Chapter 44
Lucas
I toss and turn all night. My bed feels huge. It seems so big and cold without Olivia next to me. I miss her. Just a few hours apart and I feel like I lost a part of myself.
I didn’t like the way we left off and consider calling her in the middle of the night just to say “I love you.” She needs to know we’re doing the right thing. But I don't want to smother her, so I lay in the dark trying to force sleep to come.
I think about how much my life changed over the last few months. I never thought I’d consider marriage again and yet here I am, engaged. I swore I’d never step foot in my father’s house, yet I did. And I survived. I even faced Stacy with a small amount of dignity intact.
I owe it all to Olivia.
The life I’m planning with her promises to be complete and fulfilling. Since she entered my life everything has changed. I went from being an insincere douche to being me again.
And I’m happy.
I didn’t think I'd know happiness again. I owe her so much. Why can’t I bend once more? Why not have one more encounter with my father just to make her happy?
Because the thought of the son-of-a-bitch sends ice through my veins. But one smile from Olivia could melt the largest iceberg. One dinner. In a public venue. I can handle that.
Maybe.
*
The morning can’t pass quick enough. I need to see Olivia. I need to make things right. I have a plan and hope it satisfies her.
I adjust my schedule so I have an extra hour for lunch. First I stop at a florist and buy a bouquet of mixed flowers. I know they’ll make her smile. It’s a start. I park my car outside my father’s office and sit for twenty minutes struggling with my conflicting emotions.
In the end, what she feels outweighs my anxiety. I force myself out of the car. If I take one step at a time I can do it. I look around before walking through the front door searching for something. I just have no idea what.
I find my courage once more and enter the building. With long strides and flowers in hand, I approach the receptionist.
The same middle aged, overly made up, petite blonde I spoke to a few weeks earlier mans the welcome window. I hope she won’t remember me. My embarrassing exit felt more like a murderous getaway than a casual walk out of the office.
“Hello.” I smile, flashing my dimples her way. “I’d like to see Dr. Stillwell.”
“Are you a patient?” She asks looking down at her schedule, not making eye contact.
“No,” I answer steadily in spite of my throbbing heartbeat.
“Do you have an appointment?” This time she looks at me, a trace of annoyance on her face.
I lean my forearm on the counter between us and shift my weight forward. I speak low so only she can hear, making sure to keep the smile glued on my lips. “Dr. Stillwell isn’t expecting me.”
“Well then, I’m sorry. I can make an appointment for you, or you can leave your number and a message,” she picks up her pen and notepad.
“That’s not necessary.”
I reach out and touch her hand. It’s a move that often brings me results. Girls get giddy when they think I’m flirting and will gladly hand over what I want. This woman is older. A little more experienced than my usual target. She wears a quizzical look, trying to figure out if I’m being kind or hitting on her.
“Pardon me?”
“Perhaps I should introduce myself,” I continue with my voice low so only she could hear. “I’m Lucas Stillwell.”
A look of surprise and recognition washes over her face.
“I haven’t seen my father in some time and hoped to surprise him. I’ll just be a minute.”
“Oh. I’m so sorry, sir.” Her heavily mascaraed eyes grow wide and twinkle as my words sink in. “It’s so nice to meet you, Mr. Stillwell.” She stands and shakes my hand. “Of course we can make an exception for you. I know the Doctor will be thrilled to see you!”
“Thank you.”
“He’s never too busy for you. That was the first thing he told me three years ago when I started working here. If you came to the office, he was to be interrupted no matter what.”
“Thank you very much.” I give her hand a tiny squeeze, still smiling in spite of the lump in my throat.
“He’s in a meeting now, but he should be finishing up any minute. Shall I show you back to his office?”
“That’s okay,” I wink. “I know the way.”
I head past the receptionist into the back, past the waiting rooms with patient files sitting neatly in their holders on the doors, straight to my father’s office.
The door’s closed. I swallow hard contemplating cutting my losses and running, but decide against it. I could handle an encounter with my father, especially if I keep my mind focused on the reason for it. Olivia. There’s nothing I won’t do for her.
