CHAPTER NINE
DECLAN
Carrying the sack of burgers and fries and trying to balance the tray with the drinks in it, I managed to get the door unlocked. I pushed it inward and stepped into the small, cramped motel room. It was no luxury suite – not like we could've afforded that anyway – but it was fine for what we needed. Besides, it was pretty much the only place we saw when we decided to pull over to get a little sleep.
“Honey, I'm home,” I called, laughing to myself at my joke.
There was no answer as I set the food I was carrying down on the small table and turned around. Jack was in his little crib when I walked over and looked down at him. He looked back up at me with wide, bright eyes, gurgling and cooing, something like a smile on his face.
“Hey, how are you doing little man?” I said and smiled.
I reached down and stroked his soft cheeks, relishing the feel of his warm skin. Standing back up, I couldn't take my eyes off of him. It was so strange to think that this baby was my baby. My son. Because of him, my whole world had changed. But, standing there looking down at him, I couldn't imagine him not being in my life. “Hey, Kara,” I called over my shoulder. “Food's here.”
When I got no response, I turned to look at the bathroom door and cocked my head, not quite processing what I was seeing. It was standing open just a crack and there was no light on inside. I walked over to the bathroom and pushed the door all the way open. It was empty, everything still in place just as it had been when we'd checked in – and no Kara. “What the fuck?”
I turned back to the room and irrationally looked at the bed. Like I wouldn't have seen her when I walked in if she were in it, but I felt compelled to look anyway. Not there. Next, I looked in the small closet, for some stupid reason like she was hiding in there ready to jump out at me. Not there either. She was nowhere to be found. Vanished. Like a puff of smoke on the breeze, Kara was just gone.
Jack let out a noise, so I picked him up and held him to my chest, bouncing him a little like I'd seen women do, as I paced around the hotel room. Having his small, warm body pressed to mine gave me a feeling of comfort. It helped clear my mind and focused my thoughts a little more. Thoughts, at the moment, that were consumed by the fact that Kara had apparently disappeared without a trace.
I looked at the cellphone sitting on the dresser, and quickly dismissed the idea of trying to call her. She didn't have a phone on her. The knots in my stomach constricted painfully as I ran through a dozen scenarios in my mind, each one raising a hundred thousand questions.
Had Killian gotten ahold of her somehow? Had he snuck into the room and taken her? No, if they'd found us and broken into our room, at the very least, I would have gotten a beating. If they'd found us, more than likely, the maids would be cleaning up a corpse later today. If Killian had managed to track us down to middle of nowhere Missouri, they more than likely would have waited for me to give me what I deserved for running, rather than taking Kara and vanishing like ghosts. They would have wanted to make an example out of me. The most certainly wouldn't have left Jack here either.
I could only come to one other conclusion. “She left us,” I said, holding Jack a little tighter. “Up and left us without so much as a goodbye.”
I paced around the room, my baby in my arms, feeling a complex tangle of emotions swirling around inside of me. Anger and hurt at being abandoned being the most prominent. I couldn't believe that Kara would have just bailed on us like that. After everything we'd been through and the connection I thought we were developing between us, I didn't want to believe she'd just up and walk out like that. Not like her father had done to her. I didn't want to believe she'd do that to us. I didn't want to believe she'd do that to Jack.
But, what other answer could there be?
Something about this didn't feel right. I just couldn't put my finger on what it was. Carrying Jack close to my chest, I stepped outside the room and looked up and down the hallway. A maid's service cart stood next to a room down the hall, so I walked toward it. She was just coming out of the room when I drew near and gave me a warm, friendly smile.
“Hi,” I said. “Sorry to disturb you, but I'm staying down in room 248, and – ”
“Your baby is precious,” she said. “An angel.”
“Thank you,” I replied. “Listen, I – ”
“Your wife is beautiful as well,” she said. “And always so friendly.”
“Actually, I was hoping you'd seen her today?”
The woman nods. “I did,” she said. “Just a couple of hours ago, actually.”
