Chapter 13 – Jenny
This is bad, I think, sitting on the couch, my legs restlessly twitching. Not that Ty is staying here, but … that I want him to.
The mother side of me is furious and knows it’s a bad idea, but the woman side of me, and other parts of me, are aching for him. I let out a huge sigh of relief when he left the apartment, but I instantly felt a sense of loss. I hadn’t stopped thinking about him, and then there he was, showing up at my place only to leave again. But he’ll be back, and that’s the problem.
I have a very strict policy of seeing a guy for a long time before I bring him back to my house, and that’s already gone out the window. My daughter met him. Josh met him—and liked him! That I couldn’t believe. Josh isn’t the best around people he doesn’t know, and I’d panicked a little when I saw him standing over him. But Josh didn’t seem upset in the slightest. Neither did the dogs.
Maybe that’s a sign, I think.
Oh shut up, Jenny!
I rocket up off the couch and head to the sink and pour myself a glass of cold water. Is it hot in the apartment, or is it just me? Either way, I open a window and let the cool air rush in. I gulp down the whole glass in about two seconds and fill up another.
The image of Ty, shirtless, sitting up on my couch just will simply not leave my mind.
I could get used to that, I think.
Bzzzzt. Bzzzzt. My phone vibrates from the coffee table. I race over and snatch it up, eager to talk to anyone and get my mind off the man who is currently turning my life upside down. It’s Kristen.
“Hey, Kristen.”
“Hey, Jenny! Guess what!” She sounds pretty excited.
“What?”
“Guess who’s coming in tonight?”
“Ugh, just tell me, Kristen,” I groan, not in the mood to play twenty questions.
“Fat Guy and Momma’s Boy!”
We have nicknames for the regulars at the club, and some of them aren’t very nice. I know that she means Brian and Jeremy. Brian is … overweight, to put it nicely. And Jeremy is always talking to us about his mom. He’s fifty and they’re still very close. The best part about both of them, is they’re both loaded, and both love us.
“Oh, awesome,” I say, growing excited. “Did they say when?”
“Well, Anika spoke to them and he said probably about six and that he was ready to spend a lot of money. Can you get in?”
“Wow, let me see. I’ll call Alicia and call you back.”
“Okay!”
I hang up and instantly press Alicia’s contact. It rings a long time before she finally answers.
“Hello?” She sounds exhausted.
“Alicia,” I say. “Did I wake you?”
“No …” she mutters. “Well, yeah. But that’s okay. What’s up!?”
“Oh, God I’m so sorry. I was just calling to see if you could come sit for me tonight. A couple of big regulars are coming in.”
There’s a long pause and a voice that sounds male in the background. I hear her footsteps as she goes into another room.
“I’m sorry, Jenny. I can’t tonight. I’ve already got plans.”
My heart sinks.
“Really? You couldn’t make it for just a few hours?”
“I’m sorry, Jenny. I really wish I could, but I can’t.”
“Okay,” I reply. “I understand. Have a nice day!”
“You too,” she says.
I hang up and slump down on the couch. I’m not completely out of options, but I might as well be. I thumb my phone and scroll through my contacts until I find the name I always dread pressing: Colin, my ex-husband.
Mentally preparing myself for the worst, I press his name and raise the phone to my ear. It rings and rings.
“Come on, Colin,” I mutter under my breath. But the phone just keeps ringing. I hear a beep and his voicemail.
“Yo, you got Colin. You know what to do—”
I hang up. Just the sound of his voice on his recording drives me crazy. Talk about a deadbeat dad. We got together when I was a teenager. I wasn’t making the best decisions then. He was fifteen years older than me, but I didn’t care. He was hot and he had a car, and that’s all that mattered. Next thing I know I was pregnant and he was on his way out the door.
Fifteen years later and I haven’t received one single dime of child support. Every time I ask he makes up some excuse, and every time I try to go through the state I run into a brick wall. He lies about his income, stalls, goes out of town, and fights me every step of the way. And now, when I just need him to watch his kids for a few hours, he’s not answering my calls.
I grab my hair and tug hard. Just as I’m about to lose it, my phone vibrates in my hand. I check it: Colin.
“Oh, hi,” I say, a little too snippy as I answer the phone.
“Sup?” Is his only reply.
“Can you watch Ella and Josh tonight? I need to work.”
“No can do,” he says. What a surprise. My eyes roll so hard they almost fall out of my head.
“I really need to work tonight, Colin. I’m the one supporting our children.”
“Hey, I watch them when it’s my turn,” he says as though he’s doing me some sort of favor spending time with his kids.
“Yeah, when you don’t cancel or go on vacation or just want to hang out with your trashy girlfriend.”
“Is this gonna get nasty, Jenny?” he says in that condescending tone that makes me want to slap him.
“Nasty? Colin, I need to work. You don’t give me any child support, and I need you to watch the kids—your kids, and I’m the one being nasty?”
“Sorry, I’m not even in town tonight. I can ask Tony if he can take them.”
“Tony?” I say, almost laughing at the absurdity. “You think I’m going to let your scumbag friends look after my kids?”
“Our kids,” he corrects me. “What’s wrong with Tony?”
“Aside from his cocaine habit and the fact that he’s on parole? Nothing I guess.”
That shuts him up.
“You seriously are gonna do this?”
“Look, I’m not even in town,” he says, starting to sound annoyed. “I’ll toss you some money when I get back to make it up to you.”
