‘WHAT THE FUCK, doc. What did you do?’
‘I have a feeling this pregnancy could be an ectopic. If it’s ruptured, she could be bleeding internally. She needs a hospital now.’
‘Jesus fucking Christ. Do you even have one we can use here?’
‘She’s human. She can go to any.’
‘The fucking baby isn’t.’
‘Oh. You’re the father.’
I don’t correct her because what’s the point?
‘She also has my blood in her system—we need a hospital we can use.’
‘Let me make a call, and then I want to know why she has your blood in her system.’ She gets her phone out from the fucking Stone Age and takes her time finding whoever it is she needs to call. I’m pulling my fucking hair out when she finally rings through. ‘I need an intake—possible ectopic pregnancy. Immediate transport needed. Yes, the compound.’ She hangs up as the guy on the phone agrees.
‘I need some answers from you.’
‘Fire away, doc. But tell me she’s gonna be okay, yeah?’
‘She will be okay, providing we’ve caught it early enough. Now explain why she has your blood in her system and how?’
‘I don’t see why that’s relevant at this point,’ Jared speaks from the door. They all come in, and Devon moves around me and to Maiya’s side.
‘I didn’t know,’ I hear Devon whisper. Jared is standing by my side, and we look like a mirror image of the other in our stance. Arms folded, legs wide—looking down at the doc who doesn’t really seem to give a flying fuck.
‘Why does she have your blood in her system?’
‘We like kinky sex—blood is exchanged from time to time, satisfied?’ Being faced down by two big ass males didn’t faze her but talk of kinky sex and she’s all of a fluster. Score to Brad.
The ambulance arrives, and we head out to their hospital. Maiya is given meds to help her sleep while they discover what’s going on. They want her undressed and fitted into a gown. I kick everyone out of the room, and I do the job myself. I know she isn’t mine, but I don’t want anyone else near her, not even the nurse. I’m as gentle as possible. Then the nurse comes back with a machine to scan Maiya’s stomach. I don’t know what I’m looking at when the blue and black screen comes up and a whooshing noise fills the room. She makes lots of clicks and takes measurements and then turns on her swivel stool to look at me.
‘Would you like to wait until she is awake?’ I should really, but fuck if I can wait. I need to know what the hell is wrong with her now.
‘Just spit it out?’
‘I will just go and get a doctor so that they can explain.’
I start to pace up and down, and the wait for them to come back is like infinity stretched. When the guy comes in, he goes to the screen and starts playing with shit, and I’m almost at breaking point when he finally speaks.
‘I’m afraid that this was never a viable pregnancy. It is what we call an ectopic pregnancy. There is nothing we can do to save a pregnancy that grows in the fallopian tube, often they come away by themselves, and you are never aware you had it. But, unfortunately, in this case, it has attached and grown until it has ruptured. We are going to have to operate to remove the tube and the remainder of the pregnancy. I’m very sorry.’
I nod, unable to form words right now. ‘I will leave you a moment, and we will be back to prepare for surgery.’ Again, I nod, swallowing any response at the thought of surgery. Shit.
Devon and Jared come in, and her face crumples when I tell her the news.
‘As if she hasn’t been through enough already. Did she want the baby? I mean, under the circumstances no one would have blamed her—’
‘She hadn’t decided, but I really think she was coming around to the idea. We didn’t really speak of termination.’ Devon squeezes my arm, and Jared claps me on the shoulder.
‘I’m sorry, man.’ He seems genuinely sorry too. I still can’t digest this shit. As I sit on the stool and take Maiya’s hand in mine, the doc comes back in. He’s ready for surgery, and two nurses follow him. They start prepping the bed to wheel it out of the room.
‘Where are you taking her?’ I demand with panic clear in my voice. ‘I want to go with her.’
‘I’m sorry, son, but it’s not possible for you to be in the theatre when we’re conducting surgery. What you can do is wait in the relatives room—down the hall and to the right—and someone will be along when she’s in recovery.’
‘Wait? How long will it take?’ I demand because I can’t sit there without some sort of time limit so I know if things are wrong.
‘We can’t say for sure—just depends on what we find when we open her up.’
‘Fucking humour me, doc!’
He takes a deep breath and sighs. ‘Fine, shouldn’t be any more than a few hours.’ So three. Three fucking hours.
