The moonlight was bright on the waves. My elbows sank into the wooden railing of the balcony. I looked over my shoulder into the room. Emily slept. Her naked body wrapped in a sheet.

It was after midnight. The bungalows were quiet on this part of the beach.

I had given her paradise today. I didn’t know what I could give her tomorrow.

There was a weight on my chest. Pushing into my lungs and pressing on my heart. I had brought her with me because the thought of leaving her behind was enough to cripple me.

It wasn’t an option.

I looked for the moment. I searched for the night I didn’t dream about her. I begged for the morning I didn’t wake up missing her. They never came. They never fucking showed up.

I turned my back on the ocean and watched her sleep from a distance. I was in love with every damn thing about her. The soft lines of her body. The silkiness of her golden hair. The light in her laugh. The brilliance of her mind. The sadness in her eyes when she talked about her family. The entire fucking package. That girl had me on my knees the first night. And she hadn’t let up. Not once.

Walking away from her had been the hardest thing I had ever done. I would take a knife to my chest before I ever faced that again.

I had convinced myself she was the job. The mark. If I got some distance from her, the infection would heal. But it didn’t. It grew until all I could picture was her. I closed my eyes and I saw her hover over me. I remembered what it felt like to fuck her. The sexy sounds she moaned in my ear. What it felt like to be the kind of man she wanted. To see how she saw me in her eyes.

How she felt under my hands. Under my body. Her hand in mine. The moments she was wild. The minutes she was tender and vulnerable. She trusted me.

I took a step from the porch. The white curtains flapped in the breeze when I crossed into the room.

There was a price. There was always a price with Blackwing. I had given Emily my soul, but they owned it.

She wanted a life together. For now we had that. But those Thanksgivings she dreamed about. Kids. Whatever else was going on in that smart and pretty head of hers—well, I couldn’t give her a timeline. I couldn’t promise any of it. This might be the best I had to offer her.

And that scared the shit out of me. Was this going to be enough?

The covers moved. Her eyes opened.

“Everything ok?” she whispered.

I strolled to the bed. “Yeah. Checking out the moon. It’s full.”

“Really?” She edged up. The sheet fell from her shoulder, exposing her breast.

I growled. She killed me. She made me feel drunk. Unsteady. Out of control.

I pounced on the bed. Emily squealed.

I pinned her hands over her head. “Ever been fucked under the moonlight?”

She shook her head. “I hope I’m about to.”

I dragged my lips over hers. Our tongues twisted. I wanted to tie her up now and make love to her. The kind of love that was rough and primal. Searing my body into hers. I wanted her so fucking badly.

“Bed or balcony?” I asked, wagging my eyebrows.

“But people could see us.” I saw the alarm in her eyes.

“I don’t think so.” I kissed her throat. “Your choice.” There was a wide hedge of tropical plants and flowers. Someone would have to go out of their way to see what was happening on the porch.

“Balcony.” She breathed.

I grinned. She was perfect. I lifted her into my arms. I hated that she was smaller than when I left. I knew it was my fault. The hollow lines on her stomach. The bones on her hips. But I’d love her back whole. I would take care of her. And I’d never leave.

My mouth covered hers. I couldn’t get enough. I never would.

I wasn’t built to love. I wasn’t that kind of man. I didn’t get attached. I didn’t make memories and relish moments. I was never that man.

Until I met Emily Charles.

I spun her in my arms, so that her hands were planted on the railing.

Her back rubbed against my chest, while I stroked her breasts. Her nipples hardened at my touch.

“Ohh,” she moaned.

I couldn’t take it. She drove me wild.

My hands slid over her back, pushing her forward, hiking her hips toward me. I pushed my cock between her legs. As she jutted her ass higher I slid into her heat, wanting to bury myself inside her. Needing her warmth. Craving her pussy. She clenched and tugged around me.

I pumped hard. Drove into her. She called my name with ragged breaths.

“Vaughn, tell me,” she begged.

And that’s who I was. I was Vaughn Hunter to her. That was the man she loved. The one she needed. I would be him.

“I love you,” I moaned. “I love you, Em.”

“Oh, God.” She rocked into me so I plunged deep to her core. “I love you too.”

We scaled a sexual peak in record time. My spine gripped with tension just as I released inside her. She screamed my name as her own orgasm hit.

“Fuck, Em. Fucking insane,” I groaned.

I held her while her body jolted with pleasure. Bursts of electric sensation.

Her forehead rested on the railing, but I scooped her in my arms and carried her back to bed.

I kissed her as she nuzzled against my chest.

“There’s your moonlight sex,” I joked. I felt drunk off her. Drunk enough to fuck her again. All night. Every night.

“We have to leave tomorrow?” she asked. “I like the islands.”

“We can come back.”

“When?” She propped up on her elbows.

“Depends on how long the France job takes. And if there is one right after. I’ll bring you back, though.”