Now he’s trying to pay me off. Unbelievable. What does it take to find a good man in this world?
“Fuck you, Colin,” I say and hang up.
I wind up to hurl my phone across the room, but I manage to stop myself. I can’t believe this. So typical. I don’t know why I’m surprised. If there was an award for being unreliable, Colin would be the clear winner year after year. My blood’s about to boil, and just when I’m about to erupt into a total adult temper tantrum, the door opens.
“Hey,” Ty says, strolling in like he owns the place.
“Hey!?” I say, ready to take my anger out on someone. “Hey? That’s all you have to say when you come into my place?”
Ty just looks at me for a minute, examining me like I’m some scientific specimen.
“What’s up your ass?” he says.
I scoff. “Excuse me?”
“You seem edgy,” he replies, moving past me towards the kitchen. As he passes, I can smell him again, and I feel my body responding.
Not now!
“Relax, would you,” he says, sounding irritated at me. “I’ve had a pretty fucked up day.”
Now he’s about to set me off. I’m two seconds away from snatching the glass of water out of his hand that he’s filling up at the sink, hurling it across the room and screaming for him to get out.
“You’ve had a fucked up day!?”
“That’s what I said,” he replies as he takes a swig of water.
How can any man piss me off and turn me on at the same exact time?
Look at his arms, I think. The same arms I’ve pictured around me, holding me by the waist as he has his way with me. I want to scream at him, but if he took me right now, I wouldn’t even try to stop him. I think part of me wants him to.
“Yeah? Well so have I. My sitter isn’t available, my ex-husband is being his typical douchebag self, and two of my regulars are coming in tonight and I won’t be able to go in. That means losing out on a lot of money and even longer without my car.”
“You need someone to watch the kids,” he says as a matter of fact.
“Yes,” I snap.
“I’ll watch them,” he says casually. I’m so shocked that I just stand there like a dummy for what feels like forever. Ty takes another sip from his glass and grins. “You all right?”
“Yes,” I say quickly. “Sorry. You’ll watch them?”
“Yeah, sure. How hard could it be? They get rowdy I’ll just put them outside,” he says. My jaw drops. “The dogs, not the kids.”
I’m weighing the pros and cons in my head, and I can’t believe it. Ty shouldn’t even be in my house let alone watching my kids, but I’m considering it. And it’s not just because there’s a lot of money to be made tonight. Something about Ty … I just trust him.
“You’d do that?” I ask.
“You’d let me?” he says, almost daring me to tell him no. He takes a few steps towards me. I can smell him again. I can see the vein running down his strong bicep and the tense muscles of his shoulders. He’s looking down at me with those eyes, and I feel myself shudder.
“I don’t know why, but yes.”
“Okay,” he says. He keeps looking at me, like he’s waiting for me to do something. But I don’t know what to do. I want something to happen. Anything. We’re home alone. I’m home alone with a man. It’s like I’m a teenager again, happy that my parents are gone and my boyfriend is over. Only I’m the mom and Ty is not my boyfriend.
“I should … get ready,” I say softly. I turn away and walk quickly to my room and close the door behind me. My heart is pounding, and as I sit down on my bed, I realize I’m wet between my thighs. This is unbelievable. I’m a stripper for God’s sake! I get hit on by men every time I work, and I’m wearing next to nothing. But that’s just a job, and those guys are mostly dicks. I thought Ty was the same when I met him, but I guess life can throw a curve ball at you when you least expect it.
At the club, all I can think about is Ty. I’m sitting with Fat Guy, aka. Brian, and Kristen is dancing for Momma’s Boy, aka. Jeremy. I’m glad I got Brian, he doesn’t want any dancing or topless nonsense. He just wants someone to talk to. His wife left him five years ago and took him for half of what he had. After all that, he still loves her. Part of me finds it pathetic, but the other part of me finds it sad.
All he really wants is someone to talk to—companionship. That’s why I don’t like working the main room and the stages. Those guys just want some ass and titties in their face and want to feel like ballers when they shower us with one dollar bills. One dollar bills. Do you know how many one dollar bills they would have to throw at me for me to make any money? I can make what most girls make in a night from an hour here in the champagne room.
So far I’m up eight hundred.
“So here they are, these people, telling me to stay away from the woman I’ve loved for nine years,” Brian is saying. “And it’s killing me. Because I love her, ya know?”
“Wow, that is pretty crazy,” I say. I’ve heard this before, but it’s still heart wrenching. I’m doing my best to be commiserative, but Ty keeps invading my thoughts. The weirdest part of it all, is that I’m not worried about my children. Even with Alicia I worry. I trust her, and I’ve used her before in the past, but she’s young and she’s not perfect. I know she can’t handle my neighbors, and she’s not a big girl, so if something were to happen …
But with Ty there, I feel like the Nazis could try to invade my apartment and Ty wouldn’t let them through the front door.
“What do you say we do another bottle?” he says. That’s good news for me. Another bottle means another two hundred bucks. Not for the alcohol itself, but for my service. We work off tips, and Brian’s a heavy tipper. He doesn’t act like he’s a big shot either, he just likes to. He’s a generous guy and likes to help out.
“That sounds good to me,” I say, getting up and heading downstairs. As I pass the bar, I remember the first time I bumped into Ty and thought he was a rude, cocky asshole. Now he’s back at my apartment watching my kids. I thought I’d gotten good at reading people after all these years. I never expected to run into someone like him.