CHAPTER FOUR
Jacqueline
After Ryan disappeared to take a shower, I stood awkwardly in his living room. I looked around, taking in the lack of furniture and unpacked boxes. Ryan didn’t have a lot of possessions, but it was strange to see the apartment so empty.
I knew I should sit down on the couch to wait for him, but I couldn’t bring myself to move. Our interaction felt so forced and uncomfortable. It was good to see him, but I didn’t realize how weird it would be after all these years.
Finally, I forced myself to sit down and wait for him. I nestled into the couch cushions and sipped my water, not sure what to think. Seeing Ryan again was nice, but he was nothing like the boy I remembered. With Bradley, I saw the changes in him each time he returned home on leave. With Ryan, it felt like I blinked and he became this man. This man who was incredibly attractive. When I saw him outside, I felt sure I had the wrong apartment. The tall, muscular man standing in front of me couldn’t possibly be Ryan Link.
But it was. My shock and discomfort were quickly replaced with joy. It felt great to see him. I just wished it hadn’t been nine years since we were last in the same place. As I sat on the couch, Ryan’s bedroom door opened, and he called out to me.
“What do you feel like for lunch?” he asked. “I was thinking burgers.”
He opened the door so I could hear him, but it allowed me to see inside his room. He was wearing nothing but a towel, and his bare chest glistened with water from the shower. I stared pointedly up at the ceiling before I answered.
“Sure,” I said. “That sounds good.”
“There’s also a really good Mexican place around the corner,” he suggested. “I can’t remember. Do you like Mexican food?”
“Not really,” I answered. “Burgers sound good.”
“Okay, burgers it is,” he said brightly. “We’ll hit the diner down the street.”
My attention was still focused on the ceiling. I wished he would hurry up and get dressed so I wouldn’t have to keep my neck craned upward. I wasn’t the kind of person who engaged in conversations with half-naked men. My face felt flushed.
“What are you looking at?” Ryan asked, his voice sounding much closer now.
I looked down to see him standing in the doorway, fully clothed. My cheeks burned, and I smiled to cover my discomfort.
“Nothing,” I said. “You just have a crack up there. That’s all.”
“Oh,” Ryan said, glancing up at the ceiling with a frown. “Good to know.”
“Yup,” I said, jumping off the couch. “You ready to go?”
Ryan nodded and led the way outside. He locked the door behind us, and we set off toward the diner.
“It’s just across the street,” Ryan said. “Close enough to walk.”
I nodded. “Great.”
As we walked, Ryan kept up most of the conversation. Any awkward tension he felt upon my arrival was clearly gone. His easy demeanor was back, and he seemed more like the person I remembered. Still, I felt weird walking beside him. When we made it to the diner, we sat down in a corner booth and waited for a waitress to bring us menus. She took our drink orders before she walked away.
I skimmed the menu slowly, still not sure what to say. Being around Ryan felt nice, like old times, but it also felt strange. When we were younger, we never hung out alone. Bradley was always around, and even when Ryan lived with us, we didn’t spend much time together. I was young and so was he. We didn’t grow up together, not really, so our bond wasn’t very strong.
“So,” Ryan said. “You’re a veterinarian now?”
“I am,” I said proudly. “I just graduated and got this job at the clinic, but it’s been great so far”
“That’s not at all what I pictured you doing,” Ryan said with a cocky tone.
“Really?” I asked. “Why not?”
Ryan shrugged. “I don’t know. I just imagined you doing something bigger.”
“Bigger?” I repeated curiously.
“More important,” he clarified. “Like an environmental lawyer or a social worker or something.”
I frowned. Ryan’s words weren’t meant as an insult, but they felt like one. He didn’t know me as an adult, and he barely knew me as a child. I didn’t know what path he expected me to take, but I didn’t appreciate his snap judgement. He suddenly reminded me a lot of the kid I used to know.
Back then Ryan was always in trouble. His arrogance often drove him to do stupid things without fear of getting caught. He truly believed himself to be invincible. He wasn’t. He always got caught.
“I’ve always loved animals,” I reminded him, trying to keep the irritation out of my voice. “Don’t you remember me constantly begging Mom and Dad for a dog when we were younger?”
“I don’t remember much from that time,” Ryan said coldly.
“Why not?” I asked.
“I just didn’t feel like it was worth committing to memory,” he said.
His tone still held the same cocky coldness that made my blood boil. I kept myself calm, refusing to let my frustrations show. He was being rude, but he was still Ryan. I promised Bradley I would check in on him, so that’s what I was doing. If he wanted to be an arrogant dick, then fine.
“So,” I said after the waitress took our order. “What do you want to do with your life? I mean, now that you’re a civilian again.”
He shrugged. “I don’t know yet. I’m still adjusting to everything right now.”
“Sure,” I said. “That makes sense, but there must be something you want to do? Something that interests you.”
“I’ll figure it out,” he said with a wave of his hand. “Not worried about it yet.”
“Shouldn’t you be?” I asked. Like him, my words weren’t meant as an insult, but he seemed to take them as such. His eyes flashed as he leaned back in the booth.
“Well, not all of us can be vets, Jacqueline,” he said with a grimace.
“Did I say you should be?” I snapped. “I just asked a question.”
“And what prompted that question?” he demanded. “Your parents want to know what I’m doing now? Or did Bradley ask you to browbeat me into doing something productive?”
“Neither,” I said. “It’s a natural question to ask, Ryan. You just left the military. Anyone would wonder what your plans are.”
“Sure,” he scoffed. “Anyone.”
“Fine,” I said, sighing. “Let’s talk about something else.”
“Like what?” he asked as the waitress brought over our plates.
I smiled at her gratefully and popped a fry in my mouth.
“Well,” I said. “I just got this new patient on Friday. She’s a German shepherd, and she’s gorgeous. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more beautiful dog. But she has hip dysplasia so bad that she can barely walk sometimes. She’s only two, so it’s really weird.”
“Seriously?” Ryan asked, interrupting me.
“What? You wanted to talk about something else,” I said.
“And that’s what you chose?” he asked, laughing.
I narrowed my eyes angrily. After just a short time, I was already fed up with his attitude. He was cocky and rude, just like he’d been as a teenager. As time passed, I let myself believe he was a good person underneath everything. Even when he was at his worst, he was still nice to me. I guess that was because I was a kid, and now he didn’t care. There was no obligation to be polite or kind in my presence.
“This was a mistake,” I said softly. “Bradley wanted me to check in on you, but obviously that’s not what you want. I’m just going to go.”
“What?” Ryan asked, blinking with surprise. “Why?”
“Because you’re cocky, and you’re being an ass,” I said without hesitation. Being blunt was never my forte, but I couldn’t help it.
“I’m not,” he began, but I cut him off with a look.
“I’m not a kid anymore, Ryan,” I snapped. “I know we haven’t seen each other in years, but I really thought this would be nice. Catching up. Seeing you again. But it’s not.”
With that, I stood up and left the diner. Ryan called out my name, but I didn’t bother turning around. My hamburger sat untouched on the table; my appetite suddenly gone. I stormed across the street until I reached my car.
I glanced behind me to see if Ryan followed, but he was nowhere in sight. With a roll of my eyes, I unlocked my car and climbed behind the wheel. As I sat there, my anger slowly faded away and was replaced with a deep disappointment. My hopes for this afternoon had been high. I was nervous, but excited. I didn’t know what I expected from Ryan, but it wasn’t this.