Chapter 13
June
I was in the middle of cutting fabric when my phone beeped. I’d been tracing the pattern for the reversible style of bandanas I was working on for the last hour, and wanted to start on the other fabric I was planning on using for the other side. I never got used to how excited the little things in life made me, but knowing I’d see a finish product soon… it made me smile, even if it was dog bandanas I was making, because they were my dog bandanas. Not anyone else’s.
I didn’t even bother rushing to look at my cell phone screen. Anyone texting me knew that after six o’clock, I was usually in work mode. If it was something important, they could call. It wasn’t for another half hour, until I was done cutting out giant triangle-like shapes on the second fabric I was using, that I dragged my cell over the worktable toward me.
And then I saw it.
AHALL80 SENT YOU A MESSAGE
My heart leapt.
And as quickly as it leapt, it seemed to seize up in a way it hadn’t in years.
It had been two weeks since the Skype app had been opened on my phone, much less on my computer. Two weeks in which I’d tried to stop thinking about this man I’d been forced into a friendship with through a foundation. Fourteen nights where every time I lay in bed—and every time I had a spare moment to think—I thought about those damn Xs and Os. Mostly though, I thought about the man I’d gotten to know, and I wondered if he had gotten home okay and tried not to miss his messages and e-mails.
I’d put my foot in my mouth plenty of times in my life, but what I’d done in our last conversation was at the top. So far at the top, I didn’t know how something else would ever beat it.
Knowing my luck, I’d jinxed myself by just thinking about it, but I shoved that possibility to the back of my mind for later.
I had more important things to think about. Like Aaron messaging me after weeks. Like he’d said he would. After I pretty much told him I was sending him hugs and kisses like a stalker.
Since talking to my sisters about it, I’d wondered if I was overthinking it. Maybe he hadn’t even read it? Or if he had read it, he didn’t take it to mean I was ready to have his babies or was secretly in love with him and playing it cool. I told myself not to linger over not hearing from him for weeks; I’d heard about the layovers the soldiers faced when they were flying back from overseas deployments. It wasn’t like they had nonstop flights. When I wasn’t telling myself not to overthink our last IM session and worry I’d never hear from him again, I told myself that if I never heard from him again, I would be fine.
But every time I thought of never hearing from him, it made my heart ache a little. More than a little. It made me feel like I had indigestion, and I’ve never had indigestion.
But I’d understand if he never contacted me again.
I would.
My sister Jasmine was a different person when she was in the middle of training for a competition coming up. Every aspect of her life changed during those periods. If he didn’t have time to be my friend once his life was back to normal on base in the States, I couldn’t hold it against him. Time was something you couldn’t just give out freely. It was precious.
So when AHALL80 flashed across my cell phone screen again with (2) next to his name, my heart practically did a shimmy I hadn’t felt since…
I wasn’t going to think about it.
I’d been worried about him. He’d been flying across an ocean. There was nothing off about being happy your friend was okay.
And that was what I was going to keep telling myself.
Forever.
Because that was all I was ever going to have, and I just needed to live with it like I’d been doing.
Setting aside my scissors and the pile of banana print I’d just finished with, I unlocked the screen and tapped on the notification icon, ignoring the spike of excitement and relief at his name on my screen.
I had this. I had this. He wouldn’t be writing me if I’d done irreparable damage to our friendship.
And that was another thing I was going to keep telling myself.
* * *
June 10, 2009
7:49 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
AHall80: I’m alive
RubyMars: Is it really you?
AHall80: Heh. Yeah.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: You hey.
AHall80: I made it back.
RubyMars: I’d hoped so. :) How was the flight and everything?
AHall80: Shit, but the thirteen hours I was stuck in Baghdad was worth it. I’m here, I don’t care.
RubyMars: That’s the spirit.
RubyMars: Did you have your beer and pizza already?
AHall80: Yeah, a few of us went out to eat right after the ceremony.
RubyMars: There’s a ceremony? I don’t remember that.
RubyMars: How many beers did you have?
RubyMars: Judgment-free zone, remember?
AHall80: After the plane landed. I only had two beers… didn’t want to go too crazy after so long.
RubyMars: Did you have a pepperoni pizza?
AHall80: Megaroni
AHall80: Deep dish
RubyMars: Party animal
AHall80: Baller
RubyMars: Lol.
RubyMars: Please tell me you had a hot shower already.
AHall80: ….
AHall80: Ruby
AHall80: Yes.
AHall80: Finished reintegration today and my friend took me to get a new phone since my truck isn’t here.
RubyMars: What did you do to the phone you had before you left?
AHall80: Canceled the service since I was leaving. No point in keeping it. Sold my phone too.
AHall80: I don’t care about having a new number. Nobody’s calling me anyway.
RubyMars: Are you messaging me on it right now?
AHall80: Nah, just got a cheapo phone. Don’t need anything fancy. I bought a new laptop. That’s what I’m on.
RubyMars: You sold your laptop too?
AHall80: Mine broke before I even deployed. Didn’t bother getting another one because the sand gets into everything. That’s why I’d message you from a computer on base.
AHall80: Got some clothes and other shit while we were out. I’m leaving for Shreveport tomorrow.
RubyMars: Are you excited?
AHall80: Yeah
RubyMars: I’m so happy for you. I’m glad you’re back.
AHall80: Me too
AHall80: How you been?
AHall80: I wanted to msg you sooner, but couldn’t because of the phone and laptop situation.
RubyMars: Good. Fine. Everything is good.
AHall80: Got more work?
RubyMars: Some. I’m doing okay on money, but I need more work. I’m not freaking out yet. You’d be proud of how well I’m handling it.
AHall80: You’ll be all right, Rube
RubyMars: :)
AHall80: Gone on another date?
