Chapter 21 – Eyes Wide Open

Our eventful day started in the morning with a visit to my old office at Cole. Kate was her usual self, buzzing around the office, inciting fear into the uninitiated.  It was good to see everyone and meet the new faces. It had definitely been time for me to move on. While I had loved working at Cole, there was so much more I was capable of doing and now I had a chance to explore.

I was my own boss, I got to make my own rules and I would rise and fall by my own doing. The responsibilities and the risks were now mine and what’s more there were people who looked to me to lead them.

Anna had recently arrived in New York. I had missed her by a day on our trans-pacific cross over.  Matt had informed me she had settled into the apartment well and had already had her initiation with Taylah. Taylah had sent me an email early this morning.

 

From: Taylah Nixon

To: Lexi Stone

Subject: G’day mate and Shit :-)

Hey Lexi, hope you haven’t been mauled by a Koala bear! I know they look cute but I saw them on the Discovery channel and I reckon those sons-o-bitches would claw your eyes out if given half a chance - don’t believe the hype! Met your girl Anna yesterday and you Aussie girls sure know how to party! Fun times, we are so having Girls night when you get back - you owe me that for getting married without allowing me a chance to throw you a bachelorette party. Not like the baby shower you planned for your friend Hannah either, real booze and strippers! If you don’t have a headache in the morning, I’m hanging my head in shame. No baking either! I attempted to cook after you left thinking I might try it in my own kitchen and I speared my foot with a fucking knife! Needed stitches and a freaking tetanus shot. Dave and I made an executive decision that I don’t do that again.

How’s the husband? Hope you’re allowing the poor man to come up for air! He still needs to be functional when you get back. James will kill you if you break him!  :-)

Things here are the same, Dana on twelve wants me to re-do her bedroom and she has picked the most god-awful color pallet I’ve ever seen. I wish I had a nickel for each time these rich bitches had taste - I’d have a solid 15 cents by now. HA!

Ok, need to fly. See you when you get back. Miss ya face!

T x

PS you need to move back in. The penthouse is opening up end of the month. Messy divorce and they have to sell- I told the agent that I’m pretty sure it’s haunted so I can score you a good price! Love ya xxx

 

I did miss living next to Taylah. Alex’s apartment complex was more upmarket and consequently attracted more “conservative” residents.  Maybe it was something we could consider? A fresh start, somewhere neither of us had history and we could build new memories. A clean slate.

We had decided to return back to the apartment just after lunch. Jackson had been pretty enthusiastic about getting Alex to go check out his band’s SALT’s new material so had invited us out to a gig later tonight. Usually, I would be super excited to go out and see a live band, especially given the high calibre the Melbourne music scene usually offered, but I was still a little drained from yesterday’s exhausting showdown with my family.

“Go hang out with Jacks, Baby. I think I’m just going to go to bed early.” I smiled as I lay across my couch kicking off my shoes.

“Lexi, I can stay home with you if you aren’t feeling well?” Alex looked concerned as he knelt beside me.

“No, no... I’m not sick. Just feeling a little off. Drained. I’m fine, I promise. I just don’t feel like going out but I want you to go. I think it would really mean a lot to Jackson and I know you will have a good time.” I protested.

I didn’t want to turn into those couples that had to spend every waking moment together. It was important that we still did things by ourselves and maintained our old friendships. The biggest mistake I had made in my past was losing my sense of self. While I knew there was no danger of that happening now, Alex couldn’t be more different than him, I wanted this to be healthy - for both of us.  Besides I really was ok, just physically tired.

He looked at me hesitantly, “Are you sure? Did you want me to call someone to come stay with you?”

“Alex, look at me! I don’t need a babysitter. I am fine, really - I am seriously ok. You can’t second-guess me and it’s ok for me to be by myself. Remember I used to live here by myself for years? I will be ok.” I reassured him.

“Ok.” He conceded, grabbing his phone to call Jackson while I curled up on the couch and closed my eyes.

