Twenty-Six

Winnie

I hide out at the playground like Trey told me to until it’s dark enough that nobody can tell who I am. Trey still hasn’t called, and when I checked to see if my phone was still working, there was no dial tone. Jasper must have forgotten to pay the bill, or he cut me off. I’m guessing he figured it wasn’t getting him anything out of our friendship anymore, so he should save his pennies. I mean, he told the whole school I was a slut. I think that was about as big of a fuck-you as he could have given me. But he knows the phone is my lifeline, and that’s why it might sting a little more than the rumors he spread.

Trey will freak out if he gets to the playground, and I’m not there, but I walk toward The Whip anyway. Not wanting to be seen wasn’t the only reason I waited until it was dark outside. I knew that, if I saw the bloodstain, I’d be paralyzed with fear again, and I’d never make it inside. I couldn’t risk it, so I waited. I’m thankful I did because I’m no longer in control of my body, and my eyes zone in on the exact spot where I passed out. I can’t see any marks, and I keep walking.

Ace must see me approaching on the camera because the intercom says, “Come in,” before I press the button.

I haven’t been inside since my last shift, and I prepare myself for the same looks I got when I went back to school.

But that’s the difference between high school and the rest of the world; nobody here cares. The few people I pass probably have problems bigger than mine.

Ace meets me at the door to his office and points to the chair in front of his desk. “Take a seat,” he says. “What’s up?”

“I need a job,” I tell him.

I figured, if I cut right to the chase, he’d take me seriously. If I can show him that I’m not the fragile little girl who fell apart and landed in the hospital, then maybe he’ll give me a chance. I know I’m as much of a risk to him as I am to Trey, but business is business, and I can make him a lot of money, just like we had planned to before the shooting happened.

“What’s with the bag?” he asks.

“I need a place to stay. Just for a little while until I have enough to afford something of my own.”

He pulls his phone out and scrolls through whatever he’s looking at with his thumb. I sit up a little straighter because I know what’s coming.

“Do you want me to call my brother? He’s off tonight, said he wasn’t feeling well, but if I tell him you’re here, he’ll come in.”

“No,” I say in a rush.

Jasper’s the last person I want to see, and if he tells Ace about what I do in the trailer or anything about Trey, I’ll lose any chance I have at working here.

“I’m sure he’s not really sick, Winnie. Just wanted a night off because he’s still a punk with no responsibilities. God, I miss being young.”

“Please, don’t tell him I’m here.”

He sets his phone down and then rests his elbows on the desk. “You and my brother were attached at the hip. Now, he gets weird when I mention your name, and you don’t want to see him. What happened?”

“It’s a long story.”

“I have time.”

I don’t. “Look, Ace, if you don’t have anything for me, then I have to go find someone who does.”

He stares at me and searches my eyes so intently, I almost change my mind and run for the door. But running is what got me in this position, and I can’t keep doing it. Nobody’s ever going to chase me, so if I want to prove to Trey that I can get a job and make enough money to put a roof over my head, then I have to stay.

Even if all I can afford is another shitty trailer in the park, at least it’ll be mine. I’ve worked enough babysitting jobs for the clerk in the housing office here in the park that I think I can get her to falsify some paperwork and put the trailer in my name. At least then nobody can trace it back to Trey and get him in trouble. But all that depends on Ace saying yes. Without a job at The Whip, I can’t afford anything.

“Please,” I whisper. “Take a chance, just this once.”

“I take chances every day, Winnie. And, after what happened to you here, I can’t imagine why you’d ever want to step foot back in this place. So, tell me, what’s changed? How are you sitting here, breathing, when you almost died in the parking lot?”

I shrug like it’s no big deal because, if he gets a glimpse at the fear I carry around with me, I’ll be ushered right back to the parking lot that almost took me out. The fact that I’m not having a full-blown panic attack should be enough, but Ace needs more.

“I’m on my own now.”

“What happened with the home? Jasper said you were in a good place across town with some other kids your age.”

“I was. But it didn’t work out.” I should tell him how his brother ruined everything for me, but I’m afraid that, if I talk badly about Jasper, I’ll lose my only shot at freedom.

Even if Ace has nothing for me, I can hide out in the restroom until they close up for the night. Nobody will ever know I’m here. I’ll have a kitchen full of food, restrooms, and a shower. It’d be like staying in a hotel, only without the expensive bill.

“You’re not old enough to do much besides the job you had before. I can let you bus some tables and run food after things die down a little. I imagine your social worker is looking for you.”

I nod, scared that being on the run is a game changer for Ace. It’s not like I’m actually running. I’m still in Carillon. I’m just doing things my way and staying where I want to stay. As long as I’m safe, Cindy and the social workers shouldn’t care.

“I promise it’ll be like I’m not even here. No trouble.”

“What about Jasper? You’ll be working alongside him again. Won’t that be weird for you?”

My mouth’s so dry, it’s hard to swallow. I’ve never put myself out there like this, and what I’m about to say shocks me just as much as it’s about to shock Ace. But I have no choice. I can’t work with Jasper and pretend like he didn’t hurt me. For all I know, working with him could make my life worse. I can only be so invisible, and that’s why I need to do something else. I need to stay away from the kitchen.

“I want to dance, Ace.”

“What?” he spits. He wasn’t expecting me to ever go there.

Rock bottom is a funny place though, and you do what you have to do to dig your way back out.

“You passed out all those flyers with my face on them. People from three towns over were coming to your bar to see me. If the shooting hadn’t happened, I would have been on your stage, making you a whole lot of money. I can still do that.”

“Tess was the reason for that, Winnie. She’s not here anymore, and you owe her nothing.”

“I’m not doing this for Tess. This time, it’s for me.” And the more cash I bring in for Ace, the more I’ll pocket. A couple of times onstage, and I’ll be able to afford a trailer and all the bills that go along with it. I’ll be set.

Ace stands up and peers through the blinds like he’s already worried his door’s about to get busted down by the cops. I’ve never seen him so nervous.

“Is this some kind of setup?”

“No, Ace. This is me asking a friend for a favor.”

“It’s too dangerous, Winnie. You’ll get noticed onstage. At least, if you stay in the kitchen, there’s a better chance that nobody will find you. The stage puts a huge target on your back with the cops and with the other girls.”

I’m not worried about the other girls. Most of them are nicer than Tess ever was, and if I stay out of their way, they won’t notice me. All they want is their time onstage to make enough to feed their habits and their children. At least with me, I’m not old enough to take their men and do any extra favors. I can bring them in, and they can reap the rewards.

“Ace, most of the dancers wear wigs. They cover their faces in so much makeup, they end up being completely different versions of themselves. I can become someone else for a little while, too.”

His movements become less agitated, and he might even be growing a little patience. He liked the idea a couple of weeks ago. His mind couldn’t have changed that fast.

“How do you plan on getting by Jasper? Because, if he sees you onstage, he’ll pull you off himself. And then he’ll try to kick my ass for allowing it.”

“He won’t care anymore. Things are different.”

Ace sits back in his chair and laughs. He’s not laughing at me, but he’s not laughing with me either. “I’m starting to think you need your eyes checked. My brother is so fucking in love with you, it’s sickening. His world revolves around you, Winnie. I don’t know how you can’t see that.”

If smashing windows and spreading vicious rumors around school is how Jasper shows his love, then he has a twisted heart.

“Let me worry about Jasper. I can make this happen whether he agrees with it or not. It’s not his call. It’s yours and mine.”

I can almost see the wheels turning inside Ace’s head. He knows it’s wrong to let a minor on the stage, especially one dodging the cops, but money’s always been his sole motivator. He can’t deny the dollar signs and the cash flow I’d bring in. Someone new. Someone nobody’s seen before. Someone so unexpected, word would spread like wildfire, maybe even more than it did the last time I was supposed to dance.

Does that make me feel cheap?

Yes.

Do I hate myself for making this decision?

Of course.

But does it get me closer to a life with Trey?

Hopefully.

If I play my cards right, I can solve our problems. Trey’s felt helpless, like his hands are tied because of the law, so if I can give him me without any of the risks, I’ll suffer through three weeks of dancing until my pockets are full and we can escape.

Trey just can’t find out. And I haven’t figured out how I’ll make that happen, but there’s gotta be a way.

“Do we have a deal, Ace?” My voice radiates confidence, but my knees are shaking beneath the desk. If I were to stand up right now, I’d fall into a heap on the floor.

“We have a deal,” he says with less hesitation. “Don’t make me regret it.”

“I’ve got this.”

He rubs his hands over his face and then pushes his chair away from the desk. “You can stay at my place tonight. We’ll work with one of the girls to get you set up with everything you need. If you’re ready, you can dance tomorrow night.”

“I’ll be ready,” I tell him.

I have to be. The rest of my life is on the line.