RubyMars: Yeah
AHall80: So?
RubyMars: It was okay.
AHall80: With?
RubyMars: Someone else. This other guy I went on a date with like a year ago.
RubyMars: Before we became friends.
AHall80: How’d that work?
RubyMars: He’s another friend of a friend. I was at that friend’s house for her birthday and he was there and asked. I guess he’d been dating someone for about a year, but they broke up. I said yes. Went on it.
AHall80: What happened?
RubyMars: What do you mean?
AHall80: Did something happen on the date?
RubyMars: …
RubyMars: Am I that obvious?
AHall80: You’ve been messaging me for months. Yeah.
AHall80: What happened?
RubyMars: Nothing bad.
RubyMars: He kissed me and tried to take it further than I’d intended.
RubyMars: Did you know some guys think after one date it’s time to get down?
AHall80: Get down?
AHall80: Ruby
AHall80: Did he try to force you?
RubyMars: Force me, no. He just… expected it. Like taking me to the movies and a cute Italian restaurant meant I owed him something. It pissed me off is all. More at me than him.
AHall80: You didn’t do anything wrong
RubyMars: I know I didn’t. I just felt like a little kid. I didn’t even have the girls coming out of my top trying to entice him or anything.
RubyMars: I don’t know why I used the word entice.
RubyMars: Sorry for the “girls” comment. I forget you’re a guy sometimes.
AHall80: ….
RubyMars: You know what I mean.
AHall80: Yeah, yeah I know.
RubyMars: Am I the only one who didn’t know one date is the new thing? I thought it was a three-date thing before the sex was expected?
AHall80: “the sex”
AHall80: Damn it, Ruby
RubyMars: Lol, you know what I mean!
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: And yeah, that’s the new norm. You’re the only one who didn’t know.
RubyMars: Great. Thanks.
AHall80: You sure he didn’t do anything to you?
RubyMars: You’re sweet. And no, I promise. He’s still alive. He kissed me when I wasn’t expecting it and started trying to touch my little boobies (spoiler alert). I told him to stop and he did.
RubyMars: I could tell he was frustrated, but it was fine. I’m sure he’s never calling again. Not that I even want him to. He was kind of a pig.
AHall80: Good.
AHall80: You’re not missing out on anything. Fuck that guy.
RubyMars: Yeah, fuck him.
AHall80: Did you finish your profile?
RubyMars: No. I think I’m done for a while. I don’t think I’m missing out on anything awesome.
AHall80: Have you gone out again with the other guy? Your brother’s friend?
RubyMars: Him. Once. Last week.
RubyMars: Another failure.
RubyMars: I went over to his place for dinner and a movie and guess what I found?
AHall80: You went over to his place for dinner and a movie? Do you know what that means?
RubyMars: Dinner and a movie…?
AHall80:…
AHall80: No.
AHall80: The same as the three-date thing or the new one-date thing.
RubyMars: I was wondering why my mom was eyeing #4 so much when I told them where I was going.
RubyMars: That makes me feel worse that they knew what that meant. I remember my mom going to Ben’s house for dinner almost every night before they got married.
RubyMars: I could have gone without that mental picture.
AHall80: Ruby
RubyMars: I digress. I’ll brain bleach later. Guess what I found at his house?
AHall80: If you say condoms…
RubyMars: Not condoms. WTF.
RubyMars: I found women’s underwear shoved into the cushions of his couch. I was looking for the remote and ta-da! Lacey black underwear. It was straight out of a bad date movie. I couldn’t wash my hands fast enough afterward.
RubyMars: What I really want to know is, how does someone leave somewhere without their underwear on? Is that a thing? That really happens?
AHall80: …
AHall80: RC, the joy you bring to my life… I can never pay you back.
RubyMars: I’m being serious!
AHall80: I know you are :]
AHall80: I’ve never had girls’ panties lying around my place.
AHall80: …I did find some at Max’s place a few times. That is a good question though. If I couldn’t find my boxers, I’d look for them.
RubyMars: That’s what I’m saying. Underwear isn’t cheap.
AHall80: Lol
AHall80: What’d you do? Leave?
RubyMars: No. When he came back from the kitchen, I showed them to him.
AHall80: You didn’t
RubyMars: I did. I wasn’t a jerk about it, I just said “I think someone you know is missing something.” He started apologizing. He basically turned purple, stuttered for a minute straight and said they were probably his ex-girlfriend’s, blah, blah, blah.
RubyMars: “Probably his ex-girlfriend’s.” Am I that naïve?
AHall80: You’re sweet
AHall80: But a little. Not that naïve though.
RubyMars: That’s what I thought.
AHall80: And then?
RubyMars: Then it was awkward, but we ate dinner, watched the movie, and I went back to my house. He’s texted me a few times saying he’s sorry and things like that, but I’m not going out with him again.
AHall80: Didn’t like him enough to forgive him?
RubyMars: More like it’s nasty he hasn’t vacuumed his cushions since he broke up with his ex. I’m a slob. I can’t date another slob.
AHall80: …
RubyMars: :)
RubyMars: Anyway, enough about me. What about you? Any dates since you got back?
AHall80: Nah. I got other things to spend my money on right now than buying some overpriced drinks at a bar to pick somebody up.
RubyMars: Remember that time you told me it was a bad idea to pick up women at a bar?
AHall80: Har har
RubyMars: Har har, lol
Ahall80: I only got one girl I’m interested in right now.
RubyMars: Oh?
Ahall80: Lady Liberty
RubyMars: And you think I’m cheesy.
Ahall80: I’ve never said you were cheesy
RubyMars: ….
Ahall80: All right maybe once, but it was your joke that was cheesy. Not you.
