“I’m going to be a unicorn for the book parade.”
Leo chuckles, cutting into his steak. “How are you going to swing that?” He glances over at me, and I shrug, smiling and trying to hide the bubbling in my gut over today’s discovery. The check.
“Mommy will make something,” Greta says confidently, shoving a mouthful of corn into her mouth and chewing.
He laughs again, keeping his eyes on me. “Right.” His blue eyes pierce my skin as they narrow a fraction on my brown ones. I glance over at Charlie. “What are you planning to dress up as?”
He scowls. “I’m not dressing up. That’s for babies.”
Leo’s eyes shift from me to Charlie. “Halloween’s coming up at the end of the month. You mean to say you’re not dressing up for that either, then?”
Charlie looks as though that’s just occurred to him. “Umm.”
Greta giggles. “You can’t go trick or treating without dressing up. Why don’t you go as Mr. Grumpy?”
He scoffs. “No. Why don’t you go as Mrs. Annoying.”
Greta thinks about it for a second, “There’s no such thing—hey!” she squawks when it suddenly registers that he’s insulted her.
“Charlie,” Leo reprimands even though I can tell he’s trying not to smile.
“Think about something you want to go as. Maybe we can make you a robot costume?” I suggest. Charlie’s brows rise, his blue eyes alight with sudden interest.
We finish our dinner, and the whole time, I feel as though Leo’s eyes are burning holes into my skin. But I try to ignore it. Now’s not the time. Because what I’m going to tell him and the argument that it will no doubt cause is best had when the kids are asleep.
“Okay, you two.” I stand and take some plates to the kitchen. “Finish up and then it’s time for a shower and bed.”
“I need some ice cream first!” Greta demands.
“Greta, manners,” Leo says firmly as I leave the room. I dig the ice cream out of the freezer and scoop some into two bowls before taking them back into the dining room and grabbing the last of the dirty plates. Leo snags my hand as I’m about to grab his plate and moves his chair back, pulling me down into his lap.
“What’s up with you?” he asks quietly, taking the plates from my hands and putting them down before leaning in to kiss my lips.
Greta giggles behind us.
“Nothing. I’ll talk with you later.” My arms wind around his neck. His hand rubs up my back then glides up into the back of my hair.
“Daddy, you’re messing up Mommy’s pretty hair,” Greta informs him loudly.
“Shut it,” Charlie hisses at her.
“Why?” she whispers loudly.
Charlie sighs loudly as Leo and I both shake with silent laughter.
Leaning back, I look down into his eyes for a moment. I lift my hand to trail my finger down the side of his face to his lips as his eyes stay glued to mine. “I love you, Leo Xavier Vandellen.”
His brows tug together, but he says it back, “And I love you, Dahlia Jade Vandellen.” He then grins at the sound of his last name after it leaves his lips. I shake my head, kissing his nose before climbing off his lap to return to the kitchen and finish cleaning up.
After the kids are bathed and in bed, I hop in the shower too then head back downstairs in my pajama pants and a pink t-shirt. I find Leo in the living room, watching TV and checking emails on his phone, but the sight no longer worries me. Tugging my knitting basket out, I spread the blanket over my lap and get back to work on finishing it while Leo does his thing and the kids are hopefully falling asleep.
“How the hell are you going to make a unicorn costume?” Leo asks distractedly.
Smiling down at the crocheted blanket, I tell him, “I’m sure there’s something on Pinterest I can copy. I’ve got two weeks.”
He shifts, sitting up on the couch and stretching his arms over his head. “What’s a Pinterest?”
That has me laughing. “In short, it’s a website full of wonderfully crafty ideas.”
He grunts, standing up from the couch. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Okay.” I look up when he still hasn’t moved. “What?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “Never could take a hint, beautiful.” Leaning down, he tilts my chin up to meet his mouth. His tongue demands instant entry, and I give it to him, moaning as he skims it over mine. “Upstairs. Now.”
