Chapter Twenty-Five
We lay on the floor in front of the fireplace in our bedroom at the house in Utah. As soon as we arrived, Garrick had carried me across the threshold and brought me straight up here. For the next hour or two, he’d worshiped my body, making me feel like the most precious thing to him.
The heat of the fire kissed my back as I nestled against him. “This was a perfect way to spend Thanksgiving night. I missed this place.”
“Me, too. I missed this floor.” The floor in front of the fireplace was like a bed in the master suite. Best place to make love and sleep. We’d slept on the floor our first night here.
I giggled. “Can we sleep down here again tonight?”
“Absolutely.”
I ran my hands along his abs, feeling the muscles contract beneath my touch. I affected him. That was a heady feeling. Being with Garrick was a form of bliss I never knew existed.
“Are you happy, Knoah?” The deep concern in his voice jolted me from my thoughts.
I raised my head, confused by the question. Is he upset with our marriage? Was this too fast? Too intense? Hesitantly, I answered, “Yes. Are you?”
“Are you bored?”
He hadn’t answered the question, and I sat up, alarmed. “Are you saying that this was a mistake? That it was too fast.”
Confusion flashed across his face. Hurriedly, he sat up and brought me into his lap. His hands held my face. “Never, ever doubt my love for you. Our love will never be a mistake.”
I blinked a few times as I worked to slow my thoughts.
Garrick tipped his head to one side, watching me. “I will never stop loving you. And if you doubt my love, I’m not doing something right.”
“Garrick—”
“I mean it, Knoah. You are the love of my life. Without you, I would have nothing.”
I pressed my lips to his, relishing his love.
“Why did you think that?” he asked, still thoughtful.
“You’ve been off today. More distant. I just didn’t know why.”
Laying us back down, he pulled me onto his chest. “Humor me for a minute and answer the question. I promise I have a point. Are you bored?”
Looking down, I randomly traced a design on his chest. “I’m adjusting.”
“That’s not what I asked. Knoah, we have to communicate. It’s key to any relationship.”
He was right. Maybe this was why I had avoided talking about what we were facing. “Garrick, it’s not an easy situation. And I’m making the best of it. But, yes, at times I am a little bored.”
“What would you say to working with me?”
My head shot up and my eyes flew to his. Did I hear him correctly? “What?”
“You love public relations. Before, you were hesitant, and I understood why. But now we’re married. My companies are now our companies. If they thrive, it benefits us.”
Working again sounded amazing. More than amazing. Inside my head, I felt like I’d been wasting away. “Is this why you’ve been off today?”
“Yes. The Navarro situation has me perplexed. And working through the song issue with Legal hasn’t helped. But when Kurt brought up how much you’d been cooking, it disturbed me. I know you don’t love to cook, but it was all you were doing. All I cared about was that you were safe. But by ensuring your safety, I took away your purpose. I failed you as a husband.”
“You did not. Don’t say that, Garrick.”
“I did.”
It was my turn to grab his face. “You did not fail me. Every single intention you have is about me. If you love me, you can’t fail me.”
“I should be helping you thrive the way you help me. I should have thought of this earlier.” He flipped me over so he was on top, and his dick hardened against my thigh. I moved my hips to feel him against my clit. “You’ll be safe at Shaw International. What do you say?”
I pulled him to me. “Please,” I whined, needing him.
At my entrance, he barely pushed in. “What do you say?”
“I say yes. Please. I need you inside me.”
In an instant, I was rewarded with him pushing to the hilt. But then he paused.
No. No. No. I needed more.
I was about to protest when he ran his nose along mine. “This is the only place I ever want to be.”
~ ~ ~
Garrick kissed my neck as I dozed in and out of sleep. “Sweetheart?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you hungry?”
I snuggled closer, my back to his front. “No, I want to stay right here.”
“Sounds good to me.” His hands resumed their lazy trail over my torso. “Why didn’t you talk to me about it?”
Nearly asleep again, I missed what he was saying. “What?”
“Why didn’t you tell me how you were feeling?”
The concern in his voice woke me up. I watched the fire as I thought about his question. “I don’t know. I hadn’t realized it was happening, I guess. I was making due with our situation.”
His hands grazed down my stomach. “I understand. But we have to make sure we communicate. I won’t let you lose yourself in this life.”
