There was a lot to clear up, talk to police about, and stories to get straight.

For obvious reasons, anyone that didn’t know the exact details never would.

When I’m free to leave everything and am finished talking to my coaches, my first thought is Kaija.

I have so many questions, but none of it matters until I see her, feel her.

I’d asked Hanson to go because I couldn’t, and he texts me where she is when I get to the hospital and I race there. The attendant nods at me, opening the door, and I steel my own emotions because it’s not about me right now.

Kaija’s standing next to the morgue table, silent.

“I didn’t imagine it would happen this way.” She doesn’t turn to me, just speaks aloud. “I never really imagined it at all, actually.” I stop next to her, keeping my hands to myself even though all I want to do is wrap them around her and never let her go.

I look down at the table and quickly look away.

Not my scene, but I suck it up.

“You probably have questions.”

“Yeah.” I answer. “You don’t have to worry about them right now.”

“No.” She turns to me, turning away from Wesley’s body. “I want to. I got you into all of this, you should at least know what brought it on, brought it here.”

“Can we uh…do it not ever a dead body?” I try to keep my gag back and a small smile lifts her lips, even though her eyes are red and swollen.

“Yeah.” Surprisingly, she grabs my hand and we leave the room, walking to the elevator and waiting for it to open.

I stand there and listen, not asking anything as she tells me everything that’s really happened over the past weeks. Why she was being secretive, her visit to Wesley to get answers, and why she pushed me away after. She tells me about Bahi not really quitting and someone named Richard Brooks, and how he wanted to get closer to people that knew her, so he began dating the woman who directs the center she and Jasmine volunteer at.

How they’d been keeping tabs on her, how Wesley escaped, and why she hadn’t shared it while it was happening.

She thought it was too much baggage.

My mind is blown. I can’t believe she dealt with all that, and I just thought it was about her not wanting to be with me.

Through telling all of it, she never lets go of my hand.

We end up in a side waiting room, me sitting beside her and her talking and talking and talking. It’s like everything she’s thought and felt, she finally feels like sharing and it’s all spilling out.

“I can’t believe Bahi just…sold you out.”

“They let me meet with her, and I was hoping there would be some reason. Like…they threatened her son, her family…something that would make it feel like our friendship didn’t just mean nothing to her.”

“And there wasn’t, at all?”

“Nope. She just wanted the money for information.” She pauses like she was going to say something else and looks at me, and I just stare at her.

“What?” She swallows hard.

“I don’t know whether to kiss you or walk away.” I confess, squeezing her hand. “I…fuck, that’s a lot. It’s a helluva lot and I don’t know if I’m even processing it all right now.”

“I don’t expect you to. I just…it was only fair that I tell you, because I was a huge jerk about it all.”

“I just wish you’d felt comfortable sharing it with me when it was happening. You didn’t have to handle it alone. That’s what I’m here for.”

“In case you didn’t notice, I don’t exactly let many people in easily. I keep a pretty tight circle, and I just…I didn’t feel like anyone should have to deal with my extra shit.”

“Why the change of heart now? Unless that sign and you holding my hand are you just you telling me you want to be friends.” I stroke the back of her hand with mine, looking down.

“No…I want to be all in. If you do, that is. No more throwing it in your face that it’s early, full transparency. And my sisters were very vocal about what they thought about what I was doing to you, and my mom agreed.”

“You told your mom about us?” I’m surprised. I didn’t know if they talked much.

“Keyra told her, and she threw her opinion into the ring earlier.”

“She’s here?”

“Yeah, she’s back stateside for a bit. I’ll introduce you.”

“I saw her picture that first night, and then Keyra told me about your relationship. I wasn’t sure if that was part of why you were pulling away, if you were scared I would eventually leave or something.” I admit.

“I was a little scared that I’d want to leave, honestly. I guess maybe you too…really, just scared of not being able to see the future. Which is kind of stupid because we have so much more time to get to know each other and there’s no guarantee this is even going to get as far as kids and marriage, but…I was just scared all around.”

“I don’t know, I think I’d marry you.” I don’t mean to say the words aloud, it was just kind of a thought thing, but now they’re out there.

“Shut up.” She says skeptically, face surprised. “You’re serious?”

I shrug, suddenly completely certain. Thinking back on the night, the time we’ve spent together, how I felt when I was with her…

“Yeah. You fit into my life in a way no woman ever has, intentionally or not. It might be crazy, but I don’t really see myself with anyone else now that I’m thinking about it.”

“Wow, no pressure.” She breathes, blinking.

“Don’t freak out on me, I’m just saying. We’ve got time. We’ll take it…medium speed.” I grin. “We didn’t really start slow.”

“We didn’t start slow at all.” She bites her lip. “So, we’re going for this thing?”

“We’re going for this thing.” I agree, making the decision right then and there. We can’t do anything about the past but put it behind us. I lean in to kiss her, but stop short. “Wait, did you watch the tape?”

She giggles, shaking her head. “Honestly, I just threw that out there because I knew you wouldn’t like it. I stared at that disc for awhile, but I didn’t feel any real want to see it.”

“You sure you wanna just dive in without seeing it? It was a little…hardcore.” I’m embarrassed and I can feel the flush on my face.

“We’ll break it into tiny pieces together later. But our pasts don’t define us and I’m done letting anything else that’s not happening right this very minute cloud my thoughts.”

“I think I could fall in love with you very easily, Miss Banks.” I whisper, meeting her lips with mine and I’m two seconds from pulling her into my lap when a throat clears behind us.

We peer to the side, and it’s Kaija’s father. “Your sister’s awake and asking for you.” He gives a grim smile. “Nice to see you again, Harlan. I’m glad to see you’ve worked things out.”

I stand, gripping Kaija’s hand again. “Me too, Sir. Me too.”