Swallowing, I pull back a bit. “I have to talk to you about something first.”
He straightens. “Well, come upstairs and do it. Unless you want to do it here.” He grins and I feel myself grow heated. I grab the basket, putting my stuff away and rising from the couch. He moves over to the coffee table, grabbing the remote and turning the TV off. “Come on.” He takes my hand.
“Leo.” I stop in the hallway, and he turns to me. “I saw Jared today.”
He drops my hand, rearing back against the wall. “What?”
My throat burns as I try to swallow, not wanting to repeat myself again. He heard me anyway. “I had to go into the shelter to tell them that I wasn’t coming back until his hours were done.”
He stares at the hardwood floor for a moment then laughs quietly, shaking his head. “And what? You thought you’d kill two birds with one stone?”
“I had to tell him in person. He …” I close my eyes for a second then reopen them. “He sort of became a friend, Leo.”
He walks up to me, chest heaving as he crowds me into the wall.
“I know about the check,” I blurt, and the stormy expression falls from his face. “He showed me.” I slide passed him to stalk down the hall, turning into the kitchen and snatching it from my handbag. He follows me, leaning against the doorway and tucking his hands into his pockets.
“Here.” I walk over and hold it out to him. “He said to say that he wouldn’t be needing it.” I slap it into his chest when he just stands there.
“Take it!” I demand when he continues to stare at me. It falls to the floor. “A hundred-fucking grand, Leo?”
His top lip curls into a sneer. “You’re mine, Lia. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep it that way.”
My heart pounds furiously as I stare up into his angry eyes. “You can trust me, Leo. I don’t want anyone but you,” I say quietly.
“You sure had a funny way of showing it.” His jaw clenches and he glances away. “If you must know, I sent it last week. After …” He doesn’t finish, doesn’t need to.
“That doesn’t make me feel a whole lot better, but okay.”
“I’m sorry. I’m supposed to make you feel better, am I? After I walk into some dump of a hotel room and saw that some asshole was about to fuck my wife?” he growls, and I recoil.
There’s nothing I can really say to that. Nothing. Even if my throat hadn’t closed up thanks to the looming tears that are now gathering in my eyes.
“Tell me, Lia.” He takes a step forward, his nostrils flaring. “Why the fuck you’d see him again if I’m the only one you want?” His voice is deceptively soft, putting me on edge. But I tell him the truth anyway. “Because it felt wrong not to at least say goodbye. He wasn’t some dirty secret of mine, Leo. Like I told you, he was a friend.”
He laughs humorlessly. “Yeah? And what about me, Lia? Did you even stop to think about me?” He slams a fist against his chest, growling, “Did you think about how I’d fucking feel?”
“Yes.” Because I knew he wouldn’t like it. “I’m sorry, but I don’t regret doing it. He deserved to know what was going on.”
He swipes a shaky hand through his hair, exhaling a breath through his nose before turning around and heading for the stairs. “Leo, wait!” I call out.
He doesn’t, and he doesn’t answer me.
Sitting down at the island, I wipe the tears from my face and wonder what the hell I’m supposed to do now.
I can’t let him pull away from me again.
So even though I’m terrified of taking any more blows to my heart, I get up and down a glass of water before going to make sure the house is locked up. But Leo’s already done it. I head upstairs, checking that the kids are asleep, and thank God that they are. I walk into our bedroom, but Leo’s not here. He’s not in the en suite when I walk in there and start brushing my teeth either. After washing my face, I march back down the hall and turn the door handle to the spare room. It’s locked.
“Leo.” I knock lightly on it. “Let me in.”
He ignores me. I lean my head against the door. “Please.”
“No,” he finally replies.
I lift my head. “I’ll sit out here all night, Leo. I’ll damn well sleep out here if I have to.”
“Go to bed, Lia.”
