Chapter 23 – Fading to Black

There was a constant and annoying beeping in my ear. As I tried to move, unimaginable pain raged through my body. I wasn’t sure if I was awake or dreaming. My brain felt so disconnected from the rest of me. It felt like I was in a deep, dark hole – alone. Where the hell was I?

“Lexi, come back to me.” Alex’s pained voice begged me. He sounded so far away. “I need you, don’t leave me baby.”

“Alex, I’m here! I’m not leaving you” I tried to scream but my mouth refused to move. I need to tell him, I need to let him know, I’m here!  Something in his voice made me shudder. He sounded wounded, desperate. Was he hurt? I needed to find him.

There was a quiet knocking in the distance and some hushed voices. I had to strain to hear them, “Go... no change... we’ll call... unresponsive.” What the fuck where they talking about? I couldn’t make out anymore, the beeping was getting louder. Alex... where are you? Don’t go! Don’t go, I’m here.

I struggled with my body as I summoned every ounce of strength I had, my eyes flung open and were blinded by light. Ughhhhhhh the light hurt my eyes and they slammed shut. I moaned as I tried to open them again.

“Lexi?” Alex’s voice was closer but no less desperate.

“Alex... I’m here.” I mumbled as I forced a lid slowly open, “Don’t go.”

“Lexi! I’m not leaving! Baby, I’m here! Get a Doctor!”  Alex roared, his voice now directly above me.

“Alex...” Slowly the world came into focus. Alex’s face was inches away from mine, his hand tightly clasped around my fingers. “...where am I?”

“You are in the hospital.” Alex swallowed. He looked like hell. “Do you remember anything?”

I searched my mind for a memory, the last thing I could think of. I was in my apartment. Waiting for Marcy. A knock at the door - him. No! No! No! I said no.

“No!!!” I screamed as the horror came back to me, “I said NO!”

My chest expanded as I struggled to breathe, each painful moment came flooding back. His hands on me. The beeping accelerated and an alarm went off.

Alex squeezed my hand, his eyes measuring my reaction. He knew. “Shhhhh. You’re safe baby. You’re safe.” 

A warm feeling flushed through my body as I started to relax, there was a nurse next to me injecting something into my IV.  “Relax Sweetheart, this will calm you down.”

“I don’t want drugs, I want out of here.” I couldn’t make my mouth say it aloud. The panic grew. Where was he? Was he coming back? I needed to be awake, I wouldn’t go back to sleep.

“Lexi, baby, you need to relax. No one can hurt you. Look at me, I am NOT letting anyone hurt you, ever.” Alex soothed me but there was a resolute determination in his eyes. It was a look I’d never seen him wear before.

“I want to go home Alex, take me home. Take me back to New York.” I begged, desperate to make my point made before whatever was injected into me took over. The sleepy fog had returned but I was desperately fighting it.

“Shhhhh. I will take you home baby. Just sleep now.” Alex gently stroked my hair.

“No... Please... I don’t want to sleep.” I slurred.

~~~~~~

BLACK

~~~~~~

Back down the hole I tumbled. I hated it down here. So far away from everything. I heard the muffled voices.

“Has she said anything? I can stay with her if you want to go get some rest.” While I had to struggle to hear the words, there was no mistaking the voice. It was Emma. Her beautiful, melodic tone was concerned as she spoke.

“She remembers. How much I don’t know, but she knows what that animal did to her. Thanks for the offer but there is no way I’m leaving her. You are welcome to stay if you want though.” Alex’s voice floated above me. I hated being in this hole. So far away from him.

“Alex, she is a fighter. He tried to destroy her once before and failed. He won’t win. He is behind bars now and he will never hurt her or anyone again. She will come back to us, you’ll see.” Emma had been there through the first time. While she’d never interfered, I remembered her concern. She had never liked him.

“Jail is too good for that fucking son of a bitch. If he ever gets out, I will track him down and kill him. I should never have left her. I can’t lose her... I just can’t lose her.” Alex’s voice broke.

No... Alex... you won’t lose me. “No” I managed to mumble. My mouth wouldn’t cooperate to tell him the rest.

“Lexi? I’m here,” Alex murmured. “Baby, you’re safe.”

“Home,” I begged. “Want...Home.” I wanted to go away from this place that kept tossing me down this deep, dark hole. I wanted to be far away from all this hurt and pain.

“Shhhh Baby. I will take you home. I promise.” Alex pressed some kind of buzzer, I didn’t hear any noise but felt the vibrations.

“Mr. Stone, does your wife need more pain relief?” A male voice asked.