“We’ve just had a lot coming at us lately, you know? Last time I threw a fit to get out of the tower, someone got killed. Then I went with Kurt…and we saw how that turned out today. Are you mad about that?” I let out a sigh after I asked, not realizing how worried I’d been about it.
He shifted slightly. “At you? No. I’m working through it with Kurt. We’re two different people. We handle things differently. Do I think he had any intention of this happening? No, I don’t.”
We lay a little longer as I thought about everything. “What’s going on with Navarro?”
“Not much. Carrie Duvall has not done anything outside of her routine. She stays at her apartment and goes to work at the strip club. That’s it.”
Mom and Dad’s child was still alive. I wondered what they would say when they found out. Hopefully Carrie was receptive to their love. If not, I feared what losing her a second time would mean for them at their age. The day at the bistro, she seemed interested in me. After all, she’d transformed my entire life.
So many pieces to the puzzle. “What about Vivian? Has she done anything since her meeting with Navarro?”
“The tail lost her once. We believe there was a potential meeting, but we haven’t found the place.” Dylan would have been devastated by his mother’s actions. “We’ll see what Hastings gets from Mickey. They’re going to dinner tonight.”
I blew out a breath. “What about Sawyer’s parents?”
“Christopher visited the compound again yesterday and was there for an hour. But other than that, nothing. Navarro has men watching the house nearly 24-7, so making any additional contact is out of the question.”
“Why?”
“If Navarro suspects anything, it could put them in harm’s way. Right now, they can’t get to you. And he can’t use Sawyer since all your interaction happens in Shaw Tower. We have Sawyer’s communications being monitored just to be sure.”
Basically, Sawyer was somewhat guilty by association in Garrick’s eyes. “I don’t think Sawyer is involved.”
“Neither do I, but that doesn’t mean her parents won’t use her as a pawn.”
My heart physically hurt at the thought of Tonya and Christopher entangled in such a web. “Do you think Navarro has something on them?”
“Most definitely. Or they aren’t aware of what’s going on.”
I thought back to the gala. “Have you tried to meet with Navarro to see what he wants?”
“Yes. The condition was to bring you along with only one security man. I wouldn’t agree, and Navarro knew this. Right now he’s playing us.”
During one of our discussions last week, Garrick had mentioned that Navarro played with his victims before killing them. Sometimes it took months before he grew bored of the game. That sick feeling took root in my stomach.
“Did you hear me, Knoah?”
“What?” I blinked a few time to clear my thoughts.
He pressed his lips to my neck. “I’m hiring someone to help me run things. Well, more like promoting from within.”
“What? Why?” This was unheard of; Garrick controlled every aspect of his company. “I don’t want you sacrificing for me.”
I tried to turn around, but he held me against him. “I’m preparing for the future.” His hand hovered over my stomach, and my heart plummeted a little. “We’ll be able to get away easier.”
Swallowing hard, I tried to keep my voice normal, but I was afraid of where this conversation was going. “Have these last few weeks been hard, workwise?”
“No. But when we come back from our getaways, I have to spend more time away from you than I want catching up. This week has been hell. There’re too many people depending on me to keep everything going so they can make their mortgage payments. I don’t want to be away from you like I’ve had to this week.”
From the tone of his voice, I knew there was more. I closed my eyes. “Is there another reason for this?” He remained silent, and I felt the first tear fall. “Garrick, it may never happen. It’s unlikely it will.”
“I know. But I won’t stop trying until I give you what you want.”
Another tear fell as my heart shattered. The one thing he wanted, and my body might not be able to do it. Yes, we could adopt, but I wanted to give him a child…carry our child…bring our child into the world. “You know it won’t be your fault if it doesn’t happen. It’s mine.”
Garrick rolled on top of me. His eyes were alarmed. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m so sorry.” A few more tears spilled. “If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. It won’t be either of our faults. Do you understand? There’s no blame.”
He waited for me to acknowledge it, so I nodded before he continued. “But if it does happen, I want to be prepared. Bringing someone up to speed to handle some of my workload will take months. I don’t want to miss a second of it.”
“Who are you thinking?” I moved on from talking about babies. Each of us knew the score.
“You remember Brenda from the event?”
I thought back to the first time I came to Shaw International when Brenda interviewed Mickey and me. “Yes. She seemed on top of her stuff.”
“She is. I made the offer this week and she accepted.” He ran his nose along mine. “So I’ll have more time to spend with you.”
I leaned into him. “I like the sound of that.”