My heart skipped a beat. “A couple of hours ago?”
She nodded. “I only saw her from a distance down in the parking lot,” she says. “I thought she was with you, actually. I saw the man with the red hair and just assumed – ”
I felt my stomach plummet down into my shoes at the same time my heart jumped into my throat. A red-haired man. That could only mean one thing. Shit. My body hummed with an energy born of fear for Kara. If Killian had her – I didn't even want to think about it.
“Oh, right,” I say, trying to play it off. “My brother must have picked her up without telling me. Got our wires crossed. I'll just give him a call. Thanks, I appreciate your help.”
I turned and practically sprinted back to the room. Stepping inside, I closed the door and threw the locks before settling Jack back down in his crib. He fussed and squirmed a little bit, but soon quieted down and went back to sucking on his fingers.
I paced the room, running a hand through my hair, my stress level rising with each step I took. I had no way of knowing at that point if Kara was even still alive. I could only hope Killian had come for her himself, rather than sending Rory to get her. Killian was a prick, but he was a businessman. If there was money to be had, Kara would be okay. For now. If Rory had gotten hold of her, all bets were off. Rory was a wild card and could be unpredictable. Even if Killian had ordered him to not touch her, I couldn't be sure he'd actually obey, regardless of how scared of our brother he was.
“Son of a bitch,” I muttered. “How the fuck did they find us?”
I racked my brain for a moment, trying to figure it out. Ultimately though, it didn't matter. They'd found us. Somehow, someway, they'd found us out in the middle of nowhere Missouri. We'd been so careful, I just didn't understand it.
Looking at the phone on the dresser, I knew that I could stand there asking questions of myself all day or I could start getting answers. With a long sigh, I picked up the phone and punched in Killian's number. My stomach roiling and my heart thumping hard, I pressed the phone to my ear and waited for the call to go through. I didn't have to wait long.
“Brother,” Killian's voice was annoyingly bright and chipper. “We've been waiting for your call. How are you today?”
“Where is she?”
“What, no greeting for your big brother? Just right down to business?”
“Stop fucking with me, Killian,” I growled. “Where is Kara?”
“Oh, she's here,” he says. “Not happy about it, but she's here.”
“What the fuck do you want?”
“The same thing I've always wanted – the money I'm owed.”
I resumed pacing as I spoke. “She doesn't owe you shit, man,” I said. “She doesn't have any money. Your beef is with her father, and – ”
“That's true. But, the only way I'm going to settle my beef with her father is through her,” he says. “It's not ideal, but few things in this life are.”
“Let her go.”
“Yeah, I'm not going to do that, Declan,” he said. “In fact, I've got a new beef because of this whole melodrama. Can you guess who that beef might be with?”
“Fuck you.”
“Right on the money,” he said, his voice turning low and cold. “You certainly gave Meredith a good scare – not to mention my children – and I don't appreciate that. Not in the least. You and I have some issues to settle.”
“Fine,” I said. “I'll trade myself for Kara. When I get there, you let her go.”
“That's not the way this works,” he said and sighed. “No wonder you aren't running the family business. You're just not very good at it.”
“Then you're not giving me a lot of incentive to show up there, are you?”
He laughed softly. “I have the only incentive you need, brother,” he said. “I know you care for the girl. I know you care for her a lot, which, is surprising since the only person you've ever cared about before is yourself.”
I looked over at Jack and felt my heart swell. Killian wasn't wrong in that assessment. I knew I'd been selfish throughout my life. I was living my life for me and fuck anybody who thought to tell me otherwise had always been my attitude. But, when Jack – and then Kara – came into my life, that all started to change. Suddenly, I was thinking about other people and how what I did impacted their lives. Suddenly, I was thinking about the future. Things that were inconceivable to me just three weeks ago.
“What the fuck do you want, Killian?”
“I want your ass back here, brother,” he said. “We need to have a discussion. And I want you to bring Jack. Meredith has grown quite attached to him and is really upset that you took him from her.”