 

~~~~~~~

 

The trill of Alex’s phone woke me as I looked around, confused about where I was. The room was dark. As I glanced around I realized I was still in my lounge room, my arms and legs stiff from being curled up in one position for so long.

I couldn’t see or hear Alex and the apartment sounded empty as I reached for his phone on the coffee table.

“Hello” my voice croaked as I pulled the phone to my ear, the buzzing noise of silence greeted me.

“Hello?” I asked again, checking to see I didn’t accidentally hit the reject button when I answered. It was then I noticed the screen identified who the call was and that we were still connected.

“Marcy, what do you want?” I sneered into the phone. I really wasn’t in the mood for her bullshit tonight. Really, when was this bitch going to give up? What did she want and why the fuck couldn’t she just leave us alone?

“Well, you really do have Alex on a short leash, don’t you?” Marcy seemed to have grown a pair since the last time I’d spoken to her. “I never thought I’d see the day Alex Stone was pussy whipped.”

I couldn’t help but laugh, “Oh Marcy, really? I’m sure Alex will be so glad you called to check on his welfare. Oh wait? He doesn’t want to have anything to do with you. He left you. So take all the cheap shots you want at me, but the reason he isn’t talking to you has nothing to do with my pussy and everything to do with yours!”

“Lexi, look. I know you two are married and I really don’t want to start trouble. I just want to talk.” Marcy’s voice wavered as she changed tactics.

“So, talk.” I sat up and stretched my limbs, part of me wondering if she had attempted to call Alex previously and he hadn’t told me.

“Not on the phone.” Marcy sputtered, “I want to talk to you in person. Just me and you. We can work this out like two adult women.”

“Marcy, as much as I would love to have a girlie chat with you, that isn’t possible. We’re away at the moment.” Did she think we were going to sit down with hot chocolate and paint each other’s nails? What drugs is this chick on?

“Yeah...I know... You’re in Melbourne, right?” Marcy responded.

How the fuck did she know that?! I stupidly looked around excepting to see a camera and Ashton Kutcher jumping out telling me I’d been Punk’d!

“Yes, we are. How did you know that?” I asked, not sure I was going to like the answer.

“It doesn’t matter. Look I’m in town. Can I come meet you? No Alex, just us.”

“What the fuck Marcy? Are you stalking us? Cause this shit is getting old! Fine, you can meet me at my apartment, say what you need to say and then you fucking drop this, agreed?”

Deep down my gut told me this was a bad idea, nothing she said was going to change my view on her. She was a manipulative bitch and there was never going to be a reason for us to be friends. The only thing we had in common was Alex, and he wanted nothing more to do with her. Why wouldn’t she let this go? Was it her wounded pride? The fact that her ex fell in love and married a “nobody”? The tabloids had sold hundreds of copies of their trashy rags exploiting our relationship in the beginning “Rock Star slumming with the hired help!” Some even insinuated that the Marcy drama had made him crave the simpler life. Neither headline had been true, not that they ever let the truth get in the way of a good story.

“Perfect. I can be there in an hour. I don’t have a pen with me so if you text me your address I can just input it into the GPS,” Marcy crooned, obviously pleased I was agreeing to hear her out.

“Bye.” I ended the call. I quickly sent Marcy a text with my address and placed Alex’s phone back on the coffee table.

The room was completely dark except for a solitary lamp that was lit, sitting on the corner table. I noticed a small yellow post-it note stuck to the base of the lamp.

You looked too peaceful to wake. Gone with Jacks. Love you - Alex xo

I went and collected my phone from the kitchen counter and checked the time. It was 10 p.m., I had been asleep for hours. I was usually such a light sleeper but I didn’t hear Alex leave, I must have been more tired than I thought.

My phone buzzed in my hands, startling me and causing me to drop it back on the bench. Shit! I picked it up and saw DarNell’s name across my screen.

“Lexi Reed,” I answered, turning on the kitchen light, my eyes squinting to adjust to the harshness of the halogen.

“Hey Baby!” Alex’s beautiful voice immediately put me at ease. “I’m a tool and forgot my phone on the coffee table. Did I wake you?”

“No, you didn’t wake me Baby.” I didn’t bother to tell him that Marcy had already taken care of that. “I’m just…” I yawned “I was wiped. I didn’t hear you leave.”