“No, I want to transport her to a hospital in New York. Get me whatever paperwork I need and organize the transfer now.” Alex demanded.

“Mr. Stone, I can assure you that we are a state of the art hospital and she is receiving the best of care. I’ve been over her charts, she is recovering but I wouldn’t recommend moving her.” The voice argued.

“Dr. Lee, this is not about the level of care she is receiving. Is there any medical danger to her being moved?” Alex voice was authoritative and curt. I could hear his impatience.

“Any transporting of patients carries an inherent risk which is why I would recommend waiting to fly.”  Dr. Lee, I assumed?

“This is not a discussion Doctor, answer the question. Can she fly?” Alex barked.

“Yes, her cerebral edema had receded satisfactorily but she would need to be sedated and have a medical transport.”

“Make it happen!” Alex hissed.

“Mr. Stone...” Dr. Lee started.

“I said, make it happen.” Alex didn’t allow him to finish.

“Alex, do you think you should do that? Wouldn’t it be more traumatic for her to wake up somewhere else?” Emma tentatively asked.

“Emma, she wants to go home. If taking her there will ease even a tiniest bit of her suffering then that is what I am going to do. I’m sorry, I know you love her but I won’t change my mind. I’m taking her away from this... from here.” Alex’s voice was determined, he wouldn’t be swayed. He was taking me home.

~~~~~~

BLACK

~~~~~~

I woke up to the sound of jet noise. I was strapped tightly to a stretcher and it felt like Dave Lombardo from Slayer was playing a drum solo in my head. It hurt so much I couldn’t see straight. I moaned.

“Lexi.” I heard my name but I couldn’t be sure of who had called it. Was it Alex?

“Pain,” I moaned as the relentless thumping continued. Jesus Dave… take a break already!

“We’re coming in to land Baby, it’s almost over.”

The tires made contact with the tarmac, there was a slight jolt as the plane touched down and tried to slow along the runway.  The sting of tears burned my eyes as the pain travelled down my body. I was broken, truly broken.

~~~~~~

BLACK

~~~~~~

“What were you thinking Alex? Moving her like that!” Matt’s beautiful voice filled the room.

Matt. I’d missed him so much. My body was paralysed, my eyes slammed shut. I could hear perfectly but I couldn’t will myself awake.

“Hey man, back up. It’s what she wanted and I’ll be damned if I was going to let her lie there and beg me for something and not deliver.” Alex’s voice was cold and angry.

“So what do we know about the fucking bastard who did this to her?” Matt calmed as he came closer.

“There was no signs of forced entry, she must have let him in. I don’t know the whys or the hows and quite frankly I’m losing my fucking mind over it. Her phone records show no contact with him, it’s like he just materialized. The cops caught him...” Alex paused “...with his hands on her. She won’t need to testify. He has priors so there is no chance of him getting out of this one.” His voice was a mix of hurt, anger and disgust. He didn’t sound like my Alex any more, some stranger was in his place.

There was a slight tap on the door, shuffling and then foot steps. I listened, heels! The distinct clicking of heels on a hard surface coming toward me. Taylah? Hannah? Who was it?

“This isn’t the time or the place. Get out!” Alex seethed, who ever it was he didn’t like her. 

“Alex please, let me explain.” Marcy sobbed.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Get her out of here! I couldn’t believe the fucking bitch had the nerve to come here after what she had orchestrated! Why the fuck had Alex let her through the door?

“This is nothing to do with you. I don’t care for your well wishes.” Alex clipped impatiently.

The hell it doesn’t have anything to do with her.

“I want to say sorry, I need to apologize.” Marcy cried, “This is not what I wanted.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? My wife’s battered, unconscious body is laying there and you are trying to make this about you? I don’t give a fuck about how you feel. If you need someone to talk to, call a fucking therapist. What we had was nothing, less than nothing. So I’m not going to sit here and discuss your fragile insecurities cause I dumped you almost a year ago.” Alex raged.

“No... this isn’t about that. I know...I know you didn’t love me. I’m sorry...I’m sorry for what happened to Lexi.” Marcy sniffed.

“Marcy. Thanks for your concern but I think you should leave” Matt’s voice was diplomatic but cool.

“You... don’t know?” Marcy squeaked.

“Know what?” Alex roared.

Marcy dissolved into tears. I didn’t know what was worse. The unbearable pain or having to listen to this bitch. I hated her breathing the same air as me, continuing to try and manipulate the situation. WAKE UP GOD DAMN IT!

“Know what?” Alex demanded, his voice boomed through the room.