Gritting my teeth together as frustration and fear threaten to take hold, I snap at him, “You’re not shutting me out again. I won’t fucking let you.” I turn on my heel and march back into our room, my heart thumping fast with every step. Grabbing hold of our quilt and a pillow, I tug them out into the hall and drag them to the door of the spare room. Folding it over a few times, I lie down on top of it. If I’m really going to do this, then I’m going to be comfortable, damn it. Well, kind of, I think, as I squirm around and turn onto my side. Shoving the pillow farther under my head, I close my eyes.
I must’ve just fallen asleep when I hear the door open behind me, and Leo cursing as he bends down to pick me up. I wrap my arms and legs around him, rubbing my nose into his neck. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, sleep coating my voice.
He sighs. “You’re gonna have to let go of me if you want me to grab the bedding from the floor.”
“Don’t need it,” I mumble, inhaling his scent.
He shifts me farther up his body before turning and heading back down the hall. He passes me my pillow, and I take it as he grabs the quilt and drags it behind him. After kicking the door closed with his foot, he climbs onto our bed. “You’re not going,” I tell him.
“Don’t you think I know that?” he grumbles. “Fuck me, sleeping on the goddamn floor.”
I smile into his neck, kissing it as he lays down and pulls the quilt over us.
“Give me that.” He takes my pillow from me and puts it on my side of the bed. He rolls to his side and still, I hold him. And he lets me, which I take as a good sign, seeing as if he really didn’t want me to, he has the strength to pluck my arms off him.
“It hurts, Lia,” he says to the top of my head.
Guilt threatens to swallow me whole but I try to push it away. “How can I make it better?” I whisper.
“Don’t talk to him. Don’t see him. I thought it was pretty fucking obvious that I wouldn’t want you to.”
“I know, and I won’t anymore. You can trust me. You will trust me again.”
His Adam’s apple bobs near my nose as he swallows. “I do trust you.”
I snort. “You don’t have to lie to me, Leo.”
“Lia, despite all that’s happened, I still do. But not him. I don’t think you understand how much seeing that … how much it fucked with me.”
“I love you Leo, only ever, always you,” I remind him.
His hands wrap around my back, smoothing down my hair. “I love you, too.”
We fall asleep like that. And even though I know that he’s still not happy with me, I feel like maybe we’ll still be okay.
“Greta, you’ll eat the yogurt or toast. Pick one,” I say when she argues again that she wants Fruit Loops.
“But Grandma Tay lets us eat Fruit Loops when we stay at her place.” She crosses her arms.
Leo walks into the kitchen, sneaking up behind her to squish her nose and say, “Well, Grandma Tay doesn’t pay for your dental bills. I do.”
Greta sucks in a breath. “They’re not bad for your teeth! Fruit Loops have fruit in them, duh.”
“Ugh, just eat the food already,” Charlie groans.
Leo kisses them both, and I tuck their lunch boxes into their bags then turn to say goodbye to him. But all I get is a peck on the head. “Hey …” I say when he walks toward the entry to the garage.
“Got a meeting at nine. I’ve gotta go. Bye, guys.” He waves over his head.
Frowning, I turn around, finding both kids grinning at me.
“What?” I huff.
“Don’t be sad Daddy didn’t kiss you, Mommy. When I grow up and get married, my husband will not be allowed to kiss me. No way.” She pokes her chin out. “Oh, but he can rub my feet. That’s totally okay with me.”
Charlie and I laugh at her. “What? I’m being serious.”
I start the dishwasher then grab their bags. “We know. Come on and grab your toast. We’d better go, too.”
We all pile into the car and head over to the school. They run inside just before the skies open and it starts to rain. I wave to Lola on my way out and make the short drive back home. Pulling into the driveway, I stare at the big white and gray painted house that holds so many memories, good and bad, including the argument of last night. While I’m glad I persisted, I can’t help but worry if he’s still upset with me or if he’s trying to push me away again.
Sighing, I put the car into reverse. Well, I guess there’s only one way to find out.