Poised to knock I hesitate. Someone’s speaking. A woman. I recognize the voice coming from within the office.
“Please sir, I am not at all comfortable being in here with you,” the soft female voice says.
A cold chill paralyzes me. I know that voice. It’s her.
“I’m sorry, Olivia. Have I done anything to make you uneasy?”
My heart pounds loud and angry. I think it’s going to explode. I can’t breathe. I feel like I’ve been kicked in the groin by a Clydesdale.
He made a move on her. That son-of-a-bitch made a move on my Olivia. I want to tear him apart, but I can't force my feet to move. I stand frozen and eavesdrop.
“Of course not. I just know this would upset Lucas. And that’s reason enough for me.”
I swallow hard. Oxygen fills my lungs. I can breathe again.
He didn't do anything. She won't give him the opportunity. Just like she promised.
“Understandable. When I heard the news I wanted to offer my congratulations. That’s all.”
Footfalls approach the door. I panic and look around searching for someplace to hide. Olivia can’t find me here listening. She’ll think I don’t trust her.
I see the employee’s only sign and dart into the bathroom door along the wall perpendicular to my father’s office. I make it inside seconds before he and Olivia step out.
Standing in the dark I try to calm my racing heart. Shielding myself behind the door, I know I’ll make it look worse if I get caught from breathing heavy. Still I can't help myself. I watch through the crack of the door jam. I look and listen to the rest of the interaction, praying no one finds me here.
“If you don’t mind my asking, was it worth losing your son?”
I can’t believe my ears.
My father forces a sad smile, “Nothing in this life is worth losing your family. Especially the family I had.”
“I’m sorry, I have no right to . . .”
He interrupts her, and places his hand on her shoulder for reassurance. “My dear girl, you have every right. You are going to marry my son. That gives you the right to call me on the carpet when I deserve it.”
Olivia hesitates before continuing, “Why did you do it? I mean, you’re a good looking man. You’re a doctor. I’m sure you could’ve had anyone you wanted, why her?”
He shakes his head. “I’m not going to try to justify what I did. It was wrong. End of story.”
“I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“You didn’t. I’m just stating the facts. Why her? I can’t answer. I used poor judgment and allowed her to play on my insecurities.”
“So she pursued you?”
Wishing I wasn’t hearing this conversation, I wonder why she wants to know. Is she interested in him as well?
My father shakes his head. “I’m not going to make excuses for what I did.”
“Fair enough.”
“Olivia, I love my son and there is nothing I wouldn’t do to make up the pain and humiliation I’ve caused him.”
“If that’s true, let’s make certain we’re clear on a few things. I will not be a messenger for you, so please don’t ask again.”
“Agreed.”
“Nor will I be an information source. Any and all interaction between us will be work related. And since we didn’t have any cause for direct contact before you knew about my relationship with Lucas I expect the same to hold true now.”
My chest swells with pride. God I love her. I came to make things better for her, and here she is trying to improve the situation for me.
My father smiles, and strokes her hair gently. “My son is very lucky to have you. I can't express how happy I am for you both.”
Every muscle in my body tenses as I watch him touch her. He’s at it again! I hold back from jumping out and pummeling the old man.
“Thank you, sir,” Olivia smiles sweetly. “And one more thing. Please, don’t touch me. There's no reason for it, and I'm sure nothing good could come of it.”
My father chuckles as she walks away. He stands outside the examining room closest to his office, picks up the file and shakes his head before entering.
I lean against the wall trying to catch my breath. I didn’t get caught and she set my father straight. With my pulse still racing, I don’t know which I am most thankful for. Once I’m certain the hallway is clear, I sneak out of the bathroom and head back to the receptionist.
“Dr. Stillwell seems to be busier than I thought at the moment. I’d still like my visit to be a surprise, so I’d appreciate if you don’t mention I was here.”
"Of course." She smiles.
With a quick look around to be certain Olivia isn’t within eyeshot, I dash out of the office.