“He's my son.”
“He'll be better off raised by my wife,” he says. “In a good, loving home with parents who are around and can provide for him.”
“You talk like you're just going to kill me when I show up,” I say.
“I would prefer things not go that way,” he replied. “But, nothing is off the table at this point. Trust me when I say though, that my preference is to bring you back into the family. To have you be a productive member of the business. I know father would have wanted that.”
“Like I give a fuck what the old man would have wanted.”
He laughed softly. “Yes, you've made that quite clear throughout your life,” he said. “Get back here, Declan. Come to the pub and we'll talk when you get here. We'll be waiting for you.”
Killian clicked off the line and I was left staring at the phone. Jack cooed and burbled in his crib, completely oblivious to the drama unfolding around him. Completely oblivious to the fact that in a few hours, he could well be an orphan.
I turned and stared at myself in the mirror. Stared into a face that was drawn and eyes that were haunted. Going back to Chicago could very well be the end of me regardless of what Killian had just told me. I'd disappointed him, and he was going to make an example out of me in front of his men. I would be the lesson in the price they'd pay for disloyalty.
Walking over to the crib, I looked down at Jack. He stared at me with those eyes, so full of life. So full of trust. Reaching out, I let him wrap his little hand around my finger, listening to the happy little noises that came out of his mouth. My heart swelled with a love and a joy I'd never known before or thought myself capable of.
“I'm going to get us out of this, little man,” I said. “You, me, and Kara. We're all getting out of this shit and we're going to have a good life somewhere. I don't know how I'm going to pull it off, but I'm making that promise to you now. Daddy’s gonna fix this.”
Jack looked up at me and even though I knew he didn't understand a damn word I'd just said, I felt like I had to say it. As if speaking my promise out loud would make it come to life. I had no idea of what I was going to do or how I was going to do it, but I was bound and determined to first get Kara away from Killian, and then get her to Jack. If nothing else, the two of them could run and start a new life somewhere.
I would fulfill my vow at all costs – even at the cost of my own life.
~ooo000ooo~
“Thank you, Charlotte,” I said. “I can't even begin to tell you how much I appreciate this.”
She waved me off with a smile. “Don't think twice about it, hon,” she says. “After all you done for me over the years, it's the least I can do. I gotta say though, you're the last person I ever woulda figured would turn up on my doorstep with a baby.”
A rueful smile touched my lips. “Yeah, that makes two of us,” I said. “I'm the last person who should be thought of as father material.”
She shrugged. “I can tell you love this kid. It shows in your eyes, Declan,” she said. “That's half the battle right there – knowing you'd do anything for your child. That count for a lot.”
I gave her a grateful smile but couldn't meet her eyes. Charlotte was an old friend of mine who lived just outside Chicago. She knew my family history, knew what they were all about, and she was one of the few people I trusted in this world – and one of the fewer still I'd ever trust enough to leave Jack with. She took him from me and smiled wide at him.
“Well, ain't you just the cutest thing ever?” she cooed at him.
Jack looked back at her with that smile on his face and made a noise when she lightly pinched his cheeks. Charlotte had kids of her own, but they lived with their father most of the time because he lived in a better school district and she wanted the best for them. She was a good mom and her relationship with her kids was a good one, which was just another reason I trusted her with Jack. “I really don't know how this is going to go,” I said. “This could get sideways on me really fast.”
She nodded. I'd filled Charlotte in on everything and had let her in on the half-assed plan I'd put together on my way back to Chicago. She knew what I was walking into and what the stakes were. She knew there was a chance I might not be coming back. Yet, despite knowing all that, she agreed to take Jack for me.
“If there's anybody I'd bet on coming out of that damn viper's nest, it'd be you, Declan,” she said.
“I hope you're right,” I said and glanced at my watch. “I should probably get going.”
