WHITE SANDS CARESS my bare toes, feeling as soft and warm as tiny silken diamonds. I lift my head to the sky, my eyes closing tightly against the intensity of the sun, and take a deep, cleansing breath. The air is so fresh, so clear. My lungs expand gratefully and take in as much as possible. It feels good…so good to breathe.
My lips curl into the most genuine smile I’ve worn in months. My cheeks almost ache with the nearly foreign movement. But I smile through it. It’s a welcomed ache. Just as the bright, intense sun delivers a delightful burn, I relish in the sensation. It makes me feel vital. And happy. Finally happy.
Crystal blue waves crash against large boulders in the distance. A breeze strokes my face and hair, ruffling my white sundress. My skin is flawless and clear, no remains of brutality anywhere to be found. I smile again. Maybe I can be beautiful here. Maybe scars don’t exist in this place. Maybe there are no broken spirits or crushed hearts. Just peace and bliss. Two things I never thought I’d ever truly achieve again. Two things that were ripped from me at only twenty years old.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” an incredibly smooth voice coos from beside me.
I turn my head towards the voice, a voice I know as well as my own. A voice that has whispered anecdotes of love and adoration while warm, strong arms held me tight. A voice that could melt away all the fear and anxiety I’ve ever felt with just a simple ‘I love you.’ The only voice I have ever wanted to hear.
“It is,” I smile at him. “So beautiful.”
Dorian’s eyes sparkle against the backdrop of seawater and cloudless blue sky. His full lips curl up on one side as he gazes at me adoringly. “Only because you’re here.” He moves a curl from my face, tucking it behind my ear. I turn into his warm touch.
“Mmmm,” I hum. “Where am I?”
He brushes my cheek, his other hand finding mine. “Home.”
I smile at the word and turn back into the gorgeous view of stone mountains, endless aquamarine, and distant clay houses. “Home.”
We sit in perfectly comfortable silence for a long moment, enjoying the smell of saltwater and the feel of cool wind whipping through our loose clothing. I dig my toes deeper into the soft sand. I nearly giggle as the tiny granules tickle my sensitive digits.
“Will you stay with me?” I ask in a small voice, still gazing out at the water.
I feel Dorian shift beside me. “If you want me to.”
“For how long?” I turn to face him, my expression free from worry and doubt.
“However long it takes.”
Satisfied with his response, I scoot next to him and rest my head on his shoulder. Dorian wraps his arm around me in response, holding me close to him. I turn into the bare skin of his neck and breathe in his sweet, alluring scent. It feels me with euphoria, and my body relaxes even more.
“I’m not afraid,” I whisper, letting my eyes close for a moment and enjoying his closeness.
His lips are in my hair. “I’m glad. You shouldn’t be afraid ever again.”
I sigh with contentment. “I’ve missed you.”
“Little girl, I’ve missed you more than you could ever imagine.”
“So stay,” I murmur against the fabric of his white shirt. “Stay with me.”
Dorian’s lips brush my forehead. “I’ll never leave you again.”
We sit for several minutes, maybe hours, watching the waves collide with the giant jagged rocks until the sky begins to darken. Before night falls upon us completely, I turn to him. “I have to go, don’t I?”
“Yes.”
I nod, understanding washing through me. “Will you come with me?”
I see Dorian smile in the dimming light, his eyes shimmering and luminescent. “I can’t. But I’ll be waiting for you.” His hands come up to cup my face and he brushes away tears I didn’t even know were there. He leans forward and presses his soft lips on my forehead. Then they caress each cheek. When his warm lips finally meet mine, I instantly melt into his touch. Sensation rips through me, spiking my heart rate and stirring the butterflies in my stomach from hibernation. When he pulls away, I see a single, glistening tear roll down his cheek.
“Close your eyes,” he whispers.