“Ummm... I... He was just supposed to talk to her... Make you jealous... It was stupid. I…I wasn’t thinking.” Marcy spluttered through tears.

“What the fuck did you do Marcy?” Alex voice was barely a hiss.

“I... I found him, the only real boyfriend she ever had. I did some digging into her past and he was the only one that seemed to come up. I spoke to him on the phone a few times and he seemed charming. I guess I hoped they’d rekindle something. I wasn’t thinking straight. And when I found out you guys were going to be in Australia, it seemed perfect. I gave him her address so he’d know where to find her. He seemed so nice, like he was happy to be able to see her again. He lied to me, told me he loved her. I didn’t know he would hurt her,” she whispered.

“Alex, get off her man. Dude, stop.” Matt urged as I heard a scuffle around me.

“Alex.” I summoned all the strength I had and opened my eyes. Alex had his hands around Marcy’s throat while Matt tried to peel him off. Alex’s eyes were cold, livid, animalistic.

He looked at me and dropped his grip on Marcy. She coughed, gasping for breath as she crumbled to the floor.

“Lexi!” He was at my bedside in a second, almost as if he moved faster than my eyes could register.

“Alex!” I repeated, my voice was coarse like I had swallowed a bunch of gravel.

“I’m here, Baby.” Alex’s eyes softened as he stroked my forehead tenderly.

“I want to speak to her,” I croaked. The fire in my throat was throbbing. Had I actually swallowed something?

“No.” Alex hissed through his clenched jaw, “She has done enough.”

“It’s not your call. I need to know something.” I gestured for Marcy to come closer.

She hesitated, I could see the fear in her eyes. That’s it bitch, you are right to be scared.

“Lexi. I’m...” Marcy got closer but still kept her distance.

“Were you even there?” I cut her off. I didn’t want her feeble apologies. They meant nothing to me.

Alex glanced between us, trying to play catch up. He had no idea what I was talking about but I could tell by his body language that he was ready to start World War Three. I guess the whole male protective instinct is deeper ingrained than I had thought. His look was primal, savage - he wanted blood.

“Answer me! When you called, were you even in the country?” I needed to know how premeditated this had been.

“No. I was in New York.” Marcy winced as she wiped the tears from her eyes. “He never told me he would do this... he spoke so lovingly about you. He fooled me Lexi. I would never have allowed this...” I held my hand up to stop her. Was she hoping to justify her actions? Surely she isn’t that stupid? I summoned all my strength to formulate my words.

“That innocent bullshit might work on other people but you really aren’t that good of an actress. While you may not have known what was about to go down, you knew it was trouble. Why else did you search for a part of my life that has been buried for so long? Did you think I would cheat on my husband? Or perhaps you were just hoping to have him photographed leaving my apartment? Either way, you knew it wasn’t going to be happy reunions, so do me and the rest of the world a favour and lose the tears, cause the bimbo routine is getting fucking old.”

Marcy stared at me, stunned. The colour drained from her face as she realised the severity of her actions; her hands were dirty. If she wanted forgiveness she would need to go to church, cause she was getting none in this room.

“Get out!” I growled, I’d heard enough. I wanted her gone.

Matt grabbed her arms and gently escorted her to the door. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to be diplomatic or he didn’t trust Alex, but either way I was glad he removed her, following her out and closing the door behind them.

Alex’s face was tormented with emotions, I could tell he had questions. I sensed his anger. Was it’s cause that I hadn’t told him or because I’d agreed to meet Marcy by myself? He chewed his lip as he sat silently beside me. A wall shot up between us, I felt the ice from his steely facade.

“Say it,” I whispered. The silence was something I didn’t want to endure right now, not from him.

“Say what?” He cocked his eyebrow. I couldn’t decipher whether he was avoiding it or if he honestly didn’t know what I was talking about.

“It’s written on your face. You want to know why I didn’t tell you she called, why I didn’t tell you I was meeting her. Say it!” I snapped.

“Lexi,” Alex breathed, “now isn’t the time. I only want you to get better. Nothing else matters right now.” He ran his hand through his impossibly perfect hair; even sleep deprived and emotional he still looked amazing.

I did my best to turn my battered body onto my side, rolling away from him. I just couldn’t bare it any longer.

“Don’t do it Lexi, don’t shut me out.” Alex’s hand gently stroked my hair.

Shut him out? He had seen me more naked than anyone ever had. I had laid myself bare for him. What the hell more did he want? I was too exhausted to give anything else right now. Maybe I’d read him wrong, maybe it was just concern in his eyes? Either way I had to worry about myself right now. I need to heal and not just my body.