. We’ll be checking on both of you throughout the night. Doctor wants regular reports. I’ll be back after a while.”
Reno stood at the crib, motionless, his eyes fixed on Molly. She looked so small, so fragile. Her dark curls were tousled around her pale face. Her left arm was bandaged from wrist to shoulder and an IV needle was taped to her right hand.
Why hadn’t he looked at her more closely before? All he’d seen were Maggie’s blonde curls and her rounded cheeks. But Molly had his thick eyelashes and his dark, gold-flecked eyes. He’d been so blinded by anger and rage he’d seen nothing except his love for this child ripped from his heart by hateful words.
His eyes moved to Sarah, drowsy from the medication, her eyes closing as she drifted off. What an incredible woman she was. He’d hired her as if employing a servant, and she’d stepped in where others would have fled. She was a loving mother to the daughter he’d refused to acknowledge, and she’d given her heart to him willingly, despite how little of himself he’d given back to her. When he’d turned to her for love, she had accepted him without reservation.
He thought agonizingly of all the time that had been wasted, time when he and Sarah could have had a real relationship. Time he could have spent as Molly’s father. He was more fortunate than any man had a right to be. He would spend the rest of his life making it up to both of them and to the new little life that he and Sarah had created.
He watched them until he was sure they were both sleeping, then tiptoed from the room to find a place to use his cell phone. He needed to call Nick and Lindsey as well as Sarah’s parents. He was sure the Madisons, in particular, had called the house and been worried when no one answered.
Ellen Madison burst into happy tears at the news, then handed the phone to her husband who had a hard time controlling his own emotions. Nick and Lindsey could barely contain their excitement. Reno told everyone, when they asked, that they could check on his family in the morning. His family! What a nice ring that had to it.
Both Sarah and Molly were still sleeping when he returned to the room. Torn between finding a place next to his daughter or his wife, he finally solved his problem by moving the crib even closer to Sarah’s bed. Situating himself in the chair, he reached out one hand to touch Molly and placed the other on Sarah’s arm. He sat for a long time, his heart so full he thought it would burst.
At last, the specter of Maggie had been chased away.
****
When Sarah opened her eyes, light was pouring in through the window, the sun casting shadows against the wall. She turned her head and smiled at what she saw. Reno was slumped in the chair between the bed and the crib, rumpled and unshaven. One hand rested on her arm and one of his large fingers was clasped tightly in Molly’s tiny ones. The little girl was still sleeping, but Sarah could see her breathing was even and regular and her color much better.
She shifted a little, and Reno came awake at once.
“Are you all right?” He lifted his hand from her arm and rubbed his eyes. “How do you feel?”
“Better, I think. How’s Molly?”
“Pretty good. She woke once during the night. I think her arm was bothering her, so they gave her some baby aspirin. That’s why she’s still sleeping now.”
“Not anymore. Take a look.”
Molly had her eyes wide open and was trying to sit up. Reno bent over the crib and lifted her gently.
“They showed me how to hold her,” he explained. “The bandage on her arm is so big because they want to protect all the stitches. But they took out the IV early this morning, so she can move around better now. They took yours out, too. They said you were pretty well re-hydrated, and you could now take medication by mouth. They want another twenty-four hours, though, to see if you can keep food down.”
Reno settled Molly on his lap, taking care with her arm and showered her face with soft kisses. He couldn’t take his eyes away from her. He touched her hair, her cheeks, her tiny mouth, kissing her over and over again.
Molly, reveling in the attention, giggled and reached up to pat him with her good hand.
Sarah felt tears gathering in her eyes and blinked them away.
“I called Lindsey and Nick and your folks,” Reno informed Sarah. “And Tony. I figured Nicki’s mother would have passed the word on the Vanetta grapevine. And I didn’t want your folks to worry when we weren’t home, knowing you’d been sick.”
“Did you tell them we’re fine now?”
“Yes. They said they’d probably come by later today. I expect to see my partner and his wife this morning, though, and maybe even Tony.”
A nurse’s aide bustled in, carrying a tray that she put on the bed table. “Breakfast for the ladies,” she called out. “Mrs. Sullivan, your orders say you should try some weak tea and dry toast. How’s the nausea this morning?”
“Much better,” Sarah told her. “And I don’t feel quite so dizzy.” She didn’t. The room had settled around her, everything staying in one place even when she moved.
“Good.” This from the nurse entering the room. “Here’s your morning meds and baby aspirin for your daughter. She’ll need this for a few days until the worst of the soreness is gone. Doctor will send you home with some medication for the nausea, Mrs. Sullivan, but he wants you to see your obstetrician as soon as possible.”
“We’ll take care of it right away,” Reno stated, his voice firm.
“I’ll let you get started on your breakfast.” The nurse smiled at Molly. “I’d say you need a highchair to feed this little angel. I’ll send one in right away.”
Reno shook his head. “I’ll hold her on my lap and feed her.”
****
The doctor had put a rush on the preliminary DNA test the night before, and the day seemed to drag by while they waited for the results.
“I’m convinced it’s positive,” Reno said at one point. “Not a doubt at this point.”
“Even if it’s not,” Sarah pointed out, “it won’t make a difference.”
“It will be positive.” Reno’s voice was firm and confident. “I just know it.”
He helped Sarah eat and fed Molly. Then, while Sarah dozed, he held the child on his lap, crooning to her, until she, too, fell asleep. He knew he should put her back in the crib, but he couldn’t get enough of holding her.
The nurse arrived with the evening medication, and the doctor walked in right on her heels.
“First things first,” he said. “I have the results back on the preliminary DNA test.” He grinned. “Good thing you said cost didn’t matter because I think they charged through the nose to rush it. However, there’s no doubt you’re Molly’s father, Mr. Sullivan. I hope that pleases you.”
Reno could only nod, so gripped by emotion he couldn’t speak.
“Well, everyone seems fine here. I’ll just check my patients over, but I think both can go home tomorrow.”
Finished with his exam of mother and child, he made notes on the chart, then told them he was writing discharge orders for the next day. He wanted the two of them there one more night, but they could all go home in the morning.
Reno collapsed back in the chair, still amazed by the turn their life had taken.
Sarah, feeling immeasurably better, grinned at him. “Life sure is good, isn’t it, Daddy?”
“Better than I deserve.” He leaned over and kissed his wife firmly on the lips, then picked up Molly and sat back in the chair. Nestling the little girl against his chest, he reached for Sarah’s hand and twined his fingers through hers.
And that’s how they were, Reno feeding Molly and Sarah sipping at her tea when Nick and Lindsey appeared in the doorway. Sarah looked up and waved them in.
Lindsey came over to the side of the bed and hugged her. “Reno called last night.”
“I figured he would. We’re fine. Honestly.”
“He told us the good news, too. Oh, Sarah, we’re so very happy for you. For both of you. It’s a shame it took this kind of an emergency to turn things around, but I knew everything would work out sooner or later.”
“The best news is we had another DNA test done, and it proves without a doubt that Reno is Molly’s father.” Sarah beamed.
“Oh, my god,” Lindsey gasped. “That is just too much.” She kissed her friends soundly while Nick shook Reno’s free hand. Emotion was very thick in the room.
Sarah turned her head and looked at Reno, cuddling his daughter. Then she looked at Nick, with his arm around Lindsey, glowing with her pregnancy. Two of the best friends in the world.
Her marriage to Reno might have begun as a bargain, but it had certainly turned out to be a good one for both of them. Sarah touched her abdomen where the baby was growing, the child she and Reno had conceived with their love.
A new home, a new child, and a new life.