Chapter 27 - Izzy

I’m incredibly nervous. We drive up to a nice house with tall trees lining the street. I still can’t quite believe that Dave asked me to go to a dinner party with him and his closest friends. I almost said no, but Jess was sleeping over with a friend and I didn’t want to sit at home alone all night. Now we’re here, and I re-adjust my dress as Dave opens the car door for me.

“You look beautiful,” he says as he kisses the side of my face. His hand finds the small of my back and we start walking towards the front door. He’s being so… affectionate. I don’t quite know what to think except I love the way it feels to be with him. We still haven’t talked about anything, about the past or the accident or what’s going to happen between us once this marriage is over. We’ve just been getting to know each other again.

My heart is pounding against my ribcage as I think about meeting his best friends. How will he introduce me? Surely they don’t know we’re married??

Dave rings the doorbell and it’s only a couple moments before we hear footsteps rushing towards the door. It flies open and I’m shocked to see a little girl in front of me, just about Jess’s age or maybe a little bit older.

“Davey!” She says as she flies into his arms for a hug.

“Hi, Gracie,” Dave laughs. “How have you been, kiddo?”

“I’m not a kiddo, I’m a young lady,” she says, sticking her chin out. I laugh.

“That’s right!” I say to her. She sticks her hand out towards me and I shake it solemnly. “I’m Isabelle but you can call me Izzy.”

“Nice to meet you, Izzy. I’m Grace but you can call me Gracie.” She looks from me to Dave. “So is this your girlfriend?” Her voice is dripping with pre-teen sass. I look at Dave who reaches down to ruffle Gracie’s hair.

“Something like that,” he says. I guess that’s as much of an explanation as I can expect.

I smile and turn to the adults that have materialised behind Gracie. Dave makes the introductions and I still don’t know if they know we’re married.

“Izzy, this is Emma and Elliot and their little brat, Gracie who you’ve met,” he starts.

“Hey!” Gracie says as she puts her little hands on her hips. Dave laughs and then turns to the two others.

“This is my oldest friend, Clay and his wife Valerie.”

“Val,” she corrects him with a smile. “Nice to meet you!”

“Come in, come in!” Emma says, ushering us towards the living room. She’s got bright red lipstick and a full head of curly hair. Her smile is infectious.

I glance over at Dave as he takes off his shoes. I probably should have asked him about our label, but we have a habit of not talking about important things until it gets us in awkward situations.

Within moments there’s a glass of wine in my hand and a platter of appetisers in front of me to choose from. I can’t help but smile. I feel at home already. I listen as Gracie tells us a story about her week at school and I smile. Her and Jess have the same zest for life, I can tell already. They’d love each other.

Dave is sitting next to me on the couch, sipping his beer and asking Gracie questions. I never knew he was such a natural with kids. It makes my heart swell to hear him laugh with Gracie. I just know that Jess would love him. She sticks her tongue out at him and he lunges towards her, attacking her with tickles until they’re both laughing on the floor.

“Alright, alright you two,” says Emma. “Let’s not get too excited before dinner.”

Both of them groan and reluctantly stop jostling. Dave sits down beside me, still laughing. He puts his hand on my leg and leans back, grabbing the beer he’d left on the side table. The warmth of his hand radiates through the thin fabric of my dress and I can’t help but feel more comfortable. It feels so natural to be here with him, to be talking to his friends. It feels good to be relaxed and to not worry about what he’s thinking or what he thinks of me and what he thinks of the past. We’re just here, together.

He gives me leg a squeeze and I look over to meet his eye. He gives me a wink and my face cracks into a smile.

I feel happy.

I feel carefree for the first time in years. My heart sings and I sit back in the couch in contentment. I want this feeling to last forever.

We eat dinner together with more wine and beers and laughter. My heart feels light as I get up to help clear the table, dropping the plates next to the sink where Emma and Valerie are washing and drying.

“You outdid yourself, Emma, that was so delicious,” I tell her.

“Oh, stop,” she says, blushing. “It was mostly Val anyways.” The two of them start laughing.

“You’re hopeless in the kitchen,” Val teases. Their friendship seems so easy and comfortable and my mind quickly jumps to Hannah but I push the thought away.

“Thank you for having me. I’ve been so busy with work and life that I don’t remember the last time I actually had an evening to myself with other adults.”

“I know how that is,” Valerie says dryly, raising her eyebrows in commiseration.

“Dave was saying you have a little sister?” Emma asks. Dave’s been talking to them about me? Did he tell them we’re married?? Surely they would have mentioned that by now.

“Yeah, she’s about Gracie’s age. My parents are gone so it’s been just her and me for a while. She means everything to me.”

“Kids have that effect on people,” Emma says with a laugh. “I was staunchly child-free until I met Elliot and Gracie. Now I couldn’t imagine my life any other way.”

I look at Valerie and Emma as they move in tandem to wash the dishes. They move as if they’re perfectly comfortable and used to each other.

“So you guys have known each other for a long time?”

“Since forever!” Emma says, looking over at Val. “Too long.” They laugh again. Val looks at me.

“Clay and Davey have been best friends since they were in medical school as well,” she explains. “He really cares about you. I can tell by the way he looks at you. How long have you guys been together?”

My cheeks flush. They think he likes me? It must be the wine that’s making his eyes look like that. I can’t believe that he’d be doing anything except tolerating me and trying to navigate this unusual situation. Just a week ago he told me he’d hated me for ten years.

“He’s a good guy,” I reply lamely. “I’ve known him for almost my whole life. I… I knew his sister.”

There’s a silence between the three of us as my heart beats faster. I wonder if they know he had a sister. Suddenly my mind is doing backflips and Im panicking. I shouldn’t have mentioned Hannah. The nervousness that disappeared when I walked in starts rising in me again.

“I’ll go get the last of the dishes,” I say, wanting to escape.

“Just sit down, Izzy, you’re a guest. Have some wine!” Emma says, flicking her head towards the half-full bottle of wine on the counter. She winks at me and her bright red lips curl into a smile. “Pour me a glass while you’re at it!”

I let myself relax, laughing with and nod. “Alright, twist my arm,” I say. My heartbeat goes back down to normal and I reach for the bottle of wine. I could see myself become friends with these women. I haven’t felt this comfortable with other people in years.

Emma asks me about work and we fall into an easy conversation. I tell them about Dave’s grandfather, about Jess, about being a nurse. They tell me about work and how they met their husbands. I wonder if I’ve been wrong to isolate myself all these years. I should have sought out friendships more and opened myself up to other people. I never imagined it could be this easy.

I hear Dave laughing in the other room and I remind myself not to get too comfortable. If Dave doesn’t want them to know our business arrangement, I shouldn’t be too open with them. I sigh and take a sip of wine. This is far more complicated than I thought it would be.