I take in his beauty once more before steeling myself to do as he says. I’m not afraid. I’m not nervous. I just don’t want to end this. I don’t want to lose him again. But I know what I must do. I know that this is the only way. So with a deep, calming breath, I press my lips against his once more, close my eyes, and cross over to the other side.
AIR FILLS MY lungs in a rush, so much so that I almost feel high with oxygen. My wide open eyes dart around frantically, looking for any sign of familiarity as my rigid hands grip the slick fabric underneath me. I know this place. The satin comforter, the black and gold motif, the smell of rainwater and fresh linen. I’ve been here before.
Dorian’s suite.
As if he could hear my realization, he’s at my side, cradling my head. “How do you feel?” he asks, concern etched on his troubled face. His blue eyes twinkle in the dim light flooding from the en suite bathroom.
Immediately, my concern goes to my debilitating injuries. I stretch my hand in front of me, expecting to see mangled flesh and bone. It’s perfectly fine, and I wiggle each digit, ensuring full mobility. My hand touches the back of my head. I can feel knots of dried, caked blood yet there is no gash. Not even a touch of soreness where the wound would have been. My lungs and neck feel fine, no trace of labored, shallow breathing. And the pain…it’s gone. I look to Dorian with a puzzled, borderline panicked, look.
“What happened? I was…he had me…I thought,” I stammer, clutching my chest. I realize it’s draped in feather-light silk, not tattered, bloodied rags. “Was it a dream?”
Dorian shakes his head solemnly, grasping my hands in his. His thumb traces small circles around my anchor mark. “No. It wasn’t.”
Fear and confusion grip me, causing Dorian to pull me closer. “What happened to me?” I whisper.
Tension rolls off him in waves and his jaw begins to tick wildly. Though his body has stiffened, his hands are still gentle and calming as they stroke mine. “The Enchanter captured and tortured you. You lost a lot of blood. You suffered several broken bones, including a punctured lung and crushed cervical vertebrae.”
I frown. So it wasn’t a dream. I remember all of those things happening. I felt every broken bone and gaping wound. I could taste and smell the iron of mass amounts of blood loss in the air. I remember my fear and desperation. “But…I’m fine. What happened? How could all of that have happened, yet I’m here with you, unharmed?” I think back to just minutes before, to my vision on the beach of Skiathos. The wind whipping through my white dress. The smell of seawater. The feel of the sun’s golden warmth…
“Oh my God, Dorian,” I say in a horrified whisper. “Am I dead?”
He looks away, avoiding my tear-filled gaze as he battles his own emotions. “You were.”
“And…now?” It suddenly dawns on me that it’s completely dark outside. I try to pull away to stand but Dorian has a firm hold on my hands. “Oh no, what time is it?”
“10pm. The fourteenth.”
So I haven’t ascended. I sigh with relief, but only for a split second. I still don’t know what I am. I don’t even know if I’m still dreaming. Or if I’m… “So I’m not dead?” I choke out, my throat suddenly as dry as chalk. “Is this an illusion?”
Dorian looks back to me, a slight frown puckering his forehead. “No, little girl.”
I open my mouth to speak, the questions bombarding me all at once. I decide to go with the most obvious question. “How?”
He swallows slowly, the movement of his throat captivating my gaze. Then he cups my cheeks with his warm, soft hands. Hands I haven’t felt on my body in way too long. “I felt you. I felt your pain, your fear. It crippled me. That feeling of pure dread filled me, stole my breath, and brought me to my knees. I had to come to you. I had to save you.”
His thumbs brush tiny circles on the apples of my cheeks as he takes a calming breath. His beautiful endless blue eyes freeze over, becoming distant and cold. “I found you just as that bastard crushed your neck in his hands. I heard it, and it was the most terrifying sound I have ever heard. I felt the life slip away from your body. I saw you lying there ghostly white and limp.”
