Chapter 8
January
January 7, 2009
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 7, 12:01 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Stuff
Ruby,
I can’t wait until I’m out of here... It’s finally hitting me hard. This happens every tour, but this time it’s worse than usual and happening earlier. Everyone’s been on edge lately. We got woke up two days ago when someone started shouting by the tents in the middle of the night. A soldier had his AR with him and was pacing… ranting and yelling… crying…. I don’t know how to describe what it was like exactly. Scary if I’m going to be honest. Everybody’s cried at least once when they’re out here… It’s just the way it works. When the homesickness gets bad or when things are happening back home, that’s “normal,” but not like that. Not like that soldier. Like there’s no hope left. I don’t know. I could go the rest of my life without seeing that happen again. It really fucks with my head seeing in person how close everybody can be to reaching that breaking point when you’re out here… you try not to think about it, but it happens. You’re fine until… you’re not. And you always kind of worry and wonder if it’ll happen to you.
I can tell you’re trustworthy, Ru. :]
I haven’t contacted my exes. Chances are I won’t. I’ve thought about it. I don’t want to spend my time calling them because I don’t have any other way of communicating. I doubt I scarred any of them. It wasn’t like we were in love or anything.
^^^Does that sound like a shit excuse?
What’s wrong with meeting a guy at church?
Like I told you, just because I’m done doesn’t mean you need to be. Maybe you’ll find a good relationship. I hope you do.
If you wouldn’t mind sending some flea shampoo, I can pay you back when I get home on break. I’d ask a friend, but it’d be a month before they got around to it.
Your entire family is out of control. Who brings jello shots to Christmas and then gets drunk? For real, I think I was jealous for a sec. The picture of your brother was hilarious. Did you that draw the “tick” on his face?
Talking bad to your sister is how you get her to do things? I can see someone with a strict diet taking their anger out on food.
I just want to do a whole lot of nothing for those two weeks of RR leave. I want to take a real vacation once I’m back home for good.
I hope you’re feeling better.
-Aaron
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 14, 2009 1:11 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Hey
Ruby,
I haven’t heard from you. You all right?
-A
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 18, 2009 2:09 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Hey
Ruby,
Everything good?
-Aaron
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 22, 2009 1:55 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Please read
Ruby,
If I did or said something to make you mad, I’m sorry. At least let me know you’re all right.
-A
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.com
Date: January 23, 2009 12:44 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.mil
Subject: RE: Please read
Sorry for scaring you. I’m really sick but mostly alive. Dropped my phone in the toilet on New Year’s and hadn’t gotten a new one.
Happy belated 29th birthday. I meant to send you a message but hope you understand.
-R
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 24, 2009 12:58 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Finally
I was worried. What happened?
Don’t worry about it. Thank you. I don’t make a big deal about it.
-Aaron
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.com
Date: January 25, 2009 1:05 a.m.
To: [email protected]mail.mil
Subject: Dying a Little
A cold turned into bronchitis then pneumonia. I know I’ll live, but it doesn’t feel like it. Feels like I died and somebody did a Buffy and pulled me back from the dead but only halfway.
Really sorry for scaring you. I’ve been too sick to do anything and my phone busting didn’t help. Finally got my sister to go buy me a new one.
Missed our e-mails. Hope you’re okay.
-R
P.S. ^^ Buffy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 27, 2009 2:22 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: Not allowed
Ruby,
I’ve missed hearing from you too. I thought I did something to make you not want to write anymore.
How do you get bronchitis and pneumonia? Did you go to the doctor?
Hang in there. Sorry you’re feeling so bad.
-A
P.S. I know who Buffy is. I watched it a few times. She was hot.
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.com
Date: January 27, 2009 5:55 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.mil
Subject: RE: Not allowed
A,
You didn’t do anything wrong. Even typing this exhausts me. I’m so weak. Lost fifteen pounds. Everything hurts.
Don’t know what got me sick, but I waited too long to go to the doctor. My whole family was worried I would die in my sleep.
Are you okay?
-Ruby
P.S. She was hot.
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 28, 2009 12:18 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: RE: RE: Not allowed
Ruby,
How do you lose 15 pounds in a month? That’s a lot of weight. You’re not helping me worry about you any less with your “they were all worried I would die in my sleep” BS.
I’m fine. Same old crap as usual. I’m too busy wondering how you’re doing. Can’t you die from pneumonia?
Eat chicken noodle soup and drink a lot of water.
-Aaron
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.com
Date: January 28, 2009 3:28 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.mil
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Not allowed
My brother the marine has been calling me Skeletor. You know how some people say they could afford to lose ten pounds? I could’ve done maybe ten. Not fifteen. The scariest part is I’m not hungry. I’m always hungry.
I told you my family is overprotective. They’re all worry warts. Any time I get sick, they all try to stand vigil. They were trying to get me to wear a mask… in my room.
You can die from pneumonia if you’re older or don’t get treatment. Don’t worry. I’m taking my medicine and trying everything everyone is telling me to do to boost my immune system. It just feels like I’m starting at -100 now. Got out of breath going downstairs. I’ve been brushing my teeth sitting down. Pathetic.
My brother’s boyfriend has brought over chicken noodle soup twice. Organic everything. No wonder I love him.
How’s Ax?
Aren’t you going on leave soon?
-R
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.mil
Date: January 31, 2009 12:01 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.com
Subject: EAT
Ruby,
Your brother calling you Skeletor isn’t helping any. You eating now?
Wear a mask in your room? Really? Are they like that with everyone or just you?
Is there anything I can do?
Ax is fine. I’m sending you a pic. She looks like a new dog. She slept with me last night.
I’m supposed to be leaving next week, but I’m not holding my breath. I won’t believe it until I’m on the transport. I’ve got this feeling… We’ll see.
-Aaron
P.S. Eat something.
P.P.S Eat a lot of something… anything.
* * *
From: [email protected]mail.com
Date: January 31, 2009 4:05 p.m.
To: [email protected]mail.mil
Subject: Not Hungry
My appetite isn’t totally back but it’s getting there. I had toast twice today. I’d step on a scale, but I don’t want to. Please don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay.
Yes, wear a mask, lol. No, they’re only like that with me. It makes me feel special sometimes… at least not when it drives me crazy. I had to take medicine for a while. I had surgery a few years ago and that just made them more watchful and worrisome. I’m fine, but… I can’t cough without one of them freaking out. I’m not complaining, I swear. I’m lucky they love me and care.
Writing me when you can is good enough. It keeps me company since I can’t do anything except marathon shows my brothers have on DVD.
Ax looks like a brand-new dog. She’s so cute. Send more pictures.
I hope you get your leave. If I don’t hear from you until you get back, have fun and enjoy your plumbing.
-Ruby
P.S. I put some butter on the toast.