She chewed on her bottom lip. I knew she was thinking of another question. She never had only one.

“If you don’t like it will you tell them no?”

I exhaled. “It’s not like that. I don’t make those kind of calls.”

“But shouldn’t you? What if it threatens someone’s life? What if it threatens a country?”

“Slow down.”

She was up on her knees. “I can’t help but think about the defense contracts you stole. Who did they go to?”

“I didn’t ask.”

“How could you not ask?”

I sat up. “I’m a soldier. I was trained to take orders. That’s part of my DNA.”

“And I’m an attorney. I was trained to be curious. To pursue the truth. To ask questions.”

“And I’d like to add you’re excellent at it.”

Her lips were pouty. “Vaughn. This is serious.”

“I can’t be more serious. You and Blackwing have nothing to do with each other. Nothing. You aren’t going to get involved with my assignments. No questions. No moral compass shit. Do you understand?”

“But Blackwing knows about me?”

I nodded. “They do.” I wished like hell they didn’t. “And that’s where things end. Stay out of this, Em. If it helps go back to pretending I’m in investments. I’ll have a new identity in France anyway. A new career you can bug me about. But not this one. Not Blackwing.”

“Have you thought about leaving?”

“Emily.” My voice was stern.

“You have millions, right? Why can’t we just disappear? Maybe here on the island? I like it here.” She curled her hands around my torso. I felt the fire from her touch.

The danger we were in was mine to bear. The deal I had made.

“Babe, we need to get some sleep. We have to fly to France tomorrow.” I leaned up to kiss her. “You’ll see how things work. I’m going to take care of all it.”

She lowered herself to my chest. “Your heart is beating so fast,” she whispered.

I stroked her hair. “Moonlight sex,” I lied.

I swore I wouldn’t keep secrets from her. I promised I would answer her questions whenever she asked. But there was a limit. A limit that Blackwing had given me.

I never wanted to lose her again. It would break us both.

The only thing that could tear us apart was keeping her safe. Because there was nothing I wouldn’t do to make sure Emily always had tomorrow. Nothing.

* * *

There was screaming. It was loud. Deafening. I realized it was coming from me. The more I struggled to find my breath, the harder it was for my lungs to work. I felt as if I were drowning. I kicked wildly. My arms were pinned to my side, keeping me from moving.

“Em, it’s ok. You’re ok. I’ve got you.” I heard the warmth of his voice.

I opened my eyes. I had squeezed them shut in my sleep. “Vaughn?”

“Yeah. You were having a nightmare. I think it was a nightmare?” He looked lost. Worried. “I’ve been trying to wake you.”

I pulled my knees into my chest. I was still rattled from the dream. It had been vivid. So tangible I could still feel the pain. There was a thin layer of perspiration across my skin.

“What scared you like that?” he asked.

I shook my head. I didn’t want to tell him. I didn’t want to admit a dream had affected me like that. “I can’t remember. It’s foggy.”

“Do you think you can fall back asleep?”

He pulled me against his chest, sliding us under the covers so that his arm enveloped my waist in a tight hold. I didn’t mind how warm he was.

I nodded, glad he couldn’t see my face. My eyes would give it away. He would be able to see the fear coursing through me.

“Get some sleep.”

It wasn’t long before his chest rose with the natural rhythm of his breathing. It was easy for him to fall asleep. I couldn’t close my eyes.

I carefully lifted his arm, peeling it away from my hip as I rolled to the side and put my feet on the floor. I closed the door to the bedroom and sat by the window overlooking the city.

It was our first night in Paris. My first time ever in the city.

Tomorrow Vaughn would get his assignment.

The bubble we had created would be gone. Vaughn couldn’t create a sphere strong enough to keep his job from invading our life. I was worried. I was paranoid. I was distracted beyond reason.

How did I move forward, knowing he was stealing? That he was plotting and scheming to take something that didn’t belong to Blackwing.

I buried my head in my hands.

How could I tell him that doubts had surfaced? How could I admit to him that as soon as we’d left the Bahamas there was a pit in my stomach that had done nothing but grow until I could barely breathe? How could I tell him about the dream?

I wasn’t a psychic. I didn’t believe in that crap. But the dream had seemed like a prediction of our future. I knew it was my fears playing out in my subconscious. That didn’t make it feel any less terrifying though.

What if it haunted me every day? What if this is what our nights were going be like? Sex that shattered me to my soul. A nightmare that claimed it.

I tucked my feet under me, sitting as curled as a cat. My eyes scanned the lights in front of me, still in disbelief that just this morning I had been looking at the ocean and now I was only miles away from Montmarte.

“Babe, what are you doing?”

I jumped when I heard Vaughn’s voice over my shoulder.

I spun to face him. “I thought you were asleep.”

“I was.”

“It’s the time change. I can’t sleep,” I couldn’t believe I lied again.

He strolled toward me. His chiseled chest cased in shadows from the hotel suite.

