I don’t realize I’ve fallen asleep until I open my eyes. I blink into the bright room, disoriented and a bit confused.

My phone vibrates across the oak coffee table in front of me and like a giant wave, everything washes over me.

Melanie.

I sit up and grab my phone, securing it in my hand just seconds after it stops ringing. Opening the screen, I see have over twenty missed calls and several voicemails. I don’t check one.

It’s like I already know what’s happened without anyone telling me.

I can feel her—or rather, my heart can.

Sliding on my coat, I grab the letter I wrote last night and a picture of Mel and me as kids and shove them into my coat pocket.

I’m already out the door and jogging toward Melanie’s house where my car is parked before I hit redial on the last number that called. My mom’s voice immediately crosses the line.

“Oh, Cole. Thank God. We’ve been trying to call you.”

My heart is hammering so hard inside my chest I can feel the vibration across my entire body.

“Mom, is it Mel? What’s going on?” I ask, digging my keys out of my pocket to unlock my car.

“You need to get here... Now!”

“Mom! What is happening?”  I almost yell into the phone, needing her to just spit it out already.

“She’s awake.”

It’s the words I’ve been waiting three days to hear.

“I’m on my way.” It’s my only response before I end the call and jump into my car.

I don’t know how I get to the hospital. The entire drive over feels like some sort of dream, and now I’m walking down tiled floors just waiting for someone to wake me up, to tell me this has all been some sick dream.

I see my mother first. She’s standing in the hallway outside of Melanie’s room talking to Corrine. They both appear to have been crying recently.

I don’t know what to think, how to feel, how to react. I have only one thought...

Melanie.

I step past them both without a word, my eyes connecting with Mel’s the instant I enter the room. I swear to God she’s all I see, and it takes everything in me not to fall apart right here on the spot.

I’m crying before I even reach her, and so is she. Neither of us says a word as I take a seat next to her on the bed, my hand reaching out to trace the side of her face.

She looks so much different than she did just twelve hours ago. The tubes and wires are gone. All that’s left is an I.V. in her left arm, a hospital bracelet on her wrist, and a thick cast on her right arm that extends to just below her elbow.

“I’m real,” she chokes, fresh tears pooling in those incredible green eyes I was scared I would never see again.

She’s always been able to read me so well.

“Melanie.”

It’s the only word I can muster before she’s pulling me into her arms, my head resting against her chest as she gently rocks me.

“Shhh. It’s okay.” She smooths my hair with her good hand. “I’ve got you.”

I don’t say anything. I just hold onto my girl for dear life, loving the sound of her heart beating against my ear and the feel of her chest rising and falling as she breathes on her own.

Leave it Melanie to comfort me rather than the other way around. She’s always been that way, putting everyone else before herself. And I’m the sorry sap who drinks up her reassurances, her soothing words, and her promises to never leave me. Because I’m a selfish bastard, and I need to hear everything she’s saying.

I don’t know how long we lay like that, my tears soaking into her hospital gown as I truly let myself go for the first time since the accident. I know that there will never be enough. Enough time, enough touches, enough heart beats; enough of anything.

“Come here,” Melanie says when I finally resurface, cupping my cheek as she kisses me softly. “It’s okay.” She breathes against my lips, dropping her forehead against mine. “I’m okay,” she reassures me.

“I thought I lost you.” My voice sounds strained when I finally speak. “I couldn’t breathe, Mel. I lost my heart.” I pound a closed palm to my chest.

“Because you loaned it to me.” She smiles softly, running her hand along my beard. “You saved me you know. It’s like I could feel you trying to pull me from the darkness.”

“I tried, Mel. I spent hours—two full days—just talking to you, letting you know I was here waiting for you to wake up. I’ve never been so scared in my entire life. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up.”

“Don’t. Don’t do that. I know you were here the whole time, and I know your mom and Joan had to force you to go get some sleep, and I’m glad for it. I never want you to not take care of yourself. Because you—you are the most important person in the world to me. And I kinda care what happens to you.” She grins.

