~Honestly this little scene is selfishly all for me, but I’m happy to share with you guys. Bax has always been very special to me for a lot of reasons, and for once I am having a really difficult time telling a character goodbye. I really felt like there was no way to end this series without going back to the beginning.
“I remember the first time you brought me here. I couldn’t believe how pretty the Point looked. It was like it was a whole new city looking down on it from so high up.” We were parked up on the high outlook that perched over the city. An old haunt for many reasons, one of which was that it was often quiet and high above the grime and filth of the city. Dovie’s voice was wistful and soft with fondness over the memory of that night.
I remembered it clearly, as well. Probably not for the same reasons she did.
I’d fucked her senseless on the hood of the very car we were leaning against, not even pausing to think about the way our clothes were going to scratch the custom paint job, or the footprints she was going to leave on the meticulously polished chrome bumper. I cared more about her than the car. A first for me. It was the night I realized that if I was ever going to love anybody, it was going to be her. It was also the night I started putting her first, before anything and everyone else, without even realizing it. The car wasn’t even mine anymore. I’d given it to her in a moment of madness, convinced it was the best way to prove to her that she meant everything to me. I wasn’t a hearts and flowers kind of guy, so instead, I handed her the keys to my muscle car.
I didn’t even regret it . . . well, most days I didn’t. When she was late getting the oil changed, and when she ground the gears together because she was moving too fast and excited about something, it made my teeth clench and fingers twitch. But every time she trailed her fingers over the sleek fender or pet the leather interior like it was a living, breathing thing, I knew it was the right call. No one had given Dovie much of anything before I came along, and I’d handed over not only my pride and joy, but my heart, as well. She treated them both like they were priceless.
There was a slight breeze blowing. It made her shiver and tossed one of her strawberry curls in my direction. I caught the rosy strand between my fingers and gave it a gentle tug. The pressure caused her to turn and look at me, and just like always, I wondered how on Earth someone as good as she was could ever lower herself enough to love someone as bad as I was. She gave her heart to the abandoned and neglected kids who littered the city. I chopped up cars and taught guys how to fight for quick cash and peace of mind. We stood on opposite sides of the fence on many things and argued about the regular stupid shit. On paper we were a disaster waiting to happen, but in reality, we made it work. And it was work. We were still very different, and things between us never ceased to be complicated, but all of that was incidental as long as we were standing side by side at the end of the day. Neither one of us could live without the other, so we did whatever we had to in order to keep our unbreakable connection strong. The only thing I’d ever fought for before her was survival. Now I put every ounce of energy I had, every skill I’d ever learned, into keeping Dovie happy and proving to her that no one would ever love her better than I did.
“That was a good night.” I couldn’t keep the appreciative rumble out of my voice, and chuckled when it earned me an elbow in the ribs and an exaggerated eye roll.
I threw an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into the curve of my body when I noticed she was starting to shiver. It never ceased to amaze me how well she fit in that spot. I was convinced I was a guy who was meant to stand on my own, but she’d proven me wrong over and over again. Never in a million years did I think it would be the woman I loved who had my back no matter how dangerous or deadly the situation may be. Dovie was the strongest person I’d ever met, and I was proud I could call her mine.
“I think ‘good’ might be a slight exaggeration.” She snuggled in closer, eyes locked on the lights of the city down below. “You broke my heart a little bit that night, Bax.”
I blew out a breath and wished for a cigarette. I’d done my best to quit over the last few years. She hated that I smoked, told me often she didn’t want to make out with an ashtray, and mentioned she was worried about my health. I’d been marginally successful in kicking the habit. Dovie didn’t ask for much, so when she did, I always tried my best to give her whatever it was she needed from me. I missed having something to do with my hands and often yearned for the soothing effect of nicotine.
I’d stupidly tried to tell her goodbye for good that night. I’d tried to walk away after showing her how beautiful our ugly city could be, and after I’d tried to tell her with my body how important she was to me, because words felt so inadequate. I shattered a special moment; I knew exactly what I was doing when I did it, and it had been in the back of my mind for years that I needed to make it up to her. I wanted all her memories of me to be ones that made her smile, not ones that made her sad.
