Jessica

 

Jessica came home from an errand one day to find three members of the Nightwalkers waiting on her front step, each of them holding several plastic bags from a local grocery store. “Uh… What are you doing here?” she said, feeling apprehensive enough to clutch her keys between her two fingers, ready to gouge out eyes if any of them got aggressive with her. It wouldn’t be the first time she had to get creative in a fight with a man, and somehow, she figured it wouldn’t be her last, either.

 

“Just wanted to do you a favor,” Edgar, one of the more intelligent junior members of the MC said. “Got all your favorite foods. Lucky Charms, some cinnamon rolls, some pasta…”

 

“How did you know all that?” Jessica said, feeling her anxiety spike as she looked into one of the bags to see a brightly colored birthday cake with her name written across the top. Her birthday had been the month before. Since she’d just broken up with Gary at the time, she only celebrated with Macie, whereas before it’d be a huge party with the entire MC. She’d be lying to herself if she said that she didn’t miss it a little bit, being surrounded by that much welcoming energy. The MC really could be like a family at times, even if most of the time it was a dysfunctional, rotten family. But seeing the cake now, she felt a little chill go up her spine. What was this all about?

 

“We did our research,” one of the other members of the MC said to her, a guy whose name she couldn’t really remember even though he had a distinctive pock-marked face. “We also trimmed the bushes out front and brought some stuff you could use to plant your garden if you want.”

 

Jessica was tempted to repeat herself, asking what the fuck was going on, but she got the sense that she wasn’t going to get a straight answer out of these guys. So instead she just grabbed a bunch of the grocery bags out of their hands and stuck her key in the door, telling them to stay out of her apartment while she put the groceries away. They waited on the steps the whole time, peering into her window while she put the perishable goods in her freezer and fridge.

 

She stepped back outside a few minutes later, holding a knife in one of her pockets just in case one of the guys got rough. She wasn’t going to be attacked on her own fucking property. She’d waited too long to have her own place, and she worked too damn hard to have it just ripped away from her because the MC decided that she was their property.

 

“What is this all about?” she asked, keeping one hand in the pocket of her pants, wrapped around the handle of the knife. She tried to keep her breathing as steady and calm as possible, unwilling to betray her fear to these random fuckers she barely knew who were intruding on her personal space.

 

“Just trying to do something nice for you, Jess,” Edgar said with a shrug. “We know you work hard. You deserve a break now and again. Hey, if you let us, we’ll do a couple loads of laundry for you today. Ain’t got nothing else to do right now.”

 

“Why are you doing this?” Jessica said more firmly, glaring at them with as much malice as she could muster. “What do you want from me?”

 

The MC members looked at each other, wordlessly asking each other if they should be honest or not. Finally, Edgar turned back to her and spoke up. “Gary would like to have dinner with you.”

 

“Dinner?” Jessica repeated, flabbergasted. What the hell was Gary up to now? Throughout all their break-ups, he’d never behaved like this, even once. Hell, he’d never even asked her out on a date before. Why was he doing this now?

 

“Yes. A nice dinner, just the two of you,” Edgar said. “He says he understands if you’re too busy, but he’d really like to see you. Just as friends.”

 

Jessica was silent for a long moment, stewing over the information that Edgar had just shared with her, letting it sink in and trying to find the hidden meaning lurking within. There had to be a catch, right? Other than the obvious one that Gary was trying to get back into her life any way that he could.

 

If there was a gun to her head, and she had to give her honest answer, the real thing that she wanted to do, she would have rejected them out of hand and marched back into her house to enjoy her groceries. She didn’t owe Gary anything, not after so many years of mistreatment, not after she’d given him so many chances to turn his life around and stop acting like a dick. But…the Nightwalkers knew where she lived. They probably knew how to break in, if she was being realistic about her situation. With a snap of his fingers, Gary could make them do other things, other not-so-nice things to make her feel unsafe. And it wasn’t like there was anything that Jessica could do about it, either. The cops in this town were terrified of Gary. He was the closest thing this community had to a judge, jury, and executioner. What could she do?