“Just kinda?” I tease.

It’s like nothing has happened and she’s still the same ole Melanie she’s always been, not a girl who just spent three days unconscious and nearly died from hypothermia. She’s so resilient. So strong.

Much stronger than I’ll ever be.

“They told me you’re the one who found me. That if you hadn’t I would have been dead within an hour.” She falls serious again, fighting back tears. “I’m so sorry you had to see me that way. I can’t imagine how scared you must have been. But I’m not sorry you found me. Because if you hadn’t I wouldn’t be here right now—talking to you, touching you. So thank you. Thank you for saving my life.”

“How could you have been so reckless?” I scorn her without a trace of anger in my voice. “You risked your life, and in turn mine, all for a dirty, little kitten?”

“Did you get him?” she abruptly asks, pulling away to look around like it’s going to appear magically. “The kitten, is it okay?”

“You just spent three days unconscious, and you’re still worried about that damn kitten?” I can’t help the laughter in my voice. After all we’ve been through over the past few days, I have to find humor somewhere.

“You said it yourself, I risked my life for it. Now, did you get it?”

“One of the firefighters rescued him and took him to the local vet. And then Corrine being Corrine went and adopted the damn thing so she could give it to you when you woke up.”

“So it’s a he? And he’s okay?”

“He’s perfect, and he’s all yours when you’re ready for him.” I smile, tucking her hair over her shoulder.

“You’re going to let me have a kitten in your beautiful apartment?” she asks, cocking her eyebrow up in question.

“Our apartment,” I remind her.

“Wait, did I agree to move in with you?” I can see the playfulness in her eyes.

“Melanie.” I narrow my gaze at her.

“Fine, our apartment. Are you really going to let me bring a kitten home?”

“Will it make you happy?” I ask, unable to contain my smile.

“Yes,” she blurts out excitedly.

“Then yes. You can bring it home with us.”

Suddenly her arms are around my neck, and she’s pulling me into her embrace. She takes a deep, shaky breath and then lets it out slowly, holding onto me so tight I’m afraid she might hurt her broken arm.

“I love you, Cole Lincoln,” she says, her voice full of emotion.

“I love you, Melanie Anderson.” I smile, knowing I’ve never meant something more than I do those words.

The last twenty-four hours have been an endless parade of visitors. While Melanie smiles and acts like she’s perfect, I can tell she isn’t quite there. She gets tired really easy and dozes off every couple of hours between friends and family popping in.

I don’t leave her side for any of it.

Nurses and doctors are in every hour like clockwork, checking her vitals, giving her fluids and oxygen. I naively believed that once she woke up everything would be okay again, but there are pretty severe complications that accompany someone who’s suffered hypothermia. On top of having fluid in her lungs, the doctors are monitoring her heart rather closely checking for any signs of an irregular heartbeat. So far everything looks good, and the doctors seem hopeful that she’ll make a full recovery. Thank God.

It’s just after ten p.m. when she finally wakes again after a three hour stint. I watch her eyes flutter open as she blinks into the dimly lit room. It takes only seconds for her gaze to find me in the chair next to her bed.

“Hey,” she says, her voice still thick with sleep.

“Hey.” I lean forward and brush a hair from her cheek with the back of my hand.

“I fell asleep again.” She yawns.

“You need your rest.” I take her hand, careful not to disrupt the I.V. port they moved from her arm to her hand a few hours ago.

The nurse said her vein gave out, so they had to move it to a new one. I freaked out at first, but apparently it’s not an uncommon thing, and the nurse didn’t seem the least bit concerned or fazed by it. Most importantly it didn’t really seem to bother Melanie, and that’s all I really care about.

“I’ve been resting for three days.”

“But your body is still healing. The doctor said you’ll need a lot of rest in the days to come.” I lift her hand and kiss her knuckles.

