Chapter 11 – Coast to Coast

“Is someone going to wake Dan?” Jason poked Dan’s side.

“Nah, let’s just get them to put him with the luggage and we’ll pick him up at baggage claim,” joked Troy as he slung his backpack over his shoulder.

“I’ll wake him.” I huffed as I removed my lap belt.

“Hopefully not the same way you wake me.” A sly smile crossed Alex’s lips as I passed in front of his seat. I rolled my eyes and smirked as I crossed into the next aisle.

Dan was firmly strapped in, his head tilted back against the headrest, his mouth slightly ajar as he snored softly. His face was devoid of emotion as he slept, blissfully unaware that we had touched down at LAX.

As with every flight, Dan had self-medicated to ease his anxiety for a seemingly irrational fear of flying. I sat in the seat beside him, which had recently been vacated by Troy and softly shook him.

“Dan, we’ve landed. It’s time to wake up”

“Mmmmmmmm,” he mumbled incoherently.

“Dan, we are in LA. It’s time to get off the plane.” I tried again to rouse him.

“Hmmmm Mmmmm” Dan garbled.

“How many did he take?” I shook Dan with a little more force as James came over to inspect. James shrugged as he watched me get out of my seat and kneel on the floor in front of Dan. I took both his shoulders in my hands firmly and shook him violently.

“Dan! Come on!”

A slit of an eye opened as Dan slowly regained consciousness. His head dropped forward as he slowly opened his eyes, the harshness of the overhead cabin lights causing him to squint.

“Dan!” I reached up and grabbed his chin.

“Lexi?” Dan croaked, rubbing his eyes as he tried to clear his throat.

“Yes, it’s Lexi. You need to get up.” I reached into his lap and unhooked his seat belt.

Dan’s eyes seemed to gain more clarity as he tried to focus on me.

“Holy shit, am I dreaming?” He smiled as he looked at me on the floor.

“Take a good look Dan, cause this is the one and only time you are going to see me on my knees in between your legs.”  I smiled.

Dan fumbled for his phone, “Hold on, I need to Instagram this shit.” Alex gently chuckled as he helped me to my feet.

“Dude, you couldn’t have waited five minutes?” Protested Dan as his iPhone sprang to life.

“Fart-Knocker, you think anyone is going to believe Lexi blew YOU, when she is shacked up with HIM?” Troy smacked Dan across the head.

Dan pouted as he raised himself from his seat. Jason and Troy were both still giggling as they made their way to the jet bridge.

James turned on his phone to text Hannah as he strode out behind them, glad to finally be back on US soil and only half a continent away from her.

Alex pressed against my back, his hot breath tickling my neck. “Dan’s going to be having dirty dreams about you for a month.”

“You mean he isn’t already? I’m disappointed!” I pushed back against him.

A soft laugh escaped Alex’s lips as he followed me out the plane.

We passed through customs and immigration quickly, the process for the band made a whole of a lot simpler by being citizens. I flashed my Australian passport in my own line, my working visa stamp and newfound celebrity status also giving me a smooth process.

Our four-man security team headed out in front as we strolled through the International arrivals area. As always, fans and paparazzi were waiting, the familiar gathering a welcome change from the out of control, fevered crowds of Europe.

My phone vibrated as we were herded into the waiting cars.

- Landed at JFK, on my way to your apartment. We in same country code yet? Matt xo

- At LAX, have I ever mentioned how much I hate LA? Taylah has keys and will let you in. Watch out for the Crazy Cat woman in 3C! She’s very touchy/feely :-P Lexi xxx

- Touchy/Feely? Isn’t that the standard Reed greeting or is that just reserved for me?  Just wondering if “no pants” clause is still in play? :-) xo

- “Guidelines” are as previously agreed :-) I’ll call you in the morning. L xxx

“Good news?” Alex asked, my smile still lingering as I pulled my eyes away from my phone.

“Yes, Matt’s arrived. Things can only get easier from here on in!”  I slid my phone into my bag.

Alex’s mouth twisted into his amazing half smile, “I like this development. It means more time for us.”

I snuggled closer into his side as the car slowly drove down the ramp away from the Airport. It was the tail end of May and despite arriving late in the evening, the weather was still warm. I pressed my head against Alex’s chest as the cars zoomed by us, letting my mind wander.

