Four weeks later.
Teaching wasn’t how I remembered it. My father helped secure me a long-term sub job for a teacher on maternity leave in a second-grade classroom. Next year, he assured me, there’d be something full time available. I had started making a life in Florida. It paled in comparison to what I’d had with Billy and Addy, the whole band. I missed them all with a fierce ache. I’d been in touch with Jett and Trent, checking in on Addy. She hadn’t recovered well from her surgery, and Billy ended up canceling more shows to stay in Vegas.
“Do you think I should come back?” I asked Trent the other night on the phone. I had a long weekend coming up. I could fly and see her, make sure she was all right. In my heart I knew it was a bad idea and was grateful when Trent rejected it.
“No,” he said, all gruff and sympathetic. “I don’t think now’s a good time. Billy’s working through some shit.”
A snot-nosed seven-year-old yanked on my skirt, nearly pulling it down. I removed his sticky fingers from my garment. “What’s up Teddy?” I asked.
“I’m done with my picture, what should I do now?” He held up a piece of paper with red crayon scribbles all over it. Two weeks into my sub job and I was tired. Teaching was taxing, mentally and physically. On the upside, I hadn’t thought of Billy much. Only at night, in the dark when I was alone.
“It’s time to start your story then,” I said, pushing him back toward his table. I glanced at the clock. Ten minutes until lunch. Better get the kiddos to start cleaning up. Another thing I’d forgotten: how long it takes to get a group of second graders out the door. It was like herding cats. I made my way to the head of the classroom, ready to clap my hands for attention. And Teddy was back at my skirt, yanking away again.
“Yes?” I asked, bending slightly at the waist.
“There’s a man here,” he whispered, doing a bang-up impression of the kid from The Sixth Sense. I wondered if Teddy might benefit from a visit to the school counselor. “He’s from the posters in my sister’s bedroom.” Yeah, definitely calling the counselor during my lunch.
“That’s nice—” A figure in the classroom caught my eye. Tall. Blond. Tattooed. Billy was here? I squinted. It couldn’t be.
A little girl whined, “Ms. Clemmens, who is he?” The class was silent, wary and watching.
“Billy,” I choked out. I still couldn’t quite believe. Had my broken heart finally driven me mad? Maybe I was the one in need of a counselor, or worse, a psyche ward.
He smirked. “Ah, you’re speechless. You know I like you best this way.” He tilted his head. “Then again I do enjoy your smart mouth. You use it so cleverly.” This said with a wink.
I put my hands over Teddy’s ears. Not like it would do any good. Twenty other children had heard Billy. Hopefully they were too young to understand his double entendre. “There are children present.” My students grew restless.
Billy sauntered toward me, weaving through second graders and low tables. I stepped back as he stepped closer.
I used Teddy as a shield, a barrier between Billy and me. Poor kid. “Is Addy okay?” It was the only reason I could think of for Billy’s sudden appearance. I caught a whiff of his spicy cologne. Everything, all the feelings I’d suppressed for him, ignited inside me. Fuck, I’d thought I was over him. Or at least, getting over him.
“She’s fine. In fact, she’s right outside. She’s looking forward to seeing you. We would’ve come sooner, but she needed to fully recover from her surgery.”
“I heard.” My throat was dry, full of dust. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”
The lunch bell rang, me and the students stayed frozen in place.
He nodded. “That’s my fault. I was an asshole. I didn’t know how to process everything that was happening. I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted,” I said. My heart pounded hard.
“You look beautiful, flower,” he said. I so didn’t. My blouse had stains on it, courtesy of an overzealous second grader with a juice box, and my hair was in a messy knot; I’d been too tired that morning to wash or style it.
Marcy, a second grader who picked her nose far too often, sighed and said, “Aw.”
“Since you’ve been gone, I’ve been thinking a lot. Been doing a lot too.” I had no response. Whatever he’d come for, I wasn’t going to make it easy on him. I breathed in and then out, waiting for Billy to continue. He sat on a low table, all casual, like rock stars in classrooms were an everyday occurrence. My students remained captivated. That was part of Billy’s charm, wherever he went, he commanded an audience. “I’ve met your father.”
I would’ve paid to see that. The Colonel and Billy facing off. “Oh? I’m surprised you still have all your body parts.” I crossed my arms. My whole body was shaking, threatening to fall apart, to kneel before Billy and beg him to love me.
He bit his lip. I remembered how he’d nibbled my skin. The marks had faded a couple weeks ago. He leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “Yeah, he threatened dismemberment. The man is dark, flower. You think I’m bad with my subordinates? You should see all the brownnosers scurrying after him. I got held up at the gate—” In order to get on base you had to be on a visitor list or have a badge “—then I mentioned Colonel Clemmens and bam, the man himself showed up with an entourage that puts mine to shame.”
“That’s how you got on base, my father gave you access?” I couldn’t quite believe it. My father was not a fan of Billy Wanks.
“He did.” Billy straightened, standing. “We had a lovely little chat, him and I. Well, after we got past the threatening to kill me part.”
“What did you guys talk about?” It pained me to look at him.
“We talked about red-headed women named after flowers who changed our lives, loved us, and how we lost them.”
Tears burned the back of my throat. Fuck, I was such a baby. Warm fingers wrapped around my wrist. “I know you and the Colonel have your issues but he loves you, flower.” He forced my fingers open and kissed my palm, right above the heart line. “And I love you, too.”