 

“Fine,” she finally said, practically spitting the word out of her mouth as if it was poison. “Tomorrow night. But we meet at the restaurant, okay? None of this showing up at my apartment unannounced bullshit. Tell him to text me.”

 

She turned on her heel and stormed into her apartment, locking the door behind her and drawing the blinds down so that the Nightwalkers couldn’t see inside. She leaned back against her wall, away from the windows in case they could peek around the blinds. Jessica wished she could call Macie and tell her to come over, just so she’d feel less scared. But she didn’t want to be weak. She didn’t want to be soft. She had to be strong. That’s how she’d survived this long, and it’s how she’d survive tomorrow night as well. She’d be tough. She had to be.

 

# # #

 

Jessica

 

Jessica dressed as conservatively as possible for her “date” the next night, wearing a thick black sweater over her dress so that she didn’t show any cleavage, as well as putting ill-fitting leggings on her legs so that she didn’t run any risk of turning Gary on inadvertently. She was waiting outside the restaurant for about five minutes when Gary showed up, dressed in a sharp dress-shirt and tight black slacks. Clearly, he’d put in a lot of effort to look nice, dressing very differently than his usual uniform of a leather jacket and some torn-up jeans.

 

“Good evening,” Gary as he approached, leaning in to place a friendly kiss on her cheek. Jessica flinched back from his touch automatically, but if Gary noticed, it didn’t show on his face. “Shall we go in? I’ve reserved us a table near the back. I know you like to be close to the bathrooms in restaurants.”

 

“Uh, thanks,” Jessica said, her body stiff as she walked beside Gary into the restaurant, following him back to the reserved table.

 

Before she could sit down, Gary pulled out her chair for her, smiling at her calmly until she took her seat. He sat down across from her and immediately ordered a bottle of the most expensive wine possible for the table, politely thanking the waitress before she walked away. This was not Gary, at all. Usually he was rude and crude, ordering people around like he owned them. Where the hell was this polite act coming from?

 

“You look lovely tonight,” Gary said, taking a breadstick from the center of the table and breaking it in half before handing part of it to Jessica. “Dip it in the olive oil. It tastes great that way.”

 

Jessica put the piece of bread down on her appetizer plate, staring down at it for a long moment rather than eating it. She had this awful, painfully paranoid thought that maybe the food was poisoned or something, as if Gary went to such great lengths just to roofie her. Honestly, this whole “date” was so disorienting, so completely different than all of her other experiences with Gary that she had no idea how to react.

 

“So. What have you been up to?” Gary said, continuing to smile warmly at her as the waitress returned to pour them both glasses of red wine.

 

Jessica allowed herself to take a couple huge gulps of wine before answering. If there was ever a time when she needed some liquid courage, it was now. She almost preferred it when Gary was rough and mean. At least then she knew what to expect. But now she was so completely out of her depth, unsure of what to say or do to make this night go as smoothly as possible. “Um, just working a lot,” she said, hoping that would be the end of that discussion.

 

“Oh, so your new job is going well, then?” Gary said in between little sips of wine. “That’s great! I’m so happy for you.”

 

“Thank you,” she said stiffly, shifting uncomfortably in her seat and avoiding direct eye contact with her ex.

 

“Is it a nice place?”

 

“It’s nice enough,” Jessica said with a shrug. “I mean, it’s a bar. How nice can it really be?”

 

“Well, I don’t know. There are dive bars, like Sully’s, and then there are more upscale places. You know, like in the city, when you have to pay a cover charge just to get in. Is your new place like that?”

 

Jessica shook her head. “It’s a lot like Sully’s, only…. cleaner,” she said, laughing despite herself.

 

“Good, that’s good,” Gary said, ripping off another edge of bread and dipping it in oil before placing it in his mouth. “And the crowds? Are they bad a lot of the time?”

 

Jessica shrugged. “It really depends on the night. Like any other bar, I imagine. On weekends things are rough. They get really busy, but every other night it’s fine. Plus, I’ve got other people working with me who help me out, so it’s never a huge deal.”

