SEEING THE WORLD through brand new eyes is almost jarring. Hell, have I been blind for twenty-one years? Even the way I walk, the way I move, is different. It’s not so much that I’m afraid that I’ll move unnaturally fast, it’s keeping myself planted on the ground that seems to be the real feat. It seems easier to somewhat ghost to where I want to be. To think of a spot and somehow manifest there. Now I realize how much restraint Dorian had been using just to appear normal.
I walk down the cobblestone path, my head snapping at every creak and rustle of the leaves. It’s not so much hearing as it is knowing. Like an instinctual force within me that knows what is there without truly hearing or seeing it. It’s as if all my senses have combined and I’ve become somewhat omnipresent. Yet I still feel normal. I still feel like me. Yeah, the superhuman senses and the way my eyes and fingertips seem to constantly tingle is a bit weird, but for the most part, I am still Gabs. New & improved Gabs. Gabs 2.0. But still Gabs.
I step off the familiar elevator without hesitance and face the double doors. I know what I’ve come here for. My once clouded, jaded mind is now crystal clear. No amount of influence from him or anyone else can dissuade me from this. The truth is screaming at me and I can’t ignore it any longer. I can’t continue to live a lie.
I face the doors, contemplating my next move. Do I just bust in, guns blazing? Should I knock? Would he even answer, especially if he knew what I am? Can’t he already sense the power rolling off of me in iridescent waves? Damn, I really am me. I still can’t make up my mind.
The door swings open, disrupting me from my thoughts, though I expect it. I heard the footprints lightly padding across the carpet. I smelled the cool freshness of his skin. I heard his heart hammering with nervous expectation as I approached. I could even taste his flavor on my tongue. He knew I’d be coming for him. He knew this moment was inevitable.
“Gabriella,” Dorian breathes, a hint of desperation in his usually smooth voice. I watch as his brilliant blue eyes take me in, a myriad of vibrant emotions displayed clearly on his face. From relief to confusion to shock to horror to fear, every one of his reactions do not go unnoticed by my skillful eyes. I know what he sees, and I know what that must mean for him. For us. But this is what I have chosen. And honestly, there was no other choice.
“Dorian,” I reply confidently with a slight nod of my head.
He swallows, my eyes studying the movements of his throat and the rapid pulsing of his jugular. He’s nervous. Even a bit afraid of me. I know because I can feel it. I can feel every one of his emotions just as he can feel mine. My ascension has brought our link full circle.
“What have you done?” he rasps, his eyes growing wide. “How? How did you… Why?”
I lick my lips, though they feel as smooth as silk under my tongue. “Let me in so I can tell you.”
Uncertainty furrows his brow and he looks away, contemplating his next move. After a beat, he steps aside, realizing that I would make my way inside no matter what he decided. His eyes stay trained on me, taking on the icy glaze reserved for hostile threats. Once I cross the threshold, I spin around, faster than even he can probably detect.
“You can relax, Dorian. I won’t attack you from behind,” I smirk, giving back the same words he spoke to me the day I found out who and what he is. “It’s not my style.”
The look of sheer disbelief mars his gorgeous face, his jaw dropping in surprise. He quickly closes it and composes himself, ushering me through to the living room with a wave of his hand. I take the liberty to make myself comfortable on the couch, totally at ease with what I am about to do. I don’t even have to think about it. I know there’s only one solution and I don’t want to waste time dancing around it.
“Sit with me,” I say, patting the cushion beside me.
With masked hesitance, Dorian complies, yet stays a good two feet away from me, his cold, calculating eyes still focused on mine, no doubt predetermining my next move. We spend long moments sizing up the other with rapt awareness. I had always known Dorian was absolutely beautiful. Yet seeing him now, being able to unveil the mask he wears for the world is really a sight to behold. He is powerful, terrifying and magnificent. It still hurts to look at him, but in a different way entirely. He’s trying to keep me out. Trying to keep up the façade to protect himself, yet he can’t deny me access. His anxiety is my anxiety. I am more powerful than he is, and effortlessly tear down the barriers that he struggles to put up to hide his true form.
“Why?” he finally whispers, giving up on trying to delay his fate.
I smile. “There was no other option. I knew what I had to do. I know what I was made for. It’s this. This is why I was created,” I say.
Dorian shakes his head and looks away, unable to stand the sight of me. “But it’s impossible. It’s not supposed to be like this.”
Before he can turn his head back, I am beside him, clutching his face between my hands. He gasps and nearly recoils at the contact.