“I had a dream,” she states, not elaborating beyond it.

“What did you dream about?” I ask.

“Michael.” She turns her head, looking off into the distance. “He talked to me, told me that I needed to stop nearly killing myself because if I die then there would be no one left to keep your dumb ass out of trouble.” She smiles, turning her head back toward me.

“Who’s he calling a dumb ass?” I huff.

“He said he always knew we’d end up together. That he’s known ever since we were kids. He’s glad you finally got your head out of your ass and manned up.”

“He was always the king of busting my balls.”

“You know, I never really understood that phrase.” She shakes her head.

“Believe it or not, it actually stems from something that cattle operators do as a form of castration. They physically bust their balls.” I cringe and so does she.

“Why do you know that?”

“Because I’m full of useless information.” I grin.

“That’s sick.” She crinkles her nose as a shiver runs through her.

“Are you cold?” I stand, prepared to go get her an extra blanket.

“No, I’m traumatized because of what you just told me.” She seems thoroughly repulsed which only makes me smile wider.

“Okay. Tell me more about the dream.” I settle back into my seat. “That should get your mind off of it,” I suggest.

She sucks in a slow breath, pulling off the nasal oxygen tube and letting it drape around her neck.

“It was so weird. We just talked for what felt like forever and yet no time at all. There was nothing around us, no part of our surroundings that I can remember, but it felt like we were somewhere important.” She pauses for a brief moment before continuing. “He said he’s happy. That he’s at peace.” Her eyes instantly glaze over. “That we don’t need to worry about him anymore.” She wipes at one solitary tear that escapes her eye.

“Mel.” I squeeze her fingers.

“I know. It was just a dream. But, Cole, it felt so real.”

“Then maybe it wasn’t just a dream. Maybe it was Michael’s way of letting you know that you don’t need to worry about him anymore.”

“Do you think so?” she asks, her bright eyes wide with curiosity.

“Considering everything that’s happened over the last few days, I’d say anything is possible,” I reassure her. “Did I tell you that when I woke up at Joan’s, before I even looked at my phone or spoke to anyone, that I knew you were awake?”

“How?” Her voice is quiet, a whisper into the air around us.

“I don’t know how to explain it. I just had this, I don’t know, this feeling. It was overwhelming, and I just knew.”

“I love you.” She smiles softly at me, reaching up to scratch her fingers through my beard. “God, I love you so much.”

“And I love you. Always have. Always will.” I turn her hand up and kiss her palm before wrapping my fingers around hers. “You were the first girl I loved— the only girl I’ve ever loved—and I know with complete certainty that you’ll be the last as well. I will die loving you, Melanie Anderson. Because this,”—I tap my chest with my free hand—“this is yours. I gave it to you at ten-years-old, and I don’t ever want it back.”

She untangles her fingers from mine and pulls me up into the bed with her. Making sure not to get tangled in her I.V. wires, I turn on my side and snuggle in next to her so we’re lying face to face.

She reaches out and takes my hand, placing my palm flat against her chest.

“This is yours.” She repeats my words. “I gave it to you at ten-years-old, and I don’t ever want it back.”

“Good,”—I lean forward, smiling against her lips—“because I’m never giving it back,” I whisper, kissing her softly before resting my head on the pillow with hers, our foreheads touching.

It only takes about thirty minutes before sleep claims my beautiful girl once again. I don’t move an inch as I watch her.

I’m overwhelmed with the amount of love I have for this girl. And I’m terrified because I know now that if I lose her, I’ll never recover. It’s scary being that dependent on another human being. But if there’s one person in the world I want to depend on, and for her to depend on me, it’s Melanie.

It’s always been Melanie.

It will always be Melanie.

We may not have done it in the most graceful way, but we fell just the same. We made so many mistakes along the way, I made so many mistakes, but I’m done fighting this. I’m done complicating it and running out of fear.

It’s not always about how we fall, it’s about where we end up once we land.