James’ phone chimed as he received another incoming message from Hannah. While she had been enjoying a complication-free pregnancy, she was glad that James was finally closer to home as she entered her final month. 

The relief was evident on his face as he busily messaged her back, flipping his phone over to proudly show me Hannah’s latest “Belly Shot.” “Can you believe that I’m going to be a Dad next month?” His face beamed as I returned his phone.

“You’re going to be Amazing!”

Alex squeezed my hand as he raised it to his lips. I knew what he was thinking. I knew his desire to have a family was only heightened by the impending arrival of Baby Bowden. True to his word, he hadn’t mentioned it again, giving me space to process my own thoughts but I knew that I would have to make a decision sometime.

“Any word from her Obstetrician on if the baby might come early?”

“Nah, She seems to still be some time away. Her due date is still marked as June 23rd but they say it’s hard to predict, especially for a first.” James lovingly stroked the latest sonogram photo saved as the screen lock on his phone.

“We’ll be home by the 14th.” I assured him, knowing that even if Hannah was to go into labour now at most he was only a 5 hour flight away.

“Yeah, I know. I just miss her. I miss being there.” James brought his fingers to his forehead, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Emotion washed over me as I thought back to the countless times I had seen Power Station tour in the past. I had never cared about what they gave up to take their show on the road so we, the audience, could have our fill. The families, the friends they left behind - they were almost sub-human. It just never occurred to me what a sacrifice it was. Their loss of anonymity, the push and pull of public life.

Yeah I know- Don’t feel sorry for the Rock Stars, their lives are fucking amazing and if all they have to do is travel and play like trained monkeys then they really shouldn’t be bitching and moaning. I used to be one of those people, feeling entitled to their time -how quickly my attitude had changed, now I was immersed in it.

 

~~~~~~

 

I wasn’t a fan of Los Angeles. This attitude had accumulated from my first ever trip overseas. Rather than take the traditional boozy trip with my friends to “Schoolies”, an Australian rite of passage for post-graduation high school kids, similar to the American “Spring Break” I decided not to follow a trend and opted to take an adventure by myself to Hollywood. Eighteen years old, naive and with no real life experience, I hopped aboard a Qantas flight bound directly for Los Angeles.

How rude an awakening it had been for me. Having limited funds, I stayed in a “questionable” part of town, which saw me narrowly miss a drive-by shooting at a Jack-in-the-box.  The large expanse of concrete and pollution made up the majority of the landscape and with no real interest in the theme parks; my first impression of the city was that of a functional mess with no redeeming features. The food was bad, you couldn’t walk anywhere and it seemed everyone was either a tourist or a wannabe “something”. I know I probably was skewed by my own unrealistic expectations but it left a bitter taste in my mouth and though I have returned numerous times I liken it to a bowel movement, a means to an end, necessary but don’t expect a postcard.

It was nothing like New York with its vibrancy of the people, the architecture, the museums, the restaurants, the atmosphere. It was a city that seemed REAL. I loved it, it stoked my soul, my heart and my creativity.

“Ugggghhhh” the sound escaped me unintentionally.

“What?” Alex questioned looking up from his iPhone.

I pointed out the window, “I hate LA. It reminds me of a girl you used to date, fake and full of shit.” I was inwardly amused by my analogy.

“Lexi, LA is not that bad,” laughed James.

Alex shook his head. “Firstly, lets agree to not waste anymore of our time discussing anyone I used to date, especially Marcy.  Secondly, any city that has you in it, I am instantly a fan of.” A cheeky smile flirted on his lips.

He was right, we were together so the geographic location shouldn’t matter. Besides, this wasn’t where we were going to set up roots.

“Ughhhhh, I’ll just suck it up I guess.” My lips curved in amusement.

Alex groaned, “I have something else I’d rather you suck.”

“Hey! RIGHT HERE GUYS!!! I’m right here.” James quipped. “Can you keep your hands off each other until you reach the hotel? I know it’s a challenge but I’d rather not have to give a play by play to Dan later.”

“Wouldn’t it be a blow by blow?” I laughed, unable to resist the pun.

“You know what, you guys are freaking just as bad as each other.” James chortled, not the least bit annoyed.

Alex nodded in agreement, “My perfect woman.”

 

~~~~~~

 

LA was tolerable. It was as most of the tour had been, a blur of interviews, performances and appearances.  American fans were a lot more subdued than their European counterparts. We blazed across the country, sometimes spending little more than a day in the city before plane hopping to the next.