She gave me a warm smile and handed Jack back to me. I took him in my arms and kissed his forehead. I didn't know how this was all going to play out or if I was ever going to see my son again. I was going to fight like hell to get back to him, but the truth of the matter was, I didn't know if I'd be able to keep my promise to him. My brother was a ruthless son of a bitch and I had no idea what I was walking into.
All I knew was that until I put an end to this, none of us would ever be safe. Ever. We'd have to live our lives on the run, always looking over our shoulders. We'd have to spend our lives waiting for the other shoe to drop and that was no way to live. I wasn't going to live that way and I damn sure wasn't going to force my son to live that way. If I didn't make it back, at least I knew he was going to be in good hands with Charlotte. Hidden. Safe. Nobody would ever find him. More than that though, I knew he would have a good life and be raised well.
“I'll see you soon, little man,” I said, hoping I sounded more convinced of it than I felt.
I handed Jack back to Charlotte and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She took hold of my hand and gave it a tight squeeze, the look in her eye earnest.
“You will get through this and come back for your boy,” she said. “I know you will.”
I squeezed her hand in return and gave her what I hoped was a reassuring smile. “I'll see you soon, Charlotte,” I said. “And thank you. For everything.”
She nodded. “Go handle your business.”
“On my way.”
~ooo000ooo~
After being patted down by his men, they led me to the basement of the pub where Killian was waiting for me. There were boxes and other supplies needed to run the bar stacked all around, but my eyes immediately fell upon Kara, who was tied to a chair, her eyes burning with hatred. When she saw me though, her face softened, and I could see her fighting back the tears. She wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of seeing her cry. That's my girl. A core of steel.
In that moment, I wished I felt half as strong as she looked. My plan was hopefully coming together, but there were so many variables and moving parts, I wasn't sure if it was going to come to fruition the way I'd hoped. Inevitability something always got fucked up and that old saying about man planning and the gods laughing, flashed through my mind. But, I'd had no other choice. I'd had to roll the dice and now, I was stuck hoping for the best possible outcome.
“The prodigal son returns,” Killian said with a chuckle. “Welcome home, brother.”
I looked around the room. Including the one who'd escorted me down, he had four big goons standing around, all of them eyeballing me with clear hostility in their eyes. Rory was sitting on a table near the corner just behind Killian, a wide, shit-eating grin on his face.
“Kara, you okay?” I asked.
She nodded. “I'm fine.”
Rory chuckled to himself, a dry, grating sound that made me want to punch him. Not that I didn't have a shortage of reasons for wanting to punch him.
“Something funny, Rory?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Nothin' really,” he said. “I was just thinkin' I can see why you got yourself so wrapped up in this bitch. She's fine.”
I took a step forward, my fists clenching at my sides. Killian's goons all stepped up, all of them glaring at me, daring me to do something. Killian looked at me for a long moment and nodded. He turned and moved so fast, it took me a minute to process what had just happened. The crack of Killian's hand meeting Rory's face was loud and echoed around the concrete room. Rory tumbled off the table, a thin rivulet of blood running from the corner of his mouth. He scrambled to his feet, holding his hand over his bloody mouth, glaring balefully at Killian.
Killian stepped forward, looming over Rory. “I told you that you were not to lay a single hand on her,” he said. “Were my instructions in any way unclear?”
Rory looked away and shook his head but said nothing.
“We'll discuss this further later, Rory,” he said. “Right now, there is business at hand. Leave us.”
Rory looked at Killian like he'd slapped him again. Killian just glared at him, and Rory backed down, of course. His head hanging low, obviously pissed about being excluded, he marched out of the room, casting dark, hateful looks at me the whole way. He slammed the door dramatically behind him, leaving me trapped in a room with Killian and his men.
Killian turned to Kara, giving her a small smile. “I apologize for the coarse treatment my brother inflicted upon you,” he said. “I was very clear that – ”
“Fuck off,” Kara snapped at him.
A dark look crossed Killian's face and there was a brief moment where I thought he might hit her. I didn't know what I'd do if I did, but I wouldn't let it stand. Thankfully though, he quickly composed himself and turned away from her, facing me.
