The sky was overcast in Seattle. Dark clouds moved with the wind, threatening rain. Pulling on my zip-up sweatshirt, I waited in line for a taxi outside the airport. A black and white checkered cab pulled up beside me. Getting in, I rattled off the name of the arena where the concert would be tomorrow night. Even though his record label was more than willing to put Billy up in a fancy hotel, my father preferred sleeping on the buses. This meant I would be sleeping on a bus for the duration of the tour. Once Billy got his hands on me, I couldn’t imagine him letting me go stay in a hotel by myself.
Just as the cab took off, the rain started, a thick, heavy sheet that made it hard to see out the windshield.
“For business or pleasure?” the cabbie asked me. Through the mesh cage that separated the backseat from the front, I saw he had a crop of orangish-red hair.
“A little of both,” I answered, gazing out the window.
“Big concert tomorrow night. My kid wanted to go, but I think she’s too young. I heard this concert is pretty wild.”
I had a flash of the last time I was backstage at a Wild Minds gig. Screaming fans in the stadium. Women flashing their breasts for autographs. Marijuana and cigarette smoke curling like vines to the sky.
“Yeah,” I said, not bothering to sound too friendly. “That’s what I hear.”
“That why you’re going to the arena? You working at the show?” His green eyes met mine in the rearview mirror.
“No, I’m visiting someone there.” I kept my answer purposefully vague. People got weird when they found out your father was a rock star. On my phone, I scrolled through the several text messages I’d missed while I was in the air. The most recent was from Gabe:
Gabe: Let me know when you get in safe.
Me: I’m here. It’s raining. You get to Oregon?
Gabe: I’m here. Mom and Dad say hi. I saw Wild Minds is touring with Wanks and Janks. You should’ve told me.
I bit my lip and watched the rain slide down the window.
Me: I’m sorry. You mad?
Gabe: No.
Gabe: I’m not mad. I’m worried.
Me: Don’t worry. It will be fine. I have the papers with me. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?
Gabe: Okay. Be careful. Love you, Ads.
Me: I will.
Me: You, too.
The rest of the texts were from Billy. I read them in order. The first was from the morning my flight departed.
Billy: When does your flight land?
Billy: What’s your flight number?
Billy: I’ll send a car to pick you up.
Billy: I’ll come pick you up.
Billy: Call me when you land.
Billy: Are you ignoring me?!
I took a deep breath and prayed for patience. I hated it when he was all wound up like this. There was a text from Daisy.
Daisy: Hello! I can’t wait to see you. Please contact your father before he calls the National Guard. That is all. XOXO.
Thank goodness she was there to keep him calm. Without Daisy, Billy would become completely untethered. Quickly, I texted both back in a group message.
Me: Just got in. See you soon(ish).
Twenty minutes later, the cab rolled to a stop outside the massive arena. The rain was still pounding, the sky darkening.
“Would you mind taking me around the back?” I asked, knowing where the tour buses would be parked.
“Sure.” The cabbie reversed the car and circled the arena. “You hear about that rock star? The one who has a nanny but no kid?” Obviously, he was speaking about Billy. The tabloids had loved Billy’s torrid affair with Daisy, running headlines like Billy Wanks’ nanny takes care of him or Nanny knows exactly what Billy Wanks needs. They’d been obsessed with Billy keeping the nanny around after his seventeen-year-old daughter wasn’t. Speculation ran wild. My favorite was Daisy had split our family up. That she’d taken my father’s love from me and I’d been sent away.
Nothing could have been further from the truth.
Billy had fallen in love with Daisy a long time ago. At age ten, I’d caught them in the act and my eyes had gone to hell for a few minutes. Over the years, they’d kept their relationship under wraps. They didn’t want me to be exposed to the tabloids and gossip, didn’t want any more of my past dug up. When Billy rescued me from foster care, it was all over the news.
Vicky, my mother, had gotten pregnant with me when she and Billy were seventeen. She’d hidden the pregnancy from him. Billy was just twenty-two when he found out about me and became a kid raising a kid. Last year, Billy had turned thirty-nine. We celebrated in Vegas with a few strippers and copious amounts of booze. Everyone had gone to bed by two a.m. A very respectable time for Billy. My father had finally grown up. Sort of. He was still given to fits and mood swings. But he was a one-woman man now. That’s something.