The guys were tired and I realized it was because my schedule had been gruelling. My intention was to condense the tour into two months rather than drag it out longer and have James possibly miss the birth of his child. A little suffering now for a greater reward later had been my mantra.

Matt was on fire in New York. He had taken over most of the extended commitments so I could concentrate on just the tour. I loved that he didn’t try and take over; he did his job but allowed all major decisions to be vetted by me. We were so in tune. I was so grateful to have him in my corner, not only for his impeccable work standard but his unparalleled loyalty. I loved him. Not in the same way I loved Alex, but in a way I hadn’t experienced with a man before. Friendship seemed like such an understatement of our connection, he was pure sunshine that warmed my soul.

It was thinking of Matt and my adoration of him that gave me an idea. It had been something that had been on my mind for a while but I needed to check the logistics and legality of it before speaking to him. After everything he had given to me, I wanted to give him something back. Something that would convey to him, what he meant to me. I was ecstatic when Emily Mathews, a lawyer I’d recently retained emailed me confirming the details.

We were on board a plane bound for Miami, our final destination for this tour when I send him an email.

 

From- Lexi Reed

To- Matthew Burns

Subject- Do you like Cuban Food?

Hiya Cowboy,

I’m currently traveling at 36,000 feet, isn’t technology grand!

Can you do me a favour? Book first flight out of NYC and come to Miami! I hear the food and clubs down there are amazing. Pack a swim suit, we’ll do business by the pool.

Lexi xx

 

Alex slept soundly in the seat beside me. I could tell he was exhausted. I was glad we were going to be able to take a break soon. I relished in the idea of spending a few days in bed with him, not having to be anywhere.

My iPad pinged, alerting of an incoming message.

 

From- Matthew Burns

To- Lexi Red

Subject- Don’t fall out of the sky!

Lexi,

I still don’t trust wi-fi on planes. How can it have “affected instrumentation” before and now it’s cool?

Cuban food sounds interesting but surely whatever business needs attending can be done from our office? Anything up? Or is this some elaborate scheme to get me in a swim suit by the pool? :-)  I’ll remind you that as my boss, you are restrained by the sexual harassment in the workplace legislation. :-P

How’s Rock Star?

Matt xox

 

From- Lexi Reed

To- Matthew Burns

Subject- Insubordination

Mr. Burns,

I’ll remind you that according to the terms of your employment you are required to be at my beck and call.

Come on it will be fun! So stop arguing with me and HAUL ASS.

Rock star is astoundingly perfect. I love him so much.

Lexi xx

 

From- Matthew Burns

To - Lexi Reed

Subject- It always ends up being about my Ass doesn’t it? :-)

Ms. Reed,

I am aware of my terms of employment, I was merely trying to suggest a more cost effective way to reach our objective.

If you need me in Miami, I’m there.

YOU are astoundingly perfect, he’s lucky to have you. I’m glad you have opened your heart.

Matt xo

 

Yes, all the pieces were coming together. I smiled to myself as I closed my iPad and stowed it away.

“You look rather pleased with yourself.” Alex slid an eye open and yawned.

“Just business. Things are failing into place. I’m having Matt fly over to Miami.” I ran my fingers through his startlingly sexy hair.  Even messed from sleeping he still looked amazing, his stubble playing on his breathtaking jaw.

“What business?” Alex sat up in his seat a little straighter, a mischievous smile flirting on his lips. “Are you thinking of having some down time in Miami? Maybe sit by the pool with me?” I could tell he was hopeful.

“Well... that is part of the benefit. Just be patient and wait ok. I don’t want to jinx it until I am a hundred percent sure it’s all going ahead but I am almost positive you will like it.”

As much as I hated keeping things from Alex, I wanted Matt to be the first to know.

Alex pouted playfully, “Fine, I’ll wait.”

“Thanks baby, I promise it will be a good surprise.” I moved my hand to his chin, letting his rough stubble prickle my fingers. I loved the way he looked, slightly unshaven, it almost made him look sexier.

The cabin crew announced we were making our final decent into Miami, instructing everyone to return their seats to their upright position and stow away any bags or electronic devices.