“Where is Jack?” he asked. “I recall specifically telling you to bring the child.”
“Yeah, I changed that plan,” I said.
“That wasn't smart, Declan.”
I shrugged. “You spent most of my life telling me I was an idiot,” I said. “Guess I just proved you right.”
A smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Declan, you're making it very hard for me to trust you,” he said. “And if I can't trust you, I can't have you be a part of this family.”
“That's fine,” I said. “Just give me Kara and we'll leave you be. I didn't want to be part of this family anyway.”
“But, you are part of this family,” he said. “You can't simply just walk away from it like that.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said softly. “I know that now.”
I looked into Kara's eyes and saw the confusion in them. I wanted to tell her it was all going to work out and that we'd be fine, but of course, I couldn't. I couldn't ease her mind by letting her in on my plan. Hell, I had no idea if my plan was even going to work.
I gave her my most earnest look, begging her with my eyes to trust me.
“So, since you have hidden your son from me,” Killian said. “And you're standing before me empty handed, what is it you want?”
I let out a long breath. “You let Kara go,” I said, “and I'll come work for you. No conditions, no strings attached. I'll work for you, doing whatever you need done. And in exchange for my work, you let her go, and you clear her father's debt. In other words, you get the fuck out of her life and leave her alone. Forever.”
“Declan, no – ”
“It's okay, Kara,” I said. “I got this.”
Killian clasped his hands behind his back and paced around the room, looking from me to Kara and back again, a bemused little smirk on his face.
“That ship has already sailed, brother,” he said.
I cocked my head and looked at him. “What do you mean?”
Killian glanced at his watch. “Well, it seems that Kara's debt – ”
“Her father's debt,” I corrected him.
“Of course,” he replied. “It seems her father's debt is being squared up. She'll be free to go soon. So, what else do you have for me?”
“Squared up?” I asked and looked over at Kara, who shrugged. “By who?”
“You'll see in a few minutes,” he replied. “Anyway, I was actually thinking that these issues that exist between us can be settled by you working for me, just as you said – with no conditions or strings attached.”
“And what do I get out of that deal?” I asked.
“Well, you get to live for one thing,” he replied. “That, in and of itself, should be worth quite a lot. Don't you think? But, just to sweeten the pot, you will also stand to make a lot of money. You will be able to provide very well for your son – and Kara if she chooses to be with you.”
“Yeah, and all I have to do is kill people for you.”
He shrugged. “That's a rarity, brother,” he said. “But yes, that is an unfortunate reality of our business from time to time.”
Kara was shaking her head, her eyes fixed on mine. “Don't do it, Declan,” she said. “It's not worth it. You're better than that. Better than them.”
Killian turned to her, a cruel little smile on his lips. “The other option is death,” he says. “My brother disrespected me. Deeply. I don't take that lightly. Most men, I would have killed already had they disrespected me the way my brother has. But, I'm giving him a chance to redeem himself. To set this right.”
Kara wasn’t listening to him though. She wasn't even looking at him. Her eyes remained fixed on me. They shimmered with tears and she was pleading with me to not do what Killian wanted me to do.
I knew if I gave in to him, started doing the work he wanted me to do, I would lose myself. If I became Killian's hitman, my soul would forever be damaged. Sullied. I knew I wouldn't be the same man ever again.
The door to the room opened and I turned, looking at the newcomers, confusion crossing my face. There were four large, burly men wearing dirty jeans and leather biker kuttes. They all had scraggly hair and had a hard edge about them. These were men for whom, violence was a way of life, you could tell. You could see it in their eyes and in the way they carried themselves.
I turned and saw Kara's eyes widen. They were almost cartoonish, they were so big. Her lips trembled, and tears rolled down her smooth cheeks.
“Y – you came for me,” she said softly. “You came for me, Dad.”
He looked at her, giving her a small smile. “Of course I did,” he said. “You're my daughter.”