His bottom lip trembles ever so lightly before he sucks it into his mouth, digging his teeth in it and taking a deep breath. “And I did to him what he wanted to do to you. I slaughtered him until he was nothing more than a pathetic speck of dust. I wanted to do more. I wanted everyone he has ever known to suffer. He took away the only thing I cared about. The only person I have ever loved. He took my reason to live.”
A hand brushes away a few tangles that have fallen in my face. “I kneeled over your lifeless body and I sobbed. I felt myself break into a million pieces. Losing you completely shattered me and I wanted to die, Gabriella. I wanted to die with you because living without you isn’t an option for me.”
His eyes begin to well up with tears, matching my own. I don’t even breathe as his pained grimace turns into a hopeful half-smile. “So I did something I hadn’t done for centuries. I prayed. I wailed out to the Divine, begging him to help me. Asking the he take me instead and leave you to live a happy life. I screamed and cried until I had no voice left, until the sobs tearing through me made my body ache. All the while, I kept trying to save you. Kept trying to heal you. I couldn’t accept that you were gone. I couldn’t.”
He pauses, his eyes searching my face for reaction. All I can do is look at him in disbelief. Dorian leans forward and rests his forehead against mine. We sit there for several long moments, soaking in the closeness, before he speaks again. “I don’t know how, but I healed you,” he whispers, his cool breath washing over my skin. “Don’t you see? My love for you is so deep and so strong that the Divine heard my cries. Felt my excruciating pain. And something within, something that had been dead inside me awakened. And I healed you.”
He pulls back just a fraction to press his lips against mine. “I love you,” he says between feather-light kisses. “So much, Gabriella. I love you so much.”
He kisses every inch of my face, yet I am too shell-shocked by his account to reciprocate. I died? Dorian saved me? Then I was on a beach in Skiathos? It all doesn’t seem real to me. Like a fuzzy, bootleg version of Inception…a dream within a dream. Yet while the view may be hazy, the memory of the pain- the excruciating ache throughout my entire body- is crystal clear. I remember the agony, the desperation. The unrelenting fear that consumed the fight in me. The sudden need to survive it all though I knew I couldn’t.
“I was in Skiathos. On a beach. With you,” I say, trying to make sense of it all.
“Yes,” he replies, a ghost of a smile on his lips. “I gave you that illusion while your body healed. I didn’t want you to feel any more pain. And I didn’t want you to be alone.”
“Thank you.”
My eyes search Dorian’s hopeful face, taking in the sight of his relief. Then I spy his attire, all thoughts of hope leaving me. I push against his chest a bit to put some distance between our bodies. “Are you wearing…a tuxedo?” My eyes grow wide at his stoic silence. “Oh my God, Dorian, you did it, didn’t you? You married her.” His tailored black dress slacks, crimson-stained white dress shirt, and unraveled bow tie say it all. He was at his wedding.
Dorian shakes his head, releasing a breath. “No. I didn’t. I couldn’t. I felt how badly you needed me. I knew I had to come to you. I left her…at the alter.”
Relief creeps in but I quickly push it away in exchange for skepticism. “But if I hadn’t been in trouble, if you hadn’t felt those things from me, you would have done it, right? You would have married her.”
Aggravation flashes across his face, colliding with the visible regret spilling from his eyes. He can’t lie. And his silence tells me everything I need to know.
“That’s what I thought,” I mumble, pulling away from him altogether.
Dorian tries to recapture my hands but doesn’t fight against my refusal to let him. “Gabriella, I need you to understand what this marriage would have meant to me. It would have given me the influence- the power- to end my father. Once the throne was mine, I had planned to kill him. I couldn’t tell you that because, as you know, my thoughts and words were not safe. There’s no reason to hide this from you now. I’m as good as dead. I’ve committed my final act of treason by walking out on that mockery of a wedding.” He smiles weakly but it translates as a grimace.
I nod, soaking it all in. “So all of this…was just a trick? To get to Stavros?” Part of me knew. But after all the lies and deceit and half-truths, I just couldn’t follow my instincts. I want to believe that Dorian has always been completely honest with me but the truth is he hasn’t. He’s fed me too many betrayals. Betrayals that were eclipsed by my love for him.
