I’M GOING TO die. Of blue balls disease. Maiya is going to fucking kill me dead. I’m bent at the waist trying like fuck to keep my raging hard on from touching her. It’s practically strangling itself in the elastic of my boxers, and she slips her tongue in my mouth. My cock is practically screaming for me to man up and stick him in that sweet smelling pussy that wants him so bad. Any other woman would have been fucked fifty ways till Sunday. But I just can’t do it. Fuck me and my moral compass. Fuck. I pull away and hold her face between my shaking hands. I’m not nervous. Fuck no, it’s the strain of holding back making my hands shake like a drunk on a day dry. It’s killing me. Her face is so innocent and trusting that I almost cave, throw her on the bed and push inside until I’m home. I clench my fists at my sides and close my eyes tight. I pull back a little, and I hear her sigh. Another step back, and I open them. She looks hurt. Dickhead.
‘I’m…err… just gonna jump in the shower real quick, okay?’ I tell her, as I turn and powerwalk the few motherfucking steps to the bathroom. I turn the shower on and before I’ve even got my boxers off I’m fisting my cock and stroking him up and down, violently. I stand under the hot water and stroke after stroke I visualise her kneeling before me, that gorgeous look on her face. And I come all over the shower wall groaning her name, and it’s that intense I don’t hear the door open. I turn to find her in the doorway, watching me, with a weird look on her face. Fuck me. I watch her as she backs up out of the room and closes the door. I rest my head against the cool tiles and catch my breath. I find Maiya ready and waiting to leave the bedroom when I eventually walk back in.
So we’re pretending like she didn’t just walk in on me spanking the monkey.
When we get to the kitchen, although we haven’t spoken one word to each other, she moves as close to my side as possible. If she got any closer, I’d be wearing her. I feel her stiffen as Jared and Devon walk in through the back door and head over to the table. I see Jared’s jaw clench slightly as Devon tenses at his side. Every time these two get close, she tries to talk to Maiya, and I see the hope in her eyes every fucking time. It’s tearing her up inside. It’s horrible for me to watch, so I understand the anger Jared feels towards Maiya because she’s the one that’s making his female hurt.
‘Take a seat, I’ll grab the pancakes,’ I tell Maiya, pointing out the opposite end of the bench to Jared and Devon. Everyone at the table stopped their talking when we walked in, so the tension in this room is just levelling up. And it’s not a good feeling.
‘Forget it. I’ve suddenly lost my appetite.’
My eyes go straight to Devon, and I see the hurt on her face. I cringe as the words leave Maiya’s mouth, and I want to pull her away and tell her to be quiet, but it’s too fucking late. Devon walks away, and I see the anger bubbling to the surface as Jared steps forward. He’s been lenient so far with her, and he’s had enough.
‘Who the fuck do you think you are?’ he shouts at her and then looks at me as I step between them. He frowns but then he looks right past me as if I’m not there. Fuck. ‘You’ve been through some shit, so you think you have the right to lay the blame at her door?’ Maiya begins to speak, but the look I give her stops her dead. I agree with Jared here, but that doesn’t mean I want her hurting. ‘You ever stop to think about the shit she went through? About the shit they did to her? She lost her fucking father to them, and all you do is throw a fucking pity party for yourself every chance you get. I’m fucking sick of it. You change your fucking attitude, or you’re on your fucking own. She won’t throw your arse out, but I will.’ He turns to me then, ‘And if you don’t fucking like it, tough shit’ he says, storming off after Devon. I glare at Maiya before I take a calming breath with my eyes closed. This has to fucking stop.
‘Bedroom. Now.’ I tell her. I know how that sounds and they can all think what they fucking like. Right now. I’m pissed off. She turns and walks up the stairs, all sassy and shit. And fuck me if it doesn’t make my dick twitch. When I close the door behind me, she’s pacing up and down.
‘Maiya…’ I start but she stops in front of me, and the look on her face tells me she doesn’t need to be shouted at right now.
‘I didn’t know. You never told me. Why didn’t you tell me they killed her dad?’
I roll my eyes and search the ceiling for a better answer than the one on the end of my tongue. I don’t find one.