 

“Why kind of clientele do you tend to serve there?” Gary asked, returning to his glass of wine to wash down the bread.

 

Jessica was about to answer when the waitress returned to take their food orders. After the waitress walked away again, she said, “Well, mostly it’s just nice people who want a drink, you know, like anywhere else. A couple of the girls who used to hang around the MC and lost interest with whoever they were dating over there show up now and again, and they recognize me, which is nice. But sometimes, well, there are guys who get creepy and weird.”

 

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Gary said, his forehead wrinkling up in concern as he stared across at Jessica. “Are you safe?”

 

Jessica nodded, and for a brief moment she felt a little bit warm inside, thinking that Gary still worried about her, and not even in a totally selfish way. Maybe there was a part of him that loved her, even if he was still a pretty fundamentally broken person deep inside. But within a few seconds she pushed those thoughts away, uncomfortable with the familiar part of her that always used to defend Gary and make excuses for him. That was the part of her that allowed her to be treated so badly for so many years, the part that allowed Gary to cheat on her and emotionally manipulate her and control her. Well, no more. She wasn’t going to let herself care about him, not after knowing what the consequences would inevitably be.

 

“It’s fine, though. The crowds are nice. They tip well,” she said, trying to dismiss the topic. She would be more comfortable if they stopped talking about her. She was about to turn the conversation back around and ask some stuff about the MC, but Gary cut her off, suddenly firing off questions much faster than before.

 

“Oh, yeah, the tips are good? Do you know what the turnover is for a place like that? Do you get to look at the books at all? I’d be so curious to know if stuff on that side of town is profitable, you know. Do you know?”

 

Jessica shook her head, feeling a little bit dizzy from hunger and fear and uncertainty. Luckily, the waitress returned with their food, putting the lamb chops that Jessica ordered earlier down in front of her. Jessica immediately dug in, grateful for an excuse to focus on anything other than the questions that Gary asked her. What the hell did she know about the financial operations of a bar? She had never even been to college, for Christ’s sake. And why did Gary care, anyway? He was making more than enough money over on his side of town.

 

“So who’s the owner? You know, who’s your boss?” Gary asked, twirling his spaghetti around his fork without actually putting the food into his mouth. There was a fire in his eyes, an intensity behind his words that made Jessica uncomfortable, freezing her in her tracks and preventing her from swallowing for a few seconds until she finally realized that he was waiting for a response.

 

“Um, his name is Tom,” Jessica said, even though she regretted answering the question as soon as the words left her mouth. “Yeah, um, I don’t know him very well, though. He keeps to himself.”

 

“Where’s he from? Is he new in town or does he have family here?” Gary asked.

 

“I don’t know,” Jessica said slowly, stabbing her lamb with her fork and bringing a huge chunk of it to her mouth, chewing on it for a while to keep her mouth occupied and prevent more conversation. God, when will this night end? When will it be over? Jessica silently prayed to God or whoever else was listening in on her thoughts.

 

But Gary didn’t let up, apparently still encouraged by the fact that she was acknowledging his questions at all. “Is he affiliated with anybody?”

 

“What do you mean?” Jessica asked, even though she figured she already knew the answer to his question.

 

Gary looked around the restaurant for a bit before leaning in over the table and dropping his voice to a low volume. “I mean, any other MC’s? Are the Eagles behind him?”

 

“I don’t know!” Jessica said, even though she was pretty sure the answer was no. Still, she was beyond irritated at this point. Why the hell did Gary care so much? What was his game here?

 

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry,” Gary said, finally scooping up some of his pasta and transferring it to his mouth. He kept talking, his mouth full. “I’m sorry for pushing. I’m just so curious about what you’ve been up to, that’s all.”

 

“Are you sure?” Jessica asked, feeling her skin prickle with anxiety, her hairs standing up at attention like they were getting ready to jump off her body entirely.

 

Gary nodded and finished chewing. “I just like to know that you’re okay, you know. That you’re safe. Protected.”