I opened the window shutter, the dark night littered with lights as we turned for our final approach. I felt my stomach lunge as we dropped in altitude and my ears popped. The lights marking the edges of the runway became clearer as we came into land. I closed my eyes as I felt the slight jolt of the tires making contact with the tarmac. Touch down. I heard the whistle of the air breaks and the ailerons as the plane rolled along the runway before slowing to a stop.

“Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Miami. Local time is 10.45 p.m. and the temperature is a balmy 75 degrees. We hope you have enjoyed your flight with us this evening and your Captain and Cabin Crew thank you for choosing Delta Airlines.”

I opened my eyes as I felt the release of my lap belt, Alex’s hands sliding from my lap.

“We’re here, I can’t wait to see how good we are in Miami.”

It seemed to be a running theme with us, judging the city we visited by our insatiable bedroom antics. Not that we could ever use that information on Trip Adviser but it amused us and provided much needed sanity for the daily gruel of non stop travel.

“I don’t know Alex, Atlanta is going to be hard to beat!”  I traced his hard pectoral muscles through his thin t-shirt.

“Oh I got moves baby, you haven’t seen yet.” Alex’s eyes glistened with promise. He took my hand and led me out of the plane, our motley group of sleepy rock stars yawning and grumbling behind us.

“Car is ready Lexi.” DarNell, pulled the phone away from his ear.

“You guys go on ahead and I’ll go with Brad and get the bags.” Bear waved us on. Brad nodded as he followed Bear.

Brad was HUGE, almost seven foot tall and built like a linebacker, but barely spoke. He fitted in well but despite traveling the globe with him, I hardly knew anything about him. I knew he was originally from Tampa and went to Rutgers University on a football scholarship. He dropped out after an injury on the field bent his knee ninety degrees in the opposite direction putting to bed any chance he had to play professionally. He was quiet but polite and when he stared down reporters they moved the hell out of the way.

“Thank you Bear, Brad. I’ll see you both back at the hotel.” I waved as we walked purposely through the arrivals lounge, flanked by DarNell and Jake.

There was only a small gathering of die-hard fans at the airport. I had guessed it was due to the late time of our arrival. Though tired, each of the band members quickly posed for photos and signed a few autographs before DarNell finally pushed them into waiting cars.

My iPhone beeped as an incoming text message arrived.

- Flight Booked. Arrive tomorrow 9 a.m. Will email flight details. Matt xo

- Yay! I’ll send a car to pick you up. Night. L xxx

I was relieved to know that Matt would be here in the morning, it had been a while since we saw each other, too long in fact.

Our cavalcade of cars travelled down the Palmetto Express way on route to our hotel the Ritz-Carlton in Coconut Grove.  I pressed my head against the glass of the Escalade, it’s dark windows fogging under my hot breath.

The Ritz-Carlton was a stunning hotel, hosting a breathtaking view of Biscayne Bay and Miami’s vibrant skyline.  We had been greeted by a super efficient concierge who had us checked in and ushered us to our suites in record time, earning him a big fat tip.

I had barely closed the door when Alex had me pressed against a wall, his hands fisting my hair, his mouth hungrily on mine. My body responded as I melted into his tall, muscular frame, my leg hooking around his hip as he feverishly kissed me.

“Greedy?” I moaned as Alex pulled at my shirt, sending the buttons flying as the fabric strained against his fingers.

“I need you.” Alex hissed into my mouth, removing his t-shirt and kicking off his shoes.

“I need you too.” I clawed against his bare back, while his hands fell down to my skirt. He fumbled angrily with the zipper till it finally slid down and pushed my skirt to the violently to the ground.

“Easy on the clothes Asshole, that skirt cost me eight hundred bucks.” I stepped out of it and pushed hard against his chest, forcing him back.

“Fuck the skirt, it was in my way. I’ll write you a cheque.” Alex clipped, gliding me forward with him toward the bedroom.

My hands pulled at the waistband of his jeans, then slid down to the where the denim strained against his waiting erection.

“Ready for me?” I panted, pulling at his belt, desperate to get off his jeans.

“Always ready for you. My cock was made for you”. He helped me push down his jeans and kicked them off.

“Nice sentiment even though it’s bullshit.”  I groaned as I threw him down onto the king size bed.

His back flattened against the mattress, the weight of his body causing ripples to travel through the bed. I kicked off my shoes as I climbed on top of him, his hot mouth clamping over my tender breast, his teeth racking across the delicate lace of my bra.