“Yeah, I kissed you goodbye but you looked so tired I thought it was better to let you sleep. Are you sure you aren’t sick?” The bar noise in the background made it difficult to hear him.

“I don’t know, maybe? I’m just going to crawl into bed and catch up on emails. Is Jackson’s band playing yet?” The clinking of glasses distracted me.

“No they haven’t started yet and no work Lexi. Matt and Anna can handle things until we get back. That is the reason you hired them. Besides, if you are getting sick you should try and just rest. I can go past a drug store and pick something up for you on my way home?” Alex was concerned, maybe I was getting sick.

“Firstly, we don’t call them drug stores here. Telling someone you need to go get some “drugs” will be the quickest way to getting yourself arrested. It’s a pharmacy or a chemist and I don’t have any symptoms other than fatigue. Just have a good night and when you get home I want you naked in my bed.”

Alex laughed, “Anything you want Baby.”

He was interrupted by DarNell’s voice in the background – “Alex, band is on in twenty.”

“Lexi, I need to go but if you need anything you can call me on this number ok? DarNell will have his phone on the entire time.”

“Say hi to DarNell and Jackson. Love you.”

“Love you too Baby, see you soon.”

I felt a twinge of guilt about not being completely honest with Alex about my plans for the evening. It wasn’t a lie, just an omission. After all I had no intention of leaving the apartment and right after the crazy bitch left my only plans were for having a shower and climbing into bed. Knowing Marcy was in town would have just pissed Alex off and probably meant he would have come home and there was no point both of us having a shitful evening. I wasn’t going to give her that. Maybe that had been her plan? Expecting me to tell Alex so he could be here to confront her and she would get her chance to try and manipulate him again?

I rummaged through my kitchen cabinets for something to eat, finding nothing but a tube of Pringles. Ughhhh... maybe I’d call DarNell later and tell him to pick me up a late night snack on their way home.

There was a harsh knock at the front door... huh- Marcy was early. Maybe she had decided to get here before I came to my senses and call the whole thing off. As much as I wanted to do that, I was not about to back away from a confrontation. I didn’t start this but I was sure as hell going to finish it. Marcy had no idea who she was dealing with. I’ve had “Marcys” throughout my whole life, underestimating me, not knowing the fight that bubbled underneath.

I strode to the door, tossing my phone onto the couch on my way. I paused before opening the door, reminding myself to play it smart. My inner monologue gave me my final pep talk;  “She wants you to lose control, she is baiting you. Don’t lose control. Don’t allow her to dictate your reaction. You are strong.” As I opened the door, an eerie calm washed through me. I was ready.

“Hello Lexi.” His voice sent shivers down my spine. His face had been weathered by time but his eyes were still same, so dark they were almost black. I had looked into those eyes so many times and now as he stood before me, I saw an endless pit of evil.

“What are you doing here?” I sneered, my arm protectively covering the doorway.

“Lex.... is that way to greet an old friend?” He smirked, “We used to be so close.” He reached forward with his hand to touch my face and I slapped it away.

I straightened my body. I wouldn’t allow him to intimidate me; those days were over. “You are not my friend, you never were. You used me, controlled me. But that ended a long time ago and I am not the same naive girl you met who was desperate for your attention. So I don’t know what you are hoping to prove here other than you are the same sorry excuse for a man you were then. But now if you don’t mind, I’m expecting someone.”

His eyes darkened as the corner of his mouth turned up in amusement, “Lexi, I didn’t think you had it in you. You have certainly blossomed. This is going to be so much more fun than I had anticipated.”

The door flew open with a crack as he forced himself into the apartment, the startling movement throwing me off balance as I stumbled back onto the floor.

“Get out.” I hissed as I got back on my feet. “Or I’ll call the police!” I glanced at Alex’s phone sitting on the table, just slightly out of my reach.

He slammed the door shut behind him. “We won’t be interrupted, don’t worry little pet. How do you think I knew how to find you? Seems like someone believed you and I should have a reunion and I’m inclined to agree with her, even if she is a pretentious bitch.” He moved around me, stalking me.