 

That last word made Jessica’s stomach turn over, the lamb she’d just ingested threatening to make a comeback. She didn’t know why it bothered her so much, but for some reason it felt sinister coming out of Gary’s mouth, like it had an entirely different meaning, one that intended to hurt her rather than keep her safe. Jessica shoved her plate away, the idea of eating any more meat honestly repulsive to her at this point.

 

“Are you okay?” Gary asked, his voice dripping with concern. Too much concern, honestly, like he knew exactly what kind of effect he was having on her.

 

Jessica shook her head, breathing deeply to calm down. “I think I need to go home,” she said.

 

“Okay, I’ll give you a ride on my bike,” Gary said, throwing a wad of twenty dollar bills down on the table and reaching for Jessica’s hand. “Come on. Come with me.”

 

Jessica hesitated for a moment. “I think I’d rather walk, if that’s okay with you.” She inwardly berated herself for adding the last half of that sentence. It shouldn’t have to be okay with him, she told herself. I’m the boss of me now. I’m the boss. He doesn’t get a say in what I do or don’t do.

 

But if that were true, Gary apparently still hadn’t gotten the memo, because he shook his head and scoffed at her. “Nonsense, it’s thirty degrees outside. It’ll take you half an hour to walk home from here. I’m taking you home. End of story. Now, come on.”

 

Jessica slowly got to her feet, briefly considering bolting out of the restaurant and screaming for help. She wondered what would happen if she did that. Would anyone actually help her? Would anyone listen? Would everyone just let Gary carry her off anyway, knowing that he was the boss in this town?

 

In any case, she didn’t attempt it, too nervous to do anything to piss Gary off while she was so vulnerable. She wished she’d at least brought her kitchen knife with her. Even if she couldn’t really do any damage with it, it made her feel better, like she had a fighting chance to stand up against Gary if he tried something. But as it was, she was utterly weaponless, completely weak compared to him. There was nothing she could do.

 

She slowly followed Gary out to the parking lot, where his bike was propped up against the outer wall of the restaurant. “Come on, get on the back,” Gary said as he straddled his bike, revving up the engine until Jessica did as instructed, shivering as she wrapped her arms around his waist. She used to feel so free doing this. She used to feel so rebellious and careless and wild, riding on the back of Gary’s bike. But now it was the opposite. She felt like she was in chains, tied to him no matter how hard she tried to break free.

 

She breathed deeply, forcing her lungs to work like they were supposed to as Gary’s bike soared out onto the streets, revving past all the traffic to get on the backroads. This was Gary’s domain, his kingdom. He ruled these roads. The cops were too scared to patrol on them, knowing that Gary likely had boys camped out in the bushes, ready to fire their guns off at the first sign of trouble. Out here, nobody could hear her scream, and anybody who did certainly wouldn’t care. She was trapped. She was stuck. She was fucked.

 

What’s he going to do me? Jessica wondered as Gary sped up, taking a sharp corner on a road that she barely even recognized. Is he going to kill me? Rape me? Take me back to the Nightwalkers’ compound and never let me go? Any of them seemed like viable options, honestly.

 

But finally, he turned off of the backroad, suddenly arriving in Jessica’s neighborhood. She was taken aback by the sight of her own apartment as they rolled to a stop. She’d never taken that path before, but here she was, right on her own front lawn.

 

As soon as Gary shut the engine off, Jessica jumped off the bike. “Thank you,” she said quickly. “For taking me home. Goodnight.”

 

She turned quickly and headed toward the front door, her heart pounding in her throat as she heard Gary’s footsteps follow her. “Jessica! Wait up a second,” he said.

 

Jessica shut her eyes and froze on the spot, praying silently that he wouldn’t force his way into her apartment. “I just wanted to give you a hug really quick,” Gary said as he came up behind her, turning her around before wrapping his arms around her shoulders, chastely brushing their bodies against each other. “Goodnight.”

 

She couldn’t force herself to move for the longest time, screwed into place as she watched Gary get back on his bike and ride off into the dark night, far away from her.

 

What the hell just happened? Gary acted like a gentleman the whole night, save for the brief period when he asked intrusive questions about the Gorge. What did he want from her? And what the hell was she supposed to do now?