“Michael Boyer,” Killian said, a wide greasy smile on his face. “So good to see you. Though, I didn't expect you to bring your friends with you.”
The man stepped forward, a scowl on his face and murder in his eyes. The tension in the room ratcheted up a thousand-fold. All of these large men, all rough, all used to violence gathered in one room. Yeah, this was going to get ugly. I just knew it.
“You're holding my girl,” he snarled. “You threatened her.”
“Yes, because you owe me money,” Killian said. “Coarse, disagreeable measures that would not have needed to be taken had you simply paid your debts.”
“Yeah, well shit got fucked up,” he said. “What can I say?”
“Well, you can start by telling me that shit has been unfucked up,” Killian replied. “And that you have my money.”
I edged my way toward Kara, doing my best to move slowly and not draw attention to myself. While the two little armies – Irish mobsters and bikers – were squared off, each trying to out-macho the other and not paying attention to me, I had a small window. One I intended to exploit.
Getting behind the chair she was tied to, I motioned for her to remain silent as I knelt down and went to work on the knots holding Kara's hands bound behind her.
“I don't have your money,” Kara's father said.
“Well, that's most unfortunate,” Killian replied. “For you and for your daughter. See, I don't take kindly to people who default on their obligations.”
“Yeah, you can go fuck yourself and your obligations,” Boyer snapped. “I'm taking my daughter the fuck out of here and there ain't shit you can do about it.”
“Oh no?” Killian asked, his tone growing colder and harder.
I knew that tone of voice and knew things were about to come to a head. Shit was about to go sideways and get nasty. I couldn't get the knots undone – not in the few seconds I had before chaos erupted, so I slipped the knife out of my pocket and started to saw through the ropes.
“No,” Boyer snapped back. “I don't give in to two-bit punks like you. You and your fuckin' goon squad here don't scare me and my boys.”
“That's a shame, because we should,” Killian said. “I don't know why, but I thought you were smarter than that, Michael.”
My knife finally sliced through the last of the ropes and Kara was free. She slipped out of the chair and wrapped her arms around me.
“We need to get out of here,” I whispered. “Help is coming, but I don't know if they'll get here in time because shit is about to get really bad.”
“Help is coming? Who?” she asked. “What did you do, Declan?”
I looked at the two sides facing off and heard a low groan escape me as I watched all of them draw guns. They all stared hard at each other, no man wanting to die, but every man willing to pull the trigger.
“You and your men should probably leave now,” Killian said, his voice low and menacing. “Before anybody gets hurt.”
Nobody moved a muscle. I didn't even think anybody had blinked since the guns were drawn. Everybody was waiting for somebody else to make the first move. I figured that every man in that room was smart enough to know that once the bullets started flying, the chances of any of them getting out alive was pretty minimal.
“Doesn't have to go down this way,” Boyer said. “Just give me what's mine and we call it even.”
“But, we're not even,” he said. “There would still be the debt you have incurred.”
“I'll get it to you,” Boyer said, his gun pointed straight at Killian's face. “I pay my debts. Just give me some time.”
“You've had more than enough time,” Killian snapped. “I'm tired of waiting.”
“Well, get used to is son,” he said. “Life is all about waiting.”
There was a long moment of strained silence. The tension was so thick I could feel it pressing down on me. The two sides hadn't moved a muscle. It looked like a goddamn western. Then, all hell broke loose.
A dozen men, at least, wearing black masks, helmets, and black body armor, carrying assault rifles stormed into the room. The air was filled with shouting voices, most of them screaming “Police! Get down on the floor!”
I pulled Kara closer to me and backed us up against a wall, waiting for the inevitable. Shots rang out, thunderous in such a small, confined space. Kara screamed and buried her face in my chest, her hands clamped over her ears. I felt her trembling, so I pulled her to me even tighter.
The air was filled with smoke and the smell of cordite. The shooting lasted just a couple of seconds, but it felt like an eternity. Through the haze of the smoke, I saw bodies on the floor – and hoped one of them was Killian.