Marcy? Marcy had orchestrated this? How? Why? My mind jumbled with the possible scenarios that could have led to this point. Sure, she had a strong dislike for me, possibly even hate and the feeling was mutual but what did she hope to gain from this? Alex? How would this bring him closer to her? The darkness in his eyes was so much more sinister than I had remembered. There was no light in them, as if any humanity had been extinguished long ago

“I’m not afraid of you and you will leave.” I moved closer to the coffee table in an effort to reach the phone. My body was purposeful and alert as I increased the speed in my stride. I would not cower, but his soulless eyes were making me increasingly uneasy.

He lunged, snatching the phone from the table, his body colliding with mine as I too tried to dive for it. His dark eyes glistened as he held the phone in his hand, taunting me. “You won’t be needing this.” He threw it against the wall and it shattered.

“I said, GET OUT!” I screamed as I pushed his body away. He was covered in the stench of whiskey and sweat, his close proximity was making my skin crawl. He revolted me and I could see he was unstable.

A smile crept on his mouth, he was enjoying this. “My, My. Feisty.” He grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled me down violently. The sheer force sent me crashing downward, my head catching the corner on the coffee table as I crumbled. Pain ripped through me as I felt a warm tingling spread across my forehead. My hand reached up and felt the moisture, as I smelt the rustiness of my blood.

“What do you want?” I leered, my head throbbing in agony as a small trail of blood trickled down my face. I stumbled backward, my hands protectively reaching out in front of my body as I tried to gain the balance to stand. He had me at a disadvantage and I needed to get back up.

“What we all want Lexi. An end to war, solving the world hunger problems, a cure for cancer...” He laughed. His heavy body immobilized me, he grabbed at my protesting legs and pinned me down onto the carpet “ ...and to fuck you again.”

“You are more delusional than I thought if you think I would ever even touch you, let alone fuck you!” The thought repulsed me. There must have been a time when he wasn’t so vile, where I saw something redeeming in him but now there was nothing... nothing but hate.

His body weight disabled me as he smothered me, my chest heaved with exertion as I pushed against him. He breathed into my face as his hand travelled up my leg. “You too good for me now? Now that you have your moneybags husband? Tell me does he know what a cheap slut he married?”

“Fuck YOU!” I bucked, trying to kick him off. My hands were immobile, twisted underneath his monstrous frame, so I tried to use my legs for leverage. I hoped I could get a good kick or two in, possibly having one hit him in the balls. I would not give in without a fight. He was physically stronger than me, there was no denying that, so I wouldn’t be able to get out of this based on strength, I would have to be smarter.

“Oh I intend to. I intend to fuck you the way you deserved to be fucked, like the worthless whore you are.” He sneered. My legs continued to struggle wildly as I managed to land a swift kick in his shin. He winced in pain, his teeth grinding in agitation.  He punched me across the face, his fist landing square across my cheek. I screamed as my head bounced off the floor.

I struggled to stay awake as an overwhelming need to sleep washed over me. The excruciating pain from my head was the only thing keeping me conscious. As my body went limp, his weight lifted off me and for a moment I felt relief. I focused on moving, trying to use the opportunity of my new found freedom as he stood over me.  His foot swung back and sent the wind gushing out of me as it made contact with my stomach. His jaw tensed as he drew back and repeated the action, this time finding his mark on my ribs. I groaned in pain as I rolled onto my side, desperate to move out of his path.  My limbs refused to cooperate as I begged them to spring into action. FIGHT BACK my brain screamed, yet my body stayed lifeless.

His face hovered over mine, his dark evil eyes excited as he grabbed my legs and dragged me onto the couch. I could feel how turned on he was, as his erection pressed against me through his clothes. He was excited. His hands were all over me as he positioned me flat onto my back, my body only able to muster up a squirm in protest. My head felt so heavy, I could barely lift it and my vision had blurred to be almost non-existent.