RubyMars: Yeah yeah.
RubyMars: Are you getting any sleep?
AHall80: Not much, my times are screwed up.
RubyMars: Melatonin, ever heard of it?
AHall80: It’s only 7 p.m., it’s too early for sassy time.
RubyMars: :)
RubyMars: It’s never too early for sassy time.
RubyMars: I’m really glad you made it back okay.
AHall80: Me too, Rubes.
AHall80: I’ll msg you soon.
* * *
10:03 p.m. (the next day)
AHall80: Made it to Shreveport
RubyMars: Finally.
AHall80: What are you doing?
RubyMars: Watching some movie with my little sister.
RubyMars: What are you doing? I thought you’d be hanging out with your friends.
AHall80: They’re playing Need for Speed next to me.
AHall80: We went out to eat right after they picked me up.
AHall80: What movie are you watching?
RubyMars: Do they live together?
RubyMars: Killer Klowns from Outer Space
AHall80: Max and Des? No. Des is staying here tonight though. He’s already drank half a bottle of vodka.
AHall80: What the hell is that?
RubyMars: How much have you drank?
RubyMars: It’s a movie… about killer clowns from outer space, lol.
AHall80: Two beers and 1/8 of the vodka.
AHall80: I’m good.
AHall80: I guess it’s late enough for the sassy to come out?
AHall80: Is the movie like what I’m thinking it’s like?
RubyMars: I bet you’re good, lol.
RubyMars: The sass is out.
RubyMars: Are you asking if the movie is so over the top it’s hilarious with some really interesting costumes? Yes.
AHall80: Lol
RubyMars: Have fun with Max and Des. :)
* * *
2:14 a.m.
AHall80: Ruby
AHall80: U there?
RubyMars: Hey
AHall80: What do you look like?
RubyMars: Like a girl…?
AHall80: I think u shud come visit
RubyMars: Are you drunk?
AHall80: No
AHall80: Maybe
AHall80: A litl
RubyMars: Okay
AHall80: Youll come visit?
RubyMars: No, I mean, okay you’re drunk, lol.
AHall80: U wont come visit?
RubyMars: Ask me tomorrow when you aren’t plastered.
AHall80: Ur not saying no
RubyMars: I’m not saying yes either. :)
AHall80: Think about it
RubyMars: Okay
AHall80: Ur like my little sister
RubyMars: Okay
AHall80: I’m wearing the socks you sent me
RubyMars: You are?
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: I’m gonna go to sleep
RubyMars: Good idea :)
RubyMars: Night night. Sleep on your stomach.
AHall80: K nite
* * *
12:16 p.m.
AHall80: I am so damn sorry about last night
RubyMars: What are you talking about?
AHall80: The messages I sent
RubyMars: What messages?
AHall80: The drunk ones
RubyMars: What drunk ones?
AHall80: ….
AHall80: You responded to them
RubyMars: I KNOW
RubyMars: LOL
RubyMars: Just wanted to mess with you.
AHall80: …
AHall80: I drank too much
RubyMars: I could tell :)
AHall80: Sorry
RubyMars: You don’t have anything to be sorry about. You aren’t the first person to text me drunk.
RubyMars: You know who else texted me drunk last night?
AHall80: Who?
RubyMars: That guy I went on a date with. Panties-in-the-couch guy.
RubyMars: He was all “sory bout the othe nite. Ur just rly pretty.”
AHall80: What’d you tell him?
RubyMars: I didn’t respond, lol.
AHall80: Who else drunk texts you?
RubyMars: Everyone. My brothers, my sister, my friends. They know I’m awake so they do it.
RubyMars: What are you doing today?
AHall80: Nothing. They’re all hungover.
RubyMars: And you’re not?
AHall80: Nah
RubyMars: Liar.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: Yeah, I’m lying. I got a headache.
AHall80: I don’t think I’ll ever be able to smell vodka the same way again
RubyMars: Lol
RubyMars: I’m not going to say that’s what you get, but…
AHall80: That’s what I get.
AHall80: Har har
AHall80: I read what I wrote you a minute ago, sorry for being weird.
RubyMars: It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean anything by it.
AHall80: Not that I don’t want to meet you
RubyMars: I get it. People say stuff when they’re drunk.
AHall80: Yeah they do
AHall80: But I wouldn’t mind meeting you.
RubyMars: …are you still drunk?
AHall80: No
AHall80: For real
RubyMars: Maybe one day. :)
RubyMars: When are you leaving for Scotland?
AHall80: In a few days. On the 18th.
RubyMars: I meant to e-mail you. You should look into getting waterproof shoes or boots for your trip. I watched this episode on one of the travel channels that they filmed there and they talked about how unpredictable the weather was. Rainy one minute, blue skies the next.
AHall80: Huh
AHall80: That’s not a bad idea.
RubyMars: Maybe take a rain jacket too.
AHall80: Yeah, good idea. I’ll see if I can buy some boots today to give me some time to break them in.
RubyMars: Yeah, you don’t want to end up with blisters while you’re over there. :)
AHall80: Yeah.
AHall80: I’m going to head out. I’ll msg you later.
* * *
9:22 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey
RubyMars: How was your day?
AHall80: Fine
AHall80: Just got back from a run to the store, glad to be done with that
RubyMars: What store?
AHall80: The big store
RubyMars: “The big store.” That narrows it down.
RubyMars: Why do I feel like there’s more to this story?
AHall80: Heh
AHall80: Nothing happened. It just made me realize how many things I don’t miss after a year away.
RubyMars: What else haven’t you missed?
AHall80: Traffic
AHall80: People with problems that aren’t really problems
RubyMars: :)
RubyMars: I wanted to ask but didn’t want to ask, are you handling being back fine so far?