When the smoke finally lifted, I saw that one of Michael's men and two of Killian's men were dead on the floor, pools of blood spreading out from beneath them, their eyes open wide, fixed, and unfocused, seeing nothing but the great beyond at that point. Everybody else who'd been holding a gun in that room was down on their knees, their hands on top of their heads – including Michael and Killian.
A tall, wide black man with a Kevlar vest over a button-down shirt and tie stepped over to us. He smiled down at me. I looked up at him and smirked.
“Shit, took you long enough,” I said. “If you'd waited any longer, we all could've been killed.” said.
“We like to make a dramatic entrance. Draw out the suspense,” the man laughed. “What can I say?
Kara looked at me, confusion painting her face.
“This is Detective Dan Burroughs,” I said. “An old friend of mine.”
“An old friend?”
I nodded. “We played ball together back in high school,” I said. “And for some reason, he decided to become a cop.”
“Good thing I did,” Burroughs laughed. “Otherwise, you would've been in a whole world of shit today.”
“That's true,” I said. “And I appreciate you pulling my ass out of the fire.
Burroughs nodded and sighed. “I hate to do it, man.”
I gave him a rueful grin. “I get it. Don't worry about it. It's the deal I made.”
Kara looked at me, panic flashing through her eyes. “Deal? What deal, Declan?” she asked, her voice colored with worry. “What are you talking about?”
I took her hand and held it tight. “On my way back here, I called Dan,” I said. “Told him everything – including the fact that I was an accessory to your kidnapping. Told him about this meet. Didn't know your dad was going to be here though. I'm sorry about that.”
She shook her head and cast a look over at her father, who was being cuffed as we spoke. He looked at her, giving her a tight smile. I took Kara's face in my hands and kissed her, hoping she felt every ounce of love and passion I felt for her. Slowly, I pulled away and got to my feet. I held my hands out and Dan put a pair of cuffs on me.
“It's all going to be okay, Kara,” I said. “I promise. Now, go see your father. He did come all the way down here to save you, after all.”
She was torn. Conflicted. I could see it in her eyes. He'd abandoned her. But, he'd also showed up to save her, and put his own life on the line to do it. She looked at me again, tears streaming down her cheeks unchecked.
“I'm okay,” I said. “This is all going to work out. Don't you worry. Now, go see to your father.”
I let Dan lead me out of the room and out of the pub, to the waiting squad car that would take me down to the jail. I'd rolled the dice by agreeing to work with the cops on this. I'd held up my end of the bargain, now I was left to hope they'd hold up their end.
~ooo000ooo~
“Nine months?” I asked. “Seriously?”
My attorney, a public defender who looked like a kid fresh out of law school shrugged. “That's what the DA is offering,” he said. “It's a gift, Declan. You should take it.”
I leaned back in my seat and took Kara's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. I knew I was going to have to do a little time. After all, I'd been an accessory to kidnapping. I just hadn't thought it would be nine months.
“I helped them roll up a major organized crime family,” I said. “I thought that would have warranted a little consideration.”
“That is consideration,” he said. “Accessory to kidnapping will usually land you in jail for five or more years.”
“But, I'm not pressing charges against him,” Kara said.
“Doesn't matter,” the lawyer responded. “The DA can make a case with or without your cooperation.”
I looked at Kara. “We knew I was going to have to do some time.”
A tear raced down her cheek as she looked at me. I reached out and gently wiped it away.
“You did nothing wrong,” she said. “You did the right thing. And this is how they repay you?”
I shrugged. “I did do something wrong though, baby,” I said. “I should have called the cops from the jump. I never should have played a part in keeping you hostage.”
“You didn't,” she cried as more tears rolled down her cheeks.
“I did,” I said. “And now, I have to pay the piper. I have to accept responsibility for my own actions. It's something I want Jack to learn as he grows up. It's important he learn that.”
She nodded. “He will,” she said.
“Charlotte said she can take care of him while I'm away – ”
Kara shook her head quickly. “No,” she said. “Jack will stay with me. I'll care for him.”