“I fucked up that night. I knew it then, I remember how awful it felt to let go of you that night.” I put my chin on the top of her head, loving the slide of her soft hair against my skin. “Never again. I won’t ever let you go.” My arm tightened reflexively, locking her in place next to me.
She hummed a little and I felt her arm wind around my waist. I knew if we were facing one another she would reach out and touch the star tattooed high on my cheek, right next to my eye. It was a familiar gesture, one she used to calm herself down. One she used to soothe all the angry, rowdy things inside of me. The tattoo was a mark of rebellion and defiance. She’d turned it into something sweet and comforting, in a way only she could.
“Back then I was still scared of you. I let you push me away. Now, I know better. Sometimes I’m still scared for you, but I know you would die before hurting me. I’m never letting you get away, Bax.” I liked the note of possession in her tone. It was nice to know that even though we’d been together for a while now, she still felt the need to claim me as her own.
“I’ve been telling myself for a long time I needed to make that night up to you, but something always seems to come up.” Annoyance colored my tone because I kept having to adjust my plans. The things that kept cropping up were all good though, so it was hard to be mad at the inconveniences.
The first time I’d tried to bring her up here, my nephew decided it was time to make his way in the world. I was still leery of my big brother since he was a cop through and through, and I was still a criminal down to my very core. But I loved that kid something fierce.
The second time there had been a crisis concerning the flowers for Race and Brysen’s wedding. I still had a hard time believing spoiled, selfish Race was married, but he was, and I watched every single day as he bent over backwards to make sure Brysen lived the best life possible. It wasn’t easy being married to a corrupt king, but somehow, she not only managed, but also brought out the best in Race.
The third time I’d tried to get Dovie up here, Nassir announced that he and Keelyn were adopting a baby and everything stopped so we could congratulate them. One of the girls who worked for Nassir found herself in a bind. She didn’t want to end the pregnancy and she was terrified of the baby going into the system in the Point. No one was sure if it was Nassir’s idea, or his pretty wife’s, to bring the baby home with them; frankly, neither one of them seemed like they were parental material. They were both over the moon about their new addition and everyone was delighting in imagining the Devil as a daddy. The thought of Nassir Gates changing a dirty diaper was enough to make me chuckle every single time I tried to imagine it.
The fourth time I was sure I was going to be able to put my plan into action, but Karsen had called and announced that her new home was finally finished and asked us all to come for an impromptu housewarming party. I felt obligated to go to keep Race and Booker from tearing into each other, something that still happened frequently, even though the two men had technically called a truce.
And finally, the last time I’d tried to get her up here for a redo of that night, Stark surprised me by asking for my help in tracking down a Tesla for Noe. He wanted to surprise her for their anniversary, but like the absentminded genius he was, he didn’t stop to consider there was a waiting list for the damn car and he couldn’t simply pick one up willy-nilly. Of course, I wasn’t going to let him down, so I’d had to call in a favor or ten in order to make it happen, which took up more time than I thought it would.
However, tonight it was finally just me and Dovie. I’d been waiting for this moment for what felt like forever.
Dovie laughed, the sound light and airy in the night. She was happy. I made her happy. It was my greatest accomplishment.
“Are you going to bend me over the hood of the Super Bee again?” She tilted her head back and wiggled her rust-colored eyebrows at me. “I could get on board with that plan if you’re very persuasive. It’s a little colder tonight than it was when we were up here before.”
I snorted out a laugh and bent my head so I could touch my lips to hers. She tasted like vanilla from her lip-gloss, and something even sweeter that was all Dovie.