“Mmmmmmm you always were such a wild cat in the sack, Lexi,” he breathed into my mouth. His hands pressed hard into my upper thighs in attempt to pry them apart. I struggled against the pain as I resisted, I could feel them bruising under his fingers but I wouldn’t give in.

My fingernails dug into the top of his hands. “You won’t get away with this.” My voice was strange, distant like it was coming out of someone else’s mouth. “You can’t just rape me and think you will walk away.”

The word hung in the air between us. He didn’t have my permission and regardless of our history that is exactly what this was.

I thought for a second I saw a change in his eyes, like maybe I had gotten through to him. What he had done in the past, while horrendous, had not been a crime. If he did this now, there would be no coming back. He couldn’t run forever. He released my thighs and my hands fell to my side, my body still held in place by his.

I felt the cold, smooth surface of my iPhone buried beneath the cushion, it had slid there during our struggle. I allowed my fingertips to touch it, bringing it closer, carefully keeping my movements small as not to alert him. He was looking at me intently and was not paying attention to my hands. I could see the faint glow of the screen in my peripheral vision, hiding safely behind the fabric of the cushion. I didn’t dare move my eyes from his, trying to keep him engaged. I swiped my finger gently along the screen and solely by touch moved to where the phone icon was. I saw the subtle transition in the light indicating the screen had changed. I moved my finger to the bottom of the phone and estimated where the number keys where. Everyone was always giving me shit about how I was constantly on my phone but consequently the keypad had been seared into my brain. I thanked my phone obsessed self as I hovered where I thought the zero would be and hit it three times successively and then pressed call.

I didn’t know if the call connected to the 000 emergency operator or if we could even be heard but I knew I had to keep him talking, distracted. My face burned with pain as I tried to speak, “Walk away. What happened in the past... I forgive you. Don’t do this now.”

“You forgive me?” He asked almost incredulously, “Do you think I give a fuck about your forgiveness you dumb bitch?!”

Keep him talking Lexi, keep looking him in the eye. “You walked away remember, you didn’t want me anymore. Why come back now?” I strained as my head throbbed, my brain scrambled from fear and pain.

“Because I can. I saw you on TV, your smug smiling face... thinking you were something special. I came back to reclaim what is mine. Look at you, giving hope to all the other dumb groupie sluts who think they might have a chance. Do you really think this will last? Being with him?” His menacing smile returned as he tried to chip away at me, using emotion as he had always done.

“Alex loves me, he knows about my past and he doesn’t care. He won’t leave me.” A tear rolled down my cheek as he put his hand around my throat.

“I understand why your parents didn’t love you, Lexi. You really are a disappointment. In time, your piece of shit husband will find out too, what a worthless little cunt you are.”

He tightened his hand as I struggled for breath, his other hand slid up my leg and under my skirt. “No!” I gasped as he grabbed at my panties, “NO!”

I tried to fight back but my attempts were futile. He removed his hand from my throat and grabbed my arms again. Pulling them up over my head, he slapped me across the face.  He then removed his belt from his jeans and used it to secure my hands, binding them above my head.

“I said I want to fuck you and that’s what I’m going to do. You don’t get a choice.” He sneered in my face, as he fisted my panties and tore them from my body.

Sleep... sleep... The world around me was going fuzzy. I wouldn’t close my eyes. If he was going to do this then he would have to look at me while he was doing it. Don’t go to sleep Lexi, don’t give in. My mind was fighting an internal war with my body, neither willing to co-operate, as I whimpered “No” over and over again.

His hands were back between my legs, I heard the noise of his zipper. Stay awake Lexi, stay awake. I felt him thrust and enter me.  Pain and pressure seized me as he pushed deeper. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction. My body shook as I felt an overwhelming urge to throw up. Stay awake Lexi, stay awake.

“Freeze - put your hands where we can see them.” A voice shouted in the distance. The voice pulled him off of me and the pressure was gone. I couldn’t fight it any longer. I had to close my eyes.