“It was. And to be rid of Aurora. I had planned to imprison her. Strip her of all her power and leave her with just enough to exist…”
“Petrify her,” I whisper, speaking of the same punishment that still haunts him.
“Yes,” he nods. “But none of that matters now. I had to come to you. There’s no way I could go through with all that while you were suffering.” He runs his hands up and down my bare, unmarred arms, igniting pleasurable goosebumps on my skin.
I let myself relax under his touch, my body fighting fatigue from the day’s events. The thought brings me up short and my eyes snap to Dorian’s. Without thinking, my hands are on his face, pulling it within inches of mine. His eyes close reflexively as if expecting me to kiss him, and as much as I want to- need to- I know there is so much more that we have to discuss.
“Why do you look…fine? You still look like yourself. Not tired or weak.” I stretch the taut skin on his high cheek bones, looking for any sign of wrinkles or dark circles.
He shakes his head in my grip. “The Enchanter was easy enough to defeat. He was too distracted by you to put up much of a fight. I acquired his power then destroyed him. Light energy has its…perks. I didn’t want to take it, but I knew I needed it if I were to try to save you.”
I release his face from my hands and let them slide to his sculpted shoulders, resting my forehead against his. “I have to go,” I say just above a whisper. “I don’t know what I am gonna do, but I have to go.”
“I know,” he replies matching my tone. “I won’t tell you how to choose. I can’t. But know that whatever side you align to, whichever way you ascend, I love you.” My bottom lip quivers before Dorian soothes it with the sweetest, softest kiss. “I know you’ll do what is right. I know you’ll make Alex and Natalia proud. They loved you so much. Maybe even as much as I do,” he says with a chuckle.
Through my confusion and fear, a smile curls my trembling lips. “Thank you.”
After one last chaste kiss, he pulls away. “I’ll give you some privacy to clean up. All your clothes and toiletries are still here. I never got rid of them. I expected…both of us to be back soon.”
I smile as he exits the room then make my way to the bathroom to shower and wash out the matted blood in my hair. I feel an overwhelming gratitude to Dorian for changing me out of my ripped, bloodied clothing. He must’ve known the sight alone would have raised even more turmoil in my head.
I wash and dress on autopilot, my thoughts completely consumed with my last moments on Earth as a somewhat normal, human girl. I’ve lived a good life. I’ve been blessed with good friends and great parents. By aligning with the Dark, I would be going against all they have taught me. I would be playing right into Stavros’s hands. And now that Dorian has gone against his wishes, I am almost certain that our deal is off. He would have no reason to uphold his end of the bargain.
Then again, the Light have proven to be just as cunning and deceitful. I can’t blame their entire race for the acts of one but Xavier has clearly shown me just what they are capable of. They can be evil, menacing and murderous. They are no better than the Dark in that respect.
I make my way out of the bedroom and spot Dorian at the French doors, looking out into the night, a glass of scotch clutched in his palm. The sight tugs at my heartstrings and I fight the impulse to wrap my arms around him from behind like I had done so many times before. He would tell me all the wonders that the darkness revealed as I trailed kisses on his back before resting my cheek against it, taking in his exotic freshness. It would be so easy to slip back into that habit. Being with him, showing him that affection that he craves so much, would be as effortless as breathing.
“I called Chris and Donna,” Dorian says before turning to face me. His expression is cautious, and a little bit sad. “I went there before I found you and told them what I felt. I promised I would do any and everything to save you. I nearly had to restrain Chris from coming with me but I couldn’t risk him getting hurt. I told them you would call once you had a chance.”
“Thank you.” I stop just a few feet from him, unsure of where we stand. But I can’t think about that right now. My thoughts are reserved solely for what is to come in the next hour.