Hearing the resolve in her voice moved me. She really did care about him – and I knew she really did care about me. I was excited for our future together – it was just going to have to wait a little bit.
“If you accept this deal,” the lawyer said, “with good behavior, you're likely going to get out in three or four months.”
I nodded. “I can do that standing on my head.”
Kara smirked. “Yeah, well, don't,” she said. “Don't do anything that will draw attention to yourself in there. Just keep your head down and your eye on the calendar. And then get your ass back to me.”
“I'll do that,” I say.
We stared into each other's eyes for a long moment, so much emotion passing between us without either of us having to say a single word. It was nice being so comfortable with somebody. Being so open and free with them. It's not like anything I've ever had before, but it was something I was rapidly growing addicted to.
I lived my life never knowing what tomorrow was going to bring. I was the ultimate, “live in the moment,” kind of guy. But, when I looked into Kara's eyes, although I still wanted to live in the moment, I also wanted to plan for a future. One that included Kara and Jack.
“You had better be on your absolute best behavior. I want you home in three months. I want you home in time to see... ”
Her voice trailed off and a look of fear passed through her eyes. When she looked at me again, her expression was uncertain. She was afraid of something, but what?
“What is it, Kara?” I asked.
She let out a long breath. “I want you home in time to see the birth of your second child.”
I looked at her wide-eyed, utterly dumbfounded. Had I just heard her correctly? Was this some sort of a joke?
“Second child?” I asked.
She nodded, but it was hesitant. Scared. “Yes,” she said softly. “I'm pregnant.”
My mind and heart were caught up in a swirling torrent of conflicting emotions. Fear. Terror. Joy. Elation.
“Are you serious?” I asked softly.
She nodded. “Yeah,” she said. “I found out literally an hour before Rory showed up and took me.”
I ran a hand through my hair and blew out a long breath, trying to get ahold of my thoughts and emotions – and wasn't having much luck. I was scared about the idea of having a second child, knowing I didn't even know how I was going to take care of the first. At the same time though, the idea of having a child with Kara thrilled me more than I could even express in that moment.
“Well, I guess congratulations are in order,” the lawyer said. “As awkward as it might be right now.”
I turned to him. “It's not awkward,” I said. “I made a choice and I'm happy to see this through. Plus, it just gives me all the more incentive to keep my nose clean inside, and better my life once I get out. I've got a good woman and now, two kids, to look after.”
“So, can I tell the DA you'll take the deal?” he asked.
I nod. “Yeah,” I said. “You can.”
“Great,” he said.
He walked out of the room, no doubt, happy to have a case off his pile. Kara and I sat there, staring into each other's eyes. Though she looked happy, I could still see the hesitance.
“I was afraid to tell you,” she admitted. “I wasn't sure how you were going to react. I mean, we both said it wasn't a good time to – ”
“And I meant it at the time,” I replied. “But, we're past that situation now. Killian and Rory are headed to prison for a long time. Your dad is going to do a little time, but he's come back to you as well. Once I get out, we are going to have a fresh start. A whole new chapter of our lives to spend. Together. The idea of spending my life with you and raising a family – I can't think of anything better than that.”
“Together,” she said. “I like the sound of that.”
“You better,” I said. “Because we're going to raise our family together. We're going to raise good kids. Honest kids. We're going to give them a good life.”
“I know,” she said as another tear – this one, I assumed, of joy – ran down her face. “I know that.”
I wasn't sure how I was going to give them a better life. But, I was going to have a few months to figure it all out.
“It's all going to be okay,” I said and surprised myself by actually meaning it.
“I believe you,” she said. “I actually believe you.”
I nodded. “Good,” I said. “Because it's true.”
She leaned forward and kissed me, letting me feel all of the emotion she carried inside of her for me. It was going to have to sustain me for a few months. But, I vowed that once I got out, I would never be apart from her or our kids again.
“I love you,” I said.
“I love you too.”