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: Mostly
AHall80: My first two tours, not really, but I’ve gotten better. When we get back, we have to go through reintegration and they take it seriously. We have to take a class on identifying signs of depression and PTSD. I’m lucky and haven’t had either happen yet. Worst thing for me is big crowds. I can’t handle them anymore. Loud noises don’t do me any good either.
RubyMars: Who really likes being squished in with a ton of people willingly anyway?
AHall80: :]
RubyMars: Are you doing anything tomorrow?
AHall80: My brother was asking if I wanted to go to NOLA with him for a couple days.
AHall80: It isn’t mardi gras, so I should be good to not step in any shit.
RubyMars: You think you’re so funny, don’t you?
AHall80: Are you laughing?
RubyMars: No
AHall80: Liar.
RubyMars: BYE
* * *
June 16th
2:21 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey you
AHall80: Sorry I went MIA
RubyMars: It’s okay. I assumed you were busy.
AHall80: I went to Max’s parents’ lake house. Didn’t realize there was no service until I got there.
RubyMars: I thought you were going to go to New Orleans and not step in crap with your brother?
AHall80: I like my brother, but two days with him? Nah.
RubyMars: Did you have fun at the lake house at least?
AHall80: It was nice, quiet and there was AC. It was good.
RubyMars: It’s the little things in life. :)
AHall80: Now I’m rushing to get my stuff together for my trip.
RubyMars: Did you end up buying boots?
AHall80: I did, so did Des. Max didn’t. Don’t know about everyone else.
RubyMars: ….
AHall80: I know. When he starts complaining, I get to say I told you so.
RubyMars: Lol. Yeah you do.
RubyMars: Hopefully the weather is great the entire time you’re there, but… :)
AHall80: If I don’t talk to you before I leave in two days, I’ll e-mail you when I can.
RubyMars: Okay. Have fun!
RubyMars: Enjoy your vacation for the both of us.
AHall80: I will. :]
AHall80: Bye, RC.
* * *
12:33 a.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey.
RubyMars: What are you doing awake?
AHall80: I’m pissed
RubyMars: Want to talk about it?
AHall80: There’s nothing to talk about.
AHall80: I’m sorry
AHall80: You didn’t do anything.
AHall80: Max’s sister broke her arm and her friend broke her leg.
RubyMars: Max’s sister’s friend…
AHall80: They were both going to Scotland with us as a graduation present.
RubyMars: When did it happen? We just talked like 6 hours ago.
AHall80: An hour after I messaged you.
RubyMars: Oh crap. Are they all right?
AHall80: They’re alive and fine besides the broken elbow and leg…
RubyMars: What happened?
AHall80: Someone T-boned them in a car wreck.
RubyMars: That’s terrible.
RubyMars: Wait
RubyMars: Does that mean they can’t go?
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: That’s why I’m so….
AHall80: The friend can’t walk, and they said Max’s sister might need surgery. If she doesn’t go, Max won’t either.
AHall80: I know it’s selfish to be so mad about some girl breaking her leg and Max’s little sister, who I’ve known forever, getting hurt on accident, but I’m not happy.
RubyMars: Maybe it’s a little selfish but you’re entitled to feel that way. You deserve your vacation.
RubyMars: I’m sorry, Aaron. That really sucks.
RubyMars: Your other friends are still going with you, right? Either way, plenty of people travel alone. I have a friend my age who’s always going places by herself and she’s five foot four, maybe one forty, not a big, strapping soldier like you.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: I’ll msg you later. I got a pounding headache.
RubyMars: Okay. Hope you feel better. Sorry about everything.
* * *
1:45 a.m.
AHall80: I’m not really pissed
RubyMars: Of course you’re not.
RubyMars: And you’re still awake.
AHall80: ….
AHall80: Can’t sleep.
AHall80: I’m disappointed. There’s worst shit in the world than not being able to go on vacation.
AHall80: You’d figure I’d be used to things not working out.
RubyMars: There’s nothing wrong with being disappointed. I’d be disappointed too.
RubyMars: I’d probably cry.
RubyMars: Okay, that last comment of yours makes me want to cry.
RubyMars: You can still go on vacation though, even if Max doesn’t.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: Don’t cry. I’m feeling sorry for myself and not handling this like I should. It’s a sorry-ass excuse, but I’m tired.
AHall80: What are you doing?
RubyMars: Watching TV
RubyMars: Eating donuts.
RubyMars: It’s been a long day.
AHall80: You too?
AHall80: Bad day?
RubyMars: No. Not really. I went to my brother’s place to pick up my mom’s carpet cleaner earlier for her and his best friend was there.
AHall80: The asshole you were hung up on?
RubyMars: That one. I hadn’t seen him in a while, and I guess you must have planted some bugs in my head because I saw him and just got pissed off.
AHall80: At him or yourself?
RubyMars: Both. Mostly him. It’s your fault. All I can think now is that he was the older one and he should’ve let me off the hook instead of letting me… forget it. It’s over. It’s stupid to be mad about it.
AHall80: No it’s not.
RubyMars: :)
AHall80: It isn’t. He was a dick. You have a reason to be mad at him for leading you on. How much older is he?
RubyMars: 6 years
RubyMars: He’s the same age as you I guess.
AHall80: Maybe, but I grew up by the time I was 22
AHall80: For the most part
AHall80: Did you say anything to him?
RubyMars: Only hi. I was too busy going back and forth between calling myself an idiot and calling him an idiot in my head, and trying to count all the things about him I don’t like.
AHall80: He’s got a lazy eye or something?
RubyMars: Lol, no. His clothes are too tight. There’s that.
AHall80: You don’t want to date anybody who wears clothes tighter than yours.