Dorian fishes something out of his pocket and extends his palm, revealing a set of keys. “Here, take my car. Yours is still in front of your store.”
I take the keys from him with a shaky hand, now even more nervous about driving his ridiculously expensive sports car. “Thanks. I didn’t realize you still had it here.”
“I told you that I had intended to come back. All of my things are here. But most importantly, you’re here. I wasn’t lying when I said I couldn’t be without you.”
I nod, clutching the keys to my chest. I don’t know how I should respond. I have a major decision to make and I don’t want to give him false hope in case it doesn’t go the way he wants. Hell, I don’t even know how it’s going to go. But it will be midnight soon and I can’t run from that. I can’t escape my destiny, no matter what it entails.
On slightly wobbly legs, I make my way to the door, leaving Dorian at the French doors watching me intently. I turn towards him just before he is out of my eyesight.
“Dorian,” I say in a quiet voice, though I know he can hear me. “I’ll be back. I don’t know for what. I can’t be sure if it will be as your friend or your foe, but I’ll be back. Thank you…for everything. For saving me. And for loving me.”
One corner of his mouth curls into a smirk. “Why does this feel like goodbye?”
I shrug, feeling the distance between us growing wider and wider with every passing second towards my ascension. “Because maybe it is goodbye. Or maybe it’s something else entirely. Maybe it’s forever. I don’t know.”
And with that, I turn on my heel and exit the suite, wondering if I’ve seen the last of the man I love. The Warlock who opened me in a way that no one else could, and showed me all the wonders of the world through hauntingly ice blue eyes.
I pull into the abandoned, dark parking lot of Garden of the Gods and kill the engine. I have twenty minutes to spare so I take the few quiet moments to contemplate my next move. I know I’ve had a year to prepare for this moment, and honestly, I thought my mind was made up. Even with the knowledge of what the Light and Dark were originally created for, my interpretation of them was pretty black and white. But the last twelve hours have completely shattered that decision. It’s not only created grey areas, it has made me doubt any and everything I’ve ever learned about them. How can I choose one when I am still so tied to the other?
My tortured thoughts are interrupted by a sensation crawling up my arms and legs. It’s not the prickles of pleasure that Dorian gives me. It’s not even the creeping, tingling feeling that indicates that danger is near, causing the fine hairs on my arms to stand at attention. It’s something else entirely. Like a burning coldness that singes the surface of my skin, stripping off the very top layer. It doesn’t hurt but it isn’t exactly pleasant either.
I take a moment to absorb it all, holding my arms in front of me to look for any visible change. Even in almost complete darkness, I can see every line and pore in my skin. I can hear the tiny pelts of rainwater falling silently on the windshield, even smell them in the light breeze. And I can feel the shift in the Earth’s atmosphere, indicating that an extreme surge of power is on the horizon. It’s time. It’s time for me to cross over into the unknown and embrace eternity.
I step out into the chilly dampness of the night and take a deep breath before beginning my trek. Ascending here at Garden of the Gods just made sense when I planned it weeks ago. I had always marveled at the fascinating rock formations and thought of them as somewhat supernatural even long before I even knew the Light and Dark existed. And now that I have an idea of all that is out there, coupled with its name, I am almost certain that paranormal activity played a part in its creation.
Then there’s the most obvious reason for its significance: Garden of the Gods is the place where Dorian and I shared our first kiss. Though our future together is murkier than ever- hell, my future is murkier than ever- I will hold that memory close to me. It was a happy time. I don’t want to lose sight of those moments in fear that I may never feel happiness like that again.
I stop at a tall, sandstone structure with a flat surface and with one last calming breath, I begin my climb. It’s pitch black out but I can see perfectly. Even the climb is almost too easy, which brings a tiny smile to my tense face. I’ve never been really athletic but right now I feel like I could climb Pike’s Peak.