‘Because the mere mention of her name and you flip your shit—it was pointless. I tried to tell you.’
She swallows hard and looks at her feet. ‘What else happened?’
‘I’m not a hundred percent on the details, but she was in pretty bad shape too when Jared found her.’
Her eyes close like she’s ashamed. I feel sorry for her. I can’t help it. But at the same time, I’m still mad. This is my pack, my family, and Devon is my alpha’s female. If Maiya has any sort of chance at staying, this needed to end. I’m lost in my own thoughts when I feel her tug at my hand. I look at her and see tears swimming around those big blues. Something inside me tugs and my heart aches. I hate this.
‘I guess I should speak to her?’ she questions.
‘Yeah, you should… should apologise too for all the shit you’ve said to her. Do you even realise what a wreck she was the whole time you were missing? Every day she fell to pieces and Jared had to pick her back up, and then we found you, and you treated her like shit. It’s not bad enough that she knows they took you to get at her. No, you have to rub it in her face every time you see her. Maiya, she didn’t do this to you—we didn’t do this to you. They did. And I fucking promise you with everything I have, that I will make every last one of them pay for what they did. But you need to stop this shit with Devon. It wasn’t her fault.’
‘You don’t understand—’
‘I may never fully. But you need to understand that no one feels worse than her about it, and no one BUT Devon understands what you went through.’
Her chin quivers and her lip trembles as her eyes spill over with tears. I pull her into my chest and kiss the top of her head. Maybe I was a bastard, but it had to be said. If it was the other way around, and I was in Jared’s shoes, I think I would have snapped way before now. I hold her close while she cries it all out. When she finally takes a long inhale, and steps back, I see determination on her face.
‘Thank you’ she tells me.
I frown. Because I don’t have a clue what I’ve done? ‘For?’ I ask, wary of her answer. Is it a trick? Does it have a double meaning? Who the fuck knows.
‘For making me listen,’ she tells me.
I sigh, relieved. Finally, I’ve got through. I take a step towards the bed, but she moves into my body again, hugging me this time, making it so I’m not able to hide the massive hard on I get when her lips seek out mine. I groan into her mouth as her hands move along my back and slide along the top of my ass. I’ve been thinking about this all fucking night, and I think I know what I’ve got to do, but I didn’t bank on how hard it would be for me. As her tits push up against my chest and her hands squeeze my ass, I just want to pick her up and fuck her against the wall. Take her in every way and claim her as mine. But I can’t, I have to do this her way, at her pace, and on her terms. Fuck me. It’s going to kill me.
I slide my arms around her as the kiss becomes more… just… I can’t concentrate, and I know she can feel my cock against her stomach. Will she stop? Freak out? Will I have to leave again? Fucked if I know, but I’m done being a gentleman. This is going to happen, even if it kills me in the process. I walk her slowly backwards towards the bed. I feel her tense a little when her legs hit the bed. I pull back, looking into her big blues. I kiss at her lips again, a chaste kiss, giving her time. There’s no hesitation on her part.
Everything since her surgery has healed, so we have a green light. Getting to here has been all I’ve thought about. And now I am, I’m like a horny teenager who can’t wait to get his dick wet. I’ve never gone this long without sex. Ever. So this is going to be over quick if I don’t take back at least some control. I lift her onto the bed and follow so our lips stay locked. I hold my weight off her with one elbow while I splay my fingers across her arse cheek and squeeze. Fuuuuck. I’m gonna come in my pants. I let go and pull back. Maiya’s eyes widen a touch, and I think she thinks I’m going to stop. I kiss her lips once more so she knows that isn’t the case. I know she’s scared, I smell her fear, but she’s working through it. I pull her up to sitting and take the hem of her top in my hands. I bunch it in my fingers while waiting for her to object. I start to pull it up, and she lifts her arms so it comes off in one swift move. Leaving her in just a black bra. I close my eyes against the desperate need I feel to cup her tits and suck on the nipple teasing me through the black lace. She’s beautiful, and the need to claim her is even stronger now.
I lie her back on the bed and whisper into her ear. ‘If you want me to stop, you need to tell me right now.’