RubyMars: I know!
RubyMars: His hair is too long too. :) And he has crappy taste in movies.
AHall80: :]
RubyMars: I got out of there as quick as I could. My brother texted me while I was driving home asking what had been my deal. I told him I was fine, but I’m still a little mad just thinking about it all.
RubyMars: Now I’m really ready to move on with my life. I’ve wasted enough time being dumb over people who don’t deserve my time.
AHall80: That’s what I said.
RubyMars: …you also told me to go to church to find a boyfriend, lol.
AHall80: I don’t get what your deal with that is. It could work.
RubyMars: In your dreams.
RubyMars: Then there was you telling me to volunteer at a shelter.
AHall80: Heh
AHall80: Good thing you ignored me
RubyMars: You made me feel better, thank you.
AHall80: I owe you, stalker girl.
RubyMars: I’m keeping tabs, don’t worry.
RubyMars: We can be here for each other.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: Gotta go. Msg you soon.
* * *
12:02 p.m.
AHall80: You there?
RubyMars: Yeah, hey.
RubyMars: I just woke up a little while ago.
RubyMars: So…
AHall80: ?
RubyMars: Did you hear anything else about Max or his sister?
AHall80: No.
RubyMars: No you didn’t hear anything about either of them or no he isn’t going?
AHall80: No I haven’t heard anything about her or from him.
RubyMars: :( I’m sorry
AHall80: Not your fault
RubyMars: I told you, you can go by yourself if Des and the other guy flake. Scottish people are supposed to be really friendly. I’m sure Max wouldn’t want you to not go because he can’t.
AHall80: That’s what I heard.
AHall80: You’d be surprised. He’s petty.
RubyMars: Go anyway.
RubyMars: Have you gone to see your dad?
RubyMars: Why don’t you ask your brother or your sister to go? I’m not sure if that’s possible since it’s so last minute….
AHall80: I did go see them, but no. We don’t get along that well.
RubyMars: I see.
AHall80: It was good seeing them. I told them I’d come by again when I get back.
RubyMars: I’ve got my fingers crossed for you. You’ll figure something out.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: Msg you soon
* * *
6:09 p.m.
AHall80: Guess we’re going without Max.
RubyMars: I’m sorry.
AHall80: It’s all right. I’m not going to not go just because he can’t. I can’t just take time off whenever.
RubyMars: I agree.
RubyMars: Still sorry though. I’m sure you’ll have a great time with Des and your other friend.
AHall80: Yeah, it’ll work.
RubyMars: :)
* * *
8:08 p.m.
AHall80: Leaving for the airport in a minute
AHall80: Got a long drive
AHall80: I’ve been trying not to be in a shit mood but failing at it
RubyMars: It’s okay. It isn’t uncalled for.
RubyMars: Have fun though and relax.
RubyMars: Send me pictures.
AHall80: All right I will
AHall80: Be safe, RC
RubyMars: You too.
* * *
June 19th
2:01 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
AHall80: I made it
RubyMars: Hey.
RubyMars: Did you have a decent flight?
AHall80: Two flights.
AHall80: They were good. We got to stretch out a little in economy since Max and his sister/friend couldn’t go.
RubyMars: That’s good. :)
RubyMars: Did you get any sightseeing done today?
AHall80: A little. We saw something called Scott’s Monument and walked around this park. Went to some place called the Royal Mile and saw the castle from outside.
AHall80: The line to get in was too long, so we didn’t go.
RubyMars: Boo.
RubyMars: Besides that, everything sounds fun.
AHall80: The Internet at this hotel is too slow. I’ll send you pictures another day.
RubyMars: Your tour thing starts tomorrow?
AHall80: Yeah. 5 days.
RubyMars: Lucky.
AHall80: You all right?
RubyMars: Yes. Working.
RubyMars: Trying to work, you know what I mean. Making things I can’t sell yet. Trying to finish the jobs I have before I leave in a few weeks.
AHall80: You’ll sell them.
RubyMars: I like your optimism.
RubyMars: I’m acting like my sister, I’m sorry.
AHall80: What’s going on with your sister anyway?
RubyMars: She’s still hiding that she’s training. I don’t get why, but whatever. My mom is still paying her dues so she can skate even though “she isn’t” and we all know she’s a big, fat liar.
RubyMars: I don’t get it. I really don’t. But I still love her anyway.
AHall80: What don’t you get? Why she isn’t skating?
RubyMars: Yes. She doesn’t get it. She doesn’t remember how tight money was for a while with the rest of us. My mom wouldn’t have been able to afford putting the rest of us into any kind of lessons, but by the time Jazz wanted to skate, my older brother and sister were already out of the house, that’s the only reason why she could. She doesn’t get how lucky she is. I tried telling her once a couple years ago, but she didn’t get it.
RubyMars: One Christmas, I asked my mom for roller skates and she couldn’t buy them for me because she didn’t have the money and didn’t want to ask my dad to buy them.
RubyMars: Jazz doesn’t know about any of that.
RubyMars: After my heart thing, there was a while where my mom wouldn’t let me participate in my school’s field day. I was the only kid who couldn’t. She doesn’t get how lucky she is. I love her so much, and usually we get along really well when she has time to hang out, but sometimes she drives me crazy with how self-centered she can be.
RubyMars: That was longer than I thought. I guess it bothers me more than I think it does. Sorry.
AHall80: I’m sorry, Ru.
AHall80: I get why that would piss you off.
AHall80: Tell her.
RubyMars: Maybe.
RubyMars: :)
RubyMars: Changing the subject. Have you gotten any sleep?
AHall80: Yeah, it’s been easier than when I was back home. The time zones aren’t so different.