“Rumor is that nanny of his is knocked up.” I hadn’t realized the cabbie was still speaking. “That’s why he’s quitting touring. He wants to stay at home with the kid. Not take it on the road like the other kid he had. Her mom was a druggie. I can’t even imagine.” The cab jerked to stop.
My tongue felt thick in my mouth. I couldn’t respond.
“Fifty-six bucks,” the cabbie said, shutting off the meter.
I dug into my backpack, fished out four twenties from my wallet and threw them into the slot for payment. “Keep the change,” I said hoarsely.
The cabbie counted the cash. “Hey, thanks, lady. You want me to help you with your bags?”
I was already out of the car lugging my duffel and backpack behind me. “No, thanks,” I called, slamming the door. The cab sped off and I was left alone in the dark parking lot. I pulled up my hood, which the rain almost instantly soaked and plastered to my head.
Up ahead, a chain-link fence surrounded a couple tents and shiny black tour buses. I scanned the fence looking for the opening. Ah, security was just off to the right. I headed toward it, my thoughts occupied with what the cabbie had said. There was no way Daisy was pregnant. It will always be just you, little bird. How could I want more children when I already have the perfect one? Billy had said the one and only time I’d asked for a sibling. Shaking my head, I chastised myself. No, Billy and Daisy wouldn’t have withheld such important information. It was just another stupid piece of gossip. I knew better than to believe rumors.
I was so preoccupied with my thoughts I didn’t see the arm come down and stop me from walking through the gate opening. The security guard was huge. Not so unusual. I didn’t recognize him. Unusual. Billy traveled with lots of bodyguards, but I knew them all. They must’ve gotten extra help for the tour. “Where do you think you’re going, missy?” he asked.
“Oh, sorry,” I said. “I’m here to see Billy.”
He guffawed. “Yeah. You and every other chick in Seattle.” A smattering of die-hard fans lined the fence, mostly females with soaked glittery signs and running makeup. He perused me from the tips of my sneakers to my soaked hoodie. “Trust me, you’re not his type. Maybe try one of the dudes from Wild Minds. Ash isn’t too picky.”
“He’s my father,” I said through chattering teeth.
“Ash?” The guard arched a skeptical brow.
“No, Billy.” I searched the empty lot. Where was everyone? “Is Trent around?” I requested Billy’s head of security, the one who’d borne witness, along with my father, to my compromising position in a shadowy little room on a couch underneath Warren. “He knows me.”
At length the guard studied me, perhaps willing me to go away and quit giving him trouble. Too bad for him, I was nothing but trouble. I straightened my spine, tipped my chin up and crossed my arms.
“Hold on.” The guard turned away from me, lifting a radio to his mouth. I shivered. Luckily, we were standing under a tent, but the weather had turned cold, and there was a bite to the wind. “Yeah, this is Frank at the front gate. I got a chick out here says that she knows Billy, says Trent will vouch for her.” The response was muffled. The guard turned back to me. “Trent’s coming. You better not be wasting his time.”
We stared at each other for a long time. I wondered what Frank would do if I tried to make a run for it. Finally, a figure emerged from the darkness. “Addy!” Trent jogged toward us. “Shit, you’re soaked through. Billy will skin me alive if he finds out we held you up at the gate. Frank, this is Addison Wanks, make sure she gets whatever she needs from now on.”
I put my hand out to Frank, smothering a smile. “Nice to meet you.” See, I could always be the bigger person.
“Sorry about that, Ms. Wanks,” Frank said, shaking my hand.
“No worries. Happens more than you’d think,” I reassured him. Not true. Not true at all.
“C’mon, Addy, let’s get you warmed up,” Trent said. Frank stepped aside and let me pass through the gate. “I’ve gotta get back to the arena. Everybody’s rehearsing but they should finish soon. Do you want to put some dry clothes on? I’ll wait for you and escort you backstage.”
“Ugh, no, thanks. I’m kind of beat. I think I’ll just wait for Billy on the bus.”
Trent stared me down with a smile that resembled a bulldog chewing on a mouth full of wasps. The radio in his hand went off, calling him. “I got to run. It’s good to see you kid. You can find your way to the Wanks and Janks bus?” He pointed to the middle bus, already halfway gone. “Sorry it’s a shithole. Daisy was trying to get the guys to clean it up, but you know them.”
“I’ll be fine.” I gave him a little wave. He took off running. I spun on my heel and faced the three tour buses. Sighing, I headed to the middle vehicle and prayed the smell wasn’t too bad.