The rain begins to pick up just as I reach the top, shifting from a light mist to a moderate downpour. My hair has already begun to curl and stick to my face and back yet I make no move to seek refuge. I know what is coming and if what Dorian has told me is correct, it could very well get much worse. I close my eyes and tilt my head to the sky. Maybe it’s him who is actually making it rain right now. Maybe this is his way of being with me through all of this.
Lightning slices through the sky so bright that I yelp in surprise. Deafening thunder immediately follows it, indicating the storm’s close proximity. The heavens open completely, rain pouring down in a sheet so thick that I feel as if I’m submerged in water. The static in the air meets the cold burning sensation still attacking my skin with millions of tiny shocks. I hold my hands in front of me, looking at the miniscule volts glowing on my skin with rapt fascination. This is happening. This is really happening. And instead of being afraid or confused, I feel absolutely enlightened and secure. Like this is totally natural. This ethereal feeling just seems right.
Bolts of white hot lightning dart from the sky, scorching the earth around me. Sparks fall over me like electric rain, illuminating the haunting shadows created by the huge sandstone boulders. The earsplitting boom caused by the constant thunder sounds more like a roar mixed with the howling winds. Everything around me rumbles and shakes, yet I stand tall, fierce and completely unmovable.
There is no little girl here. She no longer exists. That girl has grown, has lived, has loved and has lost. She has been broken and beaten. She has been hurt and mended. And now she is free. Free to be everything that she was destined to be.
The numerous bolts of ominous lightning inch closer and closer, only a few feet standing between them and my stock-still form. I don’t even recoil. I simply stand and wait, welcoming the surge of power I know they will deliver. Rain still falls around me, drenching me to my bones yet I don’t even feel the slightest chill.
In ceremonious fashion, I lift my head back up to the sky and give myself over to my supernatural senses as I make my internal declaration. As I pledge my allegiance to the side that I wish to be tied to for eternity. The side that I will live, fight and eventually die for. I want that magic to fill me to the brim. I want to be engulfed in that overwhelming power. I want to be the magic, just as my mother, Natalia, intended for me to be. I hope I make her proud. I hope she is somewhere looking down at me with joyful tears in her beautiful golden eyes as she clutches my father’s hand. I hope he, too, is smiling at me with pride etched in his magnificent face.
I am not sure if time stops, or slows tremendously, but as the first bolt of lightning pierces me, everything suddenly pauses. Every raindrop freezes to a halt, looking like a million congealed jewels suspended in the air. The strong gusts of wind die, not even whisper of a howl to be heard. Everything around me is completely silent and still. Another strikes me, lighting every cell in my body on fire with its intense current. I gasp at the feeling yet no cries escape my lips. It’s…jolting, just like Donna said it would be. I smile through the odd sensation, my thoughts now on my adopted parents as the third bolt zaps me. They will never again have to be afraid. They’ll never have to worry about me again. It’s my turn to protect them. My turn to show them that twenty-one years of sacrifice was worth it.
The lightning flies down in a seamless blur, shocking my body from every angle and causing me to writhe and convulse with the intensity. It continues for several minutes, or maybe hours, I can’t be completely sure. There is no sense of time in this realm where all other life is frozen. But as the last strike rocks my entire frame and brings me to my knees, I know no time has passed at all. Life returns yet the tumultuous rain and wind cease. The lightning and thunder have also dissipated. All is still in the night. And I can see all of it. I embrace it. I thrive in the looming darkness as if this is my natural element.
A scared, bemused girl came here, not knowing who and what she was. Unsure of the path she should choose. Uncertain of what her place was amongst the violence, rage and turmoil between two ancient enemy forces.
Now a goddess emerges, leaving behind the confusion that kept her bound with anxiety. She was made for this. She was chosen to undo the wrongs that have plagued this world and beyond. To bridge the gap between the Light Enchanters and Dark Ones and a tainted history of conflict. Her parents died so she could live and achieve her destiny. A destiny to be great, to be fearless. A destiny to be utterly extraordinary.