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Don't Tell by Violet Paige (132)

Natalia

I was supposed to be prepared for this. I had told myself repeatedly that seeing Sam Hickson wouldn’t affect me, but I watched as he hit the ground and I had to keep myself from running on the field to see if he was okay. Who does that? What was I thinking? Where had that need come from?

I wasn’t a medic. I wasn’t even his girlfriend. But I felt it. The pull to him the instant I thought something was wrong. I didn’t want him to be hurt or feel pain. I waited nervously for a sign that it wasn’t a serious hit.

I had to get out of Sam’s city. The only problem was, we weren’t leaving until tomorrow. The Warriors had decided to do promotion for the Goddesses in San Antonio. I didn’t know why. And now I realized why I had felt anxiety all week. It was the same feeling I got before a big performance. My hands were sweaty and I’d wake up in the middle of the night for no reason. I tried to reassure myself I was fine, but I wasn’t. How could I be with Sam this close?

He jumped up and ran back to the line. I let out a big breath. He was okay. I turned to face the fans and smiled, kicking my leg high in the air.

It had been a month. A month that didn’t include him. A full month of me throwing myself into practice as if I were the most dedicated Goddess on the squad. A month where I made appearances at charity events and hospitals. A month when I posed for two different calendars. A month I fell asleep begging myself not to dream about his body. A month when I had failed at anything to do with shutting Sam Hickson out of my thoughts.

* * *

The forty girls on the team had a bus for driving around San Antonio. I hauled my bag to the side of the big vehicle blowing diesel exhaust, and shoved it underneath the cargo hold. The mood around the team wasn’t good. They had lost again. And there was nothing worse than losing to the Wranglers.

“I hate it when the guys lose,” Heather whined.

“Me too.” I patted her shoulder.

We walked up the stairs and took a seat behind the driver. I heard we were staying on the Riverwalk. The guys were flying back to Austin tonight. I was glad we weren’t on the same flight. I knew what that trip would be like.

They would argue about the refs, and how there was a conspiracy to make the Wranglers Texas’s team. They’d curse like sailors and complain about the plane. I’d heard it before.

It was a quick ride to the hotel, and we gathered around the side of the bus as our bags were tossed on the sidewalk. I selected mine from the pile and lugged it on my shoulder.

“Glad we’re rooming together.” Heather walked up next to me. “It’ll be like training camp.”

“Except we don’t have to get up at five,” I reminded her.

“True. We can sleep in for once.”

Our manager had emailed the schedule for tomorrow and our first photo shoot didn’t start until almost eleven. I had a vision of sleeping in and ordering room service. It sounded as if Heather was as tired as I was. We practiced four days a week, made charitable appearances, met early before games, and danced for four hours straight during the games. By the time the game was over, we were exhausted. Mondays were usually our days off, but not this time. We had to work.

It took a while for all of us to check in. It would have been nice if the squad had let us have our own rooms, but if I had to have a roommate, Heather was a good choice. I felt closer to her over the past month. She knew my secret about Sam, and even though we didn’t discuss what happened, it gave us an intangible connection.

She handed me the key card to the room. “What if we get in our PJs and have a romcom marathon and order some dinner?”

I smiled. “I love that idea. I don’t think I can muster up the energy to go out. I’m exhausted.”

“I call dibs on the shower.” She giggled, pretending to race me to the elevators.

I wished we were in a fancy hotel with big Jacuzzi tubs, but there was no way ownership would spring for that. The back of my leg was starting to ache. It usually did after a game. It was another reminder that I wasn’t ready for troupe auditions. The more I danced, the stronger I became. Sticking with the Goddesses had been good for me. It was increasing my stamina and my muscle awareness. I saw that now.

I followed Heather in the elevator and to our room. She took the bed closest to the window.

“Why don’t you look for the romance channel while I hop in the shower?”

“All right.” I picked up the remote and sat on the edge of the bed.

I was still wearing my Warriors traveling suit that marked us as the dance team when we were going to a game. The pants were tight, but stretchy, and the top zipped up over a sports bra.

I looked around the room when I heard the phone buzz. I leaned over a pile of pillows and grabbed the receiver.

“Hello?”

“Hello, this is the front desk.”

“Hi.”

“I have a delivery for a Ms. Dupont.”

“Me? What is it?” I couldn’t imagine what was at the desk. We hadn’t ordered food yet. “I’m not expecting anything. It might be for one of the other girls.”

“No, no. It specifically says Natalia Dupont.”

“Oh. Okay, I guess I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

“Thank you, Ms. Dupont.”