“But don’t you see? It is supposed to be like this. This is what was meant for me all along. I am half Dark and half Light equally. Both good and evil. I was meant to rule the night and the day. And that’s what I am going to do.” I give him a reassuring smile. “It’s ok. I’m ok, Dorian. I was meant to be both. I was never supposed to choose.”
His eyes never leave mine, searching for some semblance of rationality. “But your…eyes.”
I shrug, dropping my hands from his face and grasping his hands instead. He jerks a bit at first, still growing accustomed to the prickles I give him. “Yeah, that will take some getting used to. One blue and one gold eye isn’t exactly normal, is it? It kinda scared the shit out of me.”
Dorian finally cracks the faintest of smiles. “So you’re…ok? You’re not hurt? You’re not…different?”
“Well, other than the eyes, do I look different?”
His eyes begin their study at the crown of my head, my semi-wet hair in a tangled, curly mess that oddly seems perfectly styled and intentional. He takes in the luminescent skin stretched over my high cheekbones, and my full pouty lips that part reflexively with his notice. Then his eyes are on collarbone, traveling down to where my wet shirt clings to my round, heavy breasts.
“Yes,” he breathes, a smile curling his succulent lips. “You are absolutely breathtaking. Even more so than before because you finally know it. You finally see what I’ve seen in you all along.”
I beam at him, relief flooding my chest. I lift his hands and brush them with my lips. This time, he barely flinches. “I have never been more certain of what I was created for, Dorian. I’m not supposed to be solely Light or Dark. I was made to be the Dark Light. Once I accepted that, everything just clicked into place. I didn’t question it anymore.”
I brush his cheek with my hand, trying to be as gentle as possible. He instinctively lets his eyes close and nuzzles into the touch. “And I didn’t question you anymore. You have sacrificed so much for me. You gave up everything you knew- your family, your life… for me. For love.”
“Yes,” he rasps, his voice thick with emotion.
“I know that now, and I thank you.” I inch forward, closing the small distance between our bodies. “Let me do that for you. Let me protect you and sacrifice for you. Let me show you what it is like for someone to care for you and want to keep you safe against all odds. Let me love you like you love me.”
Doubt puckers the space between his brows. “You would do that for me?”
I stifle the giggle in my throat and shake my head before resting it against his forehead. “When are you going to realize that I am stupid, crazy in love with you? That I never stopped loving you? That I simply cannot live another day without you? Didn’t you know? The Dark die for love. I think I inherited that trait from my dad’s side.”
“I think I did hear that somewhere,” he chuckles. “So this is it? This is what you really want?”
I lift my face to study his features. I didn’t realize it before but Dorian has been scared this entire time that we’ve been together. Since the day we met, he has had to fight against his nature, to try to go against what has been engrained in him from birth. Stepping out on faith- on love- has been as terrifying for him as it has been for me. Yet he did it anyway. He loved me in spite of it all.
“Dorian, I’ve tried to be as human as I could possibly be. I’ve tried to embrace the ways of the Light like my mother wanted me to. I even tried to accept that I may very well be Dark. I have done everything that people wanted me to. I’ve rejected what I have wanted because I thought that was what I was supposed to do.” I take a deep breath and beam at the exotic Warlock in front of me, letting conviction shine through every pore. “Hell yes, this is what I want. You are what I want. I know what it meant for you to come to my rescue. I know what that fate entails for you. And now it’s my turn. Now I want to show you what it means to be loved unconditionally.”
I turn over his hand displaying the tiny blue anchor that matches my own. “We’re anchored, Dorian. Not by an impulse. Not by a curse. But by love. And I’m ready to fight for that love. I’m ready to fight for you.”
I only have a split second to take in his awe-filled expression, his eyes glazed and full of ardor before I am on my back, his weight crushing me into the couch cushion. Our mouths waste no time reuniting, our tongues and breaths conjoining simultaneously. His kiss is nothing like I had remembered. It’s better. So much so that I moan against his lips. I can actually taste the depth of his affection for me. I feel how much I mean to him with just the slide of his fingertips against my skin. I can see how much I affect him even with tightly closed eyes.
Dorian pulls away, yet stays situated on top of me. His fingers rake through my wild curls as he smiles down at me adoringly. “I am going to love you for eternity. I know we have adversity stacked against us but I promise to always fight and protect you. I’ll never give up on you. On us. It’s just me and you. This is our destiny. I love you, little girl.”
I bite my bottom lip and smile, gazing up at him with sultry, hooded eyes. Then without even thinking about, I instinctively let the words fall from my lips in the language that we now both share. The ancient language of the Dark that now comes as natural to me as breathing.
“I love you too, Dorian. Forever.”