‘Don’t stop, Brad,’ she whispers back, and there is something about the way she says my name like I’m the best thing she’s ever seen. It makes my dick jerk. Jesus. I need to make this all about her. I need to make her forget the rest and make sure she never wants another man after me. I slowly lick around her nipple through the lace, and I feel her shudder. I move across, showing the other nipple the same attention. I pinch it between my teeth and lap at it, making her gasp. The sound is beautiful, and I want more. I gently move my hand around her back and unclip her bra. The straps come away from her shoulders and almost like it’s instinctual, her hands come up to cover herself.
‘Let me see you,’ I tell her. Her tongue peeks out and swipes her bottom lip. It takes everything in me not latch onto it and kiss her till she can’t breathe. But I mentally talk myself down. It’s like the worst form of torture. I’ve been desperate for this for that long, and now it’s within my grasp, I want to go at it hard and fast. But I can’t. I’m screaming inside and all the while she’s trembling under me. She’s scared shitless, but I know that if we get passed this point, and I can make her feel good, we’ll be on the right track. She’s being so strong and brave that my internal battle must be nothing in comparison to what she’s going through. Her hands slowly move away from her breasts, and I finally get to see the perfect mounds and her pink nipples that call out for attention.
I know she’s self-conscious about her marred skin, but I don’t see it. It has no bearing on her beauty. I slowly glide my fingers softly up and down her sides, collar bone, and across both breasts. The small little gasps leaving her mouth are like my own personal cheering squad, spurring me to go on, despite the fear she is experiencing. Maiya wants this just as much as I do, but her fear has been the driving force for her. Now she’s ready to claim her body back. To enjoy her body and all the things it can experience. All the things I can make her feel. And she’s going to find out just how far I can take her pleasure. We just need to break through this barrier, together.
I slowly kiss across her stomach and dip my tongue into her navel. She sucks her stomach in and giggles nervously. I smile up at her as my fingers grasp the waistband of her jeans, and slowly I start to pull them down with my eyes on hers. Her fear is through the roof, but I also smell her arousal. I tug them over her ankles and take in the view. Her arms go to cover herself again, and I almost growl in frustration, as my eyes take in every inch every curve of her perfect body. I take her hands in mine and pull her up sitting once again. I stand before her, fully clothed, and I am about to kneel and worship that pretty little hot spot between her legs, but she surprises the fuck out of me when she grabs the hem of my t-shirt and stands, taking it up and over my head. I bring my hands down and clutch her face in my palms and bring my lips to hers. The kiss is slow burning but increases rapidly to one filled with desperation and need. Her fingers find the button on my jeans, and before I realise it, I’m having to step out of them, pooled at my feet. My boxers are tented with my cock at attention. Seeking out what I’ve denied him all these weeks. I kneel before her, and she looks confused. I press my mouth to her pubic bone and kiss her there slowly. I sit her down on the edge of the bed and spread her legs wide. Her legs are trembling, and I feel like a bastard because I can’t stop now. Nothing is going to keep me from tasting that sweet fucking pussy.
‘Sweetheart, lie back on the bed for me, don’t be shy, just relax and let me take care of you.’ Her pink lips purse together as she nods and lies back on the bed. I lift her legs over my shoulders. I want to eat this pussy like a starved man, but I take it slowly. If my dick were able, it would be kicking my arse right now and telling me to get the fuck inside her. I flick my tongue, lapping her glistening slit and I moan. I push back her legs, opening her further to me, and then I lose all control. I have her clit between my teeth and a finger inside her on the next stroke of my tongue. I’m done for. This is the best fucking flavour in the world. I hear her groan as I curl my finger inside. Inserting another finger, I go deeper and curl them as I suck on her clit. Her body starts to jerk and tremble as the first signs of her orgasm hits. Then her pussy clamps around my fingers making me pump them faster and faster, bringing her to climax. Her thighs grip either side of my head, and I have to fight against the hold she has on me so I can bring her through it. The scream and the sound of my name leaving her lips are fucking amazing and makes me feel like the luckiest man on the planet. A couple more flicks of my tongue and jerks of her legs and I pull my fingers out, sucking her flavour into my mouth on a moan. Her chest is heaving, and she’s looking away in embarrassment.