I hung up and knocked on the bathroom door. “Hey, Heather, I have to run down to the front desk to pick up something. I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, I’m almost finished,” she called through the door.

She had been in there at least fifteen minutes. I doubted she was in a rush to get out.

I picked up the second key card and shoved it in my jacket pocket. I tried to think of what was waiting for me downstairs as I rode the elevator to the lobby level.

As soon as the doors retracted, I knew. He didn’t have to turn around for me to recognize him.

Sam.

He must have heard the elevator ding because he spun around to face me.

I was afraid to approach him. My heart pounded. I was certain he’d be able to hear it. I froze next to the elevators.

Was it stupid that I wanted to run and jump in his arms? At the same time, I couldn’t move.

“Natalia.” His eyes lit up and it all came flooding back.

The night in Austin together. The night I gave myself to him completely. The night that haunted me no matter what I tried to do to forget it.

He walked toward me and I felt the blood rush through my veins.

“Wh-what are you doing here?” I stammered.

“I wanted to see you,” he replied.

God, that voice. It was smooth and low and made my core start to ache.

I looked around the lobby, realizing one of the Goddesses could spot us talking. I grabbed his arm and pulled him into the closest room I could find. It was a ballroom the hotel used for conferences. It was dark inside, and I suddenly realized this might be worse than being seen together in the light.

“We can’t… We said we wouldn’t…” I couldn’t put a full sentence together.

Sam’s hands rested on my face and pulled my mouth toward him. I took a breath before his lips descended on mine. I didn’t know if it was instinct, want, or pure misery from missing him, but I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him harder than I’d ever kissed anyone in my life. His tongue whipped wickedly over my tongue and I moaned when I felt his teeth nip along my bottom lip, dragging it playfully.

“God,” he groaned. “It’s better. It’s how I remembered.”

“Don’t stop.” I reached for his lips again, inhaling his mouth, pressing into him with my body.

It felt as if there was fire in my fingertips as I roamed his body. I couldn’t touch him enough, or cut the distance between us. I panted with every kiss.

“How?” I looked into his eyes. “How did you find me?”

He exhaled. “I called around until someone confirmed this is where your squad is staying.”

“Oh. And they told you?”

“Not room numbers, but I knew you were staying overnight at one of the Riverwalk hotels. Our press guy filled me in.”

“Right.” My chest was about to explode. His hands slid to my ass and he squeezed. He spun me against the wall until my back was flat as his body pinned me.

“And my last name?” I asked.

He kissed my throat and breathed heavily. “I looked you up on the Goddesses’ roster.”

I wanted to crumple on the floor. Sometimes I forgot I was listed on a website for anyone to see.

His lips hovered until they crashed against me. His kiss was rough this time.

“I want you, Natalia.”

“Oh, God.” His lips feathered over my throat and I felt myself awaken with need and want I hadn’t felt in a month.

“Let’s go to your room,” he suggested. He pushed my arms over my head and held my wrists together.

I shook my head. “I have a roommate.”

“Roommate?” But his lips didn’t stop.

“Yes.” His hands were digging into the band at my waist. I moaned as he slipped a hand between the layers of clothing and skin. His fingers moved between my folds until I knew he was coated in my essence.

I quivered, my knees shaking as he held me to the wall and his fingers made circles that tightened the coil in my belly. He pinched the delicate outline of my clit and I whimpered.

“I have a plan,” he growled into my ear.

“What?” I whispered.

“I’ll get a room here.”

His finger plunged inside my entrance and I bit my lip. I started clenching and squeezing around it.

I nodded. I wasn’t thinking. I was only feeling. And what Sam was doing to me was sinful bliss. My body reacted to him with unleashed passion. He kissed my neck and added another finger.

“But first.” His eyes were on me. “I’m going to watch you come like this.”

My chest rose with heavy breaths. I couldn’t look away. His fingers worked their magic between my legs as the intensity spiraled.

I was wet and panting, pinned to the wall. My hips gyrated toward him, wanting him to fill me every time he pulled away.

“Fuck me like this, Natalia,” he ordered. And I lost all control. My hips bucked and my muscles clutched around his fingers. It was building inside me like a wildfire and there wasn’t anything that could extinguish the heat except Sam.

I tried to look away, but his voice deepened. “No. Look in my eyes when you come.”

I stared at him, knowing I was seconds away from exploding. My thighs tingled and my belly pulsed when the orgasm hit me.

“Oh, God, Sam.” I breathed. I let it circle my body from head to toe as the heat warmed me.

His hands slid from between my legs. “I’m going to get that room now.” He kissed me and ducked out of the door.

