With my head still resting on his chest, I ask, “What made you decide to come back?”
His fingers that were running up and down the indents of my spine stop moving. But his warm hand remains resting on my skin. “I don’t think I would’ve stayed away, but when I talked to Trey, he said something …”
I hum. “Oh?”
“Yeah. He said that I can either walk away, let it be over, or I could fight and find my way back to you—back to us.”
“That’s all I ever wanted,” I admit, “was for you to come back to me. But the way I went about it, what I did …” With my arm draped over his chest, I squeeze him. “I never meant to take it that far.”
My head rises with his chest as he sighs. “I can’t say that I’ll get over it quickly, but I love you too much not to forgive you. I need you too much to walk away. And I know …” He pauses. “I know that I’m just as equally to blame in all this. It never would’ve happened if I had just tried to talk—”
I shift to lean over him, cutting him off with a finger against his lips. “Shhh, we’ll never get anywhere with what-ifs. And I love you too … only ever, always you.”
His breath leaves him in a shuddering whoosh. He pulls my mouth up to his to kiss my lips tenderly. “Did I hurt you?”
My brows furrow. He knows he’s hurt me, but he’s talking about the sex. I shake my head, leaning in to bite his bottom lip. “I’ll take you any way you’ll let me have you.”
“Lia.” His brows lower. “Don’t. I’m here, which means I’m not going anywhere. I never was.”
I swallow. “Okay.”
He reaches a hand up to tuck some hair behind my ear. “Did you tell him it’s over and that you won’t be seeing him again?”
Oh, shit. Jared.
Not being able to talk, I settle for nodding my head. His eyes narrow on mine. “When?”
My tongue comes unglued. “Friday. He called me, and I told him. I’ve always told him, I just …” I blow out a breath. His hand falls from my face as I admit, “I really was lying, Leo. Though his interest in me had been clear before that, I never planned on doing a thing about it. He was just a friend, but then it turned into what I think most people have affairs for.” He remains silent, waiting for me to finish even though I feel him tense beneath me. “To get that connection again, that feeling that’s missing from their lives. I know this sounds horrible and I hate myself for it, but I wanted it back, so I …”
“You just gave in,” he finishes coldly.
“Yeah,” I say truthfully, not removing my eyes from his. He deserves my honesty. He gave me his. And if this is going to work, we need to share the hard truths. The soul crushing admissions. Then try to find a way to forgive, to work through it together.
“How’d you find me? And why didn’t you say anything before then?” I think I know, but I want to hear him say it.
“A guy I know. I wasn’t certain until he did some digging for me. But the hickey, the valet that night … that’s when I contacted him.” He averts his gaze to the window with a low growl that I feel reverberate through me.
Placing my hand on his stubbled jaw, I turn his head back to me. “I was weak. I’m still weak, but I’m determined to be stronger, to try to leave that broken part of me behind.” I beg with my eyes for him to believe me.
He swallows hard. “You’re not weak, Lia. You’re so strong that it scares the shit out of me. I never would’ve thought you’d have the guts to tell me face to face that you wanted a divorce.” He chuckles hoarsely. “Fuck, you stunned the shit out of me. For a split second, I almost thought to hell with it, that I needed to finally tell you. That something’s gotta change before I lose you.” He closes his eyes briefly. “But I didn’t know how. Every time I heard you cry. Every time I thought I could tell you, my fucking throat would close up. Besides, I never thought you’d walk away from me. I thought you were just fucking with me as some desperate cry for attention.”
I flinch from his words, my heart cracking a little. That he thought so little of something that took weeks for me to dredge the courage up to ask hurts. It hurts like hell.
He winces, his eyes softening as he cradles the side of my face and removes a tear that I didn’t even realize had escaped. “I’m sorry.” He pulls my face to his, kissing me. “So fucking sorry.”
I melt into his body as his tongue slides against mine, his hands gliding up and down my back until they rest on my ass. Grabbing a cheek in each hand, he grinds me over his hard length. “Again?” I whisper with disbelief.
He reaches between us, aligning himself with my entrance. “We’ve got a lot of time to make up for.” He bites my lip. I lift my hips and slowly sink down on him, his cum from earlier seeping out and causing us both to moan as he fills me so completely.
“You like that, don’t you? My cum filling you up,” he rasps into my mouth.
I nod, whimpering out a garbled, “Y-yes.”
He smacks my ass, grabbing my hips and shifting me up and down while his lips stay attached to mine.