“I’m hoping you might want to bend me over the Super Bee when it’s all said and done.” She pulled back at my cryptic words, eyebrows dancing upward. I kissed the tip of her nose and gently turned her around so we were both facing the city down below once again. I smoothed a hand down her spine and told her softly, “I love our life together, no matter how unconventional parts of it may be. You’ve never complained, never even hinted that it would be so much easier for you if you fell in love with someone else. You are perfect for me in every way, and I want to be someone who is also perfect for you. That’s hard, because I’m pretty sure there has never been a more imperfect man than me.”
She immediately started to shake her head in denial, but I caught a handful of her wild hair and kept her head still, forcing her to keep her eyes on the dim city in the horizon. She always accepted me for exactly who I was, faults and all. She never asked me to change, never demanded I give her more than I was capable of giving. She understood my limitations, but I wanted to be the guy who broke boundaries for her. I wanted to be the man who pushed every single day to be better for her.
“Everyone around us is adding these normal, simple things into their lives. Getting married, having kids, building houses, and creating families. They’re mundane things most people would take for granted, but they mean so much in a place like the Point. You’ve never asked me to give you normal, never hinted how much you would appreciate something as basic as a wedding ring.”
“Bax . . .” My name always sounded special when she said it. I could hear a quiver in her voice and her entire body stiffened where she was partially leaning against me.
“You asked me once if I could live for you, because dying here is so damn easy. I do. Every single day I live for you. For your smile. For your laugh. For the way you touch my face. I live for the way you love me, and for the way you take me as I come. I never imagined I would be around long enough to build a life with someone, but here we are. It’s you and me forever, and the very least I can give you is a piece of normal that ties you to me forever.” I was shocked to feel my hand shake when I removed it from her hair.
Nervously I wiped my sweaty palms down the front of my jeans and watched as a sequence of lights started to flicker and come to life on all the buildings and high-rises out in the distance. I took a deep breath and stepped in front of the woman who was now crying, hands over her mouth as she watched the words ‘Will You Marry Me’ illuminate across the city which had brought us together and tried it’s very best to rip us apart. I owed both Nassir and Stark a million favors for helping me pull this off. The look on Dovie’s face right now was worth every single illicit deed either might ask me to do in the future.
The tears on her freckled cheeks glistened in the moonlight, and her heart was in her eyes as she watched me dig the ring I’d been carting around for months out of my pocket.
It was a simple ring. Nothing flashy or ostentatious that would draw undo attention to her or put her at risk when she was on the streets without me. I knew she wouldn’t want anything too big or bulky, and there was no way a diamond would do. So, I got her an emerald set in a platinum band surrounded by onyx. Her eyes were green, mine were nearly black. It would be a constant reminder of the two of us together on her finger every time she looked down.
“The only person I could ever promise forever to is you, Dovie. I want to marry you.” I really did, and no one was more shocked by the fact than me. “Say yes . . . please.” I didn’t want to ask her, because if for some reason she said no . . . I wasn’t sure what I would do.
She stared at me for a long minute, eyes locked on mine as they gleamed with tears. This time, when her smile broke free, I felt it like a punch to the gut. It was brighter than the sun and full of so much happiness and hope it nearly knocked me on my ass.
A second later she threw herself at me, arms locking around my neck in a stranglehold as she whispered ‘yes’ over and over again into my ear. I wrapped my arms around her and buried my face in the curve of her neck, relief flooding through me in crashing waves. I was going to do this. I was going to marry this woman and give her my last name.
“Who would have ever imagined Shane Baxter as a romantic?” She kissed me on the cheek and then moved so she could touch her lips to mine. “This is perfect, Bax. You are perfect.”
No, I wasn’t. Far from it. But the fact she believed it, well, it proved I needed to officially make her mine. I kissed her back, lips searching and tongues tangling. When I pulled back, I smiled at her as she lifted her fingers to gently brush the backs of them over the star inked on my face. “Tonight is a good night, Copper Top.”
Sighing dreamily, she kissed me again and demanded, “Make love to me. I never want to forget this moment.”
We forgot about the cold. I forgot about the car. The only thing that mattered was the girl who was meant to be mine.
If you want to check out the rest of the point go here!