I snatched my hand back. Billy’s eyes darkened. My old self-esteem issues bubbled to the surface. Every girl has them. This was also accompanied by a last bid at self-preservation. “You’re just saying that because you want me to iron your shirts or find you blue suede for your dressing room or fill Jett’s pudding cups with mayo.”
Billy sighed and stared up the ceiling, hands on his fine hips. “Christ, I knew you were going to be difficult. Good thing I came prepared.”
Suddenly the man was on me. Teddy was pushed to the side. I totally owed the kid an apology. The room blurred as I was lifted into Billy’s arms. “What are you doing?” I hissed. I slapped his bicep. “Put me down. I’m in the middle of working.”
“Be quiet now, flower. I’m rescuing you from this god awful place.” The school was brand new and state of the art.
“What?” I squealed as Billy started walking, carting me from the classroom.
“I watched that movie.”
Teachers and kids were in the hallway. Curious faces surrounded me. Fuck, this was embarrassing. I hid my face in Billy’s shoulder. “What movie?” I had no idea what he was talking about. My brain couldn’t process what was happening. Little footsteps padded behind us. I peeked over Billy’s shoulder. My students were following us, kind of like ducklings with their mama. I gave them a little finger wave. “Everything’s okay guys,” I said.
Billy’s hand palmed my head forcing it back down on his shoulder. “An Officer and a Gentleman,” he explained. “Made the guys watch it too. It’s an awful movie. Full of clichés and shows far too much of Richard Gere’s ass. You have terrible taste in films and game shows. I sincerely hope our children don’t inherit it.”
I closed my eyes. In the last twenty minutes he’d told me he loved me and then promised me kids. Everything I’d asked for he was handing over on a silver platter. Bitter Daisy didn’t believe it. “Don’t play with me, Billy. Please, I can’t take it. If you don’t mean—”
His lips brushed against my hair. “I mean every fucking word, flower. I’m sorry for all the shit I did. I know I’m impossible to love. But you loved me anyway. For free. And I wasted it. I won’t make the same mistake again.”
I moved my head so I could peer at him. His green eyes shone bright and sincere. My fantasy happy ending morphed into reality. Words failed me. He kept walking. Damn, the man was strong. He showed no signs of tiring. The front doors of the school came into view. Through the windows I saw an even bigger crowd. Billy kicked them open and we were outside. Holy shit, the whole band was there, plus roadies, and security and other people I didn’t recognize. Addy was there, too, standing and smiling, her heart in her eyes. All were dressed as factory workers. It was a weird rendition of An Officer and a Gentleman, come to life in a military base school parking lot. Turner, Chord and Jett stepped forward. They each a held a guitar by its neck.
“I’m not fucking doing this,” Turner groused.
Jett slapped him upside his head with his free hand. “Just play the fucking song. We practiced all the way over here.”
Turner rolled his eyes. “You owe me for this, Wanks,” he said to Billy. “You’re lucky I like Daisy.”
The guys started to play, a tune I recognized: “Up Where We Belong,” the song from An Officer and a Gentleman. Jett sang, “Who knows what tomorrow brings …”
Billy shifted, letting me slide down his body. He wiped his hands on his jeans. The man was nervous. I didn’t think he was capable of the jitters. “Christ,” he muttered. “My heart’s beating so fast.” He knelt down on one knee. The magnitude of the moment hit me full force. Billy dug into his pocket and produced a box. He popped the lid. The crowd cheered, flags waved in the air. “I asked to borrow your father’s uniform for this but he refused. He seemed rather offended,” Billy said, confused.
“That sounds like him,” I said, my voice thick with all the emotions.
“I’m not an officer, and I’m sure as hell no gentleman but I love you, flower. Will you marry me?”
I smiled, tears cascaded down my cheeks. I gazed at the big rock inside the box. I bent and closed it. “No,” I said.
The music stopped abruptly.
The crowd quieted.
I sure knew how to crush a party.
“I don’t understand.” Billy stood, all sorts of wounded and confused.
I grabbed two fistfuls of his white tee and brought him closer to me, so our noses touched. “I don’t want to get married. I don’t think you want to get married either. I just want you. I don’t need a piece of paper to prove anything. If you love me that’s all I want.”
Strong arms wrapped around me. Billy held me tight. “Does this mean you’ll come back?” he asked, face buried in my hair. “I’m so sorry, flower. I know I’m not an easy man but I love you. So damn much. Fuck, you’re under my skin.”
“I love you, too,” I said, sniffing.
Billy turned to the crowd. “We’re not getting married but we’re staying together forever.” Shouts and cheers from the crowd. The band started to play again. People began dancing.
Hot kisses pressed against my neck, then Billy’s mouth found mine. His tongue slipped in, taking the kiss from G-rated to R. I remembered where we were. Our audience. “We’re at a school,” I said.
“You’re right, let’s get out of here.”
“Um.” I toed the sidewalk.
“Spit it out.”
“I’m at work.” I gestured to my ducklings-slash-second graders, dancing on the lawn. “I’ll give my notice, but I need to wait until they can replace me.”
“All right then. I guess we’ll have to stay then. How do you think the Colonel would feel about the band and me bunking up in his house?”
I laughed and kissed him.
“I’m serious, flower,” he grunted.
“I know.”
We kissed some more. And then because the kids missed lunch, Billy ordered pizza and ice cream sundaes for the class. I’d caused such a ruckus that I actually got fired the next day. It didn’t matter. I didn’t care. It just put me back into Billy’s arms sooner. I didn’t need my own classroom or students or a marriage certificate. I had Billy and Addy and the band. And that was enough.