RubyMars: Good. Are you sharing a room with someone?
AHall80: Nah. I was supposed to with Des, but since Max isn’t here, I got my own and Des gets the room the girls were supposed to share.
RubyMars: I know it sucks, but that is nice.
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: Trying not to be a shit about it
RubyMars: Too late. :)
AHall80: Har har
AHall80: I’m going to bed. Msg you again when I can.
RubyMars: Okay, have fun, stalker.
AHall80: Night, Rubes.
* * *
June 20th
3:15 p.m.
AHall80: What are you up to?
RubyMars: Hi stranger.
RubyMars: Just finished arguing with my sister.
RubyMars: No biggie.
AHall80: With your little sister?
RubyMars: Yes.
RubyMars: My big sister is sane.
AHall80: What happened?
RubyMars: We were eating lunch when she started complaining about how much she hates her job and is so tired of everything. Literally, everything. She complained about how hard her mattress is and how she’s hoping to talk my mom into buying her a new one. I think that’s what drove me the most crazy.
AHall80: Keep going
RubyMars: So I told her that her mattress is newer than mine and how if she wants a new one she should just save up money at her “shitty job that pays her $10.50 an hour” and buy another one because it isn’t like she pays rent or insurance or anything.
RubyMars: It was like another person was using my mouth to talk to her, Aaron. I’ve never talked to my sister like that. I don’t think I’ve ever talked to anyone like that.
AHall80: For real?
RubyMars: For real. She got so pissed after the shock wore off. She said I don’t understand what she goes through and how her life isn’t as easy as everyone thinks it is. I don’t think her life is easy. I know how hard she works. So then we started arguing about that.
RubyMars: Then, I told her she needed to quit acting like a brat and either get back on the ice or not so Mom wouldn’t keep paying for her coach if she didn’t have to. I know I got to her because all she did was look at me and storm out.
RubyMars: I feel bad for saying all that, but not really.
RubyMars: My stomach hurt and I sweated a whole bunch the entire time. That was the meanest thing I’ve ever done.
AHall80: That wasn’t mean. That was tough love. She needed to hear it from somebody.
RubyMars: Thank you for telling me that. I still feel bad.
AHall80: Don’t.
AHall80: I’m proud of you. That took guts.
RubyMars: It did.
RubyMars: :)
AHall80: When I first started getting promoted, it was hard for me to be tough on these guys that I’d known who weren’t moving up. I didn’t know how to treat them or act because I didn’t want to step on their toes. At the end of the day, you know you got to get things done even if you’re pissing somebody off. You just figure it out with time. Sometimes you have to stop and finally make your point… like you did with your aunt.
RubyMars: What you’re trying to say is that you’re bossy now?
AHall80: I’m used to people listening to me.
RubyMars: That sounds about right. :)
AHall80: ….
RubyMars: Have you always been bossy?
AHall80: When I know what I want and think I can do it better than someone else.
RubyMars: I’ll take that as a yes.
RubyMars: I’m not. We balance each other out. It isn’t a bad thing.
AHall80: You’re bossy when you want to be.
RubyMars: Sometimes, but it’s rare.
AHall80: Sure
RubyMars: Like you said, when I know what I want.
AHall80: And in the middle of the night when you’re in a mood.
RubyMars: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
AHall80: Sure
RubyMars: ….
RubyMars: I’m logging off now.
AHall80: Lol
RubyMars: How was your day? What’d you do?
AHall80: Got picked up early for the tour. We stopped in a town called Dunkeld, I think it was called, stopped in an old pine forest, walked around a loch… that’s what they call a lake… with some old castle in the middle of it. Checked out Loch Ness, and we’re staying in this town called Ullapool for two nights.
RubyMars: You went to Loch Ness????
AHall80: Yeah, the water is so dark, it looks like coffee.
RubyMars: Jealous.
AHall80: You’d love it.
RubyMars: :) Now you have to live your life for me too, mister.
RubyMars: I wouldn’t be doing my own thing if it wasn’t for you, so I’m doing my part living my life for you too.
AHall80: :]
RubyMars: Thank you for being such a good friend to me.
AHall80: :]
RubyMars: You there?
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: I’m taking pictures while I’m here. I’ll send them to you when I can.
RubyMars: Deal.
AHall80: Gonna hit the sack., We’re getting picked up at 8.
AHall80: Night, Ru.
RubyMars: Goodnight, have fun.
* * *
June 21st
2:57 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey.
RubyMars: How was your day?
AHall80: All right. Saw some castle ruins and checked out a bay and a village.
RubyMars: Was it pretty?
AHall80: Yeah
AHall80: Just got back from dinner.
RubyMars: Was it good?
AHall80: Yeah, Des and Ian stayed at a pub by the hotel. I wasn’t in the mood to drink.
AHall80: I’d rather be in my room
RubyMars: Are you okay?
AHall80: Just got a lot on my mind lately.
RubyMars: You know you can always talk to me about anything.
AHall80: I know, Ru
AHall80: Being in the van all day here just gave me a lot of time to think about things
AHall80: I’ll sort it out.
RubyMars: Yes you will.
RubyMars: Everything will work out.
AHall80: :]
AHall80: I’m going to hit the sack.
AHall80: Have a good rest of your day, Ruron.
RubyMars: Night, stalker.
* * *
June 23rd
12:11 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hi.
RubyMars: How’s the vacay going?
AHall80: :]
AHall80: Good
AHall80: The hotel we’re staying at doesn’t have Wi-Fi. We’re eating dinner right now
AHall80: This town is called Portree
RubyMars: Eat your dinner then.
RubyMars: Wait, how are you messaging me?
AHall80: Eating as I type
AHall80: Borrowed Des phone. He’s using mine to call his girl. I got an international plan for calls before I left.