‘Sweetheart, you okay?’ I lie beside her and pull her chin towards me. Her eyes are full of unshed tears.
‘Maiya, did I hurt you?’ She shakes her head. The look on her face will torture me forever, but not as much as the next words that leave her mouth.
‘I never knew it could feel like that,’ she says. I frown, shocked.
‘Like what?’ I ask like a douche.
‘Good, nice, it was…’
Oh, thank fuck for that. I sigh, relieved. ‘You’ve never had an orgasm before?’
Her head shakes in answer. I can’t help but grin.
‘So, that was your first?’ For some reason this makes me feel like a fucking king. I knew she wasn’t a virgin, obviously, but it makes me swell with fucking pride that I claimed her first orgasm.
‘Well shit, sweetheart. I can’t help but be glad I’m your first. How are you feeling? About this?’ I gesture between our bodies, kicking myself for bringing attention to the tepee in my boxers. Normally, I wouldn’t stop to have a conversation. I would eat pussy usually while getting sucked off and then I’d fuck them till I came and be on my way. Maiya was a whole different ball game. And as much as my dick was punishing me for not cuddling up with her pussy, I was willing to take as long as she needed me to. Instead of an answer she licks at my lips and tastes herself there.
‘You like the taste of you on my lips?’
She nods and moves in some more. Again, a slow burning kiss turns fervent and desperate, but I stay still and let Maiya take the lead. Her hands squeeze my biceps, and she moves them up and across my chest like she’s memorising all the dips and curves of each muscle. Then her fingers grasp the elastic on my boxers and brush along the head of my cock, and he jerks thinking this is it. If I could get any harder, I would explode. Her fingers trace around the head and down the shaft, and I moan at the slightest of touches. Fuck me. I want to flip her on her stomach and fuck her till she screams out my name. My hands are shaking from the sheer force of my will. Battling against my body to take over.
I never gave up control in the bedroom, but this is Maiya, and this is what she needs, so if I don’t get my dick in there today, so be it. This will do until she’s ready. Her hand squeezes my dick as she moves up and down my shaft. She’s unsure and slow, but it feels damn good anyway. Was it the best I’d had? No, but we would work on that.
‘I want to, Brad,’ she whispers. My eyes spring open. I have to know specifically what she wants to do? There is no room for assumptions here.
‘What, sweetheart?’
Her eyes look anywhere but at me, and the blush on her face creeps all the way in until her cheeks are bright pink. I smile because she’s so damn cute. But I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable.
‘Close your eyes and tell me what you want me to do?’
She closes her eyes like I’ve asked, and I take in the pink blush of her cheeks, the darker pink of her lips, and the dark contrast her lashes make against her skin. Her breaths are still a little ragged from her orgasm, and she is trying hard to speak out and tell me what it is she wants. But something is holding her back.
‘How about I close my eyes too?’
Her eyes open and she smiles, nodding. I do, and I keep to my word and keep them closed. ‘Now I need you to tell me exactly what you want, beautiful. You’re the boss, okay? I will do exactly what you say.’
‘Okay,’ she says, all breathy and sexy as fuck. Jesus, if there is a more painful method of torture I’m not aware of it. If my balls get any tighter or my dick any harder, I swear I’ll die. I have to stop myself from pistoning my hips against her leg and dry humping her like a dog.
‘I want everything,’ she whispers, and I sigh. My dick is weeping in relief, and my ball sack is singing ‘god save my ejaculation.’ I have to swallow before I can answer because I swear my voice will be an octave higher from the torture of holding back.
‘Tell me what you want me to do.’ I manage without squeaking thank fuck.
‘Please, will you…will you make love to me?’
HELL YES!! I’ve never made love. EVER. I’ve fucked, sure. But that’s not what this was going to be, by a long shot. No, I am going to make sweet fucking love to my girl. And she IS going to be my girl—she just doesn’t know it for sure yet. But she will.
‘Are you sure?’ I ask, praying to all the sex gods in the sky that she doesn’t change her mind.