The sight of his body brought everything back. I was drawn to him. Bound to him. He moved me in a way that defied logic and love. This man consumed me. He kneeled in front of the chair. The lights from the window splintered across his face.

“Why can’t you sleep? The truth this time.”

My resistance faltered. I didn’t know if I was weak for wanting him to take away the fear. Or if I was tired from trying to sort through everything myself.

“I can’t sleep because of the dream I had,” I admitted. “It was horrible.”

“Was I in it?” he asked.

I nodded. “Yes.”

“Then tell me.” He shrugged. “Whatever it was, it was only a dream, babe.”

“It’s stupid to let something like that bother me.” I tried to brush it off. I believed the words. I was too logical and rational to fall victim to a nightmare.

“Doesn’t matter. It’s keeping you from getting sleep. And I’m up, so let’s hear it. What happened in the dream? Why did you scream like that?”

The chill seeped into my veins.

“I watched you die,” I whispered.

“Whoa.”

I didn’t think I could look at him. “It was only a dream. I know that.”

He sat on the floor, his back pressed against the wall under the windows. “Is this because of tomorrow? Because I’m going to be fine. I’ve been doing this a long time now. I’m very good at my job.”

I knew exactly how good he was.

“You don’t have anything to worry about.”

“How can you say that? How do you know that?” I spat the questions.

“I just do. This is Paris. We’re going to eat croissants and see the Eiffel Tower. I’ll take you to the art museums. The food is—”

“I don’t care about French food. I care about whether you live or die. Whether all that changes tomorrow.”

He sighed. “I don’t know any other way to tell you. You’ll get used to it, Em. Once we get in a routine and you see how normal it can be, you won’t be worried like this. You’ll sleep again. I promise.”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever sleep again.” I shoved myself from the chair and walked to the kitchenette to pour something to drink. I wanted water, but reached from the bottle of wine instead. We had opened it after dinner.

“What are you doing?”

“Having a drink.” The wine sloshed in the glass.

I didn’t know if he thought I was coming off the rails, but I did. I inhaled the wine, chugging until the glass was empty.

“Feel better?” He stood in front of me.

“Maybe.”

He took the bottle from my hand and placed it out of reach. “On the plane this morning you said you were excited. Did you mean it?”

“What?” My eyes flashed to his.

“Tell me. Are you excited about our life? Because if you’ve had second thoughts, I’ll send you back to DC. You don’t have to do this. I realize what I’ve asked of you. You could be in your own bed by tomorrow. You and Greer can catch up. Call your mom and tell her you’re sorry you missed Thanksgiving. They’ll forgive you. They’ll never know you left with me. Is that what you want?”

“You want to send me away?” I whispered.

“Fuck no.” He slammed his fist on the counter. “That’s the last thing I want. But I don’t know what to do. You’re scared. You can’t sleep. You have a few days before all hell breaks loose at the bureau. A few days left before they start to search for you and your identity is no longer your own.

“My job starts tomorrow. I can’t do it if you’re only half in this with me. This is your last chance to resume your life. Your old life as Emily Charles. Is that what you want? Do you want me to let you go?”

The wine tingled through my arms until my fingertips were warm. My mouth felt dry.

I pictured what he was saying. I could see his offer playing out. I’d board a plane for DC. I could use my fake ID one last time and no one would ever know I had left the country. I’d land and take a cab to our brownstone. I’d walk up three flights of stairs with my suitcase and come up with some lame reason for why I had to get away. Greer would understand I was still nursing a broken heart. She wouldn’t ask many questions. I would take her pity.

Once I blended into my life again the darkness would set in. The blackness that swallowed me whole when Vaughn was gone would take me to my knees. I swore I’d never make it if he left again. I couldn’t survive that kind of mind-splitting agony. I didn’t want to. I wanted him. I wanted this.

And this meant shedding my hold on morality. This meant learning to live with guilt. This meant loving him no matter what it cost my soul.

“No.” I shook my head. “I don’t want to go home.”

He exhaled. “Shit, Em. Don’t scare me like that.”

He pulled me against his chest and my hands wrapped around his back.

“I don’t ever want to leave. I swear. I’m sorry I’m scared. I’m sorry.”

He tipped my chin toward his lips. His mouth brushed over mine with the kind of tenderness that sent a rush of heat down my spine.

“Let me take you back to bed.”

I nodded as he scooped me in his arms, lifting my legs from the floor. My feet dangled as he carried me to the bedroom. I felt light in his hold. As if he would protect me from all the nightmares. From the dreams. From reality if he had to.

“Are you all in?” He laid me on the bed. “I need to know.”

“I’m all in. I don’t have any doubts about us. About you. I swear.”

As he peeled the shirt from my body, it was true—I had no doubt this was where I wanted to be. It didn’t mean I wasn’t scared. It didn’t mean that I didn’t need time to let the bruises on my heart heal.

I knew he had me. I knew there was only going forward.

* * *

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