RubyMars: To call all your girlfriends while you’re over there?
AHall80: ….
AHall80: No. In case Max called.
RubyMars: I see.
RubyMars: What’d you see today?
AHall80: You’d be in heaven.
RubyMars: Tell me every detail.
AHall80: We’re in Skye today. We stopped at this place called the… I can’t spell it… Quiraing… Ian says that’s how it’s spelled… most beautiful place I’ve ever seen. Got to hike about half the trail. It was rainy and really cloudy, but the longer we walked the more the clouds went away and you could see these lakes, lochs whatever they’re called… Never seen anything so amazing in my life. Like I was on a different planet. Saw a waterfall, had a walk through another place called the fairy pools, another castle ruin, a cemetery…
AHall80: Wish you could have seen it.
RubyMars: :) As long as you had fun, that’s good enough for me.
AHall80: Had to do most of the fairy pools walk by myself because these lazy asses didn’t want to.
AHall80: I jumped into one of the pools and froze my ass off. Got tons of pictures.
RubyMars: Good. Send them to me.
AHall80: Des is off the phone.
AHall80: I’ll msg you when I can.
RubyMars: Okay. Have fun.
AHall80: Bye, Ruron
* * *
June 24th
12:09 p.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey you.
RubyMars: How was your day?
AHall80: Good
AHall80: Saw this castle called… I wrote it down… Eilean Donan castle, stopped in a town called Fort William and checked out this place called Glencoe.
RubyMars: You had fun?
AHall80: I wouldn’t say fun, but it was good.
RubyMars: What’s wrong?
AHall80: Just wishing things would have worked out better for this trip.
AHall80: Hate thinking like that.
RubyMars: I’m sorry, Aaron.
RubyMars: Hopefully you can go on another trip with Max sometime in the future.
AHall80: It’s not even that.
AHall80: About to head out for dinner. I’ll msg you before bed.
RubyMars: Okay, have a good dinner.
AHall80: :]
* * *
4:33 p.m.
AHall80: You there?
RubyMars: I’m always here.
RubyMars: Unless it’s the butt crack of dawn.
RubyMars: What did you have for dinner?
AHall80: Fish n chips
AHall80: I’ve been thinking
RubyMars: What brought this miracle on?
AHall80: I wish you could’ve come with me
AHall80: You there?
RubyMars: I’m here, sorry.
RubyMars: I didn’t mean to give you a guilt trip about going to Scotland.
AHall80: You didn’t.
AHall80: Just wish you could’ve come too.
RubyMars: :)That’s really nice of you. I wish I could have too.
AHall80: I’ve been thinking about it a lot
RubyMars: When is your flight back?
AHall80: Tomorrow
AHall80: You gone on another date?
RubyMars: No.
RubyMars: You?
AHall80: Nah
AHall80: I’m sleepy
RubyMars: Then go to bed. :)
RubyMars: Did you drink too much tonight?
AHall80: Yeah
RubyMars: Lol
AHall80: :)
RubyMars: That’s the first real smiley face you’ve given me.
AHall80: Nah
AHall80: You haven’t seen the rest
RubyMars: Go to bed.
AHall80: Ok
AHall80: Night
RubyMars: Goodnight, Ruron.
AHall80: Bye
* * *
June 25th
1:23 a.m.
AHall80: About to check out of the hotel, just wanted to say bye.
RubyMars: Good morning to you.
RubyMars: Okay. Have a safe flight home. Enjoy your extra space on the plane.
AHall80: I will
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey
AHall80: Never mind I’ll msg you when I get home.
AHall80: Go to bed
RubyMars: Yes, Mommy Aaron.
RubyMars: :) Be safe.
AHall80: You too.
* * *
June 27th
1:54 a.m.
AHall80: I figured it out
RubyMars: Hi to you.
RubyMars: Glad you made it home safely, lol.
RubyMars: What did you figure out?
AHall80: Why don’t you come with me?
AHall80: Ruby?
AHall80: You there?
RubyMars: I’m here.
AHall80: …
RubyMars: I dropped my phone sorry.
AHall80: Did you see my message?
RubyMars: That’s why I dropped my phone. You want me to go with you… where?
AHall80: To Florida
RubyMars: ….
RubyMars: You want me to go with you to Florida?
AHall80: Yeah
RubyMars: I’m just trying to understand. Why do you want me to go with you?
AHall80: I want to meet you. You said you wanted to meet me…
AHall80: Unless you don’t
RubyMars: I do
RubyMars: I do!
RubyMars: You just caught me totally off guard is all.
AHall80: Come with us.
RubyMars: You keep saying that.
AHall80: Because I want you to
RubyMars: I thought Max was going with you to Florida?
AHall80: He is
AHall80: He doesn’t feel bad going there
RubyMars: But you want me to go too?
AHall80: Yeah
RubyMars: Why? Because you want to meet up?
AHall80: Yeah…
RubyMars: But why?
AHall80: Because what’s the point in waiting? It’ll be a while before I get more time off.
AHall80: Come with
RubyMars: Maybe you aren’t thinking about this clearly.
AHall80: I am.
RubyMars: Mmm-hmm… I don’t think you are.
AHall80: Why?
RubyMars: Because.
AHall80: Why?
RubyMars: Because!
RubyMars: You can’t just decide overnight you want to meet me all of a sudden.
RubyMars: I’m leaving in less than two weeks to visit my dad.
AHall80: There’s no “all of a sudden.”
AHall80: And I didn’t decide that overnight
AHall80: I’ve been thinking about it a lot
AHall80: What’s the problem?
AHall80: You’re leaving after I have to be back from Florida.
AHall80: You there?