My head fell back on the wall and I tried to steady myself. But I knew I wasn’t steady. I was off balance and off center. My body wasn’t mine when Sam was around. I tried to straighten my jacket and rearrange my pants.

A few minutes later, the conference room door opened. “Come on.”

“Wait.” I stopped him.

“What is it?” he asked.

“I don’t think we can do this.” I didn’t want to tell him, but I had enough time to regulate my heart rate.

“Of course we can. And we are.”

“I’ll get fired if anyone finds out that I was with you,” I tried to explain.

I was also starting to feel guilt. I had promised Heather she could count on me to be a quality Goddess and sleeping with Sam broke that promise. She was upstairs expecting a romcom marathon, and I was in a dark ballroom hooking up with the enemy.

He wrapped an arm around my waist and I felt my resolve slip too quickly.

“So don’t tell anyone.”

I pressed against his chest and felt the solid muscle under his T-shirt. Holy shit. I had forgotten how ripped he was.

“It’s not that easy. I have a roommate who thinks I’m downstairs picking something up. She’s waiting for me to order in and watch movies all night. I can’t go with you. I just can’t.”

He pulled the hair from my face. “Do you know I tried to find you after the last game?”

“You did?”

He nodded. “I ran from one end of that stadium to the other looking for you. I tried every door, every damn tunnel. And I couldn’t find you.”

“You tried to find me even though we agreed? You weren’t supposed to do that.”

“I did it anyway. And then I ran into Floyd and had to get back to the bus. But I was as surprised as you were that we were… who we are,” he finished.

“I’m not a Goddess, really. I mean I am, but it’s not my career and I didn’t want you to know.” I hung my head. “It’s not who I am.”

“Who do you want me to know?” His voice was low and deep.

“The ballerina I used to be,” I answered. I almost had tears in my eyes. I was glad it was dark and he couldn’t see me. “The girl who danced on water. The prima ballerina who had confidence and grace.”

“And you don’t think I see all those things?”

“I don’t know what you see. I don’t want you to look at me like I’m one of the Goddess dancers. That I know.”

He lifted my chin with his finger. “I don’t care what you do. It doesn’t matter to me if you dance for the Goddesses or an orchestra. I’m here tonight, you’re here tonight, and I have a room for us.” He held up the key card. “Let’s use it.”

“And get fired?” I tried to wiggle free, but he was strong. “I don’t plan on having this job much longer, but right now, it’s all I have. I can’t get fired, Sam. You are off limits. I can’t be with you.”

“But you just said you don’t want to be a Goddess. I’m fucking confused.”

I sighed. “I’m going back to the ballet. I am. But auditions aren’t until March. I have to stay with the Goddesses until then. And as long as I’m on the Warriors’ dance roster I cannot under any circumstances be seen with a Wrangler. I gave them my word. It breaks the Goddesses’ code.” I folded my arms, thinking I had made my point.

“And I can’t let you out of San Antonio without another night together, so we better figure this out right now.”

He let go of me and pulled out a chair at one of the tables. It was set for an accountants’ meeting in the morning.

“Sit,” he ordered.

I took a seat as he sat across from me.

“This is crazy. I work for the Warriors. You work for the Wranglers.”

“Darlin’, I’m aware of this situation, but I have a bigger problem and you’re the only one who can fix it.”

“What’s that?”

“Look, I don’t date during the season. I don’t go near women.”

I crossed my arms. I wasn’t sure I liked where this was going.

“But, the more I try to forget you, the more you’re in my head. That night is in my head. And I think being with you is the only way to keep my game straight.”

I felt a flare of anger. “You think I’m some kind of good luck charm?” I was louder than I meant to be.

“No. I didn’t say that. I said you’re in my head. I think I see you in the crowd and I drop the ball. I think I hear your voice and I run the wrong route. I remember that night and I block the wrong guy.”

I was quiet for a moment. “What if I told you the same thing? Not routes or blocking guys, but I’ve missed steps and routines. I called the wrong cheer and almost kicked one of the girls in the face because I went the wrong direction.”

“Then I’d say there’s only one way to get out of each other’s head.”

“And my roommate?”

He thought quickly. “Call up to the room and tell her your uncle came by to see you.”

“Uncle?” I giggled.

“Make up someone.”

I knew he was right. I had to be with him tonight. As badly as he needed to be with me. And I’d tell an endless pot of lies if that was what it took to get in his bed. No matter how wrong this was. No matter what codes I broke.

“What’s the room number?” I asked.

“402.”

“I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

He leaned over the table, brushing his lips over mine. The kiss blistered my lips and I reached for his neck, needing more. He broke away.

“See you soon.”

He walked out and I went in search of the complimentary concierge phone to call Heather.

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