“Dirty girl.” He pulls away, chuckling darkly. “Then I’ll just have to keep filling you, won’t I?” He nips my jaw and sits up, leaning back on an arm and using the other to maneuver me over him. His words and his actions elicit a loud moan from me.
“Answer me,” he demands roughly.
And he’s back. This is the Leo I’ve been craving. The filthy mouthed, sweet, bossy animal in the bedroom. He owns my heart every day, anywhere, anytime. But when we have sex, he owns parts of me that I never knew existed before him. I’ve missed it so much that I don’t hesitate to bring my lips to his, staring deep into his eyes as I tell him, “Fill me and never stop.”
His nostrils and eyes flare at my words, his arm leaving my waist to travel up my back and hook around my shoulder, causing my knees to ride up his sides as he seats himself so deep inside me that it almost hurts. “Fuck.” He ducks his head to my shoulder, nipping and sucking my flushed skin. “I can’t believe I ever thought I could do without this, without you.”
“Never again.” I grab his head, bringing my forehead to his and moving up and down in time with his controlling hand that’s drifted down to my hip. “Promise me,” I whisper heatedly.
“I fucking promise.” His eyes flash before sealing it with his lips on mine. Then he’s flipping me over, pulling me up onto all fours, and entering me from behind. He leans forward, gathering my hair into his fist and tugging, causing my back to arch as I meet his powerful thrusts. With emotions only heightening the pleasure, that familiar sensation is soon washing over my skin again.
“Leo, I’m … gonna come.”
He lets go of my hair and his thrusts slow as he wraps an arm around my waist and leans back on his knees until I’m almost sitting on him from behind. His other hand squeezes my breast, teasing my nipple between his fingers as he growls into my ear, “Come, I want to feel you shake as your pussy milks my cock.” He sucks my lobe, grinding and thrusting into me from below. His hand creeps down my stomach, gently rubbing my swollen clit and causing me to cry out as I shatter into a million pieces while he holds my trembling body. He kisses my neck, gently rubbing me to draw out the pleasure as his thrusts slow and he stills, emptying himself inside me once more.
“I love you.” His lips graze a path from my shoulder over to my neck and back again. “So fucking much, Lia.”
I swallow, trying to catch my breath as I breathe out, “I love you, Leo. Always.”
He kisses my shoulder one more time before slowly moving me off him and helping me into the shower, where he proceeds to wash every inch of my body before I take the loofah and do the same to him. I expect him to flinch, to shy away from my touch now that we’re out of our bed, but he doesn’t. His eyes watch my every move, but he only smiles when I meet his gaze. We dry off, Leo deciding on ordering pizza for lunch and watching a movie in bed.
I don’t know if it’s healthy that we’re not leaving this room, but we’re a thousand steps ahead of where we were last night, so I’m not going to say a word. Opting instead to just soak in the happiness of being wrapped in his strong arms as I sit between his legs and he feeds me, laughing as I dribble sauce down my chin.
That night, I’m lying on his chest again, tracing the dips and ridges of his abs with my finger when I decide to ask, “Do you think Charlie’s doing okay?”
He stares off at the news playing on the TV. “I think he’ll be okay, but he’s like a sponge, absorbing every detail of everything going on around him.” He sighs. “There’s no doubt in my mind that he’s not dealing with how things have been between us very well, but I’ll talk to him. Hopefully, he’ll see for himself over the coming weeks that things are getting better, and it’ll help.”
My finger trails up and around his pec. “I’m still worried. He knew it was you, the mess in the garage.”
He curses. “Really?”
I roll my eyes. “He’s nine, Leo. He’s not going to ignore something just because we want him to. He’s well aware of what’s been going on even if he doesn’t know the details.” I look up at him. “He knows whatever it is, it’s not right, and it’s messing with him.”
His eyes dart back and forth between mine, observing the worry in them. Brows furrowing, he says, “It’ll be okay. Like I said, I’ll talk to him.” He moves some hair off my face. “Do you think he needs to …?”
“Talk to someone?” I cut in, and he nods. “I don’t know. I guess we’ll see how things go.”
“You’re not alone, and I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.” He pulls me farther up his body, pushing my face into his neck. His hand winds into my hair at the back of my head. “We’re in this together. Like we used to be, like we always should’ve been,” he says sternly.
“Okay,” I answer, my heart swelling with so much relief that it feels like it’s going to burst all over him. He strokes my hair while he watches TV, and my eyes soon close as I drift off into the most restful sleep I’ve had in a long time. Wrapped in his arms, I feel warm and loved, my worries held at bay as I inhale his scent every time I breathe.