I drew in a sharp breath as he clawed at the back strap, the fabric snapping across my chest as he pulled.

“That bra was La Perla, this is becoming an expensive exercise for you!” I pushed down his cotton trunks, his throbbing length springing free.

“Worth every penny,” Alex moaned as he pulled my hands around behind me, pinning them firmly in place so that my chest jutted forward involuntarily, giving his mouth unrestricted access to my breasts. His hot tongue swirled around each erect nipple slowly, sending pleasure pulsing through my body.

I closed my eyes and I felt my body temperature rise. He relinquished his grasp around my wrists, moving his hands all over my torso, a trail of fire following his touch. I grabbed his hips and pulled them up toward me, his hot, hard length finding its mark between my legs. The friction as he moved up and down drove me crazy, soaking my lace panties thoroughly.

“Don’t stop!” I panted as his throbbing erection pulsed up and down the length of my clit.

“I want to feel how wet you are, knowing it’s for me,” Alex growled in my ear as his hand reached down between my thighs.

“These, need to go.” He took the delicate lace of my panties into his strong, agile fingertips.  I felt the pressure and then the distinct sound of ripping fabric as they came apart in his hands. “I hope you weren’t too attached to those.” A wicked half smile twisted on his lips.

The skin on skin contact pulled me further into oblivion as my wetness coated him.

“Right now... I need you...in me” I panted as my lips covered his, my hands traveling over his sculptured chest uncontrollably.

Alex lifted my hips as I desperately tried to grind against him and in one swift movement flipped me over onto my back. His body towered above mine as I squirmed below him trying to gain friction.

“I’m driving.” Alex eyes were seething with lust.

My hands threaded through his hair, pulling his head toward me. I kissed him passionately but roughly and bit his lip. I raised my hips impatiently as he settled between my legs.

“I wanted to take this slow but you make it impossible.” His voice struggled as he breathed in.

“We can do slow later, right now I need you to fuck me. Please...Just fuck me, HARD!” I demanded unable to hold it together any longer.

Every inch of my body was aroused. My skin burned, the ache in my groin was unbearable and even the follicles in my head tingled. I needed him. In the most animalistic way, I needed him. I didn’t want to do slow, I didn’t want to make it last longer, I wanted him now, I wanted my release NOW.

“Seeing as you said Please.” He grabbed his throbbing cock in his hand as he lifted slightly off me, guiding into my wet, hot centre. I gasped as it filled me, its girth straining against me as I tilted to take more of him in.

He took my knees and pulled them up, as he rammed me harder, the force making my eyes water slightly. The pain mixed with pleasure seared through me as he took me just beyond my limit of comfort.

“Is this what you want?” He moaned as I felt him swelling even further inside me.

“Yes!” I screamed as I met each one of his thrusts. It was rough and desperate. I couldn’t slow down.

His hands gripped me tighter.  As his fingers pushed into my skin, his mouth sucked at my neck.

As he pumped deeper and harder into me I winced, he slowed sensing I might be in pain.

“Don’t you dare stop!” I screamed as I grabbed his taut, athletic ass and pushed him further into me.

He was so deep that I thought I might tear. My body ached as I arched, contorted beyond its limits. My inner muscles clamped around him as he thrust in and out of me.

“Lexi...” He growled, “You are going to make me come” His eyes filled with heat.

I couldn’t speak as my body tensed further. It felt so good. I gasped as his pace quickened, I couldn’t hold out any longer. “Aghhhhhh!” I screamed as pleasure ripped through my body, causing it to shake. “Alex...Oh… My... God!” I felt my orgasm roll over me, waves and waves of pleasure flowed through every inch of me.

“Lexi” Alex hissed as my release sent him into his own spiral of pleasure. “Ahhh, Lexi... Ohhh... Ahhh…” He continued to thrust as he unravelled, filling me with his hot, thick load.

My body shook as his orgasm intensified mine. I gripped him; my finger nails ripping into his flesh, panting as we rode it out together, unable to speak.

Alex pulled my mouth to his, my lips were frenzied as I kissed him. “That. was. so. fucking. hot” he breathed, in between kisses.

“Better than Atlanta?” I moaned into his mouth.

Alex laughed, “After that, I don’t even remember Atlanta.”