I wear a path in the carpet, Devon keeps standing and patting my arm. Jared keeps coming in and out, and my nerves are fucking shot. I need someone to come and fucking tell me what the hell is going on. It’s been almost four hours, and I can’t take anymore. I storm through the doors, hearing Devon and Jared shout after me, but I’m done waiting, they need to tell me what the fuck is wrong, and I need to see she’s okay before I kill someone. I find the nearest nurse and demand to know where Maiya is. When she shrugs her shoulders and tells me she isn’t her patient. I take her by the elbow and march her down the long corridor with me. She’s practically running to keep up.
‘You don’t know, then you can find someone who does. I want to know now.’ Her face pales, but I’m passed caring. I want to know if Maiya is okay, and I want to know now. Just as I’m about to burst through a set of doors marked ‘theatre’, the doc appears from a room next door. He’s in a white coat and no longer wearing surgical clobber. I stop and release the nurse’s arm. He comes towards me with a stony expression on his face. ‘Where the fuck is she?’ I demand.
‘She is in recovery and not yet ready for visitors.’
‘She say that?’
‘No. I say that.’
‘Fuck you, doc. I’m seeing her right now,’ I tell him, pushing past him, knocking into his shoulder. Fucker has balls because he comes after me and tugs on my arm. I stop and glare at the place his hand is touching. Then I look in his eyes and growl. He lets go. But still runs his mouth.
‘Unless you have an explanation as to what has happened to this woman then you are going nowhere near her. I will call security.’ The fuck?
‘What?’
‘I said—’
‘Heard what you said, doc—now explain it.’ He’s flustered and didn’t expect that from me. He obviously thinks I’ve done something to her. Well, fuck if I know what he’s talking about, but I will find out. I keep walking until I find her. I look through the small pane of glass, and I almost fall to my fucking knees. She’s a mess. Pale, her burns look fresh, and she looks like death is approaching her fast.
‘Get me a needle,’ I demand from the doc.
‘I’m sorry, but you will have to leave the premises. We cannot allow you to have illegal substances. I don’t care who you are.’
‘For fuck’s sake! GET.ME.A.FUCKING.NEEDLE.NOW!’ I roar out, and I watch his demeanour change, and he backs up out of the room, but Jared blocks the doorway.
‘Unless you want her death on your hands, doc, I’d get him the fucking needle,’ Jared tells him calmly. The doctor goes to a locked cupboard in the room, and takes out a handful of equipment and gives it to me.
‘How much blood has she lost?’ I ask. He thinks on it and stumbling on his answer he says, ‘Maybe a few pints.’
‘She needs more than I can give her like this—she needs a transfusion, and it needs to be my blood. Get whatever you need to do it now. Fast.’ He doesn’t question me and rifles through the cupboard again. Bringing out all sorts of fancy shit. Zoe never used anything like this. In no time at all, I’m hooked up and bleeding into a bag. Then another as the first is hooked up to Maiya. My heart is beating overdrive as I watch the first bag slowly drain dry. After the third, I’m feeling a bit fucking dizzy, so I stay in my seat and get a cotton blob stuck on my arm where the needle went. I lie there with my eyes closed, and I must bob off because the next thing I hear is Maiya’s voice.
‘Brad?’ I sit straight up before my eyes have even opened. And I blink like fuck to clear the blurry vision.
‘Brad, why am I in the hospital? What’s happened? How did I get here?’ And my heart sinks. How the fuck do I tell her?
‘You’re okay, sweetheart. Stop trying to get up,’ I tell her as she fights with the tubes attached to her arm and nose. ‘Maiya, stop.’ I say in a tone I haven’t used with her before, but it makes her stop what she’s doing and listen to me.
‘Sweetheart, I’m so sorry, but you’ve lost the baby.’
There is no emotion on her face other than shock. Not even shock really, more of a disbelieving confusion. Then her head shakes back and forth. ‘No… how? I didn’t decide that… I was going to… I was okay… I was… I wanted to…’ she mumbles over and over that she wanted to keep the baby, and my heart breaks all over again. What will it take for this woman to catch a fucking break? Why her?
I pull her head to my chest. ‘I’m so fucking sorry, sweetheart.’
Her sobs shake through her body and mine, and it’s all I can do to keep my own at bay. Instead, I cry silent tears for her and a baby that was never meant to be. A baby conceived in hate and lost in love. It’s cruel really.