RubyMars: I’m here.
RubyMars: I just… what if I get on your nerves? Maybe you won’t like me in person.
RubyMars: You’re not exactly asking me to have dinner with you and your friends. You’re inviting me to go to a beach house with you and people you’ve known for a long time for multiple days, right?
AHall80: Your argument right now is that you might get on my nerves?
RubyMars: We’ve never met!
AHall80: So
AHall80: You said you love Florida.
AHall80: And you know I’d like to meet you. I’d thought next time I came down to Louisiana, we could meet up… all it is is sooner. We’ve known each other for almost a year.
AHall80: I don’t see a point in waiting
RubyMars: Yeah, but…
RubyMars: This isn’t us meeting up at a coffee shop or something.
AHall80: We wouldn’t have met at a coffee shop
RubyMars: Why not? We could before you went back to base.
AHall80: No.
RubyMars: ….
AHall80: We could’ve met at a comic con if there was one going on
RubyMars: You’re killing me.
AHall80: Why?
RubyMars: Because you know me too well.
AHall80: That’s a problem?
RubyMars: ….no
RubyMars: I want to meet you. I really do, but going to a beach house with you is a big step.
AHall80: Why?
RubyMars: I already told you. We’ve never met.
AHall80: In person
AHall80: I don’t think we’re strangers. You know more about me than just about anyone I spent a year with in Iraq. More than most people I know in general, Rubes.
AHall80: I like you. You like me. What’s the problem?
RubyMars: I didn’t even know for sure you’d been in Iraq, Aaron.
RubyMars: I hadn’t even known until right before you flew back that you were even based in Kentucky.
RubyMars: I get why you didn’t tell me until now. I would’ve done the same, but….
AHall80: You know now.
RubyMars: This is crazy.
AHall80: Do you think it is?
AHall80: Maybe a little.
AHall80: It’s fine
RubyMars: Maybe a little?
RubyMars: The sad part is that I don’t think it’s as crazy as I should. My mom would kill me for not immediately telling you no.
RubyMars: This giant part of me wants to tell you yeah, I’ll go. But… we barely know each other.
RubyMars: You know what I mean.
AHall80: We know each other.
RubyMars: You know we know each other. I know we know each other, but nobody else knows or gets that.
RubyMars: We’ve never met.
RubyMars: It would be like… an arranged marriage where we meet on the day of the wedding.
RubyMars: I thought…
AHall80: So?
AHall80: I’m asking you, not anybody else. I wouldn’t ask anybody else. Only you.
AHall80: Who says we don’t know each other?
RubyMars: I don’t know… society?
RubyMars: But what if I get on your nerves?
RubyMars: We’ve never even talked on the phone.
RubyMars: I don’t even know what you look like.
RubyMars: I think I’m freaking out.
AHall80: I doubt you’ll get on my nerves more than anybody else I’ve ever known.
AHall80: ….I can send you a picture. You never asked for one.
AHall80: Stop freaking out. You know me.
RubyMars: !!!!!!
RubyMars: I know I know you.
AHall80: Call me
RubyMars: Wut
AHall80: Call me. I’ll know the instant I talk to you if I can put up with you for a week.
RubyMars: Put up with me…
AHall80: You know what I mean
RubyMars: ….
RubyMars: I think you should think about this more.
AHall80: I have thought about it.
AHall80: The entire flight back from Scotland
AHall80: Most of the time I was in the bus
AHall80: I’ve thought about it, Ruby.
RubyMars: Maybe you should sleep on it.
RubyMars: This is crazy. This is really crazy.
AHall80: I already did.
AHall80: You keep saying that.
AHall80: You want to come to Florida.
RubyMars: You’re stealing my words.
RubyMars: You’re a pain.
RubyMars: Why am I not telling you no?
AHall80: Because you want to meet me too
AHall80: Because we’re friends and we were going to meet one day.
RubyMars: !!!!!
RubyMars: Sleep on it tonight, and if tomorrow you wake up and you still want to talk on the phone and see if we’d get along, I’ll call you.
RubyMars: I can’t believe I just typed that.
RubyMars: My hands are shaking.
RubyMars: I should feel like the stupid girl in a horror movie who goes on a date with a serial killer right now because I’m not telling you no.
AHall80: It’s just me, Rubes.
AHall80: But fine. I’ll sleep on it
AHall80: I gotta know ASAP. We start driving there the day after tomorrow.
AHall80: You could just fly and I could get you from the airport.
RubyMars: You’re already making plans….
RubyMars: No hard feelings at all if you change your mind.
AHall80: All right. Deal.
RubyMars: Deal.
* * *
11:58 a.m.
AHall80: Hey
RubyMars: Hey
AHall80: 270-555-5025
RubyMars: ….
AHall80: That’s my number. Call me.
RubyMars: Did you even think about it??
AHall80: That’s why I’m giving you my number.
AHall80: You said sometimes you know immediately if you hit it off with somebody. We get along already on messenger. I’m not worried.
RubyMars: …..
RubyMars: Are you serious?
AHall80: Yeah. Call me right now.
RubyMars: Do you know what you’re asking of me?
RubyMars: I’m still asleep, aren’t I?
AHall80: For sure.
AHall80: You’re awake. Call me.
RubyMars: You’re sure?
AHall80: Yes. Call.
RubyMars: Fine, but if there’s awkward silence and we never recover from this, I’ll never forgive you. We had a good thing, you and me.
AHall80: It’s too early for the sass to be out.
RubyMars: ……
RubyMars: I barely slept thanks to you.
RubyMars: You better answer the phone and that better not be one of those numbers you give strangers when you don’t want them to know your real number. I’ll never get over it.
AHall80: Just call, Rubes.