He released my body and slowly rolled off me, the sensation of him pulling out of me, almost making me come again.

“Ahhhhh,” I moaned. It felt so good.

“I love hearing that noise.” He gently bit my lip.

I looked up and smiled, his body glistened with sweat, as mine did. My eyes closed with exhaustion as he swept me into his arms, laying my head onto his chest.

“Lexi...” I felt Alex’s breathing starting to slow “Usually if there are two ways to take something, you will take it in the way I didn’t mean. But... I’m going to ask you anyway.”

“What?” I yawned sleepily, not really wanting to have a conversation right now.

“Don’t get me wrong, THAT was AMAZING. It was incredibly hot and it took every inch of restraint I had to hold off as long as I did…” Alex’s finger trace along my arm.

“But?” I forced my foggy brain to stay awake.

“But... what was all that about? You seemed like you were on some kind of a mission?” I heard the question in his voice.

Despite fear of pissing me off, Alex didn’t hold back with me. It was one of the biggest turn ons. He wasn’t threatened by me and he met me as an equal. While we had sex constantly, usually it wasn’t as rough or as desperate as what just happened.

“You trying to make me mad?” I smiled, as I looked into his clear blue eyes.

“You trying to make me hard?” He grinned back.

I took a long deep breath, I trusted him.... it had taken me months but I finally trusted him. “Alex, I love you. I have never been with anyone like you, not just sexual but emotionally. I know I’m difficult to be around sometimes but yet you are still here.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Alex’s eyebrow raised as he looked bewildered.

“Because most guys would have run by now.” I breathed out slowly, “I feel like I can be myself with you, that I can be just as fucked up as I really am and you won’t judge me.”

“Baby, listen to me. I don’t run. Yes, I pushed you away in the past thinking it is what you wanted but now that I know that you want me, I will never leave you. No matter how fucked up you think you are, I will never see you as anything less than perfect.”

“Alex...” I started.

“No, Lexi. Let me finish. I know there is stuff in your past that we haven’t discussed, who knows, maybe we won’t ever talk about it but it doesn’t change who you are and what you mean to me. I need you to know that.” His tone was soft despite the severity of the words.

“I know. It’s taken me so long but, I know. I feel the same way. I was so scared to let you in, I mean really let you in but I can’t fight it anymore. I don’t want to. I need to be with you and for the first time it doesn’t make me feel like that makes me less of who I am. I want this... all of this.”  My eyes met his gaze as the words fell from my mouth.

“And while I love this amazing body of yours...” I traced the lines of his spectacular sculpted torso “You aren’t intimated by me. You don’t think less of me. You don’t expect me to sit down and shut up. I can tell you to fuck me and you don’t get all weird. Being with you doesn’t make me feel less of a woman. I feel empowered yet still... sexy. I never expected to find that.”

“Baby, I love you, all of you. Yes, you drive me completely insane sometimes but that’s what makes you, you. I don’t want a puppet. I want someone who can think for themselves. I want a partnership. As for you telling me to fuck you - Biggest turn on ever. I love that you know what you want, I don’t want you to ever hold back with me. No matter what crazy, depraved, insane ideas you have....” His mouth twisted into his delicious half smile.

“And as for sexy... you fucking blow that definition out of the water.” His eyes darkened as he raked them up and down my naked body.

I felt the heat return to me. I no longer felt tired or sleepy. “Make love to me Alex.”

He slowly lowered his lips to mine. It wasn’t like the first time - it was gentle and tender.

His hands glided over me, his touch soft and considerate. I felt my need rising again, needing to feel him again.

He took me slowly, every touch and caress taking longer than it needed to. I savoured it. He built me up gradually, there was no urgency this time for either of us. I loved it, slow and maddening but I loved it.

My body melded into his perfectly, responding to his every touch. It was beautiful; he took me to the brink and then backed off, prolonging my pleasure. He knew my body so well and he knew what to do to make me feel good.

I slid off of his body, wanting to pleasure him with my mouth. I watched his face as he looked down at me. His desire for me and his need was written clearly, yet he was unwilling to allow himself his release.

We moved all over each other, yielding to each of our needs, not willing to stop, until we couldn’t bear it any longer and we came together, intensely.

It had been so different from before and yet just as amazing. I loved fucking him just as much as I loved making love to him and for the first time ever, I didn’t have to choose. With Alex, I could have both.