‘I’m sure,’ she whispers. I look at her now, and her big blues are wide, and she’s smiling, holding my face in her hands. I smile back as her hands reach my boxers and she pushes the elastic down and over my ass. I kiss her, and I shudder as the scent of her arousal overpowers the fear. I don’t want her scared again, so I lie on my back and pull her up so she’s straddling me. It surprises her, and I have to wonder what her sexual experiences were before… I close my eyes against that thought, and I reach up to stroke her face.
‘This is about you taking control, okay?’
She nods, looking worried.
‘When you’re ready, just lower yourself onto me.’ I can already feel that she’s more than ready as my dick is pushed lengthways against her pussy.
She fumbles around a little bit and then looks embarrassed as she says, ‘Brad, I don’t know what to do. I’ve never done this. I’m sorry.’ She goes pink again and tries to move off me. But I don’t let her.
‘Hold your weight on your knees.’ I hold my dick at her opening. ‘Now, when you’re ready, just move down as far as you’re comfortable, okay?’
She smiles shyly, but she doesn’t waste time and before I know it I’m seated inside her hot-as-hell pussy, and the soldiers are screaming to be released. Like the fuckers are ready to go to war. Maiya stays still like she’s adjusting to having me inside. And I’m fucking glad because if she moves, I’m going to blow. I take in a deep breath and recite all the older females names from the pack back home, in my head, as I exhale.
‘Is it hurting?’ she asks again, trying to get off, but I hold her hips in place.
‘No, it feels fucking amazing.’
Then her pussy clenches around my dick and OH… my fuck… Betty… Amelia…Rose… Theresa… Oh… she moves her hips a little more… Paula… Margaret… Jesus fuck… I hold her hips in place, stilling her. I sit up, so we’re face to face, and I kiss her for all I’m worth. This is a first for me. I’ve never given sexual control to anyone before, but giving this to Maiya made it all the more special for me. I pull away, sucking her bottom lip into my mouth.
‘Are you ready?’ I ask. And giggling she nods. ‘Hold on to me,’ I tell her, and her arms come up around my neck. I hold her by the hips, and I thrust up. We get into a rhythm together until we are both panting. Her breathy moans stir something inside me, and I go faster, grinding our lower bodies together. The walls of her pussy start to pulsate and clamp around me, and I’m all but screaming her name. ‘Feels so fucking good,’ I grunt out while she moans louder and louder with each thrust. I know when the moment hits because she bites into my shoulder and her body stills. I go over with her, and I kick out my orgasm inside her. Fuck me. So intense—as though my body has stored that shit up and is angry at me—it’s kicking out with such force. I moan as light flashes behind my eyelids, and I grip her hips like I might fall off the edge of the bed if I don’t. Fucking amazing. I want to stay where I am and just bask in the amazing fucking feeling, but I need to make sure she’s okay. I crack my lids and see a look of pure ecstasy shining right back at me. Her beautiful blues are wide, and her mouth is open with her bottom lip pulled between her teeth as she looks deep into me. I think I could fucking fly right now.
‘Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you?’ I ask suddenly wondering if I went to hard for our first time. She shakes her head though.
‘It was perfect.’
Well, shit if my ego doesn’t inflate. I kiss her lips and wrap my arms around her. There are jokes pinging off in my mind about being perfect, but I keep my mouth shut, so I don’t ruin the moment. I’m elated because she’s smiling and we got her past the first hurdle.
‘You were perfect,’ I tell her, making her smile.
‘Do you want me to move so you can—’
‘I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay right here until you’re ready,’ I tell her
‘I’m kinda tired.’
So I start to lift her up, but she clamps her legs around me. ‘I don’t want you to move. Is it okay if we lie like this?’
Is it okay? Is it fucking okay? Damn straight it is. ‘Whatever you want, beautiful.’
Still straddling me, she lays her head on my chest. And then it’s just us, breathing together in sync. I’m still hard as steel inside her—how after that orgasm I have no clue. But the boy is still up. It’s not long before Maiya’s breathing changes, and I know she’s asleep. I should move her and get showered, but I just want to lie here.