It’s been three days since I’ve heard from Avery and I’m ready to lose my mind. I’ve been trying to give her space, but I’m done with that. Grabbing my phone from my back pocket, I send her a quick text.
Me: Hey, are you busy Saturday night?
I wait for her to reply. I’m staring at the screen, willing her to reach out to me. Just as I’m about to slide my phone back in my pocket, she replies.
Avery: We agreed to go slow, Dylan.
Me: I miss you.
Avery: I just need some time.
Me: I’ll be on my best behavior. I just want to see you. Saturday night?
Avery: What did you have in mind?
Me: Dinner and a movie?
Avery: Where should I meet you?
Me: I’ll pick you up. I get more time with you that way.
I know I’m pushing my luck, but that’s how we used to do it. It’s my job to remind her of that, of what we were, and show her what we can be.
Avery: I can drive, Dylan. What time should I meet you?
Me: How am I going to woo you if you won’t let me pick you up?
Avery: Fine. Seven?
Me: I’ll see you then.
I can hardly focus the rest of the day as I plan our date. The rest of the week drags on. I did an oil change on a car that was here for new brakes and put water in a radiator instead of coolant. All things that can be fixed, and one customer got a free oil change. Dad finally told me to go home.
I spent all day yesterday making sure I have everything I need for the date tonight. I picked up the movie, I know where we’re eating, and I have flowers. I washed our blanket, the one we always used either in my truck or up on the roof. I have it all planned out; now I just need to execute it.
At ten till seven, I pull into her driveway. I grab the flowers sitting in the passenger seat and climb out of the truck. Before I can get to the door, she’s there, standing before me.
“Avery,” I greet her.
“Hi.” She raises her hand in a wave. Cute as hell, this one.
“These are for you.” I hand her the flowers.
She brings them to her nose and sniffs. “Thank you, Dylan. Let me put them in some water and we can go. Am I dressed okay?”
“You’re prefect.”
She gives me a look that tells me she thinks I’m laying it on too thick and heads into the house. When she emerges, I hold my arm out for her just like I did at the wedding. She rolls her eyes but takes my arm and allows me to lead her to my truck. I open the door for her and wait for her to buckle up before closing it.
“Where are we going?”
“Well, I kind of like our version of dinner and a movie, so I thought we would do us.”
“Do us?” she asks.
“Yeah, you know, on the roof of the shop. That was our first date.”
“I remember. Dylan, I don’t think that’s such a great idea.”
“That’s our spot, Aves. I was just—”
“It’s our spot all right,” she laughs humorlessly. “That’s where you ended us, Dylan.”
Fuck. “I know that, but it’s also where we had our first date. I just thought… we have a lot of good memories up on that roof.”
“The bad sometimes outweigh the good,” she says softly.
“One day, the one I will regret for the rest of my life. I didn’t know that living without you would be as hard as it was. Can we just… remember the good times we had here?” I reach out as if to take her hand but think better of it, placing it back on the steering wheel, gripping it tightly. “Just try, Aves. If you don’t want to stay, if it’s too painful, we can leave. Just try.” My voice is pleading.
“Fine,” she grumbles.
I sigh with relief. I almost told her we could change plans, but I really don’t want to. I want her to remember us together, the love we shared. I pull into the back of the shop and ask her to wait for me to get her door. Of course, she doesn’t. My hand on her back, I lead her into the shop, locking the door behind me.
“You know the way,” I say, holding my arm out and stepping to the side so she can pass me to go up the steps. Cautiously she opens the door that leads to the roof. I know what she’s seeing. I made sure everything was as close to the same as I could. The TV is now a flat-screen and it’s a little bigger, but the couch, the pizza, the movie, the blanket, everything else is exactly as it was the first night I brought her here.
“You’ve been busy,” she says, walking toward the couch.
“Hungry?” I ask, avoiding her comment.
“Sure.” She takes a seat on the couch, kicking off her flip-flops. “What movie are we watching?”
“Hunger Games,” I answer, not looking at her. I make us both a plate and then take my seat beside her. Grabbing the remote, I hit Play and we settle into the couch, eating our pizza.
“You want more?” I ask once she finishes hers.
“No, I’m stuffed.”
I take her plate and mine and set them on the table. Reaching behind us, I grab the blanket and cover her legs with it. She just smiles and goes back to the movie. Not ten minutes later, I feel her hand wrap around mine. I don’t look at her, just open my palm and allow her to lace her fingers with mine. That’s how we finish the movie—hand in hand, sitting side by side.
“Thank you for tonight.” She pulls her hand from mine and stands.
“It’s still early.” I’m not ready for her to go.
“You work tomorrow?”
“Doesn’t matter. I want to see you.”
“Dylan, I’m still trying to process all of this. I want to jump back into us more than you could ever know, but is that just the eighteen-year-old me talking? How do I know? I need time.”
“Okay,” I concede, because pushing her too far too fast will not end in my favor. “I’ll take you home.”
Picking up the blanket, she starts to fold it.
“I can get that.”
“It’s not a problem.” She makes the final two folds. “See, I’m already done.”
I wait for her to place it on the back of the couch, then hold my hand out for her. She takes it and we head back downstairs to my truck. The drive back to her place is quiet and I hate it. Before I even have the truck in Park, I reach over and grab her hand.
“Dylan?”
“Avery.” I turn to face her. I can see from the way she scrunches her eyebrows that she’s confused. “I just need to do this.” Cupping her face, I lean in and press my lips to hers. She’s still until I trace her bottom lip with my tongue; then she opens for me and kisses me back. I don’t think about where we are, who might catch us, not like when we were kids. I couldn’t give a fuck less who sees us. This is my Avery.
“Dylan, we should stop.”
I still, my lips hovering over hers. “Do you want me to stop, Aves?”
“No,” she whispers.
I trail my lips across her cheek and down her neck. She moans, which spurs me on. Sliding my hand behind her neck, I hold her to me while my other hand rests on her thigh, moving higher and higher. My index finger slides under the hem of her jean shorts that have been driving me mad all damn night. I seek out her panties and my finger traces under the hem.
“Dylan.” It’s a plea.
“Tell me, Aves. Tell me what you want.”
“We shouldn’t be doing this.”
“This is all about you, Avery. You tell me what you want.” I kiss the spot on her neck, right under her ear, that always used to drive her crazy. From the way she tilts her head, giving me full access, I know it still does. My index finger is stroking just under the edge of her panties. I’m pushing my luck, but at the same time I’m letting her call the shots. She’s scared, but I know my girl. She wants this just as much as I do.
“More.” She lifts her hips.
“Like this?” Going a little farther, I run my finger through her folds. She’s wet. Bringing her lips back to mine, I kiss her slow and deep, keeping my tongue and finger in sync. She breaks away from the kiss, her head resting sideways on the seat as I bring her closer to the edge. “Tell me what you need, Aves.”
“Don’t move.” She grabs my hands and holds it in place while my finger slides inside of her. “That. So much yes… that,” she pants.
It only takes a few thrusts from my hand and I feel her start to quiver from the inside. “I got you, baby. Just let go.”
She grips my arm, nails digging into the skin. I don’t stop; I can’t. It only takes one more time before I feel her falling over the edge. I slow down but don’t stop, not until she opens her eyes.
“What happened to slow?” she whispers. Her eyes are glassy and she looks as though she’s coming off a major high.
“I love you, Avery. I know I agreed to slow, but I don’t know how I’m going to do it. I can promise you this: no sex until you’ve decided we can give this another shot. A real shot, Avery.”
“What do you call what just happened?”
“Foreplay. Sex is when I get to slide home for the first time in four years. Sex is where I get you naked in a bed for hours—hours, Aves. I’ve missed the hell out of you. I’m not certain it won’t be days.” Leaning in, I kiss her. “Stay put, I’ll get your door.”
This time she actually listens.
“What am I going to do with you, Dylan Knight?” she asks, taking my hand and hopping out of the truck.
I pull her into my arms, her head resting on my chest. “Just love me, Avery. I promise you, if you let me back in, you will never forget it.” I kiss the top of her head before grabbing her hand and leading her to the front door. “One more,” I say, leaning in and kissing her lips. “Night, beautiful.”
